


Cleaving the Stars

by selcouthinspired



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Ahsoka - E. K. Johnston, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Ahsoka Tano, Barriss Offee Redemption, Bittersweet Ending, Darth Vader Redemption, Darth Vader can’t get Ahsoka to care about the dark side, Emotional Manipulation, Enemies to Friends, Eventual Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, Hurt No Comfort, Limb Severing, Look At Your Life Look At Your Choices, Mind Games, Multi, Post-Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, Pre-Star Wars: Rebels, Sad Ending, Sad with a Happy Ending, but Ahsoka can get Darth Vader to care about her, the world between worlds
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-19
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:08:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 32
Words: 79,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23210731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/selcouthinspired/pseuds/selcouthinspired
Summary: One year after the formation of the Empire, a skirmish on an outer-rim agrarian moon of little consequence draws enough attention to warrant a member of the Inquistion be dispatched.Darth Vader decides to take over the operations instead.
Relationships: Ahsoka Tano & Darth Vader, Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, CT-7567 | Rex & Ahsoka Tano, Hedala Fardi & Ahsoka Tano, Kaeden Larte/Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 590
Kudos: 483





	1. Prologue

* * *

_through the night that was endlessly long and dark,_

_I know your wish had silently disappeared._

_I’ll wait for a long time, I will definitely find you._

_even if you’re so far that I can’t see you,_

_let’s go to the place at the end of the dawn._

* * *

\- “Dear Name” by IU from the album _Palette_

* * *

Vader bent to deferential knee, circuits whirring with the effort. Across light years and star systems, the blue of fickle holo-transmission brought his Master to life in the darkness of his chamber. Feelings abounded, pulled from his person, swirling through their connection before he could even get the words he had prepared off the tongue.

“Lord Vader,” his Master croaked, “I sense a great conflict within you. So potent, even from such a distance. What have you discovered?”

Vader fisted cybernetic hand, the creak of artificial digits clearing his distracted thoughts. He struggled to steady his breathing that labored through the helmet’s vocoder, punctuating every beat that passed in silence. His Master grew restless, impatient. Vader lifted his head just slightly, careful of the inflection of the words he used. Even though the modulator regulated most every emotion, the young Sith Lord could never let his control slip.

Not in the presence of the Emperor, his Master. It would be seen as weakness.

“My Master,” he began, “I believe I have discovered the location of Anakin Skywalker’s former apprentice.”

And on an inconsequential moon in the outer-rim, no less. Her exploits had reached him through a series of reports that might have slipped his eyes, if not for the peculiar request that a member of the Inquisition be dispatched.

“Ah,” Sidious drawled, image flickering, “Are you certain?”

He’d felt the remnants of her Force presence in the atmosphere alone, the surges of fear, panic, paranoia...

“... It is her.”

“So it is.” Sidious agreed, “Hmm. Skywalker’s apprentice... _Ahsoka Tano_ , was it? We believed her to have perished during the purge. Where have you located her?”

“Raada. In the far reaches of the Outer-Rim.”

“And have you pursued?”

“I have alerted the Imperial base stationed on the moon of my arrival.” Vader informed, “They await my presence to proceed.”

He took a deep breath, the respiration echoing, and continued, “Obtaining Tano could lead us to other lost Jedi.”

“... Perhaps.” Sidious seemed to ponder that, “But I sense from you something... _more_. Tell me, Lord Vader, what is it you desire?”

“My Master...” Vader began easily enough, but he was unable to disguise the inclinations of his desperation within the folds of the Force. He felt rather than saw his Master’s imploring gaze - who didn’t wait for an explanation, simply rooted around in Vader’s thoughts, poking and plucking them apart. Feelings vivisected and lying at his feet like fallen leaves, Vader could do nothing but wait for his Master’s verdict.

“You wish to... _convert_ her,” Sidious spoke, tone indicating he found the idea... amusing.

“It was Tano who recognized the Jedi Order flawed long before even I,” Vader rationalized to his Master, just as he had rationalized it to himself before having opened the communications channel, “She’d departed before their plot against you had been conceived. I believe that, with the truth of the Jedi’s betrayal revealed to her, she would forfeit her endeavors on Raada and submit to your rule.”

Sidious brought his hands together, let the pads of his fingers drum a silent beat as he deliberated.

“You understand the difficult position you’ve placed me in, Lord Vader.”

“Yes, my Master.” Vader said, the dawn of his horizon dying. Still, he clinged to a beam, refusing to acknowledge it as hope. The longer the silence drew out, however, the more that ray escaped him.

Halted, Vader ventured, “She could be indoctrinated into the Inquisition.”

Sidious cackled, the sound crisp as the crack of thunder.

“Your words betray you,” he said. “You think her talents to be wasted among them, squandered.”

Vader could not deny it. Though he oversaw them personally, and though they’d proven thus-far effective, the Inquisition were a temporary organization within the Empire’s grander scheme. The hierarchy of their group ensured them loyal, always considerate of competition; but too focused were they on opportunities and power-imbalances to consider that, when their purpose was served, their fates would be the same as the very Jedi they’d sworn to slay.

_They_ were not where Tano belonged.

Moments passed. Vader felt nothing through their tremulous Force connection, recognized it as his Master’s purposeful occluding. He wanted him to squirm, to sweat, to be uncertain. Vader doubted then if his request was worth tearing away the bridges that linked him to his new Master’s mind. He didn’t want to be shut out, discarded. Not after everything. There was still so much he had to learn about the ways of the Dark side of the Force. How to cheat death, how to stop those he loved from dying.

_How to bring them back._

Unbeknownst to Vader, however, Sidious felt he held Vader by loose, ever-thinning strings. The death of his wife had frayed his already fragile trust. To deny his new apprentice too much would be to waste his potential.

_And besides_ , the Sith Lord mused to himself...

_Every slave, regardless of their rebellion, needs a few incentives to stay in line._

Perhaps, for a time, this one would be Vader’s.

And, if what Vader had once told him about Tano’s resurrection on the mythical Mortis was true, then the girl had a rare connection to the fabled Daughter; and powers worth unlocking, powers worth exploiting. Powers that, if manipulated correctly, could be used to serve his vision.

“It’s decided,” Sidious finally spoke, and Vader tensed with anticipation. “You will capture and bring Tano to me. There, I will assess her willingness to comply. I leave the obtainment of the former Jedi to you. But be warned, Lord Vader, any defiance will be met with a swift and terrible blow. If she does not submit, it will be _you_ who wipes her existence from the galaxy.”

Vader nodded stiffly his assent.

“Yes, _my Master_.”

The transmission fizzled to nothing. The connection was gone. Vader stood and swept his way to the bridge. Through the viewport, he peered down upon the moon, had his first officer hail a transport.

“Yes, my Lord.” They acquiesced to his command, “Very good.”

Vader continued before they could shuffle away, “And alert my pilot that I will not be docking at the Imperial base.”

The officer’s curiosity spiked.

”My Lord?”

“I will land at the base of the mountains.”

“... Er, yes, my Lord.” They nodded. Before stepping away, “Very good, my Lord. Might I ask, why?”

”You might.” Vader intoned, cloak billowing as he entered the lift and turned, “But you will receive no answer.”

The doors closed. The officer’s upset followed him to the hanger-bay. He didn’t need to discuss the strategic value of his decision to his officer, he decided. Despite Imperial protocol and regulation, he reported to no one save his Master. He’d proven, since his apprenticeship to Sidious, to be the exception to all rules. And anyway...

It kept the officers on their toes, them never knowing what to expect from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> new AU! the title was inspired by a line from the movie Treasure Planet. the opening is short, but there’s a lot more on the way. I’ve had this AU stored away for awhile and thought about waiting until I was finished with desert’s oasis, but I’ve recently been watching Rebels again and it’s really inspired me to work on this as well.
> 
> let me know what you think! I love reading theories :)
> 
> the link to the translation of the lyrics of the song that prefaces this chapter are below as well as a link to a performance of the song  
> [translated lyrics](https://www.google.com/amp/s/genius.com/amp/Genius-english-translations-iu-dear-name-english-translation-lyrics)
> 
> [performance](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8zsYZFvKniw)


	2. Reunion pt. I

The Force faltered, failed like a dying transmission. Vader came to halt in the forest, the visage of the mountains just ahead of him. His cybernetic fists curled. He attempted to lash out, to bring back what swiftly dissipated - but it was no use. The fragments of her Force signature had mislead him. The feelings he’d sensed above the moon’s surface had been only remnants, things left behind in an absence. He’d come too late, and she’d evaded him.

The Force’s refusal to allocate him stirred within him unpleasantness. He channeled it as his Master had instructed, used it to search not for the one he came but for something else, something potentially tied to her. He found it in the form of a life not far from his position. Slowly, his gaze slid down the mountains towards the caves and hills that rested within and around their faces...

He’d read over the report multiple times, analyzing its contents, dissecting it’s every syllable. The capture of the rebel Kaeden Larte, the interrogation, the infiltration of the Force wielder...

The subsequent disappearance of not just the one or the both of them, but many other Raada citizens as well.

 _You threw your lot in with these traitors,_ he opined scornfully.

The wind whistled past. Slowly, ever so slowly, Vader unclenched his fists.

_But you were scared_ , he conceded, surprised at the tenderness of the thought. Quickly, he squandered the sentiment and continued on foot to the mouth of one of the caves.

There, fear emanated the strongest.

* * *

They recorded the interrogation, leaked it after. Pillar ensured it would catch the eyes of rebel factions. How long it would take Tano’s eyes to find the footage, however, remained unclear. Vader knew not how organized the rebellion yet was, or if Tano was even a part of it - only that it was there, that her involvement was likely.

_She’s merely been misguided_ , Vader ascertained to himself as he swept from the holding facility. Pillar waited for him, opened his mouth to speak, but Vader swept past without so much as acknowledging the Lieutenant. Urgently, he assured himself,

_When she learns of the Jedi’s deception and assassination attempt on the Emperor, she will see reason._

* * *

Ahsoka stood in the heart of the Fardi’s complex, surveying its ruins. She was not shocked to find it the way it lay before her, walls scorched with the residue of blaster-fire, the furniture overturned, the flat roofs caved in and the occupants missing... she’d had the sense before she’d departed that she could be leaving them to such a fate as they’d unquestionably endured.

“ _Hedala_.” Ahsoka agonized, the sting of the youngling’s loss as sharp and visceral as the losses she’d endured the day of Order 66. The Empire had come, discovered her sensitivity to the Force. They’d killed the girl and possibly her entire family. The evidence was there - the fight, a fleeing, a massacre. And Ahsoka had left them all behind, had left them to that fate. She sunk to her knees amidst the destruction, honed in on the feelings she’d thought she’d long buried, attempted in vain to release them into the Force.

The Force, it seemed, would not have it.

 _I could’ve prevented it,_ she’d later confide to Organa, once she’d managed to pick herself up off the floor and bid a final farewell to the lost child, _but I was too much of a coward to stay. The moment the Empire showed up, I ran.  
_

 _You saved yourself_ , he would remind her, _and there’s far more you can do alive than you could do dead_.

But these thoughts were hard to stomach, were dangerous ways of compartmentalizing. She had no way of knowing if the Fardi family had been killed or captured, if Hedala had been slain for the mere sin of her existence or if something even more diabolical had occurred. She’d seen this before - remembered the war, remembered the bounty hunter Bane and his attempts at taking Force-sensitive children. She grimaced at the memory of her capture - her folly could have cost the galaxy countless lives. But Anakin had refused to let her die, had refused to give up until the children were found. Time and time again, when she realized she’d been in over her head, her Master had swooped in to save her.

But she couldn’t do the same for him - not when it had mattered most.

That day... _Order 66_. She had nightmares about it, still. An entire year after its execution, and she could still feel the pain, feel the betrayal and shock that rippled throughout the galaxy, its echoes still ricocheting through the Force. She hardly remembered her escape with Rex. Everything blurred together in her memory. What she remembered best was the aftermath, discovering Obi-Wan’s encrypted broadcast and her attempts to reach him in the Force, to reach Master Plo, Anakin...

Anyone she’d had a shred of a connection to within the Force, and none of them had answered her desperate pleas.

”Rex...” She’d sobbed, the gravity of the situation finally sinking in to her bones and sinew and spirit, “I... I can’t _feel_ them. I can’t feel _any_ of them. _Anakin_...”

He’d reached out, held her in his arms. Her grief belied the shock of his action. She’d gripped at his armor, weeping,

”I can’t feel _Anakin_. I think he’s... Oh, _Rex_ , what do we _do_?”

Now, an entire year since the purge, Ahsoka sat in the cockpit of her ship that idled in safe space. She searched the Force for a weapon she could use against the _terror_ she’d seen in the grainy, “leaked” footage Bail had discovered for her, its figure imposing, red lightsaber drawn and gleaming against Kaeden’s throat. Ahsoka had studied the image for a long time, trying to decipher any clues - but the creature holding her friend at blade’s end was unrecognizable. The hilt of their saber had been hidden by the glove of their hand, their face obscured by a menacing helmet.

She’d set to leave soon after she’d witnessed its frightening figure. It was only fortune that Bail had been planning something for Raada, anyway. With her spearheading the operation, he was certain they could evacuate the inhabitants and save Kaeden.

Ahsoka meditated, traversing through a galaxy with fewer Force sensitives than there ever had been before. It was like a gaping, infected wound. Moving her mind from the festering hurt, Ahsoka eventually found what she sought; the crystals that called out to her were not the ones she’d left behind on the moon that the Venator-class star destroyer had crashed upon, but different. A pair, _twins_ , existing somewhere she could not go. Coruscant’s surface came to the minds eye, the insignia of the Empire branded into its every surface.

_Building lightsabers will have to wait._

But that was where the kyber crystals sang the strongest.

Ahsoka frowned, opened her eyes. The stars greeted her. The possibility of returning for the saber she’d left at the Clones’ graves, as well as the shoto she’d chucked on the far side of the moon, came again - but Ahsoka disqualified the idea when she realized they were both likely long gone. The Empire would have left no stone unturned.

And anyway, she’d left them to be discovered.

“Guess I’m going in weaponless.” Ahsoka sighed. She prepped the hyperdrive of her ship for take-off, and the stars blurred their goodbyes as she entered hyperspace.

* * *

She exited hyperspace above the moon Raada, and immediately the unbalanced atmosphere threw her off.

It was... _cold..._ and yet, somehow, _familiar._

 _”It’s the dark side, Ahsoka.”_ Said the memory of her late Master’s warning.

Even when she reached the surface and stepped down, sun beaming, the chill of that terrible feeling was enough to almost make her shiver.  
  
It was nightfall by the time she found Miara, Kaeden’s younger sister. She laid by a fire, face drawn and tight even in sleep. She whispered her name and roused the girl from restless slumber, and the child woke with a frightened gasp, realized who had risen her and proceeded to cry into Ahsoka’s shoulder, clinging to her like she were her last line of defense.

 _Perhaps,_ Ahsoka thought despairingly, _she was_.

_”Kaeden said you would come back.”_

Ahsoka’s heart clenched. She asked what happened to Kaeden, why Miara was all alone. Miara related through her tears and hiccuping sobs how a terrible thing came, how it knew Kaeden’s name, how it demanded her sister come out lest it blow the hillside and kill them all. Kaeden had listened, hoping to distract it whilst the others sprung a trap. But it failed. Neera had stunned Miara, hoping to save her life. What happened next was unknown to the child, but when Miara had opened her eyes...

” _Everyone_ was dead. Neera, Kolvin...”

She related how he’d been cut in _half_.

Now, Ahsoka stood in the center of a deserted street, stretching her awareness and her ability to be recognized within the Force outward. She’d sent Miara to Selda’s with the hologram she’d recorded whilst in hyperspace, the one that would ensure the civilians knew they were to be evacuated, where they would need to flee to for rescue. Organa’s fleet would be arriving soon with his ships for that exact purpose. As for herself...

She would be confronting the one she knew, undoubtedly, to be a _Sith_.

* * *

Vader felt it, the moment she’d touched down upon the surface. The spike, the sudden shift - he knew she felt _him_ , too. Though her countenance was not alarmed by familiarity. Instead, he sensed her wariness. She was on the war path, ready to erase his existence from the galaxy. Anger flared momentarily within the cavernous space in his chest. He reminded himself to be patient - she did not recognize him within the Force, not anymore. Either that, or she _refused_ to recognize him.

The latter, he suspected, was more likely than the former.

With only a word of warning to the officer stationed at his side to prepare for a rebel invasion, Vader exited the compound and made his way into the town. There, he discovered her easily.

She’d been waiting for him.

“ _You_.” She said, voice harsh and full of contempt - different from how she would have spoken to Skywalker. 

“So,” he began, as steadily he could at the sight of her, “You received my message.”

Her face was harsh lines, but beneath the raging fire in her eyes was thinly concealed fear. It was in her stance, her posture, the line of her shoulders and the curl of her fists - she knew of him, but a quick search through that demeanor revealed to him... she knew not of her former Master’s fate.

She believed him dead...

Vader’s countenance grew severer. She was right to - Anakin Skywalker _was_ dead.

... and any and every attempt she’d made to find him through their once-bond had proven to be made in vain. So she’d cut it off, mind calloused from the trauma, entire being resigned to the truth.

She was alone, unwilling to trust. In this endeavor, Vader decided, revealing to her the truth of her Master’s fate would be... _strategically_ beneficial.

”We need not be adversaries.” He stated clamly, “If you come quietly, I can assure you the lives of the Raada occupants will be spared.”

”I don’t trust you.” Tano shook her head, disdain lacing her words, “You killed _innocents_.”

”The cave-dwellers?” He asked, “You mean the people I gave an ultimatum - deliver me the Larte girl, and I’d let them leave in peace. They refused, and tried to kill me. I only retaliated in defense of myself.”

”You would have killed them anyway.” Tano said, “I know what you are - you’re a Jedi killer. You’ve come to kill me.”

Vader asked, “Are you a Jedi?”

Tano’s lack of answer was answer enough.

”I’ve no interest in Raada.” Vader stated after a moment. It was true - coming to the back-water had been a means to an end. _This_ was the end. “I promise not to harm them if you surrender. They’ll live to defy the Empire another day.”

Her hard expression flickered - she’d sensed the truth in his words.

”And for how long?” She asked after a long moment, “The Empire’s destroyed the soil here - the people will starve, perish. What will the Empire do to ensure their survival?”

”I would presume,” Vader began, growing tired of their line of dialogue, “that the civilians would be relocated. That is... if you have not arranged for that already.”

”You mean imprisoned.” She corrected lowly, ignoring his insinuation. “They’d be forced into working in labor camps.”

”If they desired their survival, and continued to resist...” Vader stated tiredly, “Then, yes.”

“That’s slavery!” She cried.

Angered by that word, Vader snapped, “I will squabble over this no longer. Surrender now, and I will not - against my better judgement - subject them to the fate they rightfully deserve.”

Tano searched the eyes of his helmet, seeking the gaze separated by its crimson lenses. He sensed her confusion, her suspicion. Deciding it was time, he deliberately moved back the edge of his cape, revealing to her the hilt of his newly constructed saber. It resembled that of Skywalker’s, and the replication had been intentional - why construct a new design when the original had been the most functional? Her eyes widened at the sight of it - it’s darker plating, it’s minimal changes. He felt her dawning realization, her horror. The familiarity she’d denied herself finally made itself known...

” _No_...” She exhaled around the word, full-body trembling. “It can’t be. You _can’t_ be... I don’t...”

Tears gathered in her eyes, streamed down the slopes of her cheeks...

”... _Anakin_?” She asked, voice breaking on the name.

”That _name_ ,” He began, short, “No longer holds any meaning.”

She shook her head vigorously, stepped back...

”I don’t believe this.” She whispered, and something within him _unlatched_ at those familiar words. _“_ I can’t... I _won’t_...”

”Your _belief_ is inconsequential.”

”My Master could _never_ be as vile as you!” She shouted.

”Your _Master_ is _dead_!” He bellowed.

Tano closed her eyes, took a deep, centering breath. Lowly she responded,

”Then _I_ will _avenge_ his death.”

”You _will_ come with me.” Vader corrected.

”So you can kill me?” She laughed without humor, the sound cutting and derisive. She asked, “Do you think you can make me lead you and your new Master to others like me?”

She added, disheartened, “If that’s the case, then you’re out of luck. I don’t think any others survived - and even if they did, I don’t know where they are.”

”They survived.” Vader assured, “But at the moment, they are not my heaviest concern.”

Her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

”You must be bluffing.” She scoffed, catching on to his intentions. He wasn’t surprised - he’d made them known in the Force, hadn’t tried to conceal them from her at all. He wanted to be transparent as possible with her. He knew...

He _knew_ she would accept nothing but the entire, unambiguous truth now. It was the only way she would trust him again.

And he didn’t desire her remaining within the ambiguity and lies any less than she herself did.

”You must be lost indeed to _ever_ think I would join you in the dark side.” She laughed without humor.

”You deceive yourself by believing it is a _choice_.” He spat.

And with that, the Force unleashed, arrived at his beckoning and surrounded Tano’s form. She struggled within invisible binds, attempted to stave off every onslaught he directed her way. But it was useless - she was not as powerful as him, not without the dark side. In time, she would learn to better shield. For now, however, it was paramount he retrieve her without struggle. With one last, powerful surge, she succumbed to the suggestion of sleep he propelled upon her.

When she was finally unconscious, he released his hold. She fell sideways. He lowered his arm and moved to stand above her body.

Swiftly, he pressed the hailing beacon on the control pad at his wrist.

”Lord Vader.” The shuttle pilot acknowledged him instantly in that familiar voice he’d heard throughout the war, “I’m headed your way now.”

“Pilot.” He returned on the frequency, “Alert my Star Destroyer that, as soon as I am aboard, we will pull out of Raada and return to Coruscant.”

”Yes, my Lord.” The pilot responded swiftly and efficiently. That was how Vader preffered it - the clones, though being decommissioned at a rate quicker than he cared for, never failed to follow orders, nor did they attempt to pester him with questions they knew he’d refuse to answer.

Ending the frequency, Vader bent to inspect Tano. Already, she’d grown restless, would wake soon. The desire to reach out and touch her arm was fleeting, but it was there.

_Squander such sentiments_ , he reminded himself, pulling his hand back and grabbing the Force inhibiting binders he’d hooked to his utility belt upon departure. He secured them over her wrists, and she awoke in time for the shuttle to touch down not far from their position.

When she realized what he’d done, she glared only a moment before the reality of the situation set in. She stood with little effort. The ramp of the shuttle lowered, and Vader gripped her shoulder in a vice.

” _Board,”_ he commanded, and, head lowering, she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> information and certain dialogues taken directly from the Ahsoka novel (and Rebels series and Original trilogy) - I did my best to give as much information as I could on what occurred for Ahsoka after Order 66. If you haven’t read the novel, the gist of it is...
> 
> (SPOILERS FOR THE AHSOKA NOVEL AHEAD)
> 
> ... she and Rex fake their deaths, split up and go their separate ways (but they try to keep in contact when they can.) They both head for the outer rim and Ahsoka finds a job working for a family named Fardi. They have a Force sensitive daughter named Hedala and Ahsoka leaves after Imperials show up, even though she knows it could spell doom for Hedala. In the actual Ahsoka novel, she returns to Hedala and the Fardi clan after her endeavors on Raada must come to a brief end. Before this, however, one of the Inquisitors has been stationed to follow Hedala and kidnap her if her supposed ability to use the Force is true. In the Ahsoka novel, this Inquisitor forfeits this mission when he receives word that a Force user has been spotted on Raada. In this AU, because Vader decides to take over operations on Raada instead, he remains and follows Hedala. I’ve implied that, because he never left, he discovered Hedala’s force sensitivity to be true.
> 
> I hope this helps, if there’s anyone who hasn’t read the novel and might be confused. If you have any questions, I’ll gladly answer them! Thank you for reading :)


	3. Remembrance

The brig was as it was before, clinical and cold, a way-point to something worse. Hands still bound, knees drawn to her chest, Ahsoka sat up against the wall of her cell. Across from her stood Anakin, obscured - a monster straight out of a nightmare.

“You faked your death.” He said, voice and inflection unrecognizable through the helmet’s grate, punctuating the beats between his every breath.

“... What happened to you?” She asked quietly, terrified at what the answer might be. She knew him, knew he’d never don such an eye-sore if it wasn’t absolutely necessary. “Why do you... why are you _in_ that?”

“I’m to assume,” he continued, ignoring her questions, “that your survival means you were aided. I presume it was the Clone Commander who accompanied you on Mandalore, yes?”

Ahsoka blinked, frowned. Sputtering she asked, “Are you... are you referring to _Rex_?”

“Answer the question.”

“ _What_?” She asked, incredulous, “You turn to the dark side and suddenly _forget_ everyone’s _name_?”

“ _Answer_ the _question_.”

“What did you _do_?” Ahsoka blinked, and her vision blurred. “On that day... I’d thought you’d _died_. Do you have _any_ idea how that made me feel? Now, I understand... you _cut me off_. You shut me _out_. One by one, I felt their deaths. It was _searing_... it was as if parts of me were being burned away. You had a role in that, somehow. I _know_ you...”

Ahsoka couldn’t go on. She couldn’t voice all the conclusions suddenly coming to her, all the warnings she’d ignored; the Force’s vision, the bond she’d had with Anakin breaking, Maul’s words - how she hadn’t believed them. She’d thought he’d been lying to bring down her guard, make her vulnerable. He’d wanted her help, but she could never have believed that what he’d spoken what seemed so long ago had held any truth.

Figuring out who Anakin was now, that he served the Sith Lord who paraded around as the victim of some Jedi assassination attempt...

It was all too much. It _hurt_.

“You would do well to forget your Master.” Anakin said almost... _tenderly,_ if that was any more possible _._ “Your bond has been broken. Trying to forge it anew will only cause you strife and unneeded strain.”

“ _Anakin,”_ Ahsoka said, frustrated. She was unable to stop her voice from shaking. “Why are you... what are you even _saying_? I _know_ it’s you in there, just... _changed_ , somehow.”

And she’d hoped she’d been wrong, that _Maul_ had been wrong. When Anakin had shown her his lightsaber, she’d hoped more than anything that it was a just a trophy, that the man who stood before her now had killed her Master and taken his saber. But a search into her feelings had revealed the truth she would have, and she was horrified to admit it, gladly rejected if it meant none of what was before her was real.

Even if it meant her Master had died, at least he would have died fighting for the light.

Anakin appeared to contemplate something. The inability to read his face unnerved her. He’d always been expressive, even in the subtlest sense. She’d learned in her time under his tutelage how to read the minute details of him, how to differentiate between a glare and a scowl or a smirk and a smile and the meanings of both and everything in-between. But the helmet hid him, and the inhibitor binders securing her wrists meant she couldn’t reach out and search him in the Force.

_Not that he’d be any easier to read in that regard, either_ , she thought disdainfully. He’d completely blocked her off. She would have never known it was him, had he not chosen to reveal himself to her.

”From now on,” Anakin spoke after a severe silence, “You will refer to me as Darth Vader.”

Ahsoka stared into the bulbous eyes of the mask, found only her horrified, despairing expression looking back.

” _Darth Vader_?”

“You know the true nature of the Emperor.” He continued, the change in subject so sudden it almost gave her whiplash. “You realize this means you may never leave my custody and live.”

Resigned, she rolled her eyes and responded, ” _Figures_.”

”How did you come across the knowledge of the Emperor’s Force sensitivity?”

Did she tell him about Maul? The former Sith hadn’t told her anything directly, really, only hinted. She’d figured it out after everything regardless. It was likely Maul hadn’t gone undetected by Sidious. She wondered if it mattered, keeping Maul’s survival a secret. But something inside her asked for refrain. She didn’t understand why, and the feeling didn’t elaborate. But it was gut instinct, so she followed it.

”It wasn’t hard to figure out, who Palpatine really was.” She began, cagey, “I had a lot of time on my hands to think about it. I came to many conclusions in my time in solitude. He ordered the execution of the Jedi. He implanted the clones with chips that _forced_ them into killing innocent comrades.

”Every time we were called away to report to him, he always... he always took you aside. I thought he _cared_ about you. I know now that I was wrong.”

”You know not what you speak of.”

”I don’t? Which part?”

Anakin paced, cape flinging out.

”Those chips were inhibitors.” He began, the conviction of him so potent it might have convinced her, hadn’t she known the truth. “They were meant to make the clone army follow every command without fail. You are correct in that the Emperor ordered the execution of the Jedi, but you are incorrect in assuming the intent was without reason or justification, as you so imply. The Jedi turned on the Republic. They’d been preparing to kill the Emperor and the rest of the Senate.”

”You _don’t_ believe that, do you? Do you really think the Jedi could have plotted that in good conscience?”

”How easily you forget what the Jedi did to you.” Anakin said, too calm, “How they discarded you, because it was convenient, because when they’d been backed into a corner, they’d willingly sacrificed _you_ to save their reputation.”

”And who backed them into that corner?” She asked him, “Who forced them to make that sacrifice, as you say?”

”You _defend_ them.” He accused.

” _Yes_.” Ahsoka sighed, “I defend the Jedi, because I know now that nothing that happened was in their control. The Council made mistakes, I’ll give you that, but the Jedi as a whole?” 

The modulator crackled as if Anakin were going to speak-

Something _beeped_. Ahsoka looked from his mask to his arm. It was his wrist comm. He ignored it for several moments as he regarded her. Then, finally lifting his arm, he opened its channel with a single click.

”Lord Vader,” came a familiar, austere core-world accent over the frequency, “We’ll be exiting hyperspace within the next few minutes.”

”Understood, Moff Tarkin.” Anakin replied. Ahsoka felt the disbelief course through her.

_The knife doesn’t just stab, it twists_.

Anakin ended the frequency, looked down at her once more...

”We’ll be going now.” He said shortly.

Ahsoka stood without a word or resistance. Storm Troopers flanked her as they exited the cell. As they traversed the corridors of the ship, Ahsoka kept her eyes fixed to the back of Anakin’s frame. Anakin had always been tall, but now he towered. The changes within him were obvious, even if she couldn’t see what she suspected was there, sitting just behind the mask: poisoned scleras, vibrantly hideous irises. But there had to be something else. She couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d been modified, in some fashion. Was it a choice? Or had the monstrosity been forced upon him? Maul had said that Anakin had long been groomed for his role, but Ahsoka refused to believe it. Anakin had never been entirely virtuous, but he’d always been _good_. Passionate and impulsive as he were, he’d been kind and considerate to his very core. If he were being led down a dark path, then he’d been led blindly.

Sidious had manipulated him. It was the _only_ answer she would accept.

But she dared not dwell on it for long, for soon they were on the surface, and the sight of the Temple transformed into the Emperor’s palace threatened to break what was left of her resolve.

* * *

Walking through the halls of her once-home was agony. She could feel the wound that was the imbalance festering anew. How Anakin was unaffected as he led her to the spires was beyond her. There had been a _massacre_. How could he stand to be in a place once so sacred, turned to such a farce?

He truly _had_ changed.

Maul had been right about _everything_.

The past echoed. The temple was the epicenter, the point at which anguished despair emanated. Ahsoka stood stiffly in the elevator. They’d been flanked by Storm Troopers on the way from the docking bay all the way to the Temple’s ground level hangar. But now they were alone again. Ahsoka couldn’t deny the pounding of her heart. Nothing about Anakin had ever been unfamiliar to her, but now the ground on which she walked with him was terrain never before traversed.

A gloved hand settled slowly upon her shoulder. The shock of it sent her back in time, to the capture and trial. They’d been in this very situation before, she only now realized, on their way to find the Council’s verdict. The only difference was the circumstances, the likely outcome. She’d survived Sidious’ scheming the first time, but that was only because of Anakin’s involvement. Now, it was Anakin himself subjecting her to her fate. Anakin, who went by Darth Vader, whose mind had been twisted.

”You’re afraid.” Anakin said. “You needn’t be. If you pledge your loyalty to my Master today, your life will be spared.”

His grip on her shoulder was neither an anchor nor a leash. It was simply there, existing maybe to ground her. Surely, it wasn’t to comfort.

”I _won’t_.” Ahsoka said with finality, “And you’ll be forced to kill me.”

His ire was evident in the tightening of his grip. He spun her to face him.

”It doesn’t have to be this way.” He said.

”Then make me an offer I can’t refuse.”

She thought of Maul’s desperation the day of his capture a year before, how he’d been willing to grant her the answer to any question, so long as she joined him. He’d told her everything, all she needed and wanted to know. And still she hadn’t listened. Her blind spot was Anakin. It always had been. And now the galaxy was suffering because of it. Had she joined Maul, would things have gone differently? Had she stayed with Anakin, would any of what had transpired ever happened? Or would Sidious have found other ways to separate them all? The what if’s were numerous and all-consuming.

But they weren’t what she wanted to focus on right now. The current moment mattered more than anything.

Anakin stood so still. He might’ve passed for a statue, had she not known he lived and breathed within the tomb of his suit. She hated her intentions at the forefront of her mind - what Anakin was now wasn’t redeemable, and still she wanted him back. His helmet inclined; he was tilting his head in curiosity.

”You said you wouldn’t join me. What is this?” He asked, almost angrily.

”I won’t join the Empire.” Ahsoka said, feigning calm, “I won’t submit to your Master.”

”Listen to my words.” Anakin said contritely, “Submit to him _today_ , and your _life_ will be _spared_.”

Realization dawned in her eyes.

“You’re still holding out hope I’ll turn to the dark side.” She murmured sardonically.

”... Patience.” Anakin said at last, right before the elevator reached its highest level. Whether the word was directed at himself or her, she couldn’t be sure. The doors parted on the hall that extended into the council chambers, now a throne for the Emperor.

”Ahsoka Tano.” Palpatine - no, _Sidious -_ greeted without warmth once they’d entered. Flanked on either side by the Red Guard, he smiled wickedly, flashing ragged teeth beneath the brim of a dark hood. Ahsoka found herself halting. Only Anakin’s hand on her shoulder kept her from stalling completely in the threshold.

“How nice of you to join us today.”

“I didn’t have much of a choice.” Ahsoka said without pleasantness. Anakin stopped her feet from the foot of the throne. Sidious’ seat sat on a raised dias. She had to look up at him to meet his wicked eyes that glowed in the shadow of his brimmed hood. “Strange that you’re so welcoming. You disregarded me in the past.”

“On the contrary, you did have a choice.” Sidious said congenially. “You being here is proof of that. And my inconsideration of you before was a mistake on my part, I see the error of that now.”

Ahsoka spoke through gritted teeth,

”Is that the best you can do at an apology?”

Sidious’ smile curled into a thinly veiled sneer. He moved his gaze to the side and addressed, 

“Lord Vader.”

Ahsoka couldn’t conceal her shock at Anakin’s _kneeling._

”My Master.” Anakin responded in greeting.

”You’ve held up your end of the bargain.” Sidious said easily, almost humorously, “Now, I shall hold up mine.”

Sidious did something then that Ahsoka couldn’t have predicted. He undid the binders at her wrists with a flick of his hand. They fell to the floor with a resounding clang.

And then he did something that she _had_ predicted.

Sidious lashed out much like Anakin had on Raada, the only difference the direction at which the onslaught of the Force flowed. It engulfed her mind, invaded her thoughts. Ahsoka couldn’t cease it, was unable to resist it. She’d never felt a power as cruel and all-encompassing. Bending beneath the will of his power, she sank to her knees.

“Your intentions are obvious.” Sidious said lowly, “I needn’t even invade your thoughts as I do now to know what you scheme, but I do this to show you the power the dark side offers, to remind you that _you_ have no power here. You say you had no choice, but I see why you came. You think you can convert my apprentice back to the light... _you don’t know the true power of the dark side_.”

He released her. Ahsoka crashed roughly onto her elbows. She panted, winded by the act of trying to shield alone.

“Let me make things clear to you, _Ahsoka Tano_.” Sidious snarled, “Your life is worth something to me, and because your life is worth something to me, I allow you to live today, and tomorrow, and the next day after that, so long as your worth remains.”

” _I_ _won’t_... _join you_.” She spat.

To her immense disbelief, Sidious openly laughed, the sound a sharp, grating cackle.

”No, you won’t.” He conceded, but in his tone wasn’t derision, only... _agreement_. He continued, “There can only be two. Where you will be placed is not unlike what you’ve known before, a group of Force sensitives working towards a common goal. You will never be a true Sith, but you will, in time, learn the ways of the Dark Side.”

To Anakin, he spoke, “Your original suggestion has appealed itself to me. Tano will be placed among the Inquisitors until I have further use of her.”

Anakin’s displeasure was strong enough to taste. Ahsoka shakily pulled herself to her feet, squared her shoulders and stared Sidious down.

”Henceforth,” Sidious decreed, “Ahsoka Tano will be known as the Thirteenth Sister.”

”Yes, my Lord.” Anakin said simply, voice a rumble through the vocoder.

”I don’t get a say in this?” She asked bitterly once they were back behind the pseudo-sanctuary of the elevator doors. Vader didn’t address her when he spoke, sarcastically,

”You heeded my words. You’re time in hiding has made you resourceful.”

She would have laughed from the hysteria of it all, had she not been so exhausted.

”You’re mocking me.”

”You hid among _farmers_. You were never one to run.”

”What’s wrong with farmers?” She asked simply. “Everyone has to make a living somehow. We can’t all be _pawns_.”

His head turned slowly toward her...

”And,” She hurried to add, before she could provoke whatever wrath she felt simmering just beneath the surface of his suit, “The Empire didn’t give me much of a choice. It was either run and hide or be killed.”

”But you were no longer a Jedi.”

”It didn’t matter.” Ahsoka said tiredly. She could try reasoning with Anakin again about the inhibitor chips, but she knew it was useless. He believed his words. When he spoke, he thought what he said was truth. Unless she could find a way to prove to him that she was right, then nothing she said would matter.

”I had lightsabers. I had been a Jedi, and I was resisting the Empire at every turn.” She continued, “And I need to know that you kept your word. Are my friends on Raada safe?”

” _I_ did not harm them.”

”That didn’t answer my question.”

”I told you I would leave them in peace, should you surrender. If we are going to be technical, you did _not_ surrender - and still I spared them.”

” _Please_.” Ahsoka begged. She stepped back until her frame hit the elevator wall. Exhaustion creeped upon her like a predator stalking its prey. The new normal for too long had been the abnormal. She needed the rest she knew would be a long time coming. She needed the assurance she’d done at least one thing right, that the people on that moon hadn’t died because of her failures. That Kaeden...

That Kaeden hadn’t ended up like Hedala.

Ahsoka closed her eyes. She would have wept, she thought, had she any more tears. She couldn’t hide how she felt, not when it was that strong. She wouldn’t hide anymore. Even if it made her look weak. Even if it brought terrors she knew she’d soon face ever closer to the present, she resolved to face whatever came next with all the honesty and resilience Anakin had shown her countless times throughout her apprenticeship, throughout the war...

”Rebel ships occupied the moon soon after my fleet entered hyperspace.” Anakin informed after several moments. Ahsoka opened her eyes to find him facing forward as he spoke, “It was reported to me that there was a skirmish. Civilians stormed the prison. Those who escaped are of no immediate concern. Those who surrendered or were captured have been relocated to Imperial labor units. None among them went by the name of Larte. I checked such reports myself.”

Ahsoka gaped. Relief coursed through her. His words weren’t everything she’d wanted to hear, but they were better than him confessing that the Empire had killed the entire population.

The elevator came to a stop, the doors parted...

”Come.” Anakin gave the simple command. Ahsoka peeled herself from the wall and followed, wanting nothing more than to trust his word.

It was all she had, now.

But as they walked, it was Sidious’ words that reentered her mind.

_“Your life is worth something to me.”_

_What does he have planned_ , she shuddered to wonder, _and what role will I play in it?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it took me so long to update because I was waiting for these new episodes to drop. (they were amazing!) I had this chapter stored away for awhile but decided to wait to see if I would need to change anything because I KNEW Filoni would pull some wild cards on us!
> 
> trying to write Vader and Ahsoka interactions... I try to go for serious and meaningful but I felt I often landed on absurd and crackish ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ it’s just such an awkward situation they’ve found themselves in. It might get even more awkward as we go along. But the situation is also kind of humorous, hence the absurdity. Despite being a Dark Lord of the Sith, Vader’s mentality to me rn is one that’s very “Desperate Father Trying To Connect With Rebellious, Teenage Daughter Whilst Juggling Work Related Issues.”
> 
> Ahsoka referring to Vader as Anakin was an intentional choice. She’s still holding out hope for him, even if he won’t acknowledge her efforts. But Ahsoka’s refusal to allocate his demands might spell doom down the line... we’ll have to wait and see...


	4. Rescue pt. I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 05/09/2020 - some of you may already know, but I’ve waded back through the previous chapters and edited them to better fit the season finale of the clone wars. so just a heads up that this AU has gone through some minor fixes. thank you, please enjoy!

_Less Than One Year Ago_

* * *

_“You asked me what we should do.”_

His hair grew, the dye faded. Ahsoka’s inexperienced hands cut away what was left of the blond. When she needed him to tilt his head, she maneuvered him with touch so painstakingly careful it caused his heart to clench.

”You’re takin’ it awfully slow.” Rex said, blinking away the wisps that fell into his eyelashes.

”I’ve never had to worry about hair before, Rex.” Ahsoka responded.

”I only need it thick enough so they can’t see the scar.” He reminded softly.

”I know.” She said dismally.

Rex cleared his throat.

“I could do this myself.” He offered.

“... Sure.” Ahsoka agreed reluctantly, offering him the sheers handle forward. He took them gently, staring at her all the while. She made her way to the other end of their encampment, looked up...

_“I’m going to liberate my brothers. Whoever I can, however I can.”_

... a bird cawed in the distance. Rex kept an eye on her until he saw her lower, take up the lotus. He could lose her to meditation for hours. He turned back around and started his work.

_”I’ll help you.”_

He stared into the reflection of his helmet’s visor, studying his trim. He’d kept it as close to scalp as possible, having vainly liked that small, differentiating factor. Besides his brilliant battle strategies and lead-by-example attitude, one of the reasons Rex had admired General Skywalker from the get-go was his lax approach to regulation. What a soldier did with his hair and body mattered less to the man than how he fought and persisted in battle.

Rex lowered his helmet, entire frame slumping. He’d had time to wonder, dragging his brothers’ corpses out of the Star Destroyer, what fate had befallen his General - but not for long. It was that same evening after they’d left the ship and the graves behind that Ahsoka had come out of a meditation-induced trance, eyes overflowing with tears...

_”No.”_

Night fell, the atmosphere growing cold. The season was changing. It would only be a matter of time until the first frost reached their camp. Rex started a fire. Ahsoka stared into the sky, expression unreadable.

_”It’ll be dangerous enough. You know it won’t be safe for you. We can... we’ll keep in contact.”_

”We need to leave.” Ahsoka said, and something about the way she said it sent shivers down his spine.

Again came the caw of a bird. Rex turned his eyes to the sky, saw the winged creature flying in slow circles above them. Together they watched it, Rex making his way to Ahsoka’s side. Once there, she extended her arm. To Rex’s shock, the convor swooped down, perched itself atop her offered limb...

”Do you, um, know this bird?” Rex asked.

The way the convor, plummage a green and white so vibrant it seemed unfitting that the species could be native to such a barren moon, looked at him made Rex wonder if it’d understood what he’d said.

”... I do.” Ahsoka said after a moment, a faraway look in her eyes. The convor cooed low, fluttered its wings...

”Somehow...” Ahsoka continued, voice a cryptic whisper, “Somehow, I do. Her name is... her name is Morai.”

”You don’t remember how you know... _Morai_?” He questioned, frowning.

”... No.” She responded, somber. She shook her head. “But I have a feeling that I will, soon.”

Rex looked between the two, uncertain. A chilling breeze swept past...

He turned to the horizon, saw the falling snow in the far distance drawing ever closer. When he turned back, the convor was gone. Ahsoka looked up at him from beneath her grey cloak.

”You were right.” She said dourly, regretfully. The skin around her eyes tightened as she struggled to speak the words, “We need... to go our separate ways.”

She extended her hand, shaking from the cold. Rex took her palm in his own without a second thought. Hand-in-hand, they made their way to the Y-wing.

_”If I ever fail to check-in...”_

_”Don’t. Don’t say things like that.”_

_”Rex, if I_ ever _fail to check in for any extended period of time just... just assume that... you’ll need to... destroying the communicator is your safest bet.”_

_”I don’t want to think about something like that.”_

_”I know, and I’m sorry.”_

* * *

_The Present_

* * *

Seelos’ salt plains hadn’t been Rex’s first choice for a base, but they’d been the safest option presented at the time. That, and the downed AT-TE’s from the sieges had been promising. He’d found the most intact one, worked on getting it back on all six feet. The repurposed R7 helped, though the condition he and Ahsoka had discovered their memory databank in hadn’t been completely recoverable. The little droid remembered nothing, had started again brand new. In ways, Rex envied them; they’d forgotten the tragedy of the end of the war.

But Rex would always remember.

And now he worked at collecting water from the moisture vaporator he’d implanted into the plain a little after he’d arrived. A handful of mushrooms had sprouted, but they weren’t nearly big enough yet to eat. Tying off his pouch once he’d rung the vaporator dry, Rex slung the sack over his shoulder. Moving to return to the AT-TE, he spotted R7 barreling across the plains, wagging his holo-pad back and forth in their clawed hand as they beeped a litany of,

_Message! Message! Message!_

Rex faltered. His heart did a somersault in his chest. He put one foot in front of the other until he was running. R7’s servos got caught in the split between the patches of ground, and the little astromech fell face forward.

”Careful.” Rex chuckled, mood soaring as he helped R7 back onto their tracks. He didn’t know how long it had been for Ahsoka, wherever she was in the galaxy, but 37 rotations had passed him by since her last encoded transmission. Taking the holo-pad, Rex entered the passcode that would bypass the fail-safes. He’d long since memorized the encryption key, didn’t even need to return for the cheat-sheet aboard the AT-TE. Settling down right there on the ground, sun beating across his back, R7 sidled up beside him so they could read, together, the words,

_Rex, if this message finds you, it means I’ve engaged the enemy and didn’t succeed._

His grip on the holo-pad momentarily loosened. He looked up and out, blinking through the shock. He didn’t believe it. He’d read it wrong. He started from the beginning again, mouth twisting as the words revealed themselves to remain unchanged.

It took everything within him to keep going.

_I’ve met up with someone trustworthy. I can’t give you their name, but I’ve given you a way to meet them, if that’s what you decide to do. They can help you find your brothers._

Rex’s vision blurred. Tears slipped from his eyes. R7 cooed solemnly, nudged his arm.

_I’m so sorry, Rex. Know that I’ve missed you everyday since we said goodbye. I wished we’d had more time. Don’t mourn me too much._

At the bottom of the screen was a date, a set of coordinates, and her by now familiar sign off,

_Good luck, and may the Force be with you._

Rex dropped the holo-pad. His face fell into his hands. He heaved, no air filling his lungs. He bit his bottom lip to keep from crying out. He’d lost her. Everything they’d been through and now...

Far above him, a convor cawed.

Rex blinked, looked up...

Through his tears, he found Morai fly in one full circle above the AT-TE before swooping across the plain to the Y-wing, lowering herself down atop the pilots domed viewport.

Morai called to him again once settled, more urgent than before...

... and Rex knew, in that moment, that Ahsoka wasn’t gone. Not yet. Not if he acted and acted _now_.

”Let’s go, R7.” Rex said, voice wrecked but resolve sharpening as he pushed himself to his feet, “Ahsoka’s gotten herself into some kind of trouble.”

 _Rescue!_ R7 chirped.

Rex sniffed, wiped away what was left of his tears. He picked up the fallen holo-pad, dusting the salt from its surface as he memorized the coordinates.

 _Core world,_ he realized grimly, brows lowering, _closer to the heart of the Empire than I’d care to be_. That’s where she was sending him. Sighing deeply, Rex started on foot to the Y-wing. R7 followed quickly behind.

”Rescue.” Rex agreed, and Morai took to her wings, flying up and disappearing through the few, sparse clouds that blotted the blue sky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I watched the finale. I cried my eyes out. Some part of me kept thinking the show would end on a positive note, despite the despairing situation. Regardless of it’s sad conclusion, I’m so glad that Rex and Ahsoka had each other through to the end. Their friendship is beautiful, and the thought of them splitting up now seems unfathomable. But it happened, and it’s even more heartbreaking. Both of them were just children, and the way they look so vulnerable and uncertain by the end really highlights that. Their entire world is no more, and though we know their futures turned out (relatively) okay, I couldn’t stop thinking about how they must have felt in those final moments of the Clone War, not sure of anything, uncertain as to their futures, wondering if they’d ever be safe and happy again.
> 
> Thank you The Clone Wars for everything. You made my childhood happier for existing.
> 
> If anyone wants to talk about the show or the characters or the season finale, I’m more than happy to discuss with you!
> 
> Good luck, and May the Force be with You.
> 
> (also, Filoni can pry R7 out of my cold, dead hands. As far as I’m concerned, that little droid survived and is still roaming the galaxy working odd jobs for Ahsoka and Rex.)


	5. Retrospect

Ahsoka wasn’t certain as to what she’d expected to happen next, but it certainly hadn’t been _this._

Herself, standing awkwardly in the center of what had once been an Initiate training room, a group of tailors and seamstresses hurriedly taking her measurements, cataloging them and filing them away for future use. Anakin, observing from the sidelines with arms crossed, reeking impatience.

“You terrify them.” Ahsoka noted later, sitting on one of the many med-bed’s that lined the wall of the medical facility, chagrined to find that her feet _still_ dangled inches from the floor.

Apparently, in all the time she’d been away, she hadn’t grown much in height at all.

The doctor attending to her had all but run out when they’d finished with the physical, rushing through their tasks same as the tailors and seamstresses had. Anakin hadn’t always been the most patient of people, but _seriously_. This was getting out of hand. His presence alone was enough to provoke their fears and anxiety.

Considering what atrocities he’d committed on Raada, though, Ahsoka knew she shouldn’t be surprised.

“Their fear ensures their loyalty.” Anakin responded perfunctorily. Spoken more like wrote-memory; someone else had said those words to him. He was merely repeating, echoing. _One guess_ , Ahsoka thought derisively, _as to who put such a thought in his head._

Ahsoka regarded Anakin, his suit and all its specifics. She had so many questions, but settled for asking the most pressing of them all...

”What happens now?”

The doctor had come and gone, taking with them her blood and saliva samples to run tests. Now, she and Anakin were alone, and the quiet broken by the hiss of his breathing apparatus was all that filled the room.

Anakin said nothing for a lengthy amount of time, seemingly mulling something over. He’d had his moments of quiet introspection in the past, so this behavior did not bother nor particularly worry her. She could recall with stunning clarity all the times, especially in the earliest days of her apprenticeship, when she’d looked up at him and wondered what he was thinking.

 _Some things never change,_ she supposed.

”Master?” Ahsoka asked, the term slipping past her lips like the force-of-habit it was. Realizing too late what she’d said and that she couldn’t take it back, Ahsoka bit her tongue and turned away. For lack of intent or purpose, however, that single word seemed to do the trick. Anakin snapped out of his reverie, approached her side from the shadows he’d swathed himself in upon arrival and said,

”There is something I must attend to.”

And with no further warning or preamble, he made his way for the exit, cape billowing out behind him. For one terrible, ephemeral moment, panic seized Ahsoka. Despite his having turned to the dark side and committing atrocities against the citizens of Raada, the thought of Anakin disappearing on her now, in the middle of whatever was happening - and she hated to admit it - frightened her.

”You’re _leaving_?” She asked, wishing she’d held her tongue as soon as the petulant tone of her own voice reached her ears. Anakin stopped in his tracks before the door, turned and said, almost _appeasingly_ , 

”I will send an attended to your aid. They will escort you. Wait here.”

He started forward again. The doors to the infirmary parted for him. In the threshold he stopped once more to add, as if in afterthought,

”And _stay out_ of trouble.”

Then he was gone, disappearing around the corner as the door closed shut behind him. The idea of escaping came instantly, sent Ahsoka straight to her feet. She’d grown up in this Temple, knew its every passage and corridor. If anyone could find a way out, even with the changes and the security it had unquestionably undergone, she knew _she_ could. Besides, she’d busted out of a prison before.

 _But that was only because someone wanted you to,_ she reminded herself grimly.

It was with a great deal of reluctance that Ahsoka sat back down.

Minutes ticked by. The doctor finally filed back into the room, the tense line of their shoulders dropping when they realized Anakin was gone - but only a little.

”You’re in perfect health.” They informed timidly, not quite meeting her eye. Ahsoka realized she was scowling and worked to neutralize her expression. She didn’t need to give these people anymore reason to feel anxious. Anakin was scary enough in that get-up as was. “Though I recommend rest. You’re suffering from acute exhaustion.”

”Thank you.” Ahsoka said, as sincerely as she could given the situation. The doctor faltered, caught off guard by her words.

She didn’t know if the palace staff had a choice in the matter of working directly beneath the Emperor. Outside of the Imperial Navy, Storm Troopers and the Red Guard, she suspected it had been a matter of choosing between life or death when being recruited. Their fear was palpable.

She _knew_ it fed Sidious.

The doctor nodded stiffly, asked equally as stiffly, “May I be of any other service, Lady Inquisitor?”

Ahsoka resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

”No.” She sighed, not bothering to correct or even dispute that title. Her gut instincts told her that it was probably best to just roll with the punches - for now. “You’re dismissed.”

The doctor practically fell over in their scramble to get away, the door opening and closing behind them in the blink of an eye.

Alone once again, Ahsoka didn’t know what to do with herself. Anakin had told her to wait, and though it was the very _last_ thing she wanted to do, she felt it was best to listen to him until she could formulate a plan. Not for escape - she’d annexed that for the time being - but for something even riskier.

Based on everything she knew about Galactic history, it was always easier to topple a regime from the inside out.

It’s what Sidious had done, after all. Who was to say she couldn’t do the same?

”Pardon the intrusion.” Came a hoarse, almost amused voice then, snapping her out of her train of thought. She turned to find an elderly man with a long, aged face stood in the threshold. He wore a long, dark robe with a well fitted hood. His eyes were as dark as the void of space. When her own eyes lighted upon him, he smiled almost secretively.

”Lady Inquisitor.” He bowed deeply as he addressed her, “My name is Vaneé. I am Lord Vader’s personal attendant. It is my understanding that I am to escort you to the Works district.”

Ahsoka frowned, suspicious.

”Come, Lady Inquisitor.” Vaneé beckoned, “Let us make haste. It will not do either of us well to invoke the Master’s wrath.”

Seeing as she had no other options, Ahsoka reluctantly did as bid.

* * *

Ahsoka had never had reason to step foot into the Industrialized zone. Being a Jedi had given her a privileged, if sheltered, life. She’d grown up knowing only that many businesses had forfeit manufacturing when the cost of occupying ground grew too high. Seeing this sector of Coruscant up close now, knowing one part of the planet and it’s people had to suffer through the noxious smoke and fumes that pumped into and polluted the already artificial air, Ahsoka didn’t have to wonder why it’d gone unchecked by the Jedi for crime, corruption and - as it was being made known to her - the headquarters for disillusioned Force wielders.

”Lord Vader oversees the Inquisitors personally.” Vaneé informed as their shuttle passed through a vat of smoke. Coming out on the other side, Ahsoka made out their destination; the only skyscraper for miles, the only one fully intact.

”You’ve met them?” Ahsoka questioned, wary as the droid-pilot set them down inside the buildings hangar.

”Not in person, no.” Vaneé croaked, “In fact, you are the first.”

Ahsoka didn’t know how to respond to that. Had she lived up to his expectations? She shook her head. It didn’t matter; she _wasn’t_ an Inquisitor - _whatever_ that was - and never would be.

Not if it was what Sidious wanted.

The sun was setting; the day was almost over. If she was lucky, maybe she could finally get some rest.

No such luck. Anakin already waited on the hangar.

”Follow me.” He said once the shuttle door opened, sounding aggrieved. He waited for her descent. She stepped down without a word, and they fell into near synchronized step. Despite his long stride and her increasingly tired state, she kept his pace with ease.

”This all a bit unsettling.” Ahsoka confessed, though she realized it was likely that he already knew how she felt and didn’t care. “Who are the Inquisitors, exactly? How am I being indoctrinated?”

”... It was not my wish, you being here.” Anakin spoke tersely, hands at his sides fists. He was angry, but not at her - rather the situation. “This is my Master’s bidding, however. His vision is absolute.”

” _Why_?” Ahsoka questioned, failing to notice the way his fists curled evermore tightly. “You don’t want me here. _I_ certainly don’t want to be here. It’s not like you haven’t defied a direct order before.”

”... If you are to survive here, you would do well to listen to and obey my every word.”

”I can handle myself.” She reminded him.

After all, she’d been handling herself for years, even before she’d left the Order. Though Anakin’s refusal to see it, she knew, had never been a conscious effort on his part.

Her words of reassuring however did not have the desired effect. No sooner had they left her mouth did Anakin whirl on her. Jabbing pointed finger, words so terse and threatening that she reeled back-

”Your defiance might have been allocated by Skywalker in the past, _encouraged_ even.” He spat, voice raising with every word, “But here it is different. Your Master is _no more_ , and it is imperative you realize this before we further our sojourn into the walls of this building. If you defy me here, I will not hold back. _I will not hesitate_. Among the Inquisitors, you are but a mere _weapon_.”

Ahsoka stared into his helmet, stunned speechless. She felt like a youngling again, being chastened by the Initiate leader. No words to speak, she could only settle for one tense, curt nod. Anakin breathed hard, chest plate expanding with his every breath. On the surface, it was clear he was angry, but after a suspenseful, stifling moment in which neither of them so much as shifted, Ahsoka finally realized there was more to it. He was...

 _... terrified_.

She didn’t dare move, didn’t dare reach out to him. She had a moment of clarity, standing in the hangar bay - he was acting _insane_. What she was trying to _accomplish_ was insane. Those who fell to the dark side, in her experience, rarely ever came back from it. Ventress might have been the exception, but she’d also been self-serving. Her aiding in finding the real culprit behind the Temple bombing had only occurred _after_ Ahsoka had found a way to spin the desired outcome in the former assassin’s favor.

Would this be true of Anakin? Would she only be able to appeal to his sentiments now by compromising? She’d have to find a way to show him that her _not_ embracing the darkness would be for his benefit. Unbidden, the words of a vision years past came, reminding her,

” _There are many contradictions in you, and in him._ ”

 _We are alike_ , she conceded to herself, _which means his capacity for good is just as real as my capacity for..._

“... seeds _of the dark side, planted by your Master.”_

Ahsoka sighed. Like Anakin, she struggled with attachments. Letting go was, she realized only then, _easy._ Holding on...

” _Do you feel it?_ ”

Holding on was _so_ much more difficult.

“I won’t leave you.” She whispered, reassuring, understanding. “Not this time.”

Anakin - no, _Vader_ \- lowered his arm.

”You’re still holding out hope for your fallen Master.” He intoned, contemptuous.

”It’s the only reason I’m here.” She agreed. He splayed his hand across her shoulder and guided her into the building. Quietly she continued, “I believe, against my better judgement, that there’s still good left in you. I realize you have a part to play, here. You forget that I’ve played parts before, too. If this is how I survive, then I can do that. For both of our sakes, I can go along - to a degree.”

Vader said nothing, but as they fully exited the hangar and entered the belly of the beast, there was just a moments hesitation; a hiccup in his gate, a falter in his step...

Ahsoka only pretended that she hadn’t notice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this AU has officially become a challenge to see how many chapter titles I can make starting with the letter R


	6. Retrogression

“I realize what you’d meant, now.”

“... Elaborate.”

Ahsoka held her lightsaber - the very same one she’d discarded at the clones’ graves on that moon - in her hand. Vader had bestowed it upon her not but a moment after escorting her to her room, a windowless square with a single closet, refresher and bedroll. She was reluctant to ignite it, knowing his penchant for ‘ _fine-tuning_.’

“Needing to attend to something.” Ahsoka grimaced, fingers curling around the hilt.

She closed her eyes, reached out in the Force for the kyber crystal. Where it had started singular, the addition of the shoto at Anakin’s recommendation had accustomed it to having a friend. She remembered, distantly, the song they sang during the war was a thrumming, battle-drumming beat. Now, this crystal was pulseless, calling out in vain for its other half. It no longer sang for her.

 _I’m so sorry_ , Ahsoka thought, knuckles whitening from the strain of her grip. _This is all my fault. I separated you when I should have kept you together._

”You didn’t look for the other?” She asked Vader, finally opening her eyes.

”One was confirmation. Two would have been overkill. I’d found what I’d come for.”

”And what was that?”

His lack of an answer was answer enough. Ahsoka allowed herself a moment to feel even worse than she already had. She’d asked him if he’d understood how it had felt for her, thinking he’d died. Holding her old lightsaber in her hand, realizing what its being there meant, she knew that he _did_. 

_He was the reason the bond was broken in the first place,_ she reminded herself scathingly. _Don’t empathize with the one who inflicted the damage._

”If you’re waiting for a _thank you_ ,” Ahsoka said, gesturing at the saber with a nod, “Then you should make yourself comfortable. You’re going to be waiting for a long time.”

“You want to pick a fight.” Vader observed, too calmly for her taste. “That will come tomorrow. For now, rest. Save your strength and hone in on those feelings of anger and resentment for the trials ahead.”

Ahsoka’s nostrils flared. She scowled as Vader extended his gloved hand, a silent demand to be given it back. She slapped the lightsaber down in his palm. He barely reacted. Incensed, Ahsoka turned away. She could feel herself getting worked up. Was it a side-effect of being in such a vile place, or was it truly how she was feeling, how she was reacting? She couldn’t be sure, and she didn’t care; she just wanted to feel like _herself_ again. Deciding she wouldn’t give Vader the satisfaction of receiving her spite, Ahsoka turned back around to tell him to leave...

... only to find that he was already gone.

Frowning, Ahsoka approached the door of the room. It was closed, and no sensors activated at her approach. She tried the access panel on the wall, pressed the ‘open’ key vigorously. The door didn’t budge a single bit. Ahsoka scoffed - she was _trapped_. He’d _locked_ her inside.

Her anger threatened to rise all over again, but the exhaustion from before returned full force. Ahsoka touched her forehead to the door. Eyes fluttering closed, she slid down...

... and woke up pressed against the wall, the sound of a buzzer filling the room.

” _Lady Inquisitor._ ” Came a voice through the panel’s intercom. Ahsoka rubbed her face, got to her feet. Allowing herself a moment to grasp her bearings, she leaned against the wall. Thoughts raced through her head, reminding her of all that had occurred...

The buzzing came again.

” _Lady Inquisitor...?_ ” The voice over the intercom spoke again, less certain. Ahsoka frowned. Something about the sound of that voice...

”Yes?” Ahsoka responded, finger pressed to the intercom key.

” _Forgive the interruption, Lady Inquisitor._ ” The voice responded, the lilt of it rising and falling like low tide. Ahsoka’s heart did something strange, seemed at once to drop out of her chest and catapult into her throat. “ _I’ve been assigned by Lord Vader to be your personal attendant. I have your uniform.”_

Ahsoka stepped away from the intercom. There was no viewport in the door. She couldn’t see the owner of the voice, but a wall only hid so much in the Force.

” _If... if now is an inconvenient time...”_ The voice came through the speaker again, hesitant, “ _Then_ _perhaps I can-_ ”

Ahsoka hit the access panel, not sure if it would work - but to her surprise, it gave. The door slipped into the side of the wall, revealing the one who stood on its other side to be none other than...

” _Barriss_?” Ahsoka asked faintly.

Barriss, gaze cast down, looked slowly up. She was gaunt, face swallow, eyes weary - but it was _her_. Ahsoka inhaled sharply.

“... Ah- Ahsoka?” Barriss asked, brows pulling together. She held a stack of obsidian clothes in her hands, a helmet sitting on the top. She dropped everything when their eyes met, and the helmet went skittering. Ahsoka’s eyes dropped to Barriss’s arms, found clunky, metal braces on either one that stretched from wrist to elbow. _Force inhibitors_ , she realized numbly. Barriss took an unsteady step forward...

Ahsoka took two back.

Barriss paused, her stunned expression faltering...

“What are _you_ doing here?” Ahsoka asked, voice a sharp hiss. She shifted her stance, preparing for a fight. Barriss’s eyes shuttered. She lowered herself to the floor, began retrieving the clothes she’d dropped in her shock...

Reticently she began, “Lord Vader has-”

”Not _why_ are you here.” Ahsoka cut her off, frustrated, “I meant... what are you doing _alive_?

Barriss’s eyes flashed so much hurt, Ahsoka almost regretted asking so coldly.

 _Almost_.

”I...” Barriss began, grappling. She picked up the helmet by its mechanical straps. She was shaking, gasping. She was on the verge, Ahsoka registered, of a panic attack. “That’s a... _long_ story...”

”Then you _better_ start _explaining_.” Ahsoka bit, staring her down. Barriss looked up at her in distress, faintly nodded...

”Let me just...” She let go of the clothes she’d begun folding, clutched her chest. She leaned on one hand, closed her eyes and worked on just breathing. Ahsoka watched, conflicted. She was torn between a place of contempt and bafflement. She didn’t know how she felt about seeing Barriss alive, looking so starved and scared and _sad_.

”Where should I start?” Barriss asked, the laugh she let out overwrought. Despite knowing she’d asked the question of herself, Ahsoka answered through clenched teeth,

” _Exactly_ where we left off. You’d confessed to the bombing.”

Barriss gulped, tucked her legs beneath herself and placed her hands atop her lap. She rubbed a nervous thumb over the skin of her palm and started,

”After I was escorted away, I was imprisoned. I fully expected to die. I kept waiting for the trial that would find me guilty. Only it never came. Months passed, I think. I lost track of time, in my cell. One day...”

She took a deep breath, again risked meeting Ahsoka’s derisory eyes.

”One day, the clones stationed at my cell... they suddenly turned to me. I felt this... _shift_. They tried to kill me, but it was like I knew what was coming even before it happened. They deactivated the ray shield and fired at me. I managed to escape. I got as far as the roof when...”

The next part she struggled with, as if she couldn’t quite believe it, as if she wasn’t sure Ahsoka would believe it, either.

”When I made it to the roof, I saw the Temple in the distance. It was billowing smoke. I couldn’t make sense of what was happening, I just felt so much _loss_. I tried to reach them-”

Ahsoka laughed derisively. Barriss gaped, searching her face.

”After what you did to all of those citizens and Jedi? After what you did to _me_?” Ahsoka grit, “You really expect me to believe you tried to _help_ them?”

Barriss’s lips slammed shut. She looked away. In the low light, something glimmered down her face. 

Ahsoka faltered. It was a tear.

”I know taking my word for it isn’t going to be easy, Ahsoka.” Barriss murmured, “But I’ve changed.”

“You’re right.” Ahsoka said. Barriss looked up at her, expression edging on relief. Ahsoka scowled, continued, “It _isn’t_ easy for me, taking your word for it.”

”... For what it’s worth.” Barriss sniffed, wiping away her stray tear, “I’m glad to see you’re alive.”

”Says the woman who tried to have me _killed_.”

”I didn’t have a choice!” Barriss blurted, frenzied. No sooner had the words left her mouth did she slam a palm over her lips. Ahsoka frowned, questioned lowly,

” _What do you mean?_ ”

”I... I’ve said too much.” Barriss spoke through her fingers, looking iller than she had when she’d arrived. She finished folding the clothes and presented them to Ahsoka, head bowed in supplication.

Ahsoka turned her nose up in disgust, turned away.

”Leave them on the floor and get out of my sight.” Ahsoka instructed, her voice so chilling it shocked even her. Barriss flinched back, stood slowly, said quietly,

”I will do as you ask, but I was instructed to inform you to wear the clothes that I’ve brought.”

”And if I _don’t_?” Ahsoka asked harshly.

”... Then I could suffer the consequences.” Barriss sighed, “Though, I realize that doesn’t matter to you.”

She laughed without humor, said scornfully, “I can’t even _blame_ you.”

Ahsoka frowned, almost turned back...

But Barriss departed without another word, the door slinking shut behind her.

Ahsoka fumed. She paced the tiny room, attempted to reign in her feelings of anger. Vader had done this on _purpose_. He’d assigned Barriss to be her attendant to make her uncomfortable and get her riled up. His cruelty was unique in its delivery, she’d give him that - she just didn’t think he would go so far as he had.

Not with her.

 _You aren’t an exception to his brutality_ , Ahsoka reminded herself, lowering to inspect the dark materials. _Vader’s already made that_ very _clear_.

Not wanting to delay the inevitable, Ahsoka gathered the clothes in her hands and stepped into the refresher. After a quick shower, she discarded her old clothes and stepped into the new. She didn’t mourn the outfit she knew she was likely to never see again, once she departed her room for the day. Though wearing it had been her choice, growing up a Jedi had meant she’d learned fairly quickly to never become personally attached to anything material.

It was easy, in the end, to fold up her past life once again and set it aside.

The clothes Barriss had left behind were uncomplicated, basic: a slim, armored suit, combat boots that reached to mid thigh and gloves that reached to the elbows - all black, embossed with gadgets and imperial insignia. Layering the suit was a simple tunic-tabard hybrid that stretched, uninterrupted, from shoulder to shoulder but not chest to back. The tabard fell just below her knees down the front and back of the suit and was topped off by the utility belt around her waist. Everything fit perfectly. Ahsoka inspected the last piece...

The helmet.

It was opaque, obsidian metal - somewhat similar to Vader’s - and it hooked over the ridge between her montrals and stretched in sections down her lekku, cuffing beneath her back and side lek same as the Padawan beads attached to her headdress had, once upon a time. Fastened there, she let the rest of it click into place. Once entombed inside, Ahsoka viewed herself in the refresher mirror through the thin slat that sat before her eyes. _I look like an assassin_ , she thought. _Perhaps that is what they’re trying to make me_.

On the side of the helmet was a button. Ahsoka pressed it and the front retracted up and around her face in a frame. Ahsoka would have admired the functionality of it, she knew, had she not been so perturbed by the increasingly abhorrent events happening around her.

* * *

The door gave again. _Must be timed_ , she thought, _to not let me out until..._ whatever _time it is_.

Barriss stood in the hall, head lowered, braced arms folded before her, waiting.

”Why are you still here?” Ahsoka asked, unable to keep the bite out of her voice.

”I’m your attendant.” Barriss informed, voice biting back, much to Ahsoka’s astonishment. “Whether you like it or not, I’ve been ordered at your side.”

Ahsoka regarded the one she’d once considered a close friend with calculating eyes; she hadn’t had many of them, within the walls of the Temple. Though it wasn’t a point of pride, Ahsoka wasn’t too humbled to admit that she knew she’d been better than most of the Initaites her age, making her somewhat of an outsider among them. Despite the loneliness she’d sometimes felt as a youngling, being appointed by the Council as Anakin Skywalker’s Padawan had more than made up for it. Her advanced abilities had ultimately solidified her a place at his side.

Her age, she conceded, might have also played a key factor, as many didn’t become a Padawan _until_ they were of Anakin’s age. Assigning him someone at or above his age would have been... _awkward_ , though, to say the least.  
  
Still, out of every Initiate in the Temple, the Council had chosen _her_. The gravity of their decision had never escaped her, and she’d fought tooth and nail to prove to Anakin that she could stand at his side. And making friends wasn’t so difficult, after becoming his apprentice - he was someone who’d understood, perhaps even better than her, what it was like to be at once revered and ostracized. Barriss, despite being nearly the same age as Anakin, had been so easy to get along and find common ground with. And so Ahsoka had placed misguided trust in her, thinking theirs’ was a connection that could last a lifetime.

 _That’s what you get for being naive_ , Ahsoka thought.

“You aren’t really one of them, are you?”

Ahsoka turned her attention back to Barriss, who looked at her in barely refrained terror.

”No.” Ahsoka said, understanding she’d referred to the Inquisitors. “I was forced here against my will.”

Barriss confessed, shoulders sagging minimally in relief, “I’m surprised that they didn’t kill you. It was my understanding that most of the Jedi had been wiped out. It’s... the purpose of the Inquisitors, to kill the last remaining Jedi.”

”I’m not a Jedi.” Ahsoka said, gaze lowering. Unsettled by that which Barriss had just revealed, Ahsoka gulped. She crossed her arms and continued, forcing the tremor out of her words, “I left the Order.”

Barriss’s eyes widened in alarm.

”You... left? They didn’t accept you back?”

”They did. I just decided I didn’t want to return.”

” _But_ -”

”Your impassioned speech in court resonated with me.” Ahsoka practically snarled, “And isn’t that what you wanted?”

She gestured to herself, at the hall and the world around them at large. Voice rising she continued,

”Isn’t all of _this_ what you wanted?”

Barriss flinched away.

”None of this...” She whispered, voice breaking, “ _None of this_ is what I wanted, Ahsoka.”

Ahsoka faltered. Her arms fell back to her sides...

At the end of the hall, a door opened. Vader stepped swiftly through, boots thudding and cape billowing. Ahsoka didn’t miss the way Barriss stiffened at his approach, the way she bowed her head and stepped several paces back as he stopped before them.

”You’re late.” Vader intoned.

”I was busy.” Ahsoka said. Barriss stiffened further.

”So it seems.” Vader responded, looking between them. His voice lacked inflection, but Ahsoka sensed his disgruntlement.

”Did you forget your objective?” He asked of Barriss.

”Forgive me, Lord Vader.” Barriss said hurriedly, voice barely above a whisper. She refused to look at him. “I apologize for the delay, I meant no-”

”It was my fault.” Ahsoka interrupted, exasperated. She ignored the aghast glance Barriss shot her way and continued, “And if you were going to retrieve me yourself, why send Barriss?”

”I needn’t expend energy explaining my choices.” He inclined his head, thinly concealed irritation in his tone, “Besides, I think you know.”

With that, Vader turned on his heel and marched away, gesturing with his hand for her to follow.

Ahsoka spared Barriss one last, long look before she fell into step beside him.

”It appears you don’t hold grudges.” She noted sarcastically as they entered the lift at the end of the hall. “You wanted me angry, but now I’m only curious. Why is Barriss here?”

”I’m surprised she didn’t tell you.” Vader replied, all but punching the panel. The lift doors shut, carried them down. “After she survived the purge, my Master foresaw she would be of more use to his cause alive than dead, and so she remains.”

”I can sense you aren’t thrilled about that.” Ahsoka observed.

”... If the decision of her fate had been left to me,” Vader rumbled, “Offee would not be alive, today.”

Ahsoka almost shivered at his leveled threat.

”Well, for better or worse, she _is_ alive.” Ahsoka huffed, “And you can’t hold a grudge against her if you’re going to use her to get under my skin.”

Vader turned slightly in her direction.

”You have sympathy for the one who betrayed you?” He questioned lowly.

”I’m here having a civil conversation with him, aren’t I?”  
  
Vader made a sound akin to a sigh, redirected his gaze on the doors that parted not a moment after. Together they stepped out, ventured a short hall that led to a balcony overlooking an ovacular room. A training arena, Ahsoka discerned, peering over the parapet, watching a group of individuals in outfits just a few degrees different from her own wielding double edged, red sabers.

Behind her, Vader shifted. Ahsoka turned back to find him procuring her saber from his belt. He’d had it clipped beside his own. He offered it over. Ahsoka took it without reluctance. She knew what this exchange meant, what it signified and asserted about herself in relation to the Dark Lord. It wasn’t the simple act it had been before, when she’d departed for Mandalore with the 332nd. It wasn’t the thoughtfulness of a Master looking out for his apprentice. This was a Dark Lord of the Sith weaponizing his weapon, forcing her into a slaughter. She knew she’d never kill for him, but she could survive. It’s what Bail had believed and distilled in her, after all.

 _You saved yourself_ , _and there’s far more you can do alive than you could do dead_.

”One more thing...” Vader said, waving his hand over her face. The helmet slid down her features, effectively obscuring them from view. Ahsoka perceived him through the thin viewport with wariness.

”Is this necessary?” She asked, gesturing to the mask, nearly recoiling at the grating sound of her voice through the helmet’s modulator. Her words were almost too garbled to comprehend. Somehow, however, Vader understood her - both words and meaning.

He responded carefully, “I would prefer you not reveal your face until you’ve bested them in combat.”

Ahsoka nearly smirked at his assertion, but his next words caused the expression to prematurely die.

”Now, ignite your saber and _fight_.”

Ahsoka hesitated. She hadn’t wielded her lightsaber in more than a year, her last real combat situation involving Maul. And he’d disarmed her, _twice_. She looked into the crowd of masked red-blades. There were twelve in total, all ranging in size and speed. Hidden as they were, she couldn’t gauge their age but she could gauge their skill. She observed which aspects each succeeded and failed at, assessing for ways she could obtain the upper hand. Still, she didn’t dare underestimate any of them. The moment overconfidence captured one in battle was the moment that spelled their doom.

Far below, one took notice of her trepidation. A Pau’an who stood apart from the rest, as he was the only one not engaging in combat and... the only one _not_ wearing a helmet. She looked down at him, watched as he scrutinized her, assessing.

Without any further delay, Ahsoka threw herself over the railing and landed in a crouch in the center of the room. All of the Inquistors, save for the Pau’an, forfeit their previous endeavors to turn their blades on her. She ignited her saber, watched it spring to slow life. It’s shade was the same insidious red as all the rest.

” _Inqusitors_.” Vader bellowed from above, “The trial of the Thirteenth Sister begins.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wondering what Barriss meant by THAT line?? rest assured it will be explained later on (as well as Barriss backstory!)
> 
> \+ I don’t actually know if there was any kind of formal “introduction” to the Inquisition as I’ve portrayed it to be here (it appeared Sidious pretty much hand picked people, or forced them into the role) but it seemed unfitting that there wouldn’t be some kind of competition aspect to be indoctrinated - especially in Ahsoka’s case. If you’re curious about the Inquisitors, I’ve included the links to all I’ve thought is pertinent information. Thank you for reading!!
> 
> [Inquisitors1](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Inquisitorius)
> 
> [Inquisitors2](https://www.cbr.com/star-wars-every-imperial-inquisitor-canon/amp/)
> 
> [Inquisitors3](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Inquisitorius_Headquarters)


	7. Revelation

The first to lock their blade with her own, Ahsoka later learned, was the one known as the Sixth Brother. His attack was a frenzied, ferocious portrayal. Ahsoka saw through the fighting style meant to distract immediately and was undeterred, but something else captured her attention: the crystals within his saber sang to her - a vibrant, rhythmic trill. She wanted to reach out, to take from the Inquisitor what longed to be with her. But the timing wasn’t right, and she knew not what the consequences of such an action would be.

Ahsoka settled instead for disarming and incapacitating.

One came after the next, all of them swiping mindlessly with their blades, lashing out like they’d never held a saber before in their life. It reminded her far too much of Ventress and Grevious, the way their sabers spun and stabbed in such senseless a manner. Ahsoka had to wonder if their lack of technique was a direct result of turning to the dark side. She knew not each individuals origins, but she suspected they’d been Jedi. Or, at the very least, training to _be_ Jedi.

The fight, despite being deceptively easy, was not a fair one. Eleven on one - for the Pau’an had yet to partake - no matter their skill or lack thereof, was exceedingly difficult to keep up with. Ahsoka was sweating and her heart was pounding by the time she‘d managed to incapacitate seven of them. That left four, the Pau’an still hanging back. Ahsoka risked a glance at Vader who observed impartially from above. He didn’t seem too particularly bothered that they hadn’t stepped in, so she chose to ignore them for the time being.

”You’re good.” The one she’d come to know as the Second Sister commented, almost appraisal in her voice. “I recognize your fighting style.”

They sparred, parried, twisted. Unlike the others, Second Sister’s aggression wasn’t mindless. What she lacked in brutality she made up for with strategy. She’d said she’d recognized Ahsoka’s fighting, which meant she also recognized its weaknesses.

Luckily for Ahsoka, she’d had more than one Master.

Switching from form V to form III didn’t catch the Inquisitor off-guard as much as she’d hoped for, but it resulted in the desired outcome, regardless. The Inquisitor wore themselves down trying to get her back into a more offensive battle. When one swipe exposed her flank, Ahsoka sent her sprawling with a shove through the Force. Her body hit the opposite wall of the training arena with a sickening crack. Ahsoka winced, turned to her next opponent and tried not to think of the damage she’d undoubtedly inflicted.

Though Anakin had taught Ahsoka how to take on opponents much larger than herself, she’d never had to oppose someone quite as towering as the next opponent. The one she’d come to recognize as Ninth Sister was massive, with a height to rival even Vader’s, Ahsoka suspected; and she used her strength and size to her advantage. Ahsoka managed to evade her strikes for the first minute, rolling around and between her legs, flipping back or up and behind her body. When she tried landing a kick on the bend of her knee, the Inquisitor grabbed Ahsoka by her ankle and flung her, one handed, across the room.

” _Little Togruta_.” The Inquisitor mocked, pinning her to the ground with a knee. She knocked her lightsaber out of her hand, sent it sailing. Ahsoka kicked and beat against the Inquisitor’s leg, tried to get her own legs under her chest to push her off - but it didn’t work. The Ninth Sister bore her weight down, crushing...

Ahsoka struggled to breathe, saw stars...

 _Focus_ , Ahsoka chanted inwardly. _The Force is with you. Reach out for your fallen saber_.

Shooting out a hand, the lightsaber smacked into her palm.

But it was not, she realized only after she stabbed the Ninth Sister in the shoulder, the one Vader had bestowed.

It was the one belonging to an _Inquisitor_.

The Ninth Sister roared, jumped back. Ahsoka used her momentary surprise to free herself, rolled back onto her feet and disarmed her opponent in the manner Anakin had once taught her, twisting her saber round and round the other until it flew up and away. Realizing quickly that disarming this opponent would only delay so much, and that the Force would not be enough to dislodge her attacks, Ahsoka took the double bladed monstrosity she’d unintentionally called to her aid and added insult to injury. With a snarled grunt, Ahsoka drove one end of the blade deeper down into the Ninth Sister’s flesh, letting it sink until the Inquisitor passed out from the pain.

Ahsoka didn’t have time to worry about the savagery of her attack, for the others were on her in an instant; but their reluctance was evident in the way they skittered back after every swing.

Ahsoka took them down within minutes.

Only one remained. He flew at her the moment she’d taken out the last, not allowing her a second to catch her breath.

”I know who you are.” The Pau’un leaned in close, their blades locking, voice only loud enough for her to hear. “I was there for your trial. I ripped the Padawan beads _right off_ your head.”

Ahsoka flinched back, lightsaber screeching off his own. The Pau’an’s blade swept down, and then he was on her again, stride slow, leering.

He circled her like a predator. Ahsoka growled low in her throat, taking on a stance years forgotten but still familiar. This was muscle memory; this was hunting the Akul. This Inquisitor had _no idea_ who he was challenging, and still he activated the mechanism that spun the blades round and round.

”I’m surprised at your eagerness to fight me.” Ahsoka said, the modulator making her words so much more radular. She gestured with a tilt of her head to the prone Inquisitors sprawled around them, some of whom were finally waking from unconsciousness.

”Changing the subject so you don’t have to relive the memories?” The Pau’an questioned.

”No.” Ahsoka smirked, “Just needed to keep you flapping your jaws a little longer.”

And then she struck out. Her free hand curved around the hilt of his blades, and his shock prevented him from having time enough to react or counter before she forced the sabers back into their base. The lightsabers retracted, Ahsoka spread her feet and used her center of balance and his unrelenting hold to flip him over her head. He released his hilt, and she activated it for herself, used it to pin him where he lie, stunned, to the ground.

”You’re _beaten_.” Ahsoka panted. The Inquisitor bared his fanged teeth, attempted to lunge at her-

Something pushed him down, and his expression went from a senseless rage to a stricken panic. The Pau’an kicked out once, weakly. His hands went to his throat, held there. Ahsoka tracked the movement of his hideous eyes, saw them slide just past her. Keeping the saber at his throat, Ahsoka risked a glance up...

... found Vader with arm extended, fingers curled, at once keeping the Pau’an down and cutting off his air supply.

” _Yield_.” He said, voice striking like thunder. After the ensuing silence that followed his command, he released the Pau’an and jumped into the arena. The Inquisitors who had yet to get to their feet scrambled up, stood at attention...

Ahsoka deactivated the Pau’an’s saber, offered it to him...

He scowled at her, but to her surprise, accepted it delicately, clipping it to some unseen mount on his back. He stood, stepped several paces away a moment after, head bowing as Vader approached her side.

”Inquisitors.” Vader addressed them, gaze sweeping the room. They all retracted their masks, bowed their now bared faces in defeat. Ahsoka discovered, much to her horror, that quite a few of them were young - even more so than her. They couldn’t have been anything other than Padawans, at the most, when the purge commenced. Vader continued, “My disappoint is _supreme_.”

No one dared respond.

Vader continued, “I believe it goes unchallenged that the Thirteenth Sister has proven herself.”

When no one voiced their dissent, Vader retracted her helmet’s plates with only a thought. The mask peeled back against her face, revealing her to the room. Everyone’s eyes landed on her...

Ahsoka felt their shock, familiarity, disbelief...

Their anger, hatred, _fury_...

“There is no question that further _training_ is required.” Vader said.

The Sixth Brother protested, “Her saber’s crystal has been bled, but I do not recognize darkness within her. You’ve brought a _Jedi_ into our ranks, the very beings we’ve sworn to destroy!”

Vader flicked his wrist, and the Sixth Brother jettisoned back, crashing into the wall on a broken gasp.

Vader said, pointing at the Inquisitor as the Sixth struggled to stand once more, “The Thirteenth Sister is _no longer_ a Jedi. Her efforts today have proven what I’ve always suspected: _none_ of you are yet ready to hunt the Jedi. You would have fallen at her blade had she not bestowed you _mercy_.”

”Her _mercy_ is a _Jedi’s_ sentiment!” The Second Sister hissed, clutching her mid-section with one arm, the other limp and dangling at her side. “She hasn’t embraced the darkness. How can she be among us in this way? I do not feel our interests in her spirit-!”

” _Silence_!” The Pau’an roared at them, and somehow the Inquisitors stood more at attention than they already had been. “The time for challenge has passed. The Thirteenth Sister has proven herself in combat, and she has found _us_ lacking.”

“But this is not the natural order of things!” The Second Sister insisted.

The atmosphere tensed considerably. Vader, it seemed, had less control over his _charges_ than he would have liked her to believe.

”Is this the new directive, then?” The one Ahsoka would come to know to be the Seventh Sister, a Mirialan too young to sound as viscous and bloodthirsty as she did, asked. “Whoever kills the former Jedi first is allowed to _hunt_?”

” _No_.” Vader bellowed, threat lacing that single word. “The Emperor requires her alive. It will not be long before she is one of you.”

“She will be tortured, too, then? Isolated and undone?” The Second Sister asked, sneering at her.

Ahsoka nearly balked, but kept her expression smooth and indifferent. Still, her heart raced at the prospect. _Torture? Is that what had happened to the others?_

”Do I need remind you?” Vader moved to the Second Sister in a menacing manner, his voice a terrible rumble, “That I do not answer to you? If you’ve become so bold as to question my methods, perhaps it is time you return to the Chambers you would subject the one who has followed my _every command_ to!”

The Second Sister’s eyes widened with borderline panic. She fell to her knees, shook her head vigorously...

”No! No, please! I won’t... I-I didn’t mean-!”

”By tomorrow evening,” Vader interrupted, callous, “I should have a report that you’ve submitted to the Chambers for further processing. If I don’t have that report, I needn’t explain that the consequences will be _dire_.”

The Second Sister’s lips thinned. She bowed her head, said brokenly, shaking,

” _Yes, Lord Vader_.”

“Training concludes.” Vader announced. He turned to Ahsoka, gestured for her to follow him as he made his brisk walk away from the arena.

Ahsoka scowled, moved to follow when a voice growled,

”Return what you’ve taken, _Sister_.”

Ahsoka turned slowly back around, spotted the one who’d addressed her. _The Sixth Brother._ He looked not at her face but at her hand, seething. She looked down...

 _Right_ , she remembered then at the sight of the saber. His had been the one calling out to her, the one that came at her call in the Force. Wordlessly, reluctantly, she offered it out. When the Sixth Brother refused to move to take it, Ahsoka flung it across the room. It hit him square in the chest; he grabbed it with fumbling hands. Without sparing any of them a second glance, Ahsoka retrieved her old saber from the floor with the Force and promptly turned on her heel, striding to catch up to Vader’s side.

” _Impressive_.” Vader said when they were alone. He held out his hand for the saber. Rolling her eyes, Ahsoka gave it back.

She knew not where he led her, just focused on following his smooth glide with her sudden limp. She looked down, confounded to find a burn slashed across her upper thigh.

”The _Grand_ Inquisitor landed that.” Vader voiced, the way he said ‘Grand’ indicating he thought the title was a farce. “The Pau’an. You fought as if you’d never felt the strike at all.”

”I _didn’t_ feel it.” Ahsoka confessed, but the sight of it brought the stinging sensation. Heat lanced up and down around the wound. She grimaced, “Feeling it now, though.”

Vader said nothing.

”Where are we going?” Ahsoka ventured, gate slowing. She’d never contracted an injury from a lightsaber before. She knew it would scar.

Again, Vader said nothing.

”... One mentioned torture.” Ahsoka said, voice quieting. She gulped - she was no stranger to torture, and though she knew her own resilience, she knew the one ahead of her had determination to spare. Would she be able to withstand whatever that Inquisitor had been so adamant she experience, whatever she herself had gone through - what she would be now forced to go through again?

”... We are headed for the infirmary.” Vader said after a long moment. “Your worries are unfounded.”

Ahsoka couldn’t help her sigh of relief. She picked up her pace, hobbling to return to his side.

* * *

Ahsoka lie propped against a med-bed, a medical droid buzzing above her leg, stitching the skin back together with bacta sutures. _They’ll diffuse into your flesh_ , the resident droid doctor had explained. Ahsoka only nodded. She was coming down from the adrenaline rush of the fight, felt every hit that had been landed on her person. An hour in one of the bacta-tanks lining the wall at the end of the facility would have been preferable to being treated without pain-killers, but they were occupied by the other Inquisitors, and the thought of submitting herself to such a vulnerable position amidst the ones scattered around the room, being treated for their own wounds, felt foolish.

“Vader favors you.” One commented from several beds away. Ahsoka cut her gaze sideways, saw it was the one she’d skewered in the shoulder. A Dowutin, she realized. She was missing an eye.

”You can’t deny it.” She continued, “Where you’re skilled at combat, I’m skilled at perceiving.”

Ahsoka frowned.

”I sense your deep sadness.” The Dowutin continued, “You knew him, before he was what he is now.”

”... What concern of it is yours?” Ahsoka finally challenged, keeping her gaze resolutely forward. Vader wasn’t around now, having departed shortly after dropping her off - Ahsoka knew it was the only reason the Inquisitor spoke so openly.

”None, I suppose.” The Dowutin said, rising to her feet. They approached her, and Ahsoka tensed, ready for a fight...

But all the Dowutin did was offer the arm not residing in a sling. Ahsoka eyed her, uncertain...

”Grasp on, Sister.” The Dowutin said, smirking deviously, “The fighting is over. For now.”

At a loss for what else to do, and knowing refusing could end badly, Ahsoka stretched out her own arm, and the Dowutin clutched her at the elbow in greeting.

Those scattered around the room watched the exchange with unabashed eyes.

”Thirteenth Sister,” Dowutin said, “I am Ninth Sister.”

“Making nice with the _Little Togruta_ , I see.” Said another in a sneer, a voice... slightly unnatural. Ahsoka looked over her shoulder to see the Mirailin girl getting treated for a plumage of bruises Ahsoka had left up the side of her face. Her mask was removed, but her voice was still modulated.

”That’s Seventh Sister.” Ninth Sister said, “She’s a sore loser.”

”Vader taught us to fight offensively!” Seventh defended with a snarl, “I don’t despise her because she beat me, I despise her because she hasn’t been subjected to what the rest of us have.”

”... Vader doesn’t favor me.” Ahsoka said after a tense moment, meeting the Seventh Sister’s glare head on. “The only reason I haven’t been tortured is because his Master needs me for... something else.”

”And what would that be?” Seventh questioned.

”I don’t know.” Ahsoka said, “But even if I did, I wouldn’t tell _you_.”

”Thirteenth,” Seventh said, mock-sympathy in her words, “You don’t yet know how it works here, so let me explain. _Here_ , secrets are eradicated. Ninth might think you’ve got Lord Vader wrapped around your little head tails, but we have _all_ suffered at his hands. Ninth lost an eye. Sixth lost an arm, Fifth a hand.”

She patted her throat with the pads of her fingers, pure hatred in her eyes.

”And _I_ lost my voice. Vader slashed my throat during a combat session. What you’re hearing now is a mechanism fixed inside, meant to replicate. It will only be a matter of time before he takes something from you, too.”

”Seeing as how you expel air when it isn’t necessary...” Ahsoka said, knowing it was harsh but knowing harsh was all that would protect her, “I have to say, I’m surprised he didn’t take it further by cutting out your tongue.”

Seventh bared her teeth, moved as if to attack-

”Relax, Seventh.” Said the Grand Inquisitor. He stood previously to the side of the room, invested in a data-pad, but now strolled, shoulders back, posture impeccable, to Ahsoka’s side. “Best you don’t engage in fights you can’t finish.”

Seventh Sister’s nose wrinkled in anger.

“I must say, however,” Grand Inquisitor mused, addressing Ahsoka, “That your arrival _is_ most unusual. Vader does appear to hold you in certain regard.”

Ahsoka refused to respond. The Grand Inquisitor inclined his head, continued,

”Walk with me, Thirteenth Sister.”

His tone indicated it wasn’t an invitation that could be refused. Reluctantly, Ahsoka slid off the med-bed and limped with him out of the infirmary and into the hall.

”You said you knew who I was.” Ahsoka ventured after they’d put some distance between themselves and the infirmary, “You were a Temple Guard, before.”

”And you were falsely accused.” Grand Inquisitor affirmed. “The one who framed you walks these halls, same as us.”

”But she’s not an Inquisitor same as... _us_.” Ahsoka said, struggling to squash the terrible taste that ‘us’ left behind in her mouth.

The Grand Inquisitor huffed a laugh.

”No,” He said, thankfully ignoring her slip-up, “but that wasn’t for a lack of trying.”

”What do you mean?”

“... Barriss Offee was captured, following the purge. I do not know the details, but I do know the isolation and the torture the Emperor subjected her to had the opposite effect than they’ve had on the others.”

”You imply you didn’t experience the same?”

”I joined with the darkness willingly.” Grand Inquisitor explained simply, “If we are speaking in confidence...?”

”... We are.” Ahsoka agreed begrudgingly.

He continued, ”Then I can tell you that many of the others did not.”

”... I suspected as much.” Ahsoka confessed, “They were... _are_... livid with me.”

”It has been ingrained in them to despise the Jedi.” Grand Inquisitor explained. “Though Lord Vader came to us to explain the... _extenuating_ circumstances of your arrival the night before your trial, and though the others seemed to take the information in stride, I had the feeling that today would not go over well. Your indoctrination was most uncommon; none of the rest of them have had the privileged opportunity that was presented to you.”

”Fighting?” Ahsoka asked, “I’d hardly call that a privileged opportunity. I didn’t have a choice.”

”Compared to the torture and isolation?” Grand Inquisitor asked.

”... I’m wanted alive.” Ahsoka reminded him, changing the subject.

”A strange thing, to be sure.” Grand Inquisitor shrugged, “But I’ve come to understand that the Emperor rarely makes a decision without thoroughly thinking it through. If he wants you alive, then alive you will remain. And so you walk among us, not a Jedi, but not yet a warrior of darkness.”

He smiled secretively.

”Not yet, anyway.”

Ahsoka could only manage a curt nod.

”You needn’t charade with me.” Grand Inquisitor continued, “As I told you earlier - I knew who you were. I knew you’re decision to leave was not one born of disillusionment, but of displaced trust. You don’t hate the Jedi as we do, but I... am unbothered by that. We all have our reasons for leaving.”

Ahsoka wondered, despite herself, _What was yours?_

Grand Inquisitor turned them down a new hall and added, “What becomes of you here is not my concern. I follow the Emperor’s whim. He decrees you must live, and so you shall. Just know, the moment he decides you are no longer of any use to him will be the moment I cut you down myself.”

”You sound so certain.” Ahsoka said, “But you’re seeming to forget that _I_ beat all of _you_ back there.”

”With your saber - of which it hasn’t escaped my notice that you currently do not possess.” Grand Inquisitor sneered.

”I don’t need my lightsaber to take you down.” Ahsoka promised. “In fact, if I remember correctly, I didn’t use my lightsaber to take you down at all. I used _yours._ ”  
  
“You caught me off guard the first time.” Grand Inquisitor conceded, “But I will not misjudge you again. A rematch is in order.”

Grand Inquisitor stopped then, offered his arm. Recognizing the gesture from Ninth Sister, Ahsoka reluctantly reached out, grasped it...

It was only after he’d walked away did Ahsoka have the thought,

_How many did he murder? How many watched the face of one meant to protect, destroy? How many were slain by the arm that I just held in my own?_

* * *

She walked as far as she could with her leg still healing, mapping out the interior of the building. Once, her legs nearly giving out under sudden lightheadedness, Ahsoka caught herself on the wall.

”... How long has it been since you last ate?” Vader asked. His voice did not startle her. His approach had been given away by the sound of his breathing through the helmet’s apparatus.  
  
“Um...” Ahsoka wracked her brain, regaining her balance, “Since I left—”

Ahsoka screwed her mouth shut, realizing she’d almost finished that sentence with, _“—_ _Bail Organa’s cruiser.”_

”Since you took me from Raada.” Ahsoka chose to say instead, heart turning over, hoping he wouldn’t press. She’d been lucky, she understood - she had yet to be tortured or interrogated over the whereabouts of allies or other Jedi. Not that she knew where the latter of those were, anyway.

The former she’d die to protect.

But perhaps Vader had come to that conclusion on his own. Perhaps it was the reason she had yet to endure any of it. He waited for Sidious to decide her usefulness had come to an end, and then would he strike. 

”Come.” Vader beckoned after she pushed herself off of the wall, “You require sustenance.”

 _Pretentious Sith-spit_ , Ahsoka thought. _Just say food_.

* * *

Anakin had treated Ahsoka to countless meals throughout the war, goading her out of the cruiser or the Temple with promises of diced roba, or vorzyd sliders with kibi strips. Having forgotten the foods of her homeworld and then, later, never having tasted anything but Temple cuisine and government rations, it admittedly hadn’t taken much for Ahsoka to follow him into the diners and cantinas strewn throughout the galaxy. Though Jedi were encouraged to distance themselves from self-indulging, Anakin had always excused his behavior as a means of teaching a lesson.

 _”What’s the lesson?”_ She’d asked, just to tease.

 _”Introducing my Padawan to good food, what else?”_ He’d answered every time without fail, smirking.

But that time had passed. Vader escorted her to a room she knew, immediately upon entering, to _not_ be a communal mess-hall. It was bleak and dark as everything else she’d seen thus far, a hologram display projector on one side, a large, wall to wall length window on the other. Between and beyond those was a door to another room. Where she stood wasn’t a common area, exactly... but it also wasn’t a meeting or intelligence office. It seemed somewhere in the middle, like a waiting area. Ahsoka looked around, uncertain. Vader pointed to a sitting area built into the wall opposite the window and instructed,

”Sit.”

Ahsoka didn’t have to be told twice.

A panel sat in the wall above the projector. He keyed in a combination.

”What was the point of all of that?” Ahsoka asked.

Vader finished whatever he was doing, turned to her and said, not needing her to explain the question,

”As much as you needed to prove yourself to them, the Inquisitors needed to prove themselves to me.”

”Wasn’t it... counterproductive, though?” Ahsoka asked. “You knew I could beat them. They fought poorly. One all but confirmed to me in the infirmary that you’d taught them such skilless techniques.”

When Vader said nothing, the truth dawned on her.

”You _wanted_ them to fail.”

Vader turned, swept to the window...

”Why?” Ahsoka asked, “Doesn’t it defeat the purpose of having them, if they lose?”

When Vader spoke, it was a careful, measured speech.

”I needed to make a statement. Specifically, I needed _you_ to make a statement. A majority of the Inquisitors did not choose the Dark Side for themselves. As you now know, most of them were tortured until they were corrupted. They were not willing participants. Their choice was... _manufactured_. What happened to them is not desirable, however.”

”... You’re giving _me_ a choice.” Ahsoka understood.

”On the contrary,” Vader countered, “I am _not_ giving you a choice. You _will_ join me - and when you do, it will not be the result of ineffective methods. It will be because your pain has brought you fully to my side once more.”

”So...” Ahsoka processed, “You want me to turn of my own free will — not through nefarious means. The only way to do that and prove that I... _belong_... with the Inquisitors was to have me fight them and prove to them that I was the better duelist.”

”Your insight serves you well.” Vader remarked.

”Torturing might have been easier.” Ahsoka admitted, “Might have saved you insubordinate backtalk.”

”The Inquisitors are mine to govern.” Vader replied, “They know the price of defiance.”

Ahsoka considered him. He seemed almost to be defending his actions. But why to her?

“I get the feeling your Master would be very cross if he discovered you were subverting his authority.” Ahsoka said.

Vader turned partway back to face her, regarded her for a long time. Ahsoka longed, again, to see his face — to know what he thought, to see his emotions mapped out in his expressions.

”My Master need not know.” Vader responded.

Ahsoka smirked, despite herself.

”So, you _can_ defy him after all.”

“... It is not defiance if I have not been explicitly ordered.”

”Say whatever makes you feel better about your own little rebellions, Master.”

A moment later, a droid entered the room, a tray of gruel in one hand, a small vat of liquid in the other. They set the items down before Ahsoka, exiting as soon as they’d done so.

”Eat.” Vader ordered, before disappearing into the other room. Ahsoka caught a glimpse of its insides - made out, much to her confusion, a round stasis chamber sitting at its center.

”Yes, Master.” She sighed when the door shut, picking up the utensil attached to the tray and shoveling the grey matter attempting to pass for food into her mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I based the Inquisitor’s portrayal here on what I know of them from their earliest portrayals in Star Wars media (it’s only been a year after the formation of the Empire, remember, so it felt wrong to write all of them as being exactly where they are in Rebels series/Fallen Order Video game).
> 
> Ahsoka understanding that Vader wants the Inquisitors to fail is a theory inspired by the way the Inquisitors are killed by either others or Vader himself fairly easily in their respective contents - Vader doesn’t seem fond of the Inquisitors because he fears they’ll replace him. This is alluded to in the Vader comics when he discovers them for the first time. He seems, at least to me, to want them to die when they’re sent out and chomps at every bit to take them out himself. He wanted to be the only one at Sidious’ side.


	8. Rescue pt. II

Kaeden Larte stood at the edge of a great field full of crop not yet ready for harvest, but soon. Nerfs grazed in the distance, their herder beckoning them home. The mountains just past the hills seemed to almost touch the sky with their peaks. Kaeden breathed in a lungful of the clean, crisp air, hoping it would clear her head full of distracted, horrific memory.

Her body had fully healed, thanks to the medical technology on Aldeeran. But her mind? That was a calloused, scabbed over wound. Not everyone had survived in the evacuations. In their attempt to free her and the few others from the Imperial prison, Selda and Vartan had perished. Kaeden knew she’d think about them forever, just like Neera, Kolvin, Hoban and all the rest who’d risked it all to free those who wouldn’t have made Prince Organa’s fleet, otherwise.

Aldeeran, whilst beautiful, wasn’t quite enough to distract Kaeden from how empty she now felt. She’d lost everything in a matter of weeks. She’d lost what little was left of her family, save for Miara. She and Miara had options, now, at least; everyone who’d survived the insurgency on Raada had opportunity like never before.

There were almost _too_ many options to choose from, if she were being honest with herself. Living on Raada most of her life, and then seeing what a Core world such as the one Captain Antilles had taken them to...

Life could be good, she guessed, but her heart wasn’t settled. Something was missing.

 _Someone_ was missing.

”Kaeden?” Came Miara’s voice.

Kaeden turned to find her sister making her way up from the fields. She wore the cleanest clones, now, just like Kaeden herself. She smiled as she approached. It didn’t quite reach her eyes, or fill out her face, but it was there. She’d been affected by everything and seen things too horrible for her age. She screamed in her sleep, sometimes, too. She was seeing someone specialized about that, talking about the things neither of them were yet ready to breach with each other, to another. Kaeden considered doing the same.

”Are you hungry?” Kaeden asked her.

”Yeah.” Miara perked up a bit at the prospect of food. “Let’s get the others and head to Selda’s.”

Kaeden withered. She searched her younger sister’s face, waiting for her to realize...

”Oh.” Miara said, expression going blank when she remembered. “Yeah. They...”

_Were all dead._

Overhead, a ship flew past, too fancy to be a common transport. Kaeden tracked its descent into the refugee center’s docking bay. Reaching out gently, she wrapped Miara in her arms. Her younger sister sighed into her embrace, returning the gesture fiercely.

”Let’s head inside.” Kaeden said after a moment. “I think the Prince is here.”

* * *

His name was Rex. Just... _Rex_. He told her that he’d served beside _Commander Tano_ from the battle of Christophisis to the siege of Mandalore. Kaeden didn’t understand the significance of what that meant, only recognized the pride that shown out of his deep-set eyes when he talked about her. Listening to him at once made Kaden feel awed and sick. The former because she felt like all of her ideas about the Togruta girl were being validated, but the latter because hearing a Clone talk the way he did, with so much fondness and forlorn, she realized she’d been so wrong. She’d lashed out when she’d been angry, made a false claim...

_“What do you even know about family? You never had one. And you probably never had friends, either. Just clones who had to do everything you said, because you were their superior officer.”_

... and she’d never even had time to apologize to Ahsoka for it.

”She came back for us.” Kaeden related to Rex, “For... _me_.”

”You saw her?” Rex asked hopefully.

”No.” Kaeden said, slumping. They sat around a table aboard the Prince’s ship, picking at a meal as they discussed Ahsoka. The Prince had thought it best they not reveal a clone trooper to the mess hall, especially one who’d ‘removed his chip.’ Kaeden didn’t fully understand that, and no one had really explained, so she’d just decided to follow along.

”I did, though.” Miara spoke up. She was a little brighter in the eyes, after Rex’s confessing he believed Ahsoka to still be alive. “She sent me to Selda’s, but then she never showed back up, afterward. We kept waiting but it was taking too long, so we decided to see what had happened. We found Ahsoka and the person who took Kaeden talking to her. We couldn’t hear what they were saying, though, and then suddenly...”

She gulped, continued, “They used their hand and reached out to her and... I can’t explain it. She just keeled over. That’s when we knew we were on our own.”

”This... person you saw.” Rex began, expression distraught, “They didn’t... kill her, did they?”

”No.” Miara shook her head. “Not that I saw, anyway. Selda didn’t let me stick around long after she fell. We had to get Kaeden. The last thing I remember seeing was them bending down to reach for her arm.”

Rex sat back, brows dipping. His gaze went somewhere else, fixed in a memory, maybe.

Miara looked down, trailing off. Rex let out an almost relieved sigh after a moment. Kaeden watched him closely, wondered what he thought, what he had planned. Though sadness seemed to hang around him like a second skin, she recognized the same spirit in his eyes that she had in Ahsoka’s.

”You really think Ahsoka survived?” Kaeden asked him. She didn’t want to get her hopes up, despite how badly she wanted to believe him. His claim about the bird had seemed... absurd and outlandish, to say the least. But she had to remind herself that the galaxy was a big place, and she’d stayed resolutely to one of its corners for most of her life. Who knew what kind of wild stuff waited for her, not just on Aldeeran but beyond it, too.

”I do.” Rex said resolutely, nodding. His vow was almost chilling with promise. “I’m going to find her.”

”Then we’re going to help.” Maira responded.

”Miara...” Kaeden began.

”What? You can’t honestly sit there and tell me no, can you? With the way you’ve been brooding I’m surprised you didn’t offer it first!”

Kaeden’s face heated. She felt Rex’s gaze sharpen on her considerably.

”I was going to offer to help.” Kaeden hissed, staring fixedly at her tray. “I just didn’t want to involve _you_.”

”I’m going to do what I want, remember?” Miara asked, softer than Kaeden had expected from her. She looked up, met her sister’s gaze...

Miara’s face broke into the realest, most genuine smile Kaeden had seen on her face since... well, since Kaeden couldn’t even remember. Her entire being seemed to become weightless at the sight of it. And then it was promptly ruined by her sister’s sinister, fodder-eating grin.

”C’mon,” Miara teased, “Let’s go save your girlfriend.”

“Miara!” Kaeden whisper-shouted, shooting Rex a nervous glance, only to find him trying and failing to stifle a faint chuckle behind his hand. She smacked her sister on the knee beneath the table, gave her _a look_.

”It was so obvious.” Miara rolled her eyes, laughing. “And the situation on Raada was too tense to joke about it. I don’t...”

She sobered a little at her own mentioning of the moon, continued,

”I don’t want to think about the bad stuff anymore. It was scary and I know I’m young, but... if it wasn’t for Ahsoka, I don’t think we ever would’ve seen each other again. We wouldn’t be alive here how we are now, if not for her. She distracted whatever that being was and gave us an opportunity to live. We need to thank her for that.”

” _Miara_.” Kaeden said, voice wobbling, “You have _no idea_ how much I want that. But that creature that took me...”

She shuddered to think about them, even now. Tall and imposing and silent as they’d cut down and killed her friends. They’d taken her back to prison, explaining nothing - but they hadn’t needed to. Kaeden had known they’d wanted Ahsoka, had used her to lure her back.

But she hadn’t understood their behavior at all, not at first. They’d had a medic secure her broken arm in a sling but not heal it, and then they hadn’t tortured her the way the others had during her first capture. In fact, they hadn’t tortured her at all; but somehow they had been all the more frightening for it. Kaeden thought she’d been as good as gone when they’d activated the red saber, letting the blade sizzle just a fraction from the skin of her throat.

But then they’d deactivated it just as soon as they’d arrived, never sparing her a second glance as they’d swept from the room.

”If it’s all the same to you both.” Rex cleared his throat after a moment, said apologetically, “I’d feel better about our odds if I did this alone.”

Miara’s face fell, but Kaeden couldn’t conceal her relief. She let out a long sigh.

”Can you tell me if Ahsoka left anything behind with you?” Rex asked of them, “Any clues that might help me?”

”The hologram she recorded for Selda.” Miara said, “Though, Kaeden’s watched it a million times already. If there was anything worth finding on it, she would have found it by now.”

Kaeden blushed.

”There’s nothing else?” Rex asked, a bit despairingly.

”... Her ship, maybe.” Kaeden started after a moment, “I never saw it leave with Antilles’ fleet, and it’s possible the Imperials took it or destroyed it, but... it might still be on Raada.”

”Then that’s where I’ll start my search.” Rex said, and though he seemed anxious to leave right then and there, he continued steadily with his meal, taking methodical bites. Kaeden understood he was trying not be rude. She nudged Miara, signaling it was time to go, but Rex had keen eyes and caught her, spoke up,

”Stay. I’d like to hear your full story. Both of you, if you’re willing to share, that is.”

“You heard most of it.” Miara sighed, “Unfortunately, nothing much exciting happened until Ahsoka showed up.”

Rex smiled a little, eyes clouding over with memory.

”Well...” He tried, “Then tell me more about the spitfire’s misadventures. It feels like it’s been too long since I last saw her.”

He looked at Kaeden with curiousity.

”As it’s recently been made known to me, you two must’ve gotten pretty close?” He asked, raising an almost _playful_ brow.

Kaeden blushed, _again_ , and her gaze went skittering. She choked on the piece of food she’d been chewing, used her glass of water to wash it down. Rex and Miara were both chuckling now. _Unbelievable_.

”Admittedly, no.” Kaeden said. She wasn’t sure why she was fessing up. She barely knew Rex and it wasn’t like Miara and she had ever discussed relationships like that, in that way, not in any solid detail. “But I...”

”Say no more.” Rex said apologetically. “It’s not my place to pry. I’ll just wrangle the information out of the Commander next time I see her.”

He winked, went back to his meal. Miara smiled a little sadly at her before doing the same.

Rex departed not long after, the Prince Organa stepping out of another part of the ship to give him words neither Kaeden nor Miara were made privy to.

Kaeden had noticed as she’d stepped off the ship two little astromechs engaged in what appeared to be a conversation. One was blue and white, the other red and green. A smile stretched her lips at the sight of them. They’d appeared to get along well. It was if they were friends being reunited. Unbidden, she thought of Ahsoka...

”I’m going to kiss you the next time I see you.” She avowed, voice a whisper as she watched the sun go down and give way to moonless night. She sat in her and Miara’s bedroom at the refugee center, looking through the window. She continued, “If we aren’t in active danger, that is, and only if you’ll let me. But first, I’m going to apologize for everything that I said.”

”Your priorities are certainly in order.” Miara commented from her bed, invested in a holonovel she’d swiped from the library. She turned the screen to the next page and continued, “Ahsoka will probably beat you to it, though. The kissing, I mean.”

Kaeden paused, frowned, turned to her sister and asked, “What?”

”Ahsoka liked you.” Miara said casually, never looking away from her device, “It was painfully obvious. You were just being dense and couldn’t see it.”

”I...” Kaeden began, struck. She thought back to every moment they’d spent together with Miara nearby, tried to view it through her eyes...

“Okay, enough.” Miara said, putting the holonovel down. She got up, went to sit beside Kaeden at the window and continued, “You’re going to give yourself a headache at this rate.”

”Aldeeran has good painkillers.” Kaeden waved away her sister’s concern.

”... What will we do?” Miara asked after a beat. She turned her gaze to the setting sun. “I heard you talking to the resident doctor about her job. Will you go to school, now? Learn to be a doctor, too?”

”I think so.” Kaeden nodded, surprised at her own certainty. She couldn’t say she’d always been interested in the medical field, only that the lack of advanced medical technology on Raada, in comparison to Aldeeran, had been a source of inspiration and motivation. She’d contracted too many injuries in her life that had taken days to heal.

 _Hells_ , she thought, _when Ahsoka showed up, I was sporting a limp_.

”What about you?” Kaeden asked Miara, “What do you want to do?”

”You already know what I want to do.”

”Ah, yes.” Kaeden sighed, recalling the way Miara had pestered every A-Wing pilot who’d come to their rescue. “Pilot and bomb building. I’m so proud.”

”Don’t be sarcastic.” Miara groaned, “It’s a realistic goal!”

”It is.” Kaeden said, and she meant it. “It’s really admirable that you want to join the Rebellion. I want to join, too, help people the way Ahsoka did, though maybe in a... different capacity. But we can’t join yet, not until you’re older. No joining the rebellion until you’re... twenty!”

”Twenty?” Miara guffawed, “That’s not fair. Nineteen!”

”Twenty!”

”Eighteen!”

”What? You just said nineteen a second ago!”

”I’m driving a hard bargain.”

”Okay, nineteen.” Kaeden conceded, “But no sooner!”

Miara laughed, the sound filling up all the empty spaces. Kaeden wrapped her arm around her sister’s shoulders and pulled her close.

”Deal.” Miara agreed, leaning into her embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the quote in italics is directly taken from the Ahsoka novel by E.K. Johnston
> 
> I’m so sorry about Selda and Vartan, please don’t be too upset with me (;_;)


	9. Recognition

That night, struggling to sleep despite her tired state, the Grand Inquisitor’s words replayed in Ahsoka’s mind.

_”... I knew who you were. I knew you’re decision to leave was not one born of disillusionment, but of displaced trust. You don’t hate the Jedi as we do, but I... am unbothered by that. We all have our reasons for leaving.”_

She hadn’t responded to or refuted his assertion. If she could have, though - if she could have been sure that the consequences of such an action would not have garnered her death - Ahsoka knew she would have said,

”I wanted to go back, though. I wanted to be a Jedi again.”

But such a statement would have undoubtedly spurred him slay her right then, right there, consequences be damned. Vader would have perhaps cut him down for acting so imprudently, but she doubted it would have mattered to the Grand Inquisitor - he would have been fulfilling his purpose by killing her.

Come morning, Ahsoka exited her room to find Barriss waiting in the hall, a new suit in her hands, ready to replace the tattered one she wore. Ahsoka took it wordlessly, went back inside to change. When she returned, she handed the one the Grand Inquisitor had slashed through. Barriss took it, folded it up neatly and said,

”When I was informed to request a new suit for you, I feared it meant that Lord Vader had taken off one of your limbs.”

”Vader didn’t fight me.” Ahsoka responded, appalled to even consider him doing that. “He made me fight the others.”

”And you survived.” Barriss expressed her awe. “You’ve come a long way.”

”Surviving was my only option.” Ahsoka said, “If I’d lost, I’d be dead.”

”... I’m to escort you to the hangar bay.” Barriss said after a moment. Ahsoka noticed her grip on the ruined suit grew tighter. “Lord Vader is taking you... _away_.”

The look on her face indicated she didn’t know what for, or why - but that she wanted to.

”I’m as clueless as you.” Ahsoka said. Then, gesturing, she instructed, “Lead the way.”

Barriss brought them to the lifts. They stepped inside.

”The Grand Inquisitor mentioned something.” Ahsoka said as Barriss pressed the key that would take them up. “He’d said you were... tortured.”

”I was tortured, yes.” Barriss confirmed, as if the truth was but a mere inconvenience, now. The look on her face, however, betrayed her tone.

”And you didn’t break.” Ahsoka asked, “What made you... _come back_...from where you’d been?”

”... I had a lot of time to think about what I’d done.” Barriss said softly, “Alone as I was, I was forced to confront myself. The torture came, and they thought it would plummet me back to what I’d been before. You were right that they didn’t succeed in breaking me, but that was only because I’d already been broken as far as I _could_ be.”

The lift came to a stop. The doors opened. Barriss moved to step out-

Ahsoka grabbed her by her braced arm, pulled her back inside. When the doors closed behind her, Ahsoka hit the stall key.

Barriss looked at her, bewildered.

”I...” Ahsoka said, bewildered herself, “I have to get this off my chest. I have to say something to you, and you have to listen.”

Barriss searched her face, mouth agape...

”What you did was terrible.” Ahsoka began shakily, “I can never agree with it, but I will concede this: you weren’t wrong. What the Jedi and the Republic were becoming... it could’ve only ended in disaster. And it _did_. But you used me as an example to prove your point, and I almost _died_ because of it, and I’m not sure if I can ever forget that.”

”Ahsoka...” Barriss began roughly. Ahsoka held up her hand, cutting her off, and continued,

”But I can... I can _forgive_ you.”

The look in Barriss’s blue eyes was wounding.

”I’ve been dishing out my forgiveness pretty unfairly, these days.” Ahsoka said, crossing her arms, “And I see it in your face, how sorry you are for what you did. You betrayed me, but... you weren’t the only one.”

Barriss’s eyes filled with tears. She looked down.

”I don’t deserve your forgiveness.” She whispered.

”Well, it doesn’t matter.” Ahsoka said, harsher than she’d intended, “You’ve got it.”

”I didn’t want to die.” Barriss confessed, catching Ahsoka off guard with how _raw_ she sounded. “The torture _itself_ made me wish in the moment that I just _would_ , but after I came out of it... I didn’t want to die. But now, _I do_. I wish now that I _had_ died. I wish the clones had killed me. I wish I hadn’t fought so hard. Palpatine said he wanted me for something else, and I... if you knew what I’ve done, you wouldn’t be so willing to...”

Her voice caught in her throat. She choked back a sob. Ahsoka watched her, conflicted and concerned...

”They’ve made me open _holocrons_ , Ahsoka.” Barriss wept. “Our most closely guarded secrets and I... I’ve _given_ them _up_.”

Ahsoka sucked in a breath.

”It wasn’t...” She ventured hesitantly, thinking of Cad Bane and his ‘ _mysterious’_ benefactor that he’d refused to name, had feared so badly that he’d resisted the mind probe of _three_ Jedi who’d tried and failed to get him to talk. “It wasn’t the _children_ , was it?”

” _No_.” Barriss sighed, looking so relieved to be able to say that. “I don’t know where that crystal fell to, but hopefully it never ends up here.”

Barriss continued, wiping furiously at her cheeks, “I don’t know what they use them for - they’ve thus far only been training and history - but this is why they’ve been keeping me alive, this is why I didn’t die. But I should have died. I shouldn’t have been selfish. If I were dead, then-”

”Stop talking.” Ahsoka said in a rush, reeling. “Just... _breathe_ , Barriss. Breathe.”

Barriss was shaking, gasping for air. She fell to her knees. Ahsoka reached out, hands uncertain...

”Kill me.” Barriss pleaded, clutching herself around her middle. The words felt like a gut punch. Ahsoka blinked, and suddenly she was years younger, and the room was biting cold, and Barriss was writhing around in some kind of pain Ahsoka couldn’t even _imagine._

Barriss continued imploringly, desperately,

“ _Please_.”

”If I kill you, then I’m dead, too.” Ahsoka said, voice sounding strange to her ears. Her vision momentarily blurred, but she reigned back the tears.

Vader was nearby. She felt him. It was time for her to leave.

Reaching down, Ahsoka grabbed Barriss by her forearms, hauled her up. Shock replaced the anguish captured in her eyes as Ahsoka met her watery gaze.

”We survived.” Ahsoka reasoned. She moved her hands to Barriss’s shoulders, shook her once, _hard_ , wanting desperately for her words to resonate. “For some reason, _we_ were the ones who lived through that _massacre_. Begging for death isn’t going to change _that_ or _anything else_ that’s happened since. _Living_ and _fighting_ is.”

Barriss blinked, one last tear rolling down her cheek.

“I’m not going to kill you.” Ahsoka said, shaking her head. She felt her face harden as the words pushed past her teeth. “I _can’t_.”

Barriss said nothing, lips parting on words she couldn’t summon.

Ahsoka released her, stepped back, reached for the key that would allow her exit the lift...

Barriss stopped her with a hand on her wrist, said, rushed, “Wait. Your helmet.”

”... Right.” Ahsoka said, taken aback. She used the Force to shift the panels over her features. Satisfied, Barriss released her. Ahsoka opened the door and stepped out.

Vader waited in the distance of the hangar, a transport primed and ready at his back. He stood with hands on hips, impatience and... _something else_... abounding. A little ways in the distance, waiting at another ship, were three Inquisitors: Ninth Sister, Sixth Brother and Tenth Brother.

Ahsoka approached Vader, never sparing any of the others more than cursory glance. Though she knew they watched her. She was suddenly thankful that Barriss had reminded her to secure her helmet around her features. Even though she’d resolved to face everything honestly, she was glad none of them would be able to see that she’d almost cried.

”Well.” She said, thinking she’d never get used to the sound of her own voice as it filtered through the vocoder, “Where are we going?”

” _We_ are going to Mon Cala.” Vader responded, and though he didn’t gesture to the Inquisitors, she knew she was being excluded. “ _You_ are going to see the Emperor.”

Ahsoka wanted to ask why, but sensed that Vader would not tell her. Not because he wanted to keep things a mystery, but simply because he didn’t _know_.

Vader turned to the transport that waited for her, and she gazed up to find Vaneé standing at the top of the ramp. He smiled that secretive smile when she looked his way, bowed low...

Ahsoka swallowed hard and boarded the ship.

She turned back as the door of the transport closed up behind her, watched as Vader watched _her_ until the ship was sealed, his imposing figure never once turning away.

It was as the ship made its way fully out of the Works district and to the once-Temple that Ahsoka realized that the _something else_ she’d felt coming from Vader had been anxiety. She could understand that. She was feeling a great deal of it herself. But what was his about? Going to Mon Cala? She had no idea what he was leaving for, but the retinue of Inquisitors indicated it couldn’t be anything good. She didn’t doubt, however, that whatever the reason for his departure, it was done in part by Sidious to get him out of the way for whatever he had... _planned_... for her.

Ahsoka wrapped her arms around herself, uncaring that Vaneé was so near, and tried to rub away the sudden cold that seemed to seep into her skin.

* * *

Vaneé escorted her up until the moment she had to descend down, down, _down_ into the bowels of the once-Temple. Someone had been drilling; something waited below. Ahsoka had the sense she was suffocating, with how entrenched she soon became. The journey wasn’t done on foot or even in the company of another living being. Ahsoka was taken via pod by a protocol droid who went by 11-4D, though the amount of arms they had ending in appendages that didn’t resemble hands told her that _protocol droid_ was probably just one of many roles the droid served. They navigated the pod which sank them deeper and deeper, past decimated statues and strange, red vines that seemed to almost breathe with life.

”This place is _infected_.” Ahsoka muttered to herself, hand pressed to domed glass that kept her separated from what waited beyond. Horrified, she wondered, “Why didn’t anyone notice?”

If the droid had heard her, then they’d chosen not to respond.

It felt like an hour had passed before the tiny ship 11-4D had used to fly them down stopped, settling on even ground. The domed top came off...

“Get out.” The droid said. Ahsoka rolled her eyes, hopped down...

Instantly, she felt _colder_. She’d felt cold during the descent and even before that on the way to the once-Temple, but it had only gotten worse as they’d continued to descend. Now it was...

Enough to vaporize her every breath.

The red vines reappeared, pulsing and glowing as she walked. Ahsoka flinched back when she thought she caught one reach for her out of the peripheral. _Your eyes are playing tricks on you_ , she told herself. But when it felt like something wrapped around her ankle, she knew no amount of self-soothing would erase the nightmares she was soon to encounter.

She walked. She walked and walked for what felt like forever. At times, it seemed the path before her stretched infinitely. But then, suddenly, it gave way to a clearing covered in more of the writhing, pulsing red vines. Two obelisks framed an altar engraved with runes Ahsoka didn’t recognize. Waiting for her there was Sidious, hood up, something in his hand.

Ahsoka had to force the falter out of her step when she realized it was a _knife_.

”Stand here.” Sidious instructed, not wasting time with pleasantries. Ahsoka shivered like no other, went reluctantly where he pointed to the center of the shrine. He approached after a moment, held out his gnarled, grotesque hand palm up...

”Give me your hand.” He ordered.

Ahsoka didn’t move.

”Don’t make me repeat myself.” He threatened, voice an unnatural growl, the likes of which she’d never before heard. Ahsoka eyed the knife from behind the mask, weighing her options. She didn’t have her saber. Vader had taken it. Would she be able to fight him with it anyway? He’d been powerful enough to hide himself in plain sight for years. Did the power that must’ve taken translate into physical strength, too? She was in a place she’d never known existed, a place she didn’t fully understand. She thought of Mortis, thought of the gaps in her memory, the way Anakin had looked so haunted after she’d woken from what had felt like a hazy, fever induced dream...

The helmet’s plates suddenly retracted. Ahsoka was compelled down onto her knees, Sidious’ sinister control of the Force wrapping around her. He plucked his fingers, and her arm lifted, shot out and into his waiting palm. He took her by her wrist, and she was unable to fight back or resist. It was like time itself had stopped her. All she could do was watch, helpless, as Sidious sliced open the skin of her palm. Blood oozed out, hit the altar that sat beneath her knees-

Blue flame licked to life around her. Ahsoka nearly screamed when the fire touched her arm, searing pain blooming and blistering along her flesh. Sidious released her, and she pulled her limb back to her chest, watched as he retreated into the shadows, chanting an incantation...

“Kintik hadzuka sutta chwituskak!”

Ahsoka drew her legs in. She looked around, found herself trapped on all sides by the blue flames that stretched ever higher. She pressed against the gash on her palm, hoping to stem the blood flow. Sidious’ raucous voice seemed to come at her from every direction.

“ _Kintik hadzuka sutta chwituskak!_ ”

Ahsoka clutched at her head, screwed her eyes shut...

... and opened them somewhere far away from the licking blue flames and breathing red vines. She was waste deep in dark waters. A flowing light waited in the distance.

”Come out of this.” Came a voice, serene and somewhat familiar, “Don’t allow this monster defile that which I’ve bestowed on you and you alone.”

”... How?” Ahsoka asked, and she felt heat so intense it choked her. She clutched her throat, the muscles spasming...

But the voice didn’t answer. Ahsoka watched the light in the distance fade to nothing, blinked...

... found herself, again, somewhere else far away. The water was gone, and the heat from before grew less intense. She released her throat, looked around, a world taking shape under her feet. It grew, inexplicably, as cold as the world she’d left behind before the heat had taken control. She recognized herself sitting but couldn’t move her limbs or control her words. When she did move, when she did speak... it was like she was _possessed_.

She turned, saw Anakin.

 _Anakin_. Not an unfeeling terror in a suit, but the man she remembered in the flesh. His bewildered blue eyes searched her face.

”Hey, what’s wrong with you?” He asked.

What _was_ wrong with her? She wanted to know, too. How had she let things get as far as they had?

”Snap out of it. This isn’t you, Ahsoka!”

He was right. _This_ wasn’t right. She was wrong and she didn’t want to be. Concentrating on what she could remember, Ahsoka exhaled, seemed to detach...

... a strangled cry forced her eyes open. Ahsoka gasped, and the blue flames extinguished around her. She looked up...

... found Sidious crumpled against the face of a statue that had broken from its body, wheezing...

” _What did you do?_ ” He asked, voice a rumble in the back of his throat. He struggled to his feet, scurried back into the clearing. Ahsoka saw his outline faintly smoked.

She had no idea what she’d done, whatever it was. She could only remember being somewhere strange, seeing Anakin, feeling his worry and want for her to follow him. Sidious eyed her from beneath his cloak, eyes glinting and wide. He reached out a hand-

Ahsoka shot to her feet, backed away and off of the altar, nearly tripping in her haste. She saw the blood she’d shed pooled in the grooves of the stone slab and suddenly couldn’t resist the overwhelming urge to vomit. She fell to her knees, this time out of an inability to stand, rather than a compulsion to lower, and spilled her guts. It was as if she were filled at once with adrenaline and dread. Confused and distressed at the feelings at sudden war within her, Ahsoka began to shake. She collapsed onto her side, slid her gaze to the cloaked figure that approached...

Sidious came to a stop just before her, stood above her, simply watched as convulsions wracked her frame.

Ahsoka wanted to ask, _“What did_ you _do?”_

But no words came to her, and her eyes rolled into the back of her head, and all that was left was the cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact (((and a potential spoiler for the Vader comics so if you haven’t read them and want to skip a bit)))
> 
> Vader recovered one of the kyber crystals with all the Force sensitive children on it a bit after the Empire started and promptly CRUSHED IT TO DUST IN HIS CYBERNETIC FIST because he’s just that hardcore dramatic. He retrieved it from Jocasta Nu who unfortunately :_( did not survive their encounter in one of the Vader comics. He destroyed the crystal because he didn’t want to be “replaced” in the future by another. (A part of me likes to believe, however, that it was one of Anakin’s final acts of decency to prevent future children from being subjected to what he and the other Inquisitors had gone through.)
> 
> Another fun fact: Vader did actually go on a mission to Mon Cala with those specific Inquisitors. It roughly would coincide with where this timeline is in conjecture with canon. If you’re curious you can find the details regarding it in this link below under ‘Mission to Mon Cala’
> 
> [anakin skywalker](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Anakin_Skywalker)
> 
> I’m sure a lot of you know, but the place Ahsoka was brought to was the Sith Shrine sitting below the Jedi Temple. If you want more information, you can find it here:
> 
> [sith shrine](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Sith_shrine)
> 
> 11-4D was really Sidious’ personal droid. They really did have, apparently, too many arms. :/
> 
> [11-4D](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/11-4D)
> 
> Inspiration behind whatever the hell Sidious was doing to Ahsoka comes from season 6 of the clone wars when Sidious does this same exact thing (sort of) to Dooku. (Which, oddly enough, took place in the Works district at the building which would eventually become the Inquisitors Headquarters.)


	10. Recuperative

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> astounded is I at how quickly I write these days

Ahsoka woke on her back across a stiff bed, a hand grasping her own. She looked down, found Barriss sitting beside her with eyes closed in concentration, arms free of the braces, clutching at the gloveless palm Sidious had slashed opened. Ahsoka felt the energy of what transpired. She recognized this act, this _art_ , despite never having been able to focus enough in the past to perform it herself.

”... Healing isn’t a mutually beneficial exchange.” Ahsoka croaked, even though she understood that Barriss already knew as much; she’d been one of the most skilled, knowledgeable healers among the Jedi.

Barriss’s eyes snapped open. Her lips parted on a gasp. She leapt to her feet, never releasing Ahsoka’s hand. She brought Ahsoka’s arm to her chest, clutching tightly, and Ahsoka saw the blood had dried and crusted along her sleeve.

”That depends on one’s point of view.” Barriss remarked unsteadily, expression softening. Quietly she asked, ”How do you feel? What _happened_ to you?”

”You tell me.” Ahsoka grimaced. She tried to sit up, but found quickly that she couldn’t without Barriss’s assistance. Together, they maneuvered her into an upright position.

”I’ve no idea.” Barriss confessed, releasing her hand. She sat back in the chair she’d pulled to Ahsoka’s bedside. Ahsoka finally got a good look at the room. It was the Temple-turned-palace’s med-bay.

She was above ground once again.

Barriss continued, “I was escorted from the Inquisitors Headquarters with no warning or explanation, was brought here, and... you were _unconscious_ , and Palpatine was here, and he told me to heal you, see if there was something... something _other_ that I could find to your injuries.”

”Well,” Ahsoka asked hesitantly, struggling to remember exactly what had happened to her in that... _place_. “Was there? Something _other_?”

”I _believe_ you had a seizure.” Barriss replied, dismayed. “But it had long passed, by the time I’d arrived. The only thing that needed immediate fixing was the cut on your palm.”

Ahsoka lifted the hand that he’d cut - the one Barriss had been healing - found the skin intact, as if the Sith Lord had never tampered with it at all.

”Thank you.” Ahsoka said softly.

”It wasn’t a big wound.” Barriss responded, equally as soft. “It didn’t take much.”

”Still.” Ahsoka acknowledged, “After so long being cut off from the Force as you were, I can’t imagine how difficult it was to refocus and find your concentration. I was in a pair of Force-inhibitors once for less than half an hour, and it was difficult, afterward. I couldn’t even sense that the bounty hunter Anakin and I were chasing was disguised right in front of me.”

”... Let’s get you cleaned up.” Barriss said after a moment, eyeing the blood. She stood, went to retrieve a sponge and soap from the cabinets lining the opposite wall and filled up a small pan with water. As she worked, Ahsoka finally took notice of the Storm Troopers stationed at the door. There were only two, but she didn’t doubt more waited in the hall beyond.

Barriss returned to her side, and Ahsoka rolled up the sleeve to the suit, helped her to wipe down the blood that had seeped through.

”I guess this means a new uniform is in order.” Ahsoka found it in herself to joke.

”At this rate, you’ll bankrupt the Empire.” Barriss responded, lips quirking. Ahsoka huffed a laughed. Barriss wrung out the sponge, returned to the basin to dispose of the now pink water.

”What cut your palm?” Barriss asked when she returned to her side, voice low. She eyed the Storm Troopers as she asked, cautious, “Do you remember anything at all before you were brought here?”

”I want to tell you,” Ahsoka whispered, glancing at the guards as she said, “But I don’t think you’d even _believe_ me.”

Barriss opened her mouth to speak when-

” _Good_. You’re awake.”

They both turned, alarmed. Sidious had managed to enter without their noticing. He stood in the doorway flanked by his Red guard.

”Leave us.” He spoke to the room. Barriss rose to her feet, shot Ahsoka a worried glance before she approached the exit. One of the Storm Troopers stationed at the door stopped her before she could depart, presented her with her arm braces. She took them quickly, fastened them on. Escorted out by the Storm Troopers, and then followed swiftly by the Red guard, it was soon just Ahsoka and Sidious.

He approached her bedside. Ahsoka grit her teeth, refusing to be intimidated.

”What the _hell_ did you do to me down there?” She asked, voice low. She knew it wasn’t wise, speaking to him in this way; but she could no longer find it in herself to care. If Sidious wanted her alive, she resolved, then he’d just have to put up with everything that came with that.

”An ancient spell meant to unlock hidden memory.” Sidious answered easily, much to her shock. Sourly, he added, “... It _should_ have worked.”

Ahsoka said nothing, taken aback at his immediate response.

”While you were coming to,” He continued, “I spent considerable time thinking over why my spell had failed to produce the desired outcome. I came to understand, through my failure, the truth that I’d so sought.”

Ahsoka raised a brow-marking. Sidious actually _smiled_ at her, the expression discomposing.

”Tell me, _Inquisitor_.” Sidious said, voice laced with mock-sympathy, “Haven’t you ever wondered where your memories of Mortis have gone?”

”... How do _you_ know about that?” Ahsoka asked, voice a whisper. She knew, already, the answer; she _knew_ she did. The only way Sidious could have known about Mortis was if...

... _Anakin had told him_.

” _You_ showed it to me.” Sidious said, as if he’d read her thoughts. Perhaps he _had_. “While one might have supplied me the knowledge of the existence of the world and it’s occupants, one did not know the nature of the gifts of said occupants. Through you, I unlocked what was hidden... but only one part. You _know_. You _saw_ it. Wouldn’t you like to see the rest?”

He held out his hand, yellow eyes shining from beneath the brim of his hood...

”Why are you doing this?” Ahsoka asked. She didn’t _understand_ him. “Why do you need to know about something _I_ can’t even remember?”

Sidious scowled, lowered his hand...

”I committed an error.” Sidious clicked his tongue, “You... hold the secret to something I desire. I’d hoped to unlock it, but the ritual was unsuccessful. For us to proceed, I need you _willing_ to open your mind to me. Until you surrender, there is a power that hinders me.”

”A power?” Ahsoka questioned, concerned at how... _conversational_... he was becoming with her. “ _What_ power?”

Had the ‘ _power’_ they discussed been what had blasted him back, destroying the ritual and making his body curl smoke?

Sidious responded, clearly unhappy about it, ”... A power second only to one.”

”... _Anakin_.” Ahsoka realized, eyes widening. “But how...?”

”That is what we will discover.” Sidious implored, “ _Together_. Now, rise. We will try-”

” _No_.”

Sidious stilled. His lips pulled back against his teeth as he growled,

” _What_?”

”You said you needed me _willing_.” Ahsoka reminded him, her heart pounding against her chest, “That’s why your ritual failed, right? Because you _forced_ me.”

Sidious snarled.

”I’m not as curious as you about the things I don’t remember.” Ahsoka said, serious, “The way I see it, there’s a _reason_ the memory is blocked.”

Sidious considered her, spitting anger in his eyes. She watched him think, watched him decipher. He was devising scenarios, ways and words where he’d convince her to change her mind. He said, too certain,

”You will soon reconsider.”

* * *

They returned to Inquisitors Headquarters. Sidious brought them before a one-way window that looked in at a crèche, of a sort, with babies in their metal bassinets, tossing and turning in fitful slumber. A strange species of caretaker moved around them, dressed in dark red robe, faces covered with expressionless mask. There were six in total, and they peered into the cribs intermittently, casting long shadows, making the babies whimper.

”You’ve been taking children.” Ahsoka comprehended, gulping. She looked at Sidious with dread, understanding why he’d brought her here. Pressing a hand to the glass, she thought of Mustafar and feeling the dark side and finding those infants and...

“You did this before.” She couldn’t shake the horror out of her words, “You’re going to... you’ve _been_ -”

” _Nursemaids_.” Sidious cut her off. She turned to find him with finger pressed to the comm. on the panel below the window. “Bring me test subject number nine.”

”Yes, our Lord.” They all responded as one, voices too eager. They moved in near synchronization from the antechamber into a room unseen. When they returned moments later, single file, they presented a toddler to the glass. The one who carried them held them out, showcasing their near limp body and cooed,

” _Look at the pretty thing._ ”

Ahsoka’s eyes widened in recognition of the infant before her. She’d watched this very child move a stone across the threshold of a doorway without lifting a single finger. She’d left them behind on Thabeska when the Empire arrived. She’d mourned them in their destroyed home, thinking they’d been slain. They were...

” _Hedala_!”

Ahsoka’s shock rippled through the Force, shattered the glass beneath her palm. The nursemaids moved back, muttering a language Ahsoka no longer understood, moving the bassinets with them. Ahsoka hopped over the ledge, ran at full speed, arm reaching out both physically and through the Force...

Something hit her in the back, blue and sizzling. It electrified her insides, rattled her teeth and bones...

Ahsoka dropped in a heap to the floor, smoke curling from her skin...

The babies woke, began _wailing_. Hedala blinked uncharacteristically droopy eyes, looked up and mumbled,

”Ashla?”

” _H-Hedala_.” Ahsoka choked out, crawling across the ground now littered with shards of glass. The crying had started a chain reaction, and now Hedala wept, too. Weakly, she fought against the hold of her captures.

” _Calm_ yourself.” Sidious bellowed, stepping into the room through a side door. She watched him make his way over, robes trailing, glass crunching beneath his every step.

”What are you _doing_ to them?” Ahsoka grit, struggling to her knees and then to her feet. Hedala’s cries had turned to hoarse screams. The nursemaids made shushing noises devoid of any real effort, started retreating with the babies from the antechamber once more. Hedala was hoisted onto the shoulder of the one who held her. Realizing they were soon to be separated, she started fighting in earnest. But the effort was sluggish, seemed to weaken her with every passing second. Hedala soon couldn’t persist and slumped against the nursemaid’s shoulder. Thick tears trailed down her frightened face.

”Ashla!” She called hoarsely, her little hand reaching...

” _Please_...” Ahsoka gasped, never taking her eyes off of Hedala until she was out of sight. She needn’t ask how Sidious had known to use Hedala against her. The dark side, as it was being made known to her with every passing day, granted insight that defied possibility.

The tears Ahsoka had managed to hold back that morning finally shed, and so intense were they that the world around her blurred beyond comprehension. Sidious’ shape wobbled when she finally brought herself to face him.

“ _Please_ , don’t hurt her.” She begged, “Don’t hurt _any_ of them.”

”Their fate rests in your hands.” Sidious said simply, “You must choose.”

Ahsoka flinched at the memory that those words invoked.

“I’ll...” Ahsoka shook her head, voice breaking, “I’ll need to ensure for myself, _every day_ , that Hedala and the other younglings aren’t being harmed.”

”Don’t test the bounds of my generosity.” Sidious warned, “What I have planned for them does _not_ involve you.”

”Either I’m allowed to verify for every _kriffing_ day that I’m here that these children _aren’t_ being harmed...” Ahsoka nearly shouted, enunciating her every word, “... or I don’t choose _anything_.”

Sidious’ lips curled down, his eyes flashed.

”Then you _die_!” He roared.

Ahsoka spread her arms wide, challenging him.

”Then strike me down.” She said, hoping he was bluffing, “Kill me and _lose_ whatever it is you need me for.”

Sidious bared his teeth, raised his hands. Ahsoka stared him down, refusing to flinch or cower. Blue energy shot from his fingers, hit her solidly in the chest. The force of it knocked her off her feet. She grunted when she fell into the glass once again, her vision spotting...

”It is unfortunate that we cannot reach a compromise.” Sidious sighed deeply, drawing near her crumpled form, “The test subjects’ fates are _sealed_. It would perhaps surprise you to know, however, that I do not harbor them to watch them die.”

”Then...” Ahsoka panted, rolling onto her side, remembering her promise. She pressed her forehead into the floor, struggling to catch her breath. Taking a deep lungful of air that smelled of burnt flesh, Ahsoka closed her eyes and said, defeated, “Then it will be enough... to know... they live.”

She wasn’t going to leave Anakin. Not this way; not in any way. Not ever. She _refused_.

Satisfied, Sidious said, “The child you call _Hedala_ has thus far passed every test. If she weren’t to survive the slave conditioning process, she would have perished already. She is most resilient. I see her making a _fine_ Inquisitor.”

Ahsoka bit her tongue to keep from disputing his claim. She wasn’t going to allow that to happen.

”Have we reached a resolution?” Sidious asked her.

When she at first didn’t respond, Sidious’ said, voice lowering several octaves and making her skin crawl, ”I tire of this discussion. Decide now if you are willing to unlock the secrets, or your life _ends_.”

Ahsoka grappled. There was no choice, not really. She refused to die, refused to leave this place unless she took Anakin with her; now, too, all the younglings as well. She wouldn’t leave them behind; not in death, not in life. But what would be the repercussions? Could she stomach the knowledge that the infants were being tortured whilst she played pretend, all in the hopes of rescuing the one she was unwilling to let go of - the one who she was starting to doubt would even be able to see the error of his ways?

Ahsoka’s eyes fell to the ground, fixated on the splintered pieces of glass. What was she _becoming_?

 _Dying isn’t going to fix anything_ , Ahsoka reminded herself. Her hands curled into fists. Dying was only going to allow the Sith before her continue to wreak havoc and spread chaos across the galaxy. Telling him no would mean letting those children suffer until they broke or died, would mean even more children taken in the future.

Not saying _yes_ was going to mean Anakin remain trapped in the darkness forever.

”I’m willing.” Ahsoka said, nary a waver or doubt in her words. Though she felt herself fall apart on the inside. “I’ll help you.”

Sidious’ cackled, and the sound seemed to echo infinitely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the nursemaids are real and they give me the chills :/
> 
> their description in the link below makes me wonder if they aren’t actually robots
> 
> [nursemaids](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Nursemaids)


	11. Reliance

“There was quite the commotion among the cleaning droids today.”

Ahsoka glanced up from her tray of food. She sat in the mess hall, forcing herself to eat despite her lack of appetite. Approaching her was the Seventh Sister, carrying her own tray. It was only the two of them with rows of tables around them, yet Seventh chose to place herself directly across from Ahsoka.

”Word is, someone threw a tantrum in the presence of the Emperor.” She continued, nonchalant, “I heard that a crew of maintenance droids had to fit the view to the crèche with a new window.”

Ahsoka said nothing, her grip on her utensil tightening.

”What?” Seventh asked, eyebrows rising, “You don’t like gossip? Too proud to talk to your _Sister_?”

”You’re trying to get a rise out of me.” Ahsoka forced her voice into calmness, “It won’t work.”

”With the way you’re acting so subdued...” Seventh stated, smirking, “I’d almost hasten to guess that _you_ had something to do with it.”

When Ahsoka said nothing, Seventh continued, “By the way, Lord Vader has returned to Coruscant.”

Ahsoka sighed, set down her utensil and looked up.

”Ah,” Seventh intoned, “I knew _that_ would get your attention.”

She continued, satisfactorily, ”I can tell you’d like to know how I came across the information. Lord Vader often comes and goes at his whim, never preparing any of us for his arrival. But I’m never caught off guard because I have insight that the others do not.”

Coyly she added, “I’ll share with you how I get my information, but of course, it’s going to cost you.”

”What could I _possibly_ give you?” Ahsoka asked, incredulous.

”Let me think...” Seventh pretended to consider it, tapping her chin with a single, sharp finger. “Ahh, yes... resources I am restricted.”

Ahsoka raised a single brow-marking.

”What do you mean?” She asked. “If you can’t get your hands on something, I doubt _I’d_ be able to.”

“... I’m working on something; something separate from my duties as an Inquisitor, but I see it complimenting my work greatly in the future.” Seventh explained. She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table and drumming the pads of her fingers together as she further explained, “Unfortunately, I lack the necessary materials to move forward. If you were to request certain tech, I have a feeling Vader would acquiesce to you in a way that he wouldn’t to the rest of us. So, what do you say? Do we have a deal?”

”... I’ve made one too many deals today.” Ahsoka responded, shaking her head. She returned her focus to her meal and continued, “I can’t help you.”

Seventh silently fumed. Ahsoka expected her to get up and move away, or maybe storm out entirely. Instead, she continued to appeal.

”You’re making a mistake. I know a great many things that go on inside of this building, things you would be eager to know about.”

Ahsoka couldn’t dislodge her curiosity. Relenting, she looked up once more, gaze careful but considering. Seventh smiled, sickly sweet.

” _What_ things? How do you get your information?” Ahsoka asked, patience waning. She hadn’t sensed a lie or a deceit of any kind in Seventh’s words, just thinly concealed desperation. She surmised that Seventh wanted... to protect herself from the others, from Vader. Her slight frame and lack of skill had made her an easy target in the past, it appeared. Ahsoka eyed her throat covered by the high collar of her suit, and felt a sudden, sharp shame at how she’d behaved before. She’d mocked this Inquisitor, this person who’d been stripped of their identity and remade. It wasn’t this girl’s fault she’d become so viscous. So far as Ahsoka knew, she’d been taken and tortured and turned into what she was now just like most of the rest.

” _This_ is how.” Seventh responded, glad to have recaptured Ahsoka’s interest. She pointed up...

Ahsoka tilted her head, found the device she’d believed to be an alarm system upon entry detach itself from the ceiling and float down. It was a tiny droid, red eyed with arms that dropped out of its belly as it flew to Seventh’s shoulder. Ahsoka blinked as it made grasping gestures at her with its clawed appendages. A droid hidden in plain sight, the likes of which Ahsoka had never seen before. The Seventh Sister must have invented them herself.

 _A_ _spy droid._

”You were watching me.” Ahsoka accused, “That’s how you knew about the crèche.”

”I was.” Seventh acknowledged, sounding pleased. She patted her companion on its top as if it were a pet. “But you aren’t the only one I watch.”

“... You’re risking a lot by telling me this.” Ahsoka said, “And you can’t be sure I won’t inform Vader.”

”It wouldn’t be in your best interest, if you did.” Seventh said defensively. “I could tell you things not even _Lord Vader_ himself knows. I’m sure of it.”

”Then tell me.” Ahsoka said, “And I’ll decide what I do.”

Seventh slid her gaze from Ahsoka to her droid, who hovered down and between them a moment later. It displayed a red holo, a set of numbers in a line...

“What is this?” Ahsoka asked, frowning.

Seventh smirked and said, ”The access codes to the first antechamber in the crèche.”  
  
Ahsoka’s eyes widened significantly.

”How did you...?” She ventured, voice tapering as she memorized the code.

Seventh nodded her head to the droid in explanation.

Ahsoka couldn’t conceal her awe, didn’t even try to. Seventh was like Anakin, in a way; prodigious, able to construct something out of the seemingly nothing around her. “How many droids do you have?”

”... Just the one.” Seventh admitted, “But I hope to have more in the future. As you are now aware, it’s an unsanctioned side project of mine. This is why I need your help. You’ll retrieve the tech that I cannot. For every droid you help me build, I’ll give you the access codes to all the rooms in the crèche, as well as the hours of all of the nursemaids’ shifts.”

Ahsoka thought about it, all the ways it could backfire. But if she had those access codes, it would make retrieving the children much easier when she escaped with Anakin and, if she could trust her, Barriss, too.

”If I ask Vader for whatever it is you need,” Ahsoka began after a moment, “It’s almost certainly going to garner his suspicion. I know you think he’d allocate to me, but I have to disagree - I don’t believe he’d be willing to just _give_ _me_ whatever I ask for.”

”He brought you to his personal chambers.” Seventh deadpanned, leveling her with an exasperated look. “Lord Vader doesn’t extend his trust to just anyone in that way - but he trusted you enough to bring you there, following your trial. So, suffice to say, I have faith in your abilities.”

”... Make me a list of everything you need.” Ahsoka relented begrudgingly, “I’ll see what I can do.”

”Glad we could have this little talk.” Seventh smiled, all teeth. The droid took her untouched tray and disposed of it in the waste retainer. She held out her hand to Ahsoka, tilted her head and asked, one brow rising in question, “... _Partner?_ ”

Ahsoka eyed her hand, grimaced, but shook it.

”Wait.” Ahsoka said as Seventh stood to leave, her droid undoing one of the vents in the wall and slipping inside, closing it back up behind them as they disappeared from view.

Seventh turned back, surprised, and asked, “What?”

”How did you get the access codes to the crèche so quickly?” Ahsoka questioned, shaking her head. “You couldn’t have retrieved them and the nursemaids’ operating hours within the time it took me to leave their floor and get to the mess hall. You would have had to have been spying on them for much longer than their existence was made known and relevant to me.”

To Ahsoka’s utter disbelief, Seventh responded, modulated voice sounding as vulnerable as was probably capable,

”Well... who doesn’t want to be a mother?”

And then she was gone, and Ahsoka was left to wonder about the meaning behind her words.

* * *

Vader appeared to Ahsoka in the evening. She felt him before she saw him, arms crossed, observing from one of the doors that spilled into the training area. She flew through katas, clutching non-existent blade as she moved. Partway through her second round of forms, Ahsoka felt him toss an object her way. She caught it mid-air, paused to look at what he’d thrown.

 _Her old saber_.

”Proceed.” He said when she turned to him, a question in her gaze.

Ahsoka did so after a moment of hesitation, taking a few seconds to readjust her stance. She placed both hands around the hilt, activated the blade and began again. By the time she’d finished, she was sweating. She took a moment to catch her breath, deactivated the saber and held it out.

”I thought I’d forget those stances.” She confessed as Vader finally approached. “I’m... severely out of practice.”

Vader stopped feet before her, arms still crossed. Ahsoka eyed him, held the lightsaber out a little more. He made no further moves.

”... It is yours.” He said simply, refusing to take it. Ahsoka frowned.

”You’re really trusting me with this?” She questioned, caught off guard, “You don’t think I’ll run off and leave with it?”

”It would be unwise if you did.”

Ahsoka lowered her arm uncertainly. Was this a test? She went to clip the hilt to her belt, only to remember she didn’t have a mount. Holding onto it, she looked up at Vader. He didn’t speak, simply stood there, watching her.

”Something on your mind?” She asked him, as casually as she could manage, “How did... Mon Cala go?”

“Successfully.” Was his perfunctory response. Ahsoka nodded absently. He asked after a beat,

”What did the Emperor want you for?”

Ahsoka took a deep breath, weighing her options. There had to be a reason Sidious hadn’t told Vader about what he’d planned. Would it be foolish to be honest with him? She wasn’t sure how he would react, if he would react at all.

”He needs me to... _unlock_ something for him.” She relented, deciding honesty with as minimal detail as possible would have to suffice.

”Unlock?” Vader questioned, “ _Unlock_ what?”

Ahsoka bit her cheek, hesitantly answered, “Something to do with memories. It’s... something I don’t remember myself.”

”What memory?” He pressed.

Ahsoka huffed. Somehow, the dark side had made him even _more_ obstinatea person. She responded, her own arms crossing, “Why don’t you just ask him yourself, if you’re so curious?”

Vader took a warning step forward, voice low as he spoke, ”Do not make me ask again.”

Ahsoka sighed. Fed up, she relented, “It’s... something to do with _Mortis_.”

Vader’s breathing apparatus made a funny noise then, almost as if it had momentarily malfunctioned. He ordered, clipped,

” _Explain_.”

”I _can’t_.” Ahsoka said helplessly, not out of unwillingness but out of an inability. Though Sidious had explained it to her, it still didn’t quite make sense. She couldn’t sense if his words had been dishonest, but no part of her doubted a truth had been concealed. “It was something to do with a gap in my memory but I... I don’t _remember_ what it is he showed me, and-”

” _Showed_ you?” Vader interrupted, “Showed you _what_? _How_?”

”I’m _getting_ there.” Ahsoka grit, “ _Patience_.”

Vader seemed to grumble, but nonetheless stopped talking long enough for her to continue,

”There’s... something at the bottom of the Temp- I mean, the Palace. Some kind of altar. I didn’t-”

”A Sith shrine.” Vader supplied. “I know of this.”

” _Of course you do_.” Ahsoka huffed, rolling her eyes. “Anyway, he brought me there, and he started some sort of ritual. It... it brought out a memory I didn’t know I had. You... _were there_. It was you before you were...”

She gestured vaguely at his suit. When he said nothing, she continued, quietly,

”You were talking to me, telling me to snap out of something. You told me I wasn’t being myself.”

For a long, long time, Vader said nothing. When he did speak, it nearly startled her after the prolonged silence.

”He showed you your corruption at the hands of the Son.” He said, “He showed you your possession by the dark side.”

Ahsoka blinked, uncomprehending.

”... _What_?” She asked faintly.

”On that world,” Vader answered, “You were taken by the Son, somehow infected and forced to succumb to his influence. You... died as a result.”

Ahsoka stepped back, reeling. Vader watched her impassively. She clutched her head, struggling...

”I sense the truth in your words, but... I don’t _remember_.” She whispered, dismayed.

Anakin had... fallen to the dark side, too, on that mysterious world. She could remember _that_. But the reason for it had never been revealed or elaborated to her. Had the Son infected him, too? Did he remember it happening? Those moments had been so intense and strange and... they’d never found the time to talk about it, afterward. The war had been one battle after the next after the next and it had left them very little room to just be able to _sit_ and _talk_. Even in those final moments before everything had fallen apart, the timing had never been more wrong.

Constantly, they’d evaded one another.

”... I do not understand the Emperor’s motivations.” Vader began after another long moment. “Explaining to you what happened is... and _was_... simpler. Now you know what is forgotten, even if the memory is obscured. Why does he...?”

Vader tilted his head, turned on his heel so abruptly it nearly gave Ahsoka whiplash.

”Where are you going?” She asked, not expecting him to answer; and he didn’t, disappearing promptly and entirely from her sight within a matter of seconds.

* * *

“This visit is highly irregular, Lord Vader.” Sidious said, settled upon his throne. The hour was late and most of the Palace staff had retired for the night. “Moff Tarkin has already briefed me on the outcome of Mon Cala. It is... unfortunate that the Tenth Inquisitor did not survive. But his sacrifice brought you victory, and so I commend you on a job well-”

”My Master,” Vader interrupted, rising from the knee he’d taken upon entry, “You have not been forthcoming with me.”

Sidious said nothing. Beneath the drawn hood of his robe, his stunned expression remained hidden. Vader felt anger rising within himself as the silence prolonged.

”If this is what you’ve summoned me here to discuss...” Sidious eventually began, “Then it appears I must spoil the surprise.”

Vader faltered. Sidious rose from his throne, stepped down and before him. An arm emerged from the sleeve of his robe, settled around Vader’s back, guiding him out of the throne room and down to the excavation site. 11-4D waited before two pods prepped and ready for departure.

”Come, Lord Vader.” His Master beckoned, “Descend with me, and I will explain myself to you.”

Vader entered one of the pods that would carry them down, taking the controls as Sidious entered another, 11-4D already at the navigation. 11-4D entered the opening in the floor first, leading them down. Vader followed swiftly behind. Despite having known of the existence of the shrine since excavation had begun, Vader had never any reason to enter or explore what lay below. He did not know what to expect. There was a feeling deep within him, not unusual but not common, either. It was uncertainty. It did not bode well for the young Sith to be excluded from his Master’s plans.

”I bring us to a door.” Sidious began after several minutes, voice arriving over the speaker in Vader’s pod, “But it is locked. _Ahsoka Tano_ is the key that will allow us entry.”

“A door?” Vader asked. His Master continued,

”You must understand now, why it was imperative we reclaim the Jedi Temple. They’d taken from us long ago a relic, tried to bury our heritage beneath their marbled halls. What they didn’t know was that the dark side, no matter how far buried, always prevails. For a thousand years this shrine the Jedi had built over grew, reaching ever upward, struggling against the vileness of the Jedi and their religion. The Jedi had believed the Sith gone, and it left them complacent, left them susceptible. They turned a blind eye to the _real_ problems that our galaxy faced.”

”But we have brought peace and justice.” Vader said, “The galaxy no longer suffers under the rule of the Jedi.”

”Yes.” Sidious agreed. “It is unfortunate, however, that there are some who do not view it that way.”

”The fledging rebellion.” Vader remarked.

”Indeed.” His Master responded, “To make those who oppose us see reason, we must accomplish something that has never before been attempted. We must open a bridge between time and space.”

”... And Tano can achieve this?” Vader questioned, skeptical.

”Precisely.” His Master responded, “She was imbued with darkness and infected with light on a world that, until you’d confirmed it’s existence, was once only rumored to be in the wild spaces. Tano holds the energies of two Force deities, and thus the power to bring us beyond the tangible realm.”

”Then she is unaware of what you truly plan.” Vader comprehended, hearing the words his Master did not speak.

”...Yes.” Sidious said carefully, “But it is _necessary_ she remain unaware. Tano would never agree to helping us, if she knew what was really plotted. She clings to the ideals of the Jedi. It is necessary we break her of that narrow-minded view. Perhaps the rituals will help her see reason.”

Sidious led them deeper into the heart of what remained of the Sith’s Temple. They came to face an altar, a smooth stone inscribed with ancient text. Dried against the stone slab that sat between two obelisks was blood. Vader stared at it for a long time. Sidious eventually spoke,

”I sense your reservation. You aren’t certain swaying Tano to our side in this way will work.”

”... When she was turned by the Son,” Vader began, never looking away from the altar, “She became frenzied and chaotic, willful and disobedient. I believe that there is a risk she would not live to serve under an influence that she is not willing to accept on her own.”

”If that is the case...” Sidious sighed, “Then we will simply end her life after she has opened the door to the other world. I will have no use of her after that. She will have served her purpose.”

Vader finally turned to face his Master, a question in his posture. Sidious smiled and said,

”Through Tano, through the power she can supply, we will have finally unlocked the secret to cheat death.”

Vader’s heart turned over.

” _Padmé_.” He gasped, voice breaking, “ _How_?”

”In the world Tano unlocks for us.” Sidious answered. “When we enter the realm she opens, the ability to reach backwards or forwards in time will be made available. Anywhere we desire to change and bend reality, we can do so. You will be able to save the one you love.”

Vader’s hands curled into fists. Behind his mask, his eyes steeled and his brow hardened. He nodded his head once in understanding and made his way back to his pod, departing without another word.

Unbeknownst to him, Sidious watched him go, a wicked smile curling his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (the line that seventh sister uttered to ahsoka in Rebels during their fight scene (the one that I re-employed here) was so bonkers, but it left me wondering if what she’d said didn’t hold some clue to her personality, before she’d been made into an inquisitor. of course, her line could’ve just been something she’d quipped in the moment but... why that? of all the things to fire back at ahsoka, why say *that*? it seemed so strange, but it made me think that the person she was before she’d been an inquisitor might’ve been someone with an inclination for child care/someone who had good parental instincts. so I’m going to explore further her character through that line)
> 
> \+ also, notice the tags have changed a bit. I’ve added some tags and taken others away. nothing was set in stone before because I’m indecisive as a person and the layout for this AU was constantly evolving, but what you see before you now is here to stay. things may get added later but beyond that, nothing else is being removed. thank you!


	12. Rescue pt. III

Imperial presence had waned on Raada. Rex infiltrated the moon with ease - a suspicious amount of it, actually, if he were being honest. But after Morai appeared through the viewport when he entered atmosphere, guiding him down to land in the clearing of a forest, Rex understood that the ease with which he’d infiltrated the moon was most likely her doing.

Somehow, she’d helped him.

After a short trek through the forest, Rex discovered Ahsoka’s ship and, within it, a sack with two cylindrical objects. _Lightsaber hilts_ , he realized. They appeared incomplete. Sure enough, when Rex tried to activate them, nothing happened. He put them back in their pouch, handed them off to R7 and instructed,

”Take this back to the ship and rendezvous with the Senator.”

R7 beeped an inquiry.

”No, I’m not going with you. Morai has other plans for me, it seems.”

He’d spotted the convor again - she’d perched herself on the branch of a tree outside the ship’s viewport, fluttering her wings, insistent she follow him once more.

R7 cooed solemnly.

”I’ll be okay.” Rex assured the astromech, “Tell the Senator not to worry, that I’ll find a way to contact him when I’ve found more clues. Got it?”

R7 beeped a reluctant confirmation before hesitantly turning and departing. Rex watched them go until they were out of sight, then watched the sky until he saw R7 fly the ship up and away. He approached Morai a moment after. She’d been waiting.

”Alright...” He started, feeling a little ridiculous, but trusting she wouldn’t lead him astray. She hadn’t so far. “What’s next?”

Morai flapped her wings urgently, flying just low enough so he could keep her in his line of sight. She led him out of the forest and into a town. He stopped at the edge of the forest, watching as she swooped down to a Storm Trooper making their patrol. She landed on their helmeted head, began pecking at their lenses.

”You crazy bird!” They shouted, trying to throw her off, “Leave me alone!”

Rex sighed deeply. He understood what Morai wanted him to do.

* * *

“How the hell do they aim in these things?” Rex asked later, blaster in hands, decked from head to toe in Storm Trooper regalia. He’d knocked the one Morai had chosen unconscious, had dragged them back to Ahsoka’s ship to take their armor. Now he finished their patrol, relying on his knowledge of GAR protocol, hoping some of it had still stuck. He made his way back to base in time for the swap, thanking his luck that he’d made it as far as he had.

He hoped, as he continued to go undetected, that the trooper he’d switched places with wouldn’t wake before he made it off world.

It was pure luck that, as he made his way into the barracks, a voice filtered over the intercom in his helmet, “Troopers class 1 to 14, you are being redeployed to Coruscant effective immediately.”

”Hey,” One of the other troopers near him said, slapping him on the shoulder in passing. Their voice wasn’t familiar - they weren’t a brother. “Looks like we’re headed home.”

 _You had something to do with this_ , Rex would think later of Morai, chuckling. He made his way to a shuttle ready to take them to the Star Destroyer that lingered above the moon. He caught sight of Morai as they departed. She sat perched on a clothes line sitting outside of someone’s abandoned home. She chirped at him as he passed, took to her wings and flew until she was invisible to his eyes. Rex took a deep breath as he made his way from to the transport and then, after, to the Star Destroyer.

 _I just need to keep up the ruse until I find Ahsoka_ , he reminded himself, heart thudding as he filed with the other troopers out of the hangar bay and into the ships halls. _Just a little while longer_.

The ship entered hyperspace not long after. Rex made his way to records database, sold a convincing lie to the troopers stationed there that an emergency meeting had been called about transmission malfunctions.

”I did notice the intercoms have been fuzzy, lately.” One remarked, tapping their helmet.

”Yeah. Word is we’re supposed to get upgrades soon.” Another said, “Let’s head out.”

Rex filed in line with them at the back, edging himself further and further away as they continued on foot down the hall. Once they were out of sight, he hurried back into the database room, sliced his way into records using the General’s access code, praying it still worked. It was all he had. Thankfully, and to his immense disbelief, it _did_.

He searched for a very specific trooper.

 _CC-2224_.

”Gotcha.” He said triumphantly when the file loaded. _Stationed on military operations on Coruscant_ , was the most recent update Rex read. That meant Cody was at GAR headquarters... or rather, whatever GAR headquarters passed for, these days.

Next, he looked up CC-3636. _Stationed on the mid-rim,_ he read, _serving under the High Admiral Coburn to maintain order over the Wookie planet Kashyyyk_.

”Getting you out is gonna be a little more difficult, Wolffe.” Rex sighed.

Last, on a whim, Rex looked up his own designation, CT-7567.

 _KIA_ , the latest - and last - report read. Rex didn’t waste time reading the rest. He exited out of everything he’d read, remembering how to clear out his slicing the way General Skywalker had taught him so long ago and fell into the shadows of the ship, lying in wait for the moment they touched down upon Coruscant.


	13. Rend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so sorry.

* * *

_when will it come back again?_

_the small flower that never had a chance to blossom?_

_the time permitted for the stars to be in the night sky is erasing you away._

_even if I run endlessly while going against fate, the petals redden soundlessly._

_they scatter in the wind..._

_you fall and fade, just like that._

* * *

There was one less Inquisitor in the training arena the next morning, and one of Ninth’s legs was gone, replaced with bionic appendage. She dueled Sixth, aiming for his limbs, snarling every time he moved just out of reach, taunting him to get him back into her grasp.

”Sixth apparently left her for dead, after taking her leg on Mon Cala.” Seventh commented.

Ahsoka sparred with Seventh, had been for the last half hour. Their engaging was less a battle and more an excuse to discuss Ahsoka’s progress regarding her obtaining of the tech - of which there was none. And so their conversation had sidetracked, dipping into other areas. Seventh leaned in as their blades locked and sing-songed, “ _She’s going to take her revenge_. What do you wanna bet she’ll halve both of his legs off before the morning is over?”

”I don’t have anything to wager.” Ahsoka responded, disturbed at Seventh’s casual exuberance. She pushed against her blade, pushed her back. Seventh came rushing forward again after stumbling, suggesting between her strikes,

“Your ration packs for the next two nights?”

”No way.” Ahsoka shook her head, “That’s the only thing worth eating around here.”

And even then they were still pretty terrible.

Seventh smirked, but then her expression went blank. Ahsoka caught her gaze fix to the wall above her head, turned to find her spy droid gesturing urgently at the door from their perch in an air duct. Ahsoka sensed what it warned Seventh about; Vader was on his way.

”Masks up.” Seventh said, face plate sliding over her features as she stood at attention. Ahsoka’s did the same. They retracted their sabers, but the others were slow on the uptake. They were caught off guard when Vader finally entered the room, scrabbling to disengage from their fights as he drew his saber, igniting it.

Beside her, Seventh let out a modulated sigh, reignited her saber with the rest of them and to Ahsoka said, “Training day. Stay vigilant.”

And then it was into the fray. Vader fought the Inquisitors with an ease and a savagery Ahsoka couldn’t say she hadn’t known him capable of, just hadn’t known he’d ever employ. He disarmed with an effortlessness that spoke of his quiet rage. His aggression was controlled, refined - but it was there. Ahsoka felt the anger rising in the room, the way it was affecting her. She stayed out of the fight for as long as possible, but there was soon no other option but to clash blades. He reigned down upon her like the terror he was as their blades locked, unrelenting in his strength. 

Ahsoka nearly lost her footing when he bore down his weight. He’d always been physically strong, but what she was faced with now was almost inhuman. She couldn’t hold this forever, she knew. His blade came dangerously close to her face. Realizing there was no getting out of this, and that he wasn’t going to ease up, Ahsoka dropped. She hit the floor, and he - caught off guard by her sudden lack of resistance - fell with her. Pushing him off with both of her feet, muscles straining from the effort it took, Vader flew up and back...

... landed perfectly on his feet. Ahsoka huffed, edged her way back. She kept her grip reversed, as it was most familiar. For a tense few seconds, neither of them made a move, simply prowled their way around the arena, never revealing their backs to the other. Ahsoka felt something she hadn’t before within him, a desperate anger she couldn’t understand or place. She puzzled over this, and in her momentary distraction he attacked.

It took everything in her to keep up. This wasn’t fighting the Inquisitors, or even Maul. This wasn’t what it had been like to fight Ventress or Grevious or the Separatists tinnies. This was fighting a friend, a friend who’s intent felt no less than a promised threat, an intent to maim and harm. Ahsoka realized too late her mistake in believing he would spare her the treatment he’d subjected the other Inquisitors to when his blade crashed and slid across her own, too fast for her to do anything, and then rent down and through her right leg, just above the knee.

Ahsoka didn’t scream, didn’t cry out. The shock rendered her speechless, incapable of making sound entirely. She fell, balance thrown, hit the floor with a dull thud. Her mask retracted upon impact, revealing her face...

Her saber rolled out of her grasp.

The pain was excruciating, and it left no blood. Ahsoka didn’t look down, knowing if she did she would black out from the pain. Instead, she kept her gaze fixedly up. She breathed through her nose, mouth screwed resolutely shut. Above her, Vader’s frame came into view. He deactivated his saber, stared down at her...

Ahsoka looked into the lenses of his helmet, startled to find that, if she looked at him at just the right angle, and the lighting was right as it was there, she could see his eyes.

They were not, she discovered, the hideous, poisonous color she’d imagined them to be. Instead, they were as she remembered them to be. From before.

They were _blue_.

* * *

Ahsoka didn’t recall after she’d woken up strapped to an operating table how she’d gotten from the training arena to the infirmary. Everything blurred together in her memory, and then she’d been put under so the doctor droids could operate, and woken later with a new leg, it’s plating a dull grey. Ahsoka stared at it now, still coming down from the high of the medication they’d pumped into her to get her to sleep. She couldn’t feel the pain, but she could feel, even with the new appendage, that something there was missing.

”How could you do this?” Ahsoka asked him when he finally fell into her line of sight, her words slightly slurred. She blinked drowsily as he studied the mechanics.

”There is... nothing.” Vader said after a moment, finally looking at her. “There is no anger in you, no hate. There was only the pain before and now...”

He didn’t finish, but he didn’t have to. Ahsoka understood that to which he referred. The _nothingness_ permeated her entire being. She felt empty, void of emotion. He’d recognized it. And it angered him.

”The one person I’d never thought would hurt me just hurt me.” Ahsoka responded. She closed her eyes, trying to blot him from existence with that simple act. “But I can’t hate you for it. You’ve done worse to so many others. It’s just a leg. At least it wasn’t my life.”

She felt her throat close. Panic momentarily made her jerk at the sensation of the phantom hand around her neck. Her eyes opened, found him as she’d expected him to be, with hand raised, fingers curled around nothing. She didn’t try to resist or fight back, her own hands bound as they were. The effort would have been pointless, anyway. Instead, she stared at him, eyes watering, vision spotting...

He released her. She sucked in the air that had been denied, coughed from the strain. Vader grappled just beyond. His anger, in comparison to her emptiness, was pronounced and all-encompassing. It shook the room, rattled the walls and the table on which she lie. Ahsoka took his raging emotions in stride, let them remind her again how to feel.

”Anakin.” She choked out, thick tears catching in her eyes before cascading down her temples and onto the table below, “ _Please_ , stop.”

It was gradual, but he did. Everything that had fallen and spilled and caved in on itself came to a standstill. Vader slumped back, falling into a chair sitting just behind him. His helmeted head fell right into his palm. His shoulders heaved with his every breath.

”You keep _resisting_.” He agonized, words muddled as they labored through the vocoder, “This was not how you were meant to react. I need you _angry_. I need your _hate_. You were supposed to _suffer_. This _pain_ was meant to be a teacher. Without the dark side, you are as good as _dead_.”

”... There’s another way.” Ahsoka tried weakly, bound hand reaching futilely out for him. “There’s _always_ another way.”

”There is no other way!” He bellowed, rising back onto his feet so quickly it made her flinch.

Ahsoka breathed shallowly, shaking her head. She felt Vader’s anger threaten to rise all over again. Quietly she asked,

”What is it? There’s something else you aren’t saying. If you tell me, then maybe I can help.”

She fully expected him to leave her, to squander what little remained of her faith in him right then and there. But to her astonishment, he stepped up to her side. One gloved hand came down to rest just beside her own bound one. She stared into the lenses of his mask once more, dejected to find she could no longer see his eyes. She regarded him with no emotion, too afraid the slightest reveal in her face would scare him away. When he spoke, the sound of it was so strange.

”You... you possess an ability, a way to bring back those who have been lost to death. My Master claims you can open a door to a world that will allow me reach back in time. I can save Padmé. I can save my mother. I can reshape the galaxy. I only need you to bring me there.”

Ahsoka said nothing for a long time, processing his words. She blinked once, her brow-line furrowing.

”... How?” She asked simply, “How do I do it?”

”It remains to be seen.” Vader responded, “But my Master will guide you to where you need to be.”

”He told you I can... can bring them _back_?” She questioned, confused and overwhelmed. She’d heard about what had happened to Padmé after... after everything, that a couple of rogue Jedi had slain her, that she’d been... _pregnant_... that the child had died with her. Of course, that had been the _Empire’s_ official statement. Even if the murder had been a fabricated lie, the pregnancy... her family on Naboo had confirmed it. That part had been real.

There’d been no question in Ahsoka’s mind as to who the father was. Realizing that Anakin and Padmé were going to have a baby, that Padmé and the child had died together... it left her wondering, _Is that what had pushed Anakin off the deep end? Is that why he’d turned to the dark side?_

Ahsoka hadn’t wanted to believe the report when she’d read it, that the ‘ _rogue_ , _traitorous’_ Jedi had slain her on the day of Order 66, but... maybe there had been some truth to what Vader had claimed, to what the Empire had issued. Maybe the Jedi, or at least a select few, had plotted to murder the Chancellor, overthrow the Republic and reform it under a new vision. Even if their actions were justified - they had to have discovered Palpatine’s identity to go that far - it arguably _was_ unconstitutional. Instead of for raising the alarm that a Sith Lord had been governing the Republic, Ahsoka suspected someone had tried to take matters into their own hands. It would explain so much... it would explain why she hadn’t sensed a lie in Vader’s words, when he’d claimed what he had days before about the Jedi attempting to assassinate Palpatine and the Senators.

His _mother_... Ahsoka didn’t know that story, not very well. Anakin had never been willing to open up or share with her hardly _anything_ about his past. Though no one in the Temple grew up without hearing one tale or another about the prophesied Chosen One, there’d never been any lingering detail to what his life had been like before he’d arrived. Ahsoka had only known the basics before Obi-Wan and then, later, Anakin himself had informed her of his and his mother’s past as slaves.

”What happens if I can bring them back?” Ahsoka eventually asked, weary, “What aren’t you telling me?”

”... If you do not turn to the dark side,” Vader eventually said, “Then you will die. My Master has decreed this. _This_...”

He lowered his helmeted head slowly. His fingers that rested beside her own curled into a shaking fist.

”This is _all there is_.”

* * *

_even if I run endlessly to go against my fate,_

_the petals redden disorderly, they scatter in the wind._

_they fall off lonesomely..._

_you fall and fade, just like that._

* * *

\- “You, Just Like That” (Blade & Soul OST)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the opening and close to this chapter are the translated lyrics to a really heartbreaking song written by Yoon Sang and performed by Kang Seulgi for a video game OST called Blade & Soul. I’ve attached the link to where you can watch the performance below. I definitely recommend checking it out. Listening to it and thinking of the lyrics and how they could be interpreted as a metaphor for Vader and his relationships/describe his headspace might make you cry as it made me 😢 
> 
> [you, just like that](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FojoqJtBucU)
> 
> Darth Vader’s line “This is all there is.” is directly taken from the comic book issue Darth Vader #5 (the moment was so intense and very... Vader. I don’t know how else to describe it. The line was just very him and I wanted to reference it.)


	14. Ruminations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chapter 14, otherwise known as “in which ahsoka tano cannot catch a kriffing break”

It was late evening. The buzzer in her room sounded. Ahsoka sat up on her bedroll, thinking it was Barriss and called, “Come in.”

The door slid back, revealing Seventh Sister.

”What a _revelation_.” She said in greeting, stepping in without further invite, door shutting close behind her. She took up a seat across from Ahsoka, cross-legged. Ahsoka huffed and pulled herself back to prop against the wall.

For a long moment, neither of them spoke, just regarded one another in contemplative silence. Ahsoka noted Seventh, for the first time since meeting her, seemed at a loss for what to say.

”I don’t have your parts.” Ahsoka eventually began. “If that’s why you’re here.”

”On the contrary...” Seventh remarked, nodding at her new leg, “You might.”

”You can’t be serious.” Ahsoka scoffed. Seventh reached for her leg. Ahsoka moved it back, the effort clunky. She still hadn’t quite figured out how to bend the knee without some mild strain.

”You want those access codes?” Seventh asked, raising her brows. “Don’t be _stingy_ , Thirteenth.”

Ahsoka closed her eyes, shook her head. After a long moment, she extended her leg and sighed, “Knock yourself out.”

Seventh went to work immediately, prying open panels Ahsoka didn’t know could come apart. She looted through the inner workings, surveying and humming as she studied whatever lie inside. Ahsoka couldn’t feel any of it, not the way she would have if the leg had been real. All that registered was the occasional jostling when Seventh shifted her leg up or to the side. Eventually...

”So, there’s a few parts I think you can live without.” Seventh said, “A lot is essential, though, and you’ll definitely feel the difference when they’re gone.”

”So long as my leg doesn’t fall apart as soon as I stand up...” Ahsoka said, voice lacking inflection, “Then it doesn’t matter.”

Seventh nodded, touched a button on her wrist communicator. Into the room through the air duct in the ceiling emerged Seventh’s spy droid.

”This will take a few minutes.” Seventh informed as the droid started rooting through the leg. “You might want to make yourself comfortable.”

Ahsoka did as instructed. She lied down, threw an arm over her face and tried not to think. But it was impossible. She thought of Padmé. She thought of Obi-Wan. She thought, _it says a lot about how things must’ve ended between them, for Anakin to not mention wanting to save him as well._ But maybe he’d dropped an unintentional clue; maybe Obi-Wan had survived the purge. He _had_ sent the encrypted signal, after all, but he also hadn’t reached out to her calls through the Force following her discovering it. Ahsoka had believed him, just as she’d believed Anakin, for so long to be dead. But Anakin lived, serving the Empire. Could that mean Obi-Wan had lived as well?

“You’re thinking _awfully_ loud.” Seventh commented.

”You can sense all that?” Ahsoka asked, mildly alarmed.

”Not what you’re thinking, _exactly_... more along the lines of the feelings produced by it.”

When Ahsoka didn’t respond, Seventh continued,

”I did warn you about Lord Vader. Though I must admit, I _am_ surprised at his actions. Ninth is never wrong about other people’s emotions. I suppose there is a first time for everything, though. Do you think you’ll still be able to get the parts I need?”

”Honestly? I’m not sure.” Ahsoka responded, “I didn’t think I had much of a chance to begin with, but now...”

”Well, why don’t I help you out?” Seventh asked, and then Ahsoka felt something faintly _tug_. She shot up and looked down, startled to find Seventh’s droid had pulled a rather large spring loose. At her incredulous expression, the droid flew back and out of her grasp.

”What is that?” Ahsoka asked, brow-line lowering.

”A key component.” Seventh responded casually, collecting what little pieces she’d taken before in her hands, standing and making her way to the door as she continued, “I don’t actually need _that_ piece, but you don’t have enough parts right now. Inform the doctor droids that your leg is malfunctioning. They’ll re-supply you with the parts I’ve taken.”

”How am I going to explain this to them?” Ahsoka asked, incensed. She struggled to stand, to move with the now dead weight of her new limb.

”Someone is always losing a limb or needing an upgrade.” Seventh shrugged, stepping out through the door. “You won’t be suspicious, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

”Seventh!” Ahsoka yelled, “Come back here! You haven’t given me what you promised.”

”I said I’d give you an access code for every droid you helped me build.” Seventh threw over her shoulder, getting further and further away. “ _Not_ for every piece of tech you managed to secure. We shook on it. _Remember_?”

Ahsoka wanted to protest, but Seventh slid down the hall, disappearing from sight, and Ahsoka couldn’t keep up well enough to follow. Though she tried, she fell onto her knee. She managed to pull herself back up in time to find Barriss hurrying her way.

”Ahsoka-!” She gasped, offering her hands. Ahsoka grasped on, allowed Barriss guide her to the nearest lift. Inside, Barriss asked,

”Are you in pain?”

” _Yes_.” Ahsoka said, “Though it’s not the kind you’re thinking of.”

”Oh, Ahsoka...” Barriss said sympathetically, her eyes moving from the prosthesis to her face, “I’m _so sorry_.”

* * *

It took little time for the doctor droids to fix her leg. Discharged for the second time that day, Ahsoka walked from the infirmary with Barriss at her side. 

“Where are you during the day?” Ahsoka asked her as they walked, aimlessly, through the building. “Where do you go?”

”I’m stationed with the other attendants.” Barriss said, “Why do you ask?”

”... Because I’m going to leave this place.” Ahsoka said, “And soon. I’ll need to know where to find you when I do.”

”That’s... that’s _risky_ , Ahsoka.”

”It’s better than wallowing away in this place.” Ahsoka responded. She stopped walking. Barriss stopped with her. She turned to Barriss and continued, “I want to trust you again, Barriss, so I’m telling you this.”

”When do you plan to leave?” Barriss asked quietly, “Where... where will you go?”

”Anywhere but here.”

”... How will we get out?”

Ahsoka breathed a sigh of relief and answered, “Anakin. He’ll help us.”

”... _Anakin_?” Barriss asked faintly, “He... survived?”

Ahsoka frowned, searched Barriss’s confused eyes and asked,

”You really don’t know?”

”Know what?”

”Anakin... he’s... he’s _Vader_.”

Barriss’s eyes widened. Her lips parted. Her brow knit sharply together.

”What? _How_?”

”I don’t know.” Ahsoka sighed, shrugging helplessly, “But its him. He revealed himself to me before he brought me here.”

”And you think he’ll help us?” Barriss asked disbelievingly. She protested, “Ahsoka, he’s... he’s turned to the _dark side_!”

”And he’s going to turn _back_.” Ahsoka said, voice hardening, “I’m not leaving here until he does.”

Barriss searched her face, her head shaking faintly back and forth as she said,

”Ahsoka... Ahsoka, I don’t think-”

” _You_ came back!” Ahsoka cut her off, insistent, “So don’t you stand there and tell me that he can’t, too!”

”Ahsoka...” Barriss said, dismayed, “Do you... do you have any idea what he does? What he _did_?”

She gestured at Ahsoka’s new leg and continued, “Look at what he did to you!”

Ahsoka took a deep breath, looked away. Bitter tears stung her eyes.

”And you didn’t do the same?” She asked, voice breaking, “ _You_ didn’t kill people? _You_ didn’t hurt _me_? Didn’t hurt _others_ , too?”

“... Ahsoka.” Barriss said, tears rising to her own eyes, “That was-”

”Don’t you _even say_ ‘different’.” Ahsoka spat, “You murdered your own _just_ the same as him.”

”... I did.” Barriss gasped wetly, blinking rapidly, “I _did_. But I wasn’t given a _choice_.”

”What do you mean you weren’t given a choice?” Ahsoka asked derisively, “Are you trying to tell me someone else was behind the Temple bombing? You _confessed_!”

”I... I did confess. I _did_ bomb the Temple. I found the one who I could pin with the crime and make it seem believable, and then I went to his wife and I threatened her. I told her to find a way to sneak a bomb in with her husband. I felt _hate_ so _intense_. _Every day_. The war was prolonging and Master Unduli was... she was becoming _unrecognizable_ to me. _All_ of the Jedi were. We weren’t _ourselves_. And I felt it, I... and then _he_ found me.”

Ahsoka sucked in a breath, knowing instantly who _he_ was.

“I had no plans. I just knew something needed to be done, that it seemed as if I was the only one who was willing to do it. I spoke with Master Yoda, I tried to eradicate the thoughts but... _nothing_ was working. And then I felt this pull one night... I left the Temple and... I traveled here, before it was what it is now. And I met Palpatine. I understood instantly what he was, and I threatened to turn him over to the Jedi, but he...”

She wrapped her arms around herself, shuddered. She wouldn’t meet Ahsoka’s eyes when she continued,

”He threatened to kill everyone, if I didn’t listen. He told me no one would believe me, and I _knew_ he was right. I knew it wasn’t the right time, that if I did, things would end in the disaster he’d promised. I _saw_ it. I had no choice but to listen to him. He told me what to do, told me to find a way to do it. And so I did, and my mind unraveled in the process. It was like I was being _poisoned_. I recognized that everything I was doing was wrong but it... it felt, in the moment, like it was the only way to make the Council see how wrong the war was, how warped it had made them. I never... I _never_ imagined you would get involved, or feel so strongly about it. Palpatine came to me again after you and Master Skywalker returned to Coruscant, and he told me to implicate you in _everything_. He said he would take care of framing you, all I had to do was... but I didn’t _want_ to-”

” _Wait_.” Ahsoka interrupted, reeling, “Are you saying you _weren’t_ the one who put the key card in front of my cell?”

Barriss blinked at her.

”What?”

”You didn’t break into the prison?” Ahsoka asked, feeling herself numbing. “You didn’t kill Letta and all of those clones?”

” _No_ , Ahsoka, I...” Barriss shook her head, clear confusion in her eyes, “I never helped you out of prison. But when I found out you’d escaped... all I could think was that it was Palpatine. It _had_ to be.”

”... You aren’t lying.” Ahsoka laughed without humor, near hysterics, “You’re telling me the truth.”

Barriss only stared at her helplessly.

”We were all just pawns...” Ahsoka muttered, “Every single one of us just... played _right_ into his hands.”

She looked at Barriss.

”Some of us more willingly than others, it would seem.”

Barriss looked down, ashamed.

”Do you take it back, then?” She asked Ahsoka quietly, voice the faintest tremor, “Will you leave me here, when you go?”

Ahsoka’s chest squeezed.

” _No_ , Barriss.” She sighed, rubbing her forehead tiredly, “No, I won’t leave you here. I’m just... I’m dealing with a lot right now, and I don’t know how to process it all yet. I don’t think I’ll be able to until we’re far, _far_ away from Sidious and his influence.

”... Sidious?” Barriss asked.

”Palpatine. Sidious.” Ahsoka supplied, sighing as she ran her hands down her face, “Same person.”

”... Oh.” Barriss replied, “I wasn’t aware that he went by another name.”

“It’s his _Sith_ name.” Ahsoka said with derision.

“He’s keeping his true identity a secret, still? No one knows he’s a... a Sith?” Barriss wondered.

”If he didn’t,” Ahsoka reasoned, “Then the galaxy would turn on him. They’d realize why the Jedi had tried to assassinate him the day of Order 66 and revolt.”

”You really believe that?” Barriss asked, “That the Jedi tried to assassinate him?”

”I do.” Ahsoka nodded, “Though I don’t think I have the full story. I think someone must have figured Palpatine out, but instead of for telling the public when they did, they tried to take him out silently. I think that’s why they failed. The Jedi didn’t tell the galaxy about Palpatine being a Sith Lord because it would have made people question our abilities. And so someone... or maybe _several_ someone’s... tried to kill him silently, and it gave Sidious the excuse he needed to wipe us out.”

Barriss said nothing, silently taking that in.

“He’s going to _pay_ for what he did.” Ahsoka vowed, expression determined. “One way or another.”

”Be cautious, Ahsoka.” Barriss warned, “The last time you said that...”

”The last time I said that,” Ahsoka picked up where Barriss had trailed off, “You weren’t on my side. And that’s where everything went wrong. I can trust you now, right?”

”You can.” Barriss breathed, nodding vigorously, “Ahsoka, you _can_.”

”Then hold on a little while longer.” Ahsoka promised, “We’ll be out of here soon.”

”... Fifty-fourth floor.” Barriss said a moment later, “That’s where... that’s where you’ll find me, when you’re ready to leave.”

Ahsoka nodded, and together they resumed their walk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it was made known to me that I made an error in the previous chapter concerning what Ahsoka knew of Anakin’s mother Shmi - I didn’t catch it before I updated so I’m immensely grateful it was caught by another! as of 05/26/2020 it’s been fixed. 
> 
> (also thank you all for being so patient with me - I’ve made A LOT of errors while writing that I didn’t immediately catch before updating and have had to wade back in later after everyone read them, so I can’t thank you enough for your understanding)
> 
> \+ also, I included something to the opening of the prologue if you’d like to check it out!


	15. Resfeber

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hang onto your limbs and suspend your disbelief dear readers, it’s about to get metaphysical~

Ahsoka stood before the crèche’s window, her arms crossed, watching with abhorrence as the Nursemaids moved in their unnatural, jerky way as they handled the children. Vader stood behind her. He had been for some time. She tensed when she caught his form moving nearer in the glass’s reflection.

”It is time.” He said. Ahsoka took a deep breath, turned reluctantly away from the crèche and faced him. He held out his hand. Understanding what he demanded, she unclipped the saber from her belt and handed it over.

”I haven’t turned.” Ahsoka said as he took it, “I _won’t_ turn. Does this mean you’ll let him kill me?”

”You know what awaits you, should you continue to resist the dark side.”

”Anakin...” Ahsoka tried desperately, “He’s _manipulating_ you!”

She’d given it a fair bit of thought, had meditated all throughout the night over the matter. It was the final conclusion she’d come to, as dawn arrived. Why else would Sidious have told her one thing about the rituals, and Anakin another?

” _Do not_ -!” He began, jabbing pointed finger in her face. She flinched away, tensing...

”Barriss told me something last night,” Ahsoka began after a moment, gradually un-tensing. “She said that while she was the one who orchestrated the Temple bombing, it hadn’t been her original intention.”

Vader stepped back, grabbed her by her arm and dragged her into the nearest lift. His grip was a vice, and her prosthetic leg was cumbersome, awkward. She stumbled as she tried to keep up with his stride.

”Just _listen_ for a second,” Ahsoka pleaded. Vader activated the lift, saying nothing to her as they traveled up. She continued, taking his silence to mean he was listening, “Sidious was influencing Barriss. She told me that she felt a pull one night, that she came here and met with him. She wanted to turn him over to the Jedi when she realized he was a Sith, but he threatened to kill us all. He _forced_ her to bomb the Temple, and then later when we got involved, he told her that he’d find a way to implicate me. All she had to do was... was put the evidence exactly where I’d be spotted with it.”

”And you believed her?” Vader asked.

”She was telling the truth!” Ahsoka insisted, “I _sensed_ it.”

”Perhaps your senses are not as finely attuned as you’d like to believe.”

”Why can’t you just _look past_ the lies you’ve been fed?” Ahsoka said, fraught, “Sidious told you I can bring back people who’ve died, but he didn’t tell _me_ that! What if he’s lying to you? Haven’t you even _considered_ that possibility?”

When Vader said nothing, Ahsoka finally relented. This entire endeavor, she realized, had been hopeless. From the very start. She’d tricked herself into believing Anakin was still in there.

And now she was going to die for it.

* * *

At the Sith shrine, Sidious awaited them.

”Your hand.” He said once she’d stepped atop the altar. She offered it to him wordlessly, never once looking away from Vader, not even when the blade sliced open her palm, not when her blood spilled or the blue flames burst between them. She let her eyes fix to where she knew his own lie hidden beneath that mask, let him be the last thing she would see. She was sure to sear every part of his visage into her brain. It was only right, she surmised, that her last reminder of the world she would soon depart be her failure.

 _Maybe Padmé and his mother will succeed where I could not_ , she thought, and then closed her eyes and let the ritual take her.

* * *

The world she entered was the one she’d entered before, the first time Sidious had started the ritual. She stood in waist deep waters, the light in the distance beckoning. Ahsoka understood instantly what it was she had to do. She started forward, wading through the dark and vast body...

” _Stop_!” Commanded a voice, that same voice who’d spoken to her the first time she’d entered this realm, “You must see through this deception. This ritual was never about your memories. The memories were only meant to distract you.”

”I _do_ see through the deception.” Ahsoka said, defeated, “But I’m not... I’m not enough on my own to save my Master.”

”And you think altering your fate will be _enough_?” The voice said, “Ahsoka Tano, it was the Chosen One’s _choice_ to fall. Nothing and no one could have prevented that, save for himself. But there is still a possibility that you could bring him back to the light.”

”Then what can I do?” Ahsoka asked helplessly. She felt tears gather in her eyes, spill down her face. They _plinked_ into the water below, upsetting its surface. Ahsoka hung her head, caught her reflection in the water. Her eyes widened incrementally, her tears dried...

Her reflection glowed a brilliant white.

”What can I do?” Ahsoka asked again. “If I come out of this without unlocking what Sidious desires, then I’m dead. If I leave here without Padmé and Anakin’s mother... I’m dead. In every situation, in every outcome I’ve considered, I always end up _dead_. How can I help Anakin in that way?”

”There is one scenario you haven’t considered.” The voice said. “You will see. You must leave this place, and I will show you.”

”How?” Ahsoka asked.

”Sink into the waters.” The voice answered, “Swim to the other side.”

Ahsoka did. She lowered down, down, _down_ into the water _,_ swam to the bottom that gave way to another surface. She emerged on that other side. There, she saw a figure waiting on the shore of a world with a white sun hanging low in an inky sky. A green fog permeated the air, flowing along a shore made of dark sands...

Ahsoka swam to them, stepped out of the water and discovered the figure to be a woman. She was dressed simply, had brown eyes and brown hair done up in braided bun. She smiled warmly as Ahsoka approached, offered her hand. Ahsoka took it without hesitance, and the woman led them away.

”Who are you? Where are we?” Ahsoka asked as they walked, “Were you the one speaking to me from before?”

”No.” The woman said, “That was Daughter. I am Mother. And we are in a limbo, of sorts. Not a place of death, but not of life, either.”

”You’re... the Mother?” Ahsoka asked.

The woman nodded and reaffirmed, “ _Mother_.”

”Are you... are you like the ones I met on Mortis?” Ahsoka questioned.

”No.” The Mother shook her head, explained, “But I know of them. From another life, one where I held much more sway over the universe. As you see me now, I am but a reincarnation, and I idle here, regenerating, waiting for my next life. I am neither light nor dark nor balance. I just _am_.”

”... I see.” Ahsoka responded, taking that in. “What... what am I doing here, then?”

”I must show you something.” The Mother responded, stopping them where the shore met the land. She raised her free hand, index and middle finger extended, “It will restore what has been lost.”

With that, she touched her fingers to Ahsoka’s forehead. Ahsoka felt her entire body go taut like a pulled string, watched the events of that forgotten time play in her mind, and _remembered_.

”The Son turned me, and I...” Ahsoka said, stumbling as the scenes, even the ones she _shouldn’t_ have remembered, flooded and dissipated before her eyes. The woman clutched her hand tighter, anchoring her. “Anakin... he brought me back to _life_.”

”He did.” The Mother agreed.

When Ahsoka could no longer speak, still processing everything she’d been shown, the Mother continued,

”You have a determination few others in your life do, Ahsoka Tano.”

”Why did you show me this?” Ahsoka eventually asked, “If this was never about unlocking my memories, then what _was_ it about?”

The Mother responded after a careful, considering moment, “The one you know as Sidious has manipulated both you and the Chosen One in order to achieve what he desires. As you exist now, imbued with the life energy of the Daughter, you have obtained what he has spent his entire life searching for: the secret to immortality. You hold that secret. You _are_ that secret. If you were to approach that light on the other side of the ocean, you would have given that secret away.”

”Immortality?” Ahsoka asked, voice barely above a whisper. Her heart plummeted into her stomach. She heard what had not been spoken and asked, dismayed, “I’m... I’m _immortal_?”

”In a way. In many ways, but not in others. You are capable of achieving death, but it will be long before you reach it, much longer than it would have been, previously.” The Mother confirmed. Apologetically she continued, “You will live a lengthy, often lonely life. It is not something I would wish on anyone who was born with an initially infinitesimal lifespan. You will see many you love come and go, and you will suffer many heartbreaks. Thus is the burden of the one who has been bestowed by the Daughter a second chance at life.”

”I...” Ahsoka said, breathing heavily as the truth of it crested down on her like a cold wave, “I don’t...”

”Come.” The Mother said, pulling gently on her hand, “There is something else you must see. It will help you, when you return to the realm of the living.”

Ahsoka followed wordlessly, her limbs suddenly liquid. They traversed a rocky terrain, came into a valley much less somber than the one they’d left, with tall, white grass and green stone. In the distance were great, obsidian mountains touching a sky that gave way to another ocean. Ahsoka tried not to look, too afraid she’d overwhelm herself further. Instead, she focused on the hand holding her own, let its grip ground her to what reality existed around her.

At the heart of the valley was a cylindrical stone carved with depictions of the Father, Son and Daughter. The Mother stopped them before it, splayed her free hand atop its surface. The rock shuddered, glowed. A rectangular shape formed at the top, slid slowly upward...

The Mother looked to Ahsoka, released her hand and said, “Take this with you, when you go.”

Ahsoka grabbed onto the handle of what she quickly realized was a sword, pulled it out of the stone. It’s blade materialized to life before her in a flurry of green smoke.

”This is what the Son used when he tried to kill the Father.” Ahsoka remembered as she studied it, “But he killed the Daughter instead.”

”It is the only weapon capable of eradicating the evil you face.” The Mother said, “It will aid you on your journey. But it is important you never allow it fall into the wrong hands. Once you have used it, and the evil has left your realm, it is imperative you destroy it. It will find its way back into this realm, once you do.”

”How will I destroy it?” Ahsoka asked.

”You will know.” The Mother answered cryptically.

Ahsoka sighed, willed the blade away with a thought and said, “I have so many questions.”

”You will find the answers to them.” The Mother responded, “But not here. I cannot hold Sidious and his machinations back forever, not in this form. You will need to return, and soon.”

”... You said you were waiting here for your next life, that you were a reincarnation.” Ahsoka asked, “Was this your previous form?”

”... You are smart and wise, Ahsoka Tano. You see the things others do not, ask the questions they perhaps would never think of.” The Mother smiled. Sighing she continued, “I suppose I can answer this one question. This form I’ve taken was my most recent past life. I was the caregiver of the one who has lost his way. I was the mother of the Chosen One.”

”You...” Ahsoka sucked in a breath, searching the Mother’s face that grew sad, “You were _Anakin’s_ mother?”

”I was.” The Mother nodded, “In that life, I went by the name of Shmi Skywalker. Though, I was unaware at that time that I was a reincarnation, as I did not attach myself to anyone existing in your realm, not how the Daughter did with you, and so my memories waited here for me to return. The Daughter, however, she remembers in your realm what she might not have, had she not given half of her life energy to you. She will be your guide when you return. She will be your eternal companion.”

”She’s _Morai_.” Ahsoka realized, her eyes widening. She asked Shmi desperately, “Can’t you come back with me? Can’t you help Anakin?”

Shmi shook her head regretfully, her brown eyes full of forlorn.

”As I exist now, no. I cannot leave this realm until I am ready, until my next life has been forged. But even if I could leave, I... I would not.”

”But _why_?” Ahsoka asked, “You we’re his mother! He... he _loved_ you. He’s desperate enough to sacrifice me just to save you!”

Shmi shook her head further and said, “The future has been determined. The only things that can be altered now are the things that have already come to pass.”

”That... doesn’t make a lot of sense.” Ahsoka said.

In the distance, thunder rumbled. Ahsoka looked to the sky, found the sun seeping from its previous white to a slow red.

”It will, soon.” Shmi promised. She placed her hands atop Ahsoka’s shoulders and added, serious, “Now, it is time for you to leave. Do not fear what awaits you. Do not give up hope. Stay on this path, and you _will_ succeed at what you believe you have failed. It has been foretold. It has been willed, already... you just cannot see it. This is your destiny. You don’t realize it yet, Ahsoka Tano, but you have the ability to cleave the stars.”

”... Alright.” Ahsoka said, the uncertainty not quite gone, but the belief of the one before her enough to rely on. She nodded her head, her grip on the handle of the blade tightening as she tried to force confidence into her words. “ _I will_.”

”I _know_ you will, Ahsoka Tano.” Shmi said, her smile radiant. She raised her hand to touch her forehead...

 _”Now, be brave...”_ Shmi began...

... but her words fell away as the world shifted beneath her feet. Ahsoka gasped, eyes opening. The fire around her died to nothing. From the shadows Sidious snarled, “ _You have locked the door!_ ”

Blue lighting shot towards her, too quick for her to react. Ahsoka curled in on herself as the energy impacted upon her. It was enough to make her cry out. She dropped to her side, convulsing...

The lightning ceased after several long, agonizing seconds. Ahsoka looked up weakly, found Vader where she’d left him, his hand extending to her in an aborted gesture. He took a step forward...

” _You will pay for this!_ ” Sidious bellowed. He flicked his wrist, a saber sliding into his palm from the sleeve of his dark robes. He activated it, flew at her. He brought the blade up and back, swung it down...

Ahsoka activated the blade Shmi had bestowed her, held it above her head defensively...

... hands grabbed at her from behind, _pulled_...

... and Ahsoka landed on her back, sword brandished, to find three different pairs of widened eyes peering down at her. It was as they blinked at her in various stages of alarm and relief that Ahsoka heard the words Shmi hadn’t gotten to say before she was plunged back into her own realm. They echoed in her mind, now, giving her the strength to rise in the obsidian realm she now found herself and face the three she did not recognize. Those words were,

_”... and don’t look back. Don’t look back.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my favorite lines in Star Wars is Shmi’s “Now, be brave, and don’t look back. Don’t look back.” I cry practically every time I think about it or hear it and yep I’m crying rn, too :_(
> 
> here is the link below if you want to cry with me
> 
> [be brave scene](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BsxcNhg4D3Y)


	16. Rescue pt. IV

It was more difficult to find Cody than Rex could have predicted.

Sneaking into what had once been known as GAR Headquarters was one thing, but finding one specific man among a retinue of troopers with no distinguishing embellishments on their armor was... another thing entirely.

Days passed, days of waiting and waning patience and moments of almost, _almost_ giving up. But then...

“Trooper!” Came the crisp voice of a brother. Rex tensed. He’d been caught red-handed. “What are you doing in here at this hour?”

 _Here_ was the databank terminal, the _hour_ was too late to be awake, and what he was doing was-

“Are you slicing through security footage?” The intruder asked, incredulous. He aimed his blaster at Rex’s back and said, “You’ve got a lot of explaining to do.”

Rex didn’t waste precious time trying to talk his way out of it, or even explain the truth of his actions - that he’d been trying to find one specific person through days worth of security footage. He’d tried in the past to make up a believable excuse and failed. So now, he kicked himself back from the holo he’d been working at. His chair rolled, hit the trooper in his legs. He grunted, caught off guard, and Rex used the momentum of his own propelling to twist around, grab the trooper’s blaster and throw him down. On the floor, they grappled, rolling around and top of one another to get the upper hand. Rex punched the trooper, an uppercut that sent his helmet sailing off his head. His face revealed, Rex finally saw...

... the long, almost artful scar that wound it’s way down the left side of Cody’s head.

”Cody?” Rex asked, eyes widening behind his own helmet. Cody stopped fighting him long enough to ask, “How do you know that name? Imperial regulation demands our identities under the Republic can no longer be used!”

”... _Roger, roger._ ” Rex said. Cody’s eyes briefly widened in recognition before Rex punched him once more, hard, in the face. Cody’s eyes rolled into the back of his head, his body went limp...

Rex slumped, rolled over onto his back and sighed deeply as he stared at the ceiling. He eventually turned back to face Cody’s unconscious form and asked himself,

”Now what?”

A bird cooed above him. Rex shot up, looked over his shoulder to find Morai perched on the back of the chair he’d been sitting on, waiting by the door.

”You’re back.” He said in relieved greeting. “Am I any closer to finding Ahsoka?”

Morai cooed again. He took that to mean _yes_.

”Okay.” Rex got to his feet, inspecting Cody and said, “First, I need your help getting the chip out of Cody’s head. Think you can distract security long enough for me to accomplish that?”

Morai hopped once in place, gesticulating with her wings to the door.

”Thanks, Morai.” Rex smiled, fitting the helmet back over Cody’s head before lifting his body up and over his shoulder. He grabbed his blaster where he’d left it by the desk, made his way swiftly out of the databank terminal and down the hall. Morai split off as they ventured, perhaps to apprehend or steer another away. Rex trusted she wouldn’t let him down and continued on foot to the infirmary. Once there, he removed Cody’s helmet, loaded him into a capsule and programmed the surgery that would extract the chip into the terminal stationed at the side. He turned and guarded the door with his blaster as the surgery commenced. Only a minute or more passed before Cody emerged, the side of his shaved, a bandage covering the skin that would soon scar...

”Rex?” He asked groggily, sitting up. Rex turned to face him and asked,

”How do you feel?”

”... Like I haven’t been myself for a long, long time.”

”I’ll explain.” Rex promised, “I’ll tell you why, but first we have to get out of here.”

Cody only nodded, eyes haunted. Rex handed him his helmet and said, “Follow me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cooooDDDDDY! :D


	17. Realization

The three before Ahsoka stared at her unabashedly, mouths hanging opened as they looked her up and down. Ahsoka felt no hostility, only wonder and amazement. She noted, aside from the feelings they emitted, that all of them had a lightsaber clipped to their belt. She asked them,

”Who are you? How am I here?”

”We pulled you through the portal.” One of them said - a boy with a set of scars bisecting his upper left cheek. He gestured at the rings of white that sat behind him and added, “Morai led us here, though... she took off once the portal opened. We _saved_ you.”

Ahsoka shot him an uncomprehending look.

”... She hasn’t met us yet.” Another said. She was a girl with a narrow face, striking features and observant dark eyes. She pursed her lips in contemplation and continued to the two boys beside her, “Which means we need to be careful about what we say. Revealing too much could unravel the space-time continuum as we know it.”

”Excuse me...” Ahsoka asked, “ _What_?”

”We can’t tell you much.” The other boy - his eyes a bright blue, his hair a light blond - said sheepishly. “It’s... on your orders, actually.”

” _My_ orders?” She questioned.

”The you from what you would consider the future. Our time, specifically.” The boy with the scars explained, shrugging, “You’re... pretty cryptic there.” 

”... I guess I have to take your word for it.” Ahsoka said, deciding she’d come back to what he’d revealed when she had a clearer head. For now she wanted to know, “What is this place?”

“A world between worlds.” He answered easily. The other two shot him a look so intense and fierce it made him wince and defend, timid, “What? She’s the one who told us about this place, so obviously she knows!”

”Well, _now_ she does.” The girl deadpanned.

”Perhaps...” The other boy began, “We were meant to tell her?”

Ahsoka almost couldn’t fathom what the three of them were saying, but the reminder that she’d just traveled to and from a ritual-induced mind-scape meant that she was no longer as thrown by the strange and unnatural. She regarded the three of them as they bickered with a certain calmness that surprised even her.

”... You’re taking this better than I thought you would.” The girl said eventually.

”You aren’t surprised, are you?” The blond-haired boy asked of the girl. “There’s very little that surprises Ahsoka.”

”Good point.” The girl nodded. She took a step forward, met Ahsoka’s gaze and said, rather diplomatically, “Ahsoka Tano, we _are_ from the future. We came here through a portal opened by a mural depicting _The Ones_. The you in our time sent us here on this mission well over a galactic year ago, before embarking on a mission of your own. You gave us very specific instructions that we _must_ adhere to. Now, I must ask, what do you hear?”

Ahsoka processed her words, stretched her awareness. She hadn’t heard anything so far, just the natural frequency that fell into the background of any planet. But this... wasn’t a planet, she was quickly coming to terms with. When she looked up, down or sideways, everything - walkways, paths and portals - seemed to stretch infinitely outward, twisting and winding and dipping.

”What am I supposed to be listening for?” Ahsoka asked her.

”Voices.” The girl responded, “Specifically, the voice of Jedi Master Mace Windu.”

”... Right.” Ahsoka said. Belatedly, she realized she still had the sword brandished. She willed it away, hooked the hilt to where her lightsaber would have hung and then lowered herself into a lotus. Around her, the other three did as well. She asked them, before they began to meditate, “Why do you need _me_ to listen, just out of curiosity?”

”None of us hear the same voices.” The blond-haired boy explained, “We... established that when we arrived, a bit before we pulled you through. And you told us specifically to find you, in the moment we just found you, that you would be the only one who’d be able to find him.”

Ahsoka only nodded, closed her eyes and opened her mind to the Force. So many voices came to her, whispers and shouts and screams and laughs. Ahsoka flinched at first, taken aback, but worked to turn over every last one that was presented to her. Some were familiar, some not. Some said to her things she’d heard before, whilst others spoke words she suspected she never would. Secrets were shared, confessed; decelerations were made and vows were broken. Among everything, the voices that stood out the most said, fading in and out of her awareness,

_”Old sins, cast long shadows, they do...”_

_”Every decision you have ever made-”_

_“... breaking my heart! You’re going down a path I can’t...”_

_”- has led you to this moment.”_

_“... my brother, Anakin! I loved...”_

_”The future, by its nature, can be changed!”_

_”... never would have made it as Obi-Wan’s Padawan-”_

_”... Master Tano! I found the...”_

_”-but you might make it as mine.”_

_”There are two kinds of family... kind like me and Kaeden... the other kind of family is the kind you find.”_

_”No one has her kind of-”_

_”... haven’t lost faith in you, Ahsoka.”_

_”-determination.”_

_”What is this place?”_

_”Fear leads to anger-”_

_”A conduit through which the entire Force of the universe flows.”_

_”-anger leads to hate-”_

_”Are you happy, child?”_

_”-hate... leads to_ suffering _.”_

_”Where is Padmé? Is she safe? Is she alright?”_

_”It seems, in your anger, you killed her.”_

_“Don’t listen to him, Anakin!”_

Ahsoka’s eyes snapped open.

The three around her leaned forward in anticipation, waiting.

”I heard him.” Ahsoka said, voice graver than she’d intended it to be. She felt, in no uncertain terms, that the order in which she’d heard the voices had been intentional. There was a message to decipher, to understand and deliver.

She knew what it was. And she knew who it was for.

”Lead the way.” The girl said. Ahsoka got to her feet, took off running. The three behind her were quick to follow. When the path they were on split, Ahsoka looked right, left...

... and spotted Morai perched atop the portal.

”This way!” Ahsoka beckoned the others, turning left. She brought them to the portal, which materialized before them the image of Master Windu deflecting Sidious’ lightning off his lightsaber. Behind them was...

” _Anakin_.”

”Master Tan- I mean, Ahsoka.” The girl began, urgently, “You must focus! When Master Windu falls, we _must_ catch him!”

”... Okay.” Ahsoka said faintly, unable to peel her eyes from her former Master. He was as she remembered him. He looked from Sidious, who begged for mercy, claiming himself to be too weak, and Master Windu, the emotions on his face thrown into sharp contrast against the light of the lightning. He looked...

Morai chittered, insistently flapping her wings...

”Get ready!” The blond-haired boy said, “We’ll reach through and use the Force!”

On the other side, Anakin demanded, “He must stand trial!”

Master Windu tried to reason, “He’s too dangerous to be left alive!”

”I need him!”

Master Windu swung back...

”No!”

And Anakin, lightsaber igniting, swung up-

Master Windu _screamed_. Sidious shot him with lightning.

” _Unlimited power!_ ”

... and the force of it knocked Windu off his feet, knocked him out of the shattered window in the Chancellor’s office and into the depths of Coruscant below.

”Now!” Someone yelled, maybe her, and together they reached through.

” _Pull!_ ” The boy with the scars grunted.

They used the Force to catch Master Windu’s unconscious body, to maneuver him out of the air and in through the portal. Once he was safely through, they set him down gently on his side. Ahsoka lowered herself down beside him, rolled him onto his back, checked his pulse...

She heaved a great sigh of relief. He was still alive.

”Master Windu.” She said, shaking him until his eyes peeled gradually open, “Master Windu, can you hear me?”

”... Tano.” He blinked at her, confused, “Where... are we?”

”... The world between worlds, apparently.” Ahsoka responded. If Master Windu didn’t believe her, his face didn’t show it. Instead, he looked casually around, absorbing everything around him.

”What are we doing here?” He eventually asked.

”Rescuing you.” The boy with the scars replied.

Finally, his brow knit. Seeming to realize there were others present, Windu tried to sit up, grunted. He drew his severed arm to his chest, concealing it beneath the singed edge of his sleeve. Ahsoka helped him get to his feet.

”If that is what you claim...” Windu began after a moment, finding his balance, “Then I am deeply grateful.”

But quietly he added, his head falling in regret, “I’ve failed.”

“You did.” The girl agreed, purely factual, “But you’ve been given a second chance. When you return to your time, you’ll need to lay low. A lot will have changed and...”

A bit of sadness seeped into her expression, a bit of sympathy in her voice as she finished, “... you’ll need to go to Dathomir.”

”Dathomir?” He asked, eyebrows rising.

”You’ll want to finish what you started.” The boy with the scars said, “But you can’t. You have to wait, and you have to find Maul.”

”Maul?” Windu asked, eyeing Ahsoka. “Tano, what are they saying?”

”I’m... as lost as you.” Ahsoka confessed, “But they haven’t steered me wrong, yet.”

”It was my understanding that you apprehended and captured Maul.” Windu accused, “Is this to imply you did not?”

”I _did_ capture Maul.” Ahsoka said, “But... something happened. I don’t want to overwhelm you with the details. Where I’m from... I _believe_ where I’m from is a year from where we just pulled _you_ from. When I was on my way back to Coruscant, I heard everything that just happened to you. I knew something had changed. I had to let Maul free. Letting him loose was... it’s one of the only reasons why I’m alive, right now.”

For a painfully long moment, Mace Windu said nothing. Ahsoka met his unreadable gaze unflinchingly. Though she’d often found herself on the receiving end of his derision and scorn, she needed him now more than ever to simply accept her words, to understand. To her immense shock, his gaze broke from her own, traveled down...

”Your leg.” He said, actual shock registering in his features.

”... My leg isn’t relevant right now.”

”Master Windu.” The blond-haired boy said after a tense silence, “Do you understand what we’ve asked of you?”

”I’d be more inclined to understand if I knew who was giving me orders, and _why_.” Windu retorted. Ahsoka sighed. Even after experiencing near death, he was still as stubborn and uncompromising as ever.

Both the blond-haired boy and the boy with the scars looked to the girl, clearly waiting for her verdict. She stood with her arms crossed, contemplating...

”I can’t gauge the damage it might do,” She eventually spoke, “But I can tell we won’t be getting anywhere unless we oblige.”

With that, she approached Windu, uncrossed her arms and folded them behind her back and said, once more in that diplomatically crisp, almost core-world accent,

”Jedi Master Mace Windu, my name is Leia Organa. I’m from what you would consider the future. I’m here on a special mission assigned to me by Ahsoka Tano, if you can believe it. My companions are Ezra Bridger and Luke-”

She stopped, faltered as she gestured from the boy with the scars to the boy with the blond head of hair. She looked at him with a question in her gaze, as if she wasn’t certain how - or if - she should proceed. Realizing she was waiting for him to help her move forward, the boy - Luke - stepped up. When he spoke, it was to say,

”I am Luke Skywalker, the twin brother to Leia Organa and... the biological son of Anakin Skywalker and Padmé Amidala.”

Ahsoka looked between the two of them, the _siblings_. She didn’t know what her face must’ve shown - astonishment or dismay or anguish - but Luke and Leia smiled at her sheepishly, disarming all doubt in her mind.

”I knew Padmé was pregnant, but...” Ahsoka began, gulped, “After everything happened, she... but you two are...”

”We know.” The twins said in unison, their eyes shining with unshed tears. Ahsoka felt her heart stutter, suspend...

” _How?_ ” Ahsoka asked, looking between them.

”You’ll find the answer to that, eventually. But not from us.” Leia said regretfully, “We all need to head back to our respective times, and soon.”

”This is... a lot to take in.” Master Windu said. Ahsoka couldn’t bring herself to even look at him, however; she couldn’t pull her gaze away from the ones she’d had no idea, until that moment, even existed.

”You said your name was Organa.” She asked Leia, “Does this mean-?”

”We really can’t tell you anything more.” Luke said apologetically. “What we _can_ tell you, however, is that when you get back to your time, don’t look for an upwards escape.”

Ahsoka blinked at him blankly, tried to decipher his meaning when...

” _Luke_.” The one known as Ezra chastised, “Now isn’t the time to be cryptic! That’s Ahsoka’s job.”

”I’m not being cryptic!” He defended, “This is what Ahsoka told me to say!”

”C’mon.” Ezra called to them, “We need to get going. Morai is getting antsy.”

Sure enough, when Ahsoka looked over her shoulder at the reincarnation of the Daughter, she was flying in hurried circles above them, twittering to get their attention.

”How do we get back?” Master Windu asked them.

”Through the portal we just pulled you through.” Ezra explained. “I know it doesn’t look like you could pass through it, but once you step through you’ll be exactly where we took you from... _hopefully_.”

”I see.” Master Windu said. He looked at the portal and said, “Anything else I should know?”

”Find your lightsaber.” Ezra said, “And remember to-”

”Go to Dathomir and find Maul.” Mace Windu nodded, expression hardening, “Got it.”

”And _don’t_ kill him.” Ezra added, serious, “If you kill him, you’re gonna mess everything up.”

”.. And if he tries to kill me?” Windu asked.

”He will try, _probably_.” Ezra shrugged, “You just have to stop him long enough to explain why you’re there.”

”And why will I be there, exactly?”

”Because you need his help.”

Master Windu sighed deeply, muttering something beneath his breath before stepping through. The portal rippled around him, swallowing him, and then he was gone.

”It’s time.” Leia said to Ahsoka, “We need to go.”

”Wait.” Luke began, looking at Ahsoka, “I... I need to...”

And then his arms were around her, hugging her tightly. Before she knew it, the boy Ezra had his arms around her, too.

”We don’t have time for this.” Leia began, standing to the side, but Ahsoka noted the way her eyes were wet, that she was just waiting for an excuse to hug her, too. That excuse came in the form of Ezra asking, accusatory,

”You’re really gonna pass up an opportunity to hug your own Jedi Master? _Seriously_? We haven’t seen her in over a year!”

And then Leia was on them, almost knocking them all to their feet with the force of her embrace. Ahsoka laughed, despite herself, tears welling in her eyes. The amount of love and affection she felt coming from them, it...

It was enough to make her feel almost whole again.

”I’m your Master, in the future?” Ahsoka asked of Leia, wrapping her own arms around the three of them. She hoped she could convey at least half of the emotion they conveyed to her, even though she didn’t yet fully know any of them.

Leia only nodded, her tears finally spilling. She smiled through them and said, “I can’t even worry about what telling you might do, because... if anything changes, I don’t want that fact to.”

Ahsoka’s expression softened. Eventually, all three of them released her.

”Okay.” Leia said, sniffing hard before wiping at her face. “Now we _really_ have to go.”

”Morai will lead you out of here.” Luke said to Ahsoka, “Just follow her.”

Ahsoka nodded. She turned her gaze to the space above them, let Morai guide her away, but something gave her pause, made her turn back and ask them,

”Is there... is there anyway we could save-?”

”We know what you’re going to ask.” Leia interrupted apologetically, “We know. Believe me when I say that no one wants that more than us.”

She shared a meaningful look with Luke, who continued, sadly,

”Time is... _tricky_. Our mother... she’s not in the future. Trying to alter what we know to be true, versus what we _want_ to be true... it would only create branches, ones that could complicate our reality.”

”We don’t fully understand the repercussions of what being here could do, yet.” Ezra added, sympathetically, “We’ve all been tempted. We’ve all wanted to reach back for people we’ve lost. It’s been one of the hardest lessons we’ve ever had to learn. But you taught us that no one is ever really gone, that everyone becomes part of the cosmic Force, when they pass on, that they never really leave us.”

”We can’t... we can’t save Padmé, Ahsoka.” Leia continued after a moment, her expression so defeated it made Ahsoka’s heart clench. “There’s a reason... _believe_ me when I say there’s more than one reason.”

”I... I think I understand what you’re saying.” Ahsoka said quietly, remembering the voices from before. She looked to Morai, who still circled above them and continued, “I’m so sorry.”

”... Let’s go.” Ezra said a moment after, taking Leia’s hand in one palm and Luke’s in the other. “Goodbye, Ahsoka. Come find us in the future.”

”I will.” She vowed, bowing deeply as she bid them farewell. They bowed in return, each of them smiling at her before they turned to move in their respective path. Ahsoka followed Morai, listening as their voices carried,

”... think Sabine and Han are doing okay?”

”... surprised if they haven’t fatally wounded one another, by now.”

”It probably wasn’t the wisest idea, asking them to guard the mural...”

”... think they’ve figured out how to close it back up?”

”Sabine and Han are smart, I know they’ll find a way.”

But then they were too far to hear anymore. Ahsoka resisted the urge to turn back, to look one last time at the twins, to memorize the details of their faces. She knew where she’d find at least one of them, and she knew one Bail Organa had _a lot_ of explaining to do.

Morai came to rest atop the portal Ahsoka had been pulled through. She pecked at the white ring she rested upon, looked expectantly down...

”This is it?” Ahsoka asked, heartbeat picking up. She brandished the sword again, letting it flourish to life in her hand. She rolled her shoulders, readjusted her grip and said, determined, “Okay. Let’s go.”

Together, they went through the portal...

... Ahsoka gasped, expecting her feet to land on the altar, only to find herself emerge among ruins. She looked out, down. The shrine had been destroyed, the ceiling had caved in. She stood atop rubble, thick slabs of broken stone. The once pulsing, writhing red vines from before were nowhere to be seen. The entrance to the shrine itself was gone, filled in by the rubble. Ahsoka looked around, waiting for an attack that never came.

”How long was I gone for?” Ahsoka asked Morai, who flew herself several feet away, began to peck earnestly at the rubble she landed upon. “How much time has passed?”

Morai squawked, almost seemed to be gesturing her over. Reluctantly sheathing the blade and pinning it to her belt, Ahsoka made her way to her companion as quickly as she could.

”What is it?” Ahsoka asked. Morai jumped in place atop the rubble in which she perched, urgent.

Ahsoka looked at the rubble, realization dawning in her eyes. She asked,

”Is something buried under here?”

Morai chirped. Ahsoka studied the rock, devising ways she could clear it without causing a further cave-in when...

A familiar sound reached her ears, it’s respiration parceled and strained, but definitely there. Ahsoka’s heart leapt into her throat. She moved back, alarmed, used her echolocation to search...

And there it was, beneath all that debris: a body, a heartbeat, a breath that echoed...

”Anakin!” Ahsoka yelled, using the Force to lift the rubble up. Morai flew up and out of sight. Ahsoka removed the debris layer by layer until his breathing grew clearer, until it didn’t labor so horribly through that helmet. Eventually she found him, still half buried. He was on his side, his lightsaber resting in his slack hand. His helmet was partially cracked. Ahsoka caught a glimpse of what lie beneath, disturbed to discover his pallor ashen, his skin around his eye... scarred and braised, as if he’d been _burnt_.

Using the Force once again, Ahsoka pulled the last big piece of debris from his body. What little remained she used her hands to clear from his person. Dragging him free, she propped him up as best she could against a slab of relatively unbroken roof, looked around for Morai...

... found her at the far other side of the wreckage, waiting patiently where the debris dipped to what remained of the wall, her wings fluttering, beckoning.

Ahsoka understood she was showing her a way out. She turned back to Vader, went to lift him only to discover...

His one visible eye had opened, and it glowed a hideous yellow.

Ahsoka stilled, uncertain. He regarded her, blinked...

... and the eye went back to its natural blue.

”... What happened here?” She asked hesitantly.

”You’re alive...” He breathed, the effort it took clipping the respiration strangely through the broken helmet. His voice was a mix between the rumble it had been behind the mask and the natural inflection she’d familiarized herself with during the war. His eye widened as he further took her in. “I’d thought... I’d thought he’d killed you. You disappeared right before my eyes.”

He leaned forward, reaching out to her as if to touch her, as if to confirm she were real, but then what little she could see of his face twisted in pain. He hunched over, clutched his mid-section, grunting...

Ahsoka went to reach for him, stopped herself short and asked as his breathing labored, “Who am I talking to right now? Anakin, or Vader?”

”... Sidious betrayed me.” He began after a moment, sighing as he slumped back, whatever pain he’d felt gradually easing. “You... were right. About everything. I see that now. He tried to kill me when I confronted him. He brought the shrine down.”

Ahsoka stared at him, that one visible sliver of him through the helmet. Hesitantly, she reached the rest of the way out, grabbed him by his shoulders. She thought she could feel it, under all that thick armor, just how unwell he was, both physically _and_ mentally.

”You need this suit to survive, don’t you?” She asked.

”... It is difficult to breathe, without it.” He responded.

”Okay.” Ahsoka nodded, taking that in. She said again, more certain, “Okay. I’m going to help you to stand, alright?”

He said nothing, but didn’t resist when she went to his side, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. She noticed his lightsaber fell to the wayside as she helped him to stand, prayed he didn’t notice as they started forward.

Luckily, he didn’t.

Despite its lack of maneuverability, her prosthetic was strong, bore the weight of them both as they made their way to Morai. Ahsoka noticed Anakin’s eye registered familiarity when it lighted upon her.

”You’ve seen her before?” Ahsoka asked.

”... Yes.” He confirmed, but didn’t elaborate further. Ahsoka didn’t mind, too focused on keeping him upright.

It was as they drew those final few feet to Morai’s position that Ahsoka realized what she’d happened upon. A parting in the debris, a tunnel that led down...

And Luke’s words came back to her, telling her, _“... don’t look for an upwards escape.”_

”Okay, it’s going to be a tight squeeze.” Ahsoka said, inspecting the tunnel, “But I think you can fit.”

When he made no move to lower himself down, Ahsoka huffed and added, reading his thoughts as clearly as if he’d said them aloud, “It might be undignified, but it’s our _only_ way out of here.”

He pulled away from her after a reluctant moment, started down and forward. His cape fell to the side, got caught beneath his knees, hindering his movements.

”I’m pulling it off.” Was the only warning Ahsoka gave him before she _yanked_ , ripping the fabric right out of his armor. Anakin made a sound akin to a surprised shout, shot her a glare over his shoulder before he continued, disgruntled, down through the tunnel. Ahsoka flung the cape backward, using the Force to blast it far away and out of sight. When he was several feet ahead of her, Ahsoka lowered down to follow. She looked up once to see if Morai was coming...

... only to discover she was no longer there.

“... So, that’s how it’s gonna be.” Ahsoka sighed, making her way through the tunnel. Beneath her breath she muttered, “No wonder the kids think I’m cryptic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there’s a lot to unpack here, right? I wanted to begin with saying that obviously the way events unfold in this AU is different from how they do in canon. I’ve implied a lot and would like to leave a lot to your imagination, but I feel it’s only right I explain some things. Without further ado...
> 
> Luke, Leia and Ezra clearly know one another. More than that, they’re very close friends :) 
> 
> Ezra and Sabine were still the ones to figure out the mural (the way in which they approached the mural in canon, however - surrounded by Imperials who’ve excavated the Temple on Lothal - is not the same)
> 
> Sabine and Han have a “you’re insufferable but you’re my friend, too” kind of relationship (≧▽≦) 
> 
> Ezra still contracts his scar, but it’s (probably) not in the same way he did in canon
> 
> Leia tells Ahsoka that she is her Master in the future, and that, where they are in their timeline, Ahsoka has been gone for more than a year on a mission of her own. This is why the kids get so emotional and hug Ahsoka - they’ve missed her :(
> 
> also, to all my Kanan stans, even though I never brought him up in this chapter I can confirm that Kanan isn’t dead in this AU because I REFUSE. the ones Ezra was telling Ahsoka he was tempted to save were his parents :_(
> 
> and last but not least, (and this will be addressed and discussed later in detail) Vader turned on Sidious, after he thought he’d killed Ahsoka. he isn’t quite where we wish him to be yet, though, headspace wise. even though his eye was visibly blue, he’s still got a lot of anger and hate in him, and that’s going to be hard for him to let go of.


	18. Runaways

They crawled for what felt like hours. Anakin stopped several times, having to catch his breath. Ahsoka wished she could heal, could find and fix whatever hindered his lungs; but she didn’t know the extent of the problem, and she wasn’t confident yet in her abilities to do so. She wondered how much life force it would take to even undo the obvious surface damage.

”Dead-end.” Anakin’s voice came to her eventually, winded. He stopped completely. Ahsoka looked around him, discovered that the tunnel had widened, offering room enough to maneuver. She crawled up beside Anakin, pressed a hand to the wall before them and said, “There’s running water on the other side of this. I think it might be a sewer.”

Anakin reached down, procured her saber. He held it out to her and said, rather sheepishly, “It appears mine has been lost. Cut our way through.”

Ahsoka said nothing to that, hoping he wouldn’t be willing to turn and go all the way back just for it. Thankfully, he only slumped back after she took the saber. She knew if this had been a year or more ago, she probably would have jokingly chastised him for _“forgetting his life,”_ and all around being a hypocrite for losing said _life_ when he himself distilled in her day in and day out how important it was to never do so. But the situation now was too dire, and the time for cracking jokes had long passed. The knowledge that they’d probably never go back to a previous state splintered Ahsoka’s heart.  
  
Ahsoka shook her head to clear the thoughts away, began cutting through. The smell on the other side hit her before she’d even made an entire opening. When she’d come full circle, she kicked the wall out and counted the seconds it took to drop: one... two... three... _splash_.

”It’s a long ways down.” Ahsoka said, peering below. She turned to him to ask, “Do you need help?”

He shouldered past her, jumped from the tunnel and into the sewer below. Ahsoka rolled her eyes, jumped and landed beside him a second later. She looked both ways, eyes adjusting to what little light infiltrated the smelly pipes, and caught Anakin with his arm extended, his gaze expectant.

”I’m not _giving_ this to you.” Ahsoka said, holding the saber back, “I thought we were past this.”

”If we are attacked, I am our best line of defense.”

”You’re clutching your midsection. You _broke_ something, Anakin.”

” _Give_ me the _lightsaber_.”

” _No_. You’re _injured_.”

”I give you _one last_ warn-”

” _Can it._ ” Ahsoka cut him off, turning to the right. That’s where she felt the tunnel taper into a wide, cavernous space, which meant a clearing, no doubt, and a way to the surface. She used the wall to feel her way there. “If you want this lightsaber back, you have to earn it.”

For several long seconds he said nothing. Ahsoka almost turned back, thinking his petulance kept him in place, but then she heard the rise and fall of his footsteps splashing quickly towards her. She breathed a sigh of relief, opened her mouth to speak when she felt his hand dart out, grab the sword fastened to her belt and pull it loose with the Force. She whirled around, found him holding the hilt in the hand not holding his mid-section.

Her breath caught in her throat.

”Give that back.” She demanded, voice a wobbling whisper. He studied it, turning its handle over and asked, lowly, ”Where did you get this?”

”I... I can explain-”

”Where did you go, when you disappeared?” He interrupted her, his one visible eye hardening.

”Master...” She began as calmly as she could, reaching out for it desperately, “Please. _Please_ , I need that back.”

He regarded her cooly, skeptically, suspiciously. She knew she looked horrified to him. She’d felt her entire body run cold, when she’d realized what he’d taken. It was clear to her, the way he looked between her and the blade... he remembered it, where it was from and what it’d been used for.

”A trade.” He said eventually, “The lightsaber for this sword... _and_ an explanation later for _why_ it’s here.”

Ahsoka nodded instantly, handing him the lightsaber. He held out the sword. They released their respective weapons in tandem, let them fall into the other’s hand. Ahsoka took several steps back once the sword was in her grasp again. Vader clipped her old saber to his belt wordlessly, started forward as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened at all. Ahsoka took a deep breath, pressed her hand to her chest. She hadn’t realized her heart had been pounding until he was well ahead of her.

”There is a ladder.” He called to her eventually, “And the entrance to the inspection chamber at its top.”

Ahsoka made her way through the pipe, found him already climbing.

* * *

They emerged in the Underworld near a wharf. The closest business establishment was closed, but few people lingered on the docks. Ahsoka hoped that no one would spot them as they made their way out. Unfortunately, one did, but he sat slumped in the doorway to an apartment building, blinking languidly. Ahsoka didn’t even have to smell his breath to know he was drunk, knew that he probably wouldn’t remember seeing them; and that if he did, he’d probably think it was some alcohol-induced dream.

”We need to get off-world.” Ahsoka said, supporting him as they walked through back-alleys, avoiding the main streets. “We can’t afford people’s gazes. It’s too risky. Someone is bound to raise an alarm.”

”I am _not_ leaving here until I _kill_ him.” Anakin spat venomously. 

”You aren’t in any condition to be _killing_ anyone.” Ahsoka retorted with a huff.

”He _betrayed_ -”

”I don’t want him around any more than you do, Master.” Ahsoka cut him off, “But think for a second: you’re injured and he’s got an army. If we’re to do anything, it’s going to take considerable planning and effort. If you try to fight him now, you’ll fail. You’ll _die_. And I didn’t stick around all this time to watch that happen.”

Anakin said nothing to that, seeming to mull it over. She felt his eyes on her. She kept her gaze forward, determinedly ignoring him as they traversed. Silence stretched between them, never reaching a stalemate. Finally, Ahsoka said,

”It’s not a decision. We _aren’t_ staying here. He’s probably already issued a warrant for your death, if he thinks there’s even a chance that you survived.”

”... Fine.” Anakin grumbled, “We’ll do it your way.”

Ahsoka breathed a relieved sigh. When Anakin stumbled, Ahsoka hoisted his arm around her shoulders again and walked them in the direction she knew she’d find the lifts. There, she discovered they were on level 2431. Inside the lift, Anakin slumped against the wall, breath coming in and out much faster than it had previously. Ahsoka glanced at him with worry as she keyed in her desired level.

”Where... are you... taking us?” He wheezed, still clutching his mid-section.

”Level 1313.” Ahsoka said, “I _hopefully_ still have some friends up there who can help us.”

Anakin didn’t respond to that, but she sensed his curiosity. They’d never talked about her life after she’d left the Order, the friends she’d made, the enemies she’d engaged. She could tell, when they’d reunited, that he’d wanted to know. But there hadn’t been time then to talk about it without calling his worry to the surface of every discussion.

There was time now.

”Their names are Trace and Rafa.” Ahsoka said quietly, “They... weren’t the biggest fans of the Jedi. I don’t know how they’ll react to seeing me again, ever since...”

She trailed off, not knowing how to say it. _Ever si_ _nce Palpatine declared the Jedi an enemy of the Empire_. Hopefully, she thought, they haven’t lost faith in me. Hopefully they didn’t take one look at her and turn her away. Or worse, turn her over to the authorities.

“When we reach them,” Ahsoka said, serious, “Let _me_ do the talking.”

Anakin closed his eyes. She thought he was ignoring her, but then his head started to loll.

”Master...?” Ahsoka reached for him, sensing what was about to happen. He fell unconscious, fell forward. She caught him, grunting against his deadweight.

”Anakin!” She yelled, lowering him onto his back. He was still breathing, but it was as strained as it had been when she’d discovered him under the rubble. Ahsoka checked the lift, saw they were just now cresting level 2130. She urged his unconscious form, “Don’t go to sleep. Stay awake just a little bit longer.”

His eye opened slowly, found her. Laboriously he said, “I... am unable to breathe.”

”We’re almost there.” She assured him. She checked the level again. 1946... 1788... 1521... 1313.

” _Okay_.” Ahsoka told him, “We’re on the level. We just have to walk a few blocks. Please, _please_ stay with me. I can’t carry you there. You _have_ to walk.”

He said nothing, just offered the hand not holding his torso. Ahsoka grunted as she pulled him to his feet. She wrapped his free arm around her shoulders once again, her teeth clenching as she hurried them out of the lift and onto the street. Passerby watched them openly, confusion, concern and thinly concealed fear evident in their faces. Ahsoka ignored them, too focused on putting one foot in front of the other. She stumbled as they approached the inner-city. Her leg was losing its mobility, gave out once under their combined weight...

Anakin slumped against her. She turned her head to find his eye closing. He was passing out again.

“ _Stay awake_.” She demanded.

He tried. He made a valiant effort, but Ahsoka felt it coming when his body finally gave. He fell face forward into the ground. She grabbed him beneath his arms and pulled him with everything she had, turning her head over her shoulder every few minutes to see how close she was to Trace and Rafa’s mech-bay. She hoped they still lived there, that they would help her.

”Trace! Rafa!” She yelled when she had the back entrance to the mech-bay in her line of sight. Her voice broke as she called again for their names. She was but feet away from the entrance when both of them emerged in what looked like night clothes. They looked out, eyes sweeping...

”Ahsoka?” Trace called when she spotted her. Ahsoka nearly wept from the sheer relief that seeing them spurred. The Martez sisters ran to her side, looking between her and Anakin with widening eyes and parting mouths...

”Aw, geez!” Rafa exclaimed, covering her nose, “You smell horrible! Have you been crawling around in the gutter?”

”What happened?” Trace asked. “You never came back for your speeder, and-”

”It’s a long story.” Ahsoka breathed, “And I’ll explain it to you both, but right now my friend needs medical attention.”

”There’s a clinic around the corner.” Rafa said, eyeing Anakin cautiously, “We can take him, but isn’t it dangerous for you to be out here in the open like this... y’know, being an ex- _you-know-what_ and all?”

”I can’t take him to a clinic. It’ll leave him too exposed.” Ahsoka shook her head, asked, desperate, “Do you have anything in your hangar?”

”We installed a med-bay aboard the _Silver Angel_.” Trace began after a moment. Ahsoka noticed her gaze moving from the Imperial insignia on her uniform to her prosthetic leg with uncertainty. “What kind of medical attention does he need?”

”He needs oxygen, and quickly.” Ahsoka continued, “I’ll explain why I look like this, just _please_ help me help him first. He’s going to die if we don’t get him air to breathe.”

”Why do I get the feeling you’re about to put as all in mortal danger?” Rafa asked, but grabbed one of Anakin’s legs anyway. Trace grabbed the other. Together, all three of them lifted.

”Ugh!” Rafa exclaimed, arms shaking as she helped suspend him, “Is your friend even human? He weighs as much as a robot!”

It took some effort and maneuvering, but when they finally got him aboard the _Silver Angel_ and into the med-bay and on a med-bed, Trace went to work immediately in starting up her oxygen resupply. Ahsoka inspected the helmet, trying to figure out how to get it off.

”Rafa.” Ahsoka asked, “Can you hold his head up while I take off the helmet?”

Rafa’s expression indicated that that was the _last_ thing she wanted to do, but she helped nonetheless, taking Anakin by his shoulders and grunting as she pulled him into a semi up-right position. Ahsoka hurried with the removal, hands shaking. Too focused was she on taking off the back, peeling away the front and then strapping the oxygen mask to his face, however, that she didn’t bother to really look at him until...

“ _Aw!_ ” Rafa grimaced, face twisting in disgusted horror as she dropped him, “What the... what is _wrong_ with him?”

Ahsoka turned from Trace, whose own eyes had widened considerably at the sight of him, turned back and looked down...

... to discover Anakin’s face pale and sickly, devoid of all hair. His skin was _waxy_ , like it had been _melted_. Scars perpetrated the skin around his skull, cheeks, nose, lips... every bit of him was, as Rafa had claimed, _wrong_. But his breath steamed against the oxygen mask. He took in several lungfuls of air, coming to slow consciousness.

”Okay.” Rafa began, shaking her head and throwing up her hands, “We helped your friend, now you need to start explaining yourself. I _finally_ want to hear your _complicated story_ , Ahsoka.”

”Okay...” Ahsoka said, “Let me just...”

She took Anakin by his shoulders, shook him until he opened his eyes. He looked at her, looked past her...

”It’s going to be okay.” Ahsoka told him. “These are my friends, the ones I was telling you about. They just _saved_ your _life_. I have to go do something. I need you to _stay here_. Please. _Please_ stay here.”

He said nothing, made no gesture that he’d understood or was going to listen. Ahsoka released him after a moment, forcing herself to trust that he just _would_.

”I’ll be back.” She promised. She pointed and added, clipped, “ _Do not move_.”

And with that she exited the _Silver Angel_ , Trace and Rafa on her heels. She sat with them in the hangar, told them everything in as minimal detail as possible from the moment she’d left their mech-bay with Bo-Katan to the moment she’d arrived at their doorstep, an unconscious Anakin in her arms. She left out a few moments, however, such as the rituals and the world between worlds and the finding out she was an almost-deity. But they were, she reasoned with herself, necessary obfuscations. There was probably only so much Trace and Rafa were willing to believe, we’re able to comprehend and fathom.

Ahsoka herself was still finding it all difficult to accept.

When she’d finished recounting to them the last year, Rafa stood up abruptly, disappeared into the apartment attached to the side of the hangar and re-emerged moments later with two glasses and a bottle of some type of alcohol. She poured a drink, handed it to Ahsoka. Ahsoka took it, dumbfounded, watched as Rafa poured herself a drink as well and then _clinked_ their glasses together.

”Drink up.” Rafa said, downing her glass in three quick gulps. She wiped at her mouth with the back of her hand once she was finished and said, “I needed one just listening to you, so I _know_ you need one, too.”

”... I’ve never drank, before.” Ahsoka said, eyeing the liquid warily.

”Hey!” Trace asked indignantly, “Why don’t I get one?”

”Because you’ve gotta fly the ship when we leave.” Rafa explained, “You can’t be drunk piloting.”

”... _Leave?_ ” Ahsoka asked faintly.

”Well, _obviously_.” Rafa deadpanned, rolling her eyes, “You think we aren’t going to leave, after everything you just told us? We’re _harboring_ enemies of the _Empire!_ ”

“Please, Rafa... Trace...” Ahsoka started, dismayed, “I didn’t know who else to turn to. I... I _need_ your help.”

”... Were you listening to what I was saying?” Rafa asked. She enunciated her every word when she continued, “ _We are leaving_. It was _implied_ that you would be _leaving_ with us.”

Ahsoka blinked. ”... _What?_ ”

”Being a prisoner sure has made you sharp.” Rafa said sarcastically. She then asked, more serious, “Did you really think we weren’t going to help you after everything you just told us?”

”... You weren’t exactly chomping at the bit to, before.” Ahsoka responded quietly, referring to the year previous when they’d first met.

”That was before _you_ helped _us_.” Rafa said pointedly, “It’s a life debt, even though technically we’ve already repaid it. Right, Trace?”

Trace only nodded her head, but there was still worry writ large in her features. She regarded Ahsoka with concern and asked,

”Are you _okay_?”

Ahsoka blinked again, taken aback, and asked, ”What?”

”Everything you just told us...” Trace said, “You’ve... you’ve been through things I can’t even _imagine_. How can you even trust that guy, after what he did to you?”

”It’s... complicated, Trace.”

” _Sounds like._ ” Rafa scoffed, pouring herself another drink.

”I just need you both to trust me.” Ahsoka pleaded. “I’m putting you in danger, and that fact hasn’t escaped me. But I’m at your mercy. I didn’t know who else I could go to. It seems like most of the galaxy has turned their backs on the Jedi.”

” _You_ are a Jedi again?” Rafa asked.

”No...” Ahsoka said, setting her still-full drink aside. “But I wanted to be. I wanted to go back, once the war was over. I wanted to... I wanted us to go back to what we’d been before the war. I wanted to be the kind of Jedi you two believed in.”

Rafa and Trace exchanged a long look. Ahsoka suspected they were communicating in the way only people who’d known each other their entire lives could.

”It’s a good thing you didn’t go back to being a Jedi.” Rafa said eventually, finally setting her drink aside. She cracked a tiny smile and added, “Or else, you wouldn’t be here to screw our lives up even more.”

Ahsoka understood she was trying to make a joke, to lighten the mood, but Ahsoka couldn’t bring herself to laugh. She stared hard at her lap, willing away the tears that threatened to rise at the thoughts of her fallen, fellow Jedi.

Rafa, seeming to realize she was struggling, turned to Trace and instructed, “Go inside and gather up our valuables.”

Trace did, albeit reluctantly, eyeing Ahsoka as she entered the apartment. When she was gone, Rafa said, “I’m sorry. That was in poor taste. Where are we going, though? Do you have an actual plan, or are we just free-flying it?”

”... I have a plan.” Ahsoka said eventually. She stood, eyeing the _Silver Angel_. “But it means you two have to leave without me.”

”Why?” Rafa asked, “Shouldn’t we be getting out of here together, like, _right now_?”

”You two should be.” Ahsoka corrected, explaining, “But I have to stay a little bit longer. There’s more people I promised I’d help.”

”Then we’ll stay and help you.” Trace resolved, emerging from the apartment with two duffle bags strapped around her shoulders.

”That was quick.” Rafa commented, crossing her arms.

”It’s not like we have a lot of stuff.” Trace defended, then asked, “So, Ahsoka, where are we headed? Who are we helping?”

”No, Trace, you can’t go with me.” Ahsoka shook her head apologetically and explained, “What I have to do is really dangerous. You and Rafa have to take Anakin and get out of the system. When I’ve completed my mission, I’ll contact you, and we can rendezvous somewhere safe. Somewhere _safer,_ anyway _.”_

”Where should we go, while we wait for you?” Rafa asked.

” _Anywhere_ but here.” Ahsoka responded, “It’s best that I don’t know, just incase I’m captured again.”

”What if your friend doesn’t want to go with us?” Trace asked.

”... Then tranq him.” Ahsoka said. “I’m giving you permission to do whatever you have to do to keep him compliant.”

”You better not take long.” Rafa pointed at her, “And you better not _die_ and leave us alone with him for the rest of our lives.”

”Rafa’s drunk.” Trace said, waving her sister off, “Don’t listen to her.”

”I am not drunk!” Rafa interjected, “I don’t get drunk _that_ quickly.”

”But don’t get captured.” Trace added to Ahsoka, “ _Seriously_. And don’t _die_ , either.”

”I‘m not going to get captured _or_ die.” Ahsoka promised them, voice graver than she’d intended it to be when she muttered, “Definitely not going to _die_ , anyway.”

Trace and Rafa looked at her worriedly, looked at one another. Rafa shrugged helplessly, started for the ship...

”Take this.” She said when she returned. It was a hologram device. “Contact us with it when you’re ready to meet us.”

”We should have a code-phrase.” Trace suggested as Ahsoka slipped it into the pocket on her belt, “In case something goes wrong.”

”Good idea.” Ahsoka said. “How about, if either of us is in danger or has been compromised, we’ll greet each other with the words: clearance codes didn’t check out.”

”Okay.” Rafa agreed, but then gestured to the ship and said, “Care to explain to your friend what you plan? I doubt he’d take it well from either of us, based on everything you told us about him.”

Ahsoka nodded, took a deep breath and started forward. Trace and Rafa followed silently behind. They all boarded the ship, and the sisters peered around the med-bay door as Ahsoka approached Anakin’s side. Trace waved, caught her attention, pointed at a drawer below the bed. Ahsoka extended it, found a row of tranquilizer shots inside. She grabbed one of them discreetly, positioned it in her palm. Anakin appeared to be asleep, but as she neared his eyes snapped opened, landed on her. Ahsoka grabbed her old saber off his belt before he could so much as react and said, apologetic,

“Sorry, Master, but it’s for your own good.”

And then she injected the tranq into his neck, watched anger and a little bit of hurt momentarily seep into his expression before his eyes fluttered shut. His entire body went slack.

”Keep an eye on him.” Ahsoka warned the sisters, “He’s more resilient than most. I doubt the tranqs will keep him down for long.”

The sisters shared a glance.

”... I’m flying the ship!” Trace declared, racing to the cockpit. “Rafa has to watch him!”

”Hey!” Rafa yelled after her, “That isn’t fair! I’m _inebriated_! Are you really gonna make your drunk sister babysit the guy who could potentially remove one of her limbs?”

“Oh... _okay_.” Trace called back sarcastically, the eye-roll visible in her words, “ _Now_ you’re drunk.”

“ _Please_.” Ahsoka implored Rafa, “Be careful and be safe. I’d rather be the first to make contact, but just incase anything goes wrong, don’t hesitate to reach out to me.”

”Rest assured.” Rafa promised, crossing her arms, “That if anything goes to the wayside I _will_ be holding you personally responsible.”

Ahsoka only nodded, moved to exit the ship when Rafa said to her, serious but softly,

”Be careful, Ahsoka.”

Ahsoka turned back to Rafa, managing a convincing smile and replied, “You, too.”

”Get this thing in the atmosphere!” Rafa yelled at Trace a moment later. Ahsoka hopped off the ship, watched it take to the air. Trace turned the ship around, waved at her through the viewport before pulling them up. Ahsoka stood on the landing pad, watched them go until they were nothing but a dot in the sky. Then, turning on her heel, she spotted the speeder she’d left with them all that time ago. It was stashed off to the side of the mech-bay, refurbished and ready to go.

”Thanks for holding on to it for me.” She whispered, smiling as she fired it up.

Ahsoka kicked it into gear, used it to fly out of the Underworld and onto the surface. The sun was coming up. An entire day and night had passed her by without her realizing. Ahsoka whipped the speeder around, ignoring her fatigue as she set off for the Works district. She turned her eyes to the sky once, a shadow falling over her, found Morai soaring above her...

... and she knew she wasn’t alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> november 2nd, 2020 update: long overdue shoutout to HkHk for giving me the suggestion about ahsoka needing a drink. i was reading through the comments recently to get back in the writing groove and saw the conversation we’d had about it. i’d meant to dedicate this chapter to them and forgot,, :( i’m so sorry. so, to HkHk — Rafa busting out the space alcohol was for you


	19. Recapitulate

Rex looked up, tried to peer through the exhaust that hovered like smog above the streets, but the cover was too thick. He turned to Cody, who coughed against the fumes. His own eyes watered. The air was bad, but they’d ditched their helmets after they’d discovered that the filters didn’t factor out the noxious fumes. Body armor had really downgraded since the war.

Rex knew if they stayed much longer in the Works district their lungs would shrivel. But Morai had led them here, and he trusted she wouldn’t have done so without reason. Reminded of that, Rex pointed toward an abandoned factory, the door of which hung open just ahead of them, and they made their cautious way inside.

“I shot him down, Rex...” Cody muttered. They sat together on one of the conveyor belts. Cody held his head in his hands, recounting the events of Order 66 in a quiet, strained voice. “I watched him fall. I didn’t bat an eye. I didn’t even feel remorse.”

”It was the chip,” Rex reminded him. He looked his brother over, noted the way he faintly shook. Rex reached in the pack he’d snagged before they’d fled the military facility, rooted around until he found a ration bar and a canister of water. He nudged Cody’s arm, passed the items off. Cody took them absently, drank absently and chewed absently.

”It wasn’t you, Cody.”

Rex watched him with uncertainty. He’d never seen Cody like this. They’d been designed to withstand any and all stressors — but Cody especially had been the epitome of strength, during the war. He’d been renowned for it.

Rex reached up, hand hesitating a fraction of an inch above Cody’s plated shoulder. He swallowed hard, moved his hand to the nape of his neck and squeezed. Comfort among brothers had been rare, the need for it even rarer. The most anyone had allowed themselves when it _was_ needed were simple touches, or lighthearted jeers meant to distract from the kind of hurt that couldn’t be seen on the flesh, but was just as real.

”General Kenobi sent an encrypted signal to any survivors,” Rex began. “Ahsoka told me the only way he could’ve accomplished that was if he’d infiltrated the Temple after... after everything.”

”But you said she’d searched for him in the Force,” Cody reminded, voice thick, “And she couldn’t find him.”

Rex rubbed his forehead with his free hand and said, with as much conviction as he could muster, “I don’t have all the answers, Cody. And I don’t want to give you false hope. I can tell you that I’m certain that Kenobi survived Utapau, though. He made it back to Coruscant. After that, I don’t know. But I know you didn’t kill him.”

“... I’m sorry about Jesse, about everyone,” Cody said after an uncomfortable silence.

”We’ve all been through it,” Rex responded with a sigh. He’d mourned on end. He didn’t want to mourn anymore. The silence relapsed. Rex watched Cody, and Cody watched the ground. They were unmoving pieces in an ever moving galaxy, so when the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end, Rex knew he was being watched. Cody’s barely audible inhale alerted him that the Commander had felt the same. With only a glance for confirmation, they sprung up at the same time, blasters at the ready, whirled to face the entrance...

... only to find that their assailant wasn’t an assailant at all. It was—

“ _Ahsoka?_ ”

She stood in the doorway, mouth agape, Morai on her arm. Rex blinked, dropped his blaster. He was moving before he even realized it, kicking up the dust on the floor as he ran. She met him halfway, Morai flying back into the street, disappearing through the exhaust. He took what he could of her in. She wore dark robes embossed with Imperial insignia and heavy bags framed her eyes. Exhaustion clung to her like the smog outside the factory’s windows clung to the streets, but she was real, and she confirmed it when she reached out to him, wrapped him so suddenly in her arms that it momentarily threw his balance. Rex stood for a moment, unblinking, before he returned her embrace tenfold. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, faintly trembled. Rex pulled back just enough to look her over once more, discovered that her leg...

”Rex,” she breathed, before he could so much as fully react. Her wide eyes searched his face. “How are you here?”

”Morai.” He answered. It was answer enough. He grabbed Ahsoka by her shoulders and asked, harder than he’d intended, “What _happened_ to you?”

Ahsoka’s gaze shuttered. He lowered himself to catch her eyes and asked, softer, “How could you leave me with a message like that? Huh, kid? I was so _worried_.”

”I’m sorry.” She whispered, finally looking at him again. She grabbed his wrists in a reassuring hold and said, voice breaking, “Rex, I’m _so_ sorry. I’m so glad to see you.”

And then she was crying, her tears silent. She seemed to be unaware of them as they slipped from her eyes. She looked at him with so much anguish and relief. Rex reached up hesitantly, less sure of himself and what comfort he could offer than he had been just months ago. He let his digits hover just over her cheeks, pressed his thumbs to the flowing tears — as if his touch would stem their steady stream. Ahsoka only cried harder, lowered her face. He cradled her head delicately, let her grief wash over his hands. She gasped,

”I never thought I’d see you again. A part of me... a part of me thought for a moment that I... that we might never—”

”Commander,” said Cody, effectively breaking the spell. Whatever words she’d been about to say died in her throat. Ahsoka looked up. Rex turned to find his brother standing beside them. Cody gave Ahsoka a concerned, if bewildered look. 

”Cody,” Ahsoka gasped, once the shock of seeing him had worn off. Rex dropped his hands. She reached for Cody a second later, and to Rex’s quiet shock, Cody reached back. They held each other’s arms in greeting. Ahsoka asked, wryly, “I guess Morai brought you two together?”

”You would guess correctly,” Cody confirmed, releasing her only after she’d released him. Rex noted his gaze traveled and fastened suddenly to three distinct places across her person: first, her sleeve’s shoulder, where the Imperial logo branded itself, then to her right leg, plated and faintly whirring as she shifted — last was her lightsaber, the same one Rex remembered watching her drop at the site of the graves. Rex blinked, stunned. He hadn’t even noticed it at first, the image of it on her hip so ingrained in his memory that it had slipped his notice.

”I’ll explain everything,” she promised them. She looked between them, desperate and tired, and pleaded, “Please, it’s not— none of this is what it looks like.”

”What is it supposed to look like?” Rex asked. He reached for her again, fingers curling around her shoulder. He suddenly had the feeling that she might float away, if he didn’t tether her down.

”Just let me explain,” she asked of them again, asked of _Cody_ , who Rex realized now regarded her with a level of suspicion he hadn’t before. “ _Please_.”

Cody nodded after a long, tense beat. His jaw working, his gaze guarded, he gestured them inside.

* * *

Ahsoka told them about everything that had happened to her. She spared no detail with them, unlike how she had with Trace and Rafa, trusting them with the things she’d experienced, knowing they both needed to hear it to understand — but especially that Cody needed to hear it. She’d recognized the look in his eye when he’d looked upon her and her uniform and her leg. There was familiarity, fear. He knew of the Inquisitors, and he’d confirmed as much later, once she’d finished her retelling. With remorse he’d said,

”I’m sorry, Commander Tano. I should have trusted you’d never join their ranks willingly.”

”It’s alright, Cody.” She reassured him, “It’s hard to know who to trust anymore. You were justifiably cautious. I understand.”

And then she went immediately into explaining what she had planned regarding her plan of infiltration and extraction. She could tell Rex didn’t want to hop subject, that he wanted to go back and address everything she’d just divulged, but Ahsoka wasn’t ready to breech such things. Not yet. And so Cody, seeming to recognize that, started brainstorming operations with her. Rex joined the discussion seconds later, and she pretended she didn’t see the wary looks he kept giving her as they plotted. Regardless, Ahsoka was grateful for their input and involvement. It hadn’t even been a question of if they’d help, or if she even needed it. They’d just fallen immediately into making themselves part of the operation.

 _Loyalty_ , rang Anakin’s words from what felt like so long ago, _means everything to the Clones_.

When the three of them settled upon the plan of action they most preferred, Cody took the speeder to find weapons they would need to perform it. When he was gone, Rex turned to Ahsoka and said, sorrowfully,

”You’ve been through a lot, kid.”

Ahsoka wrapped her arms around herself, looked down.

”Talk to me,” Rex encouraged softly. “I’d like to know how you’re feeling.”

”I don’t _know_ how I feel,” Ahsoka confessed. She’d had neither the time nor the luxury yet to consider such a thing. She’d reacted to things in the moment how she’d reacted to them, but she knew as time passed, and if she had time to dwell on all that had occurred, she was bound to eventually feel differently. It’s why she hadn’t allowed herself to think too much or too critically about Anakin and Barriss, beyond acknowledging her own willingness to forgive them, because... what if she came to resent them? What if she later decided she’d forgiven them too easily? What would she do then?

”Maybe hearing what you think will help me,” Ahsoka tried. She crossed her arms, tried to belie the tremor that traveled down her body. She couldn’t meet Rex’s gaze, too ashamed, too terrified what she might find in his eyes as he regarded her. But he only said, his gentle hand once more coming to rest down atop her shoulder,

”I feel that... that you’re _alive_ , and that’s what matters most to me. I feel that I trust your judgement, and that if you say the General and Barriss Offee are on our side again, then I believe you. I feel that if the General is willing to fix the problems he’s started, and that if you’ve forgiven him and Offee, then... I can forgive them both, too. One day. But not... yet. I can’t yet. All I can do is be grateful that they’ve helped you.”

Hesitantly, hopefully, Ahsoka looked up. Rex’s expression was heartbreaking, but it wasn’t filled with derision or contempt or any of the other things she’d feared she’d find — instead, she found only quiet trust, wonder and affection so strong she thought she could taste it. Within Ahsoka, something unfurled. She felt herself unwind like coiled rope, slump as strings might pool to a floor.

”I understand.” She assured him, reaching up to wrap her fingers around his hand. She squeezed once, and he turned his hand over, squeezed back. For a long time they sat like that, connected by touch, and then the sound of the speeder she’d lent Cody reached her ears. He came in after moments, depositing newly acquired gear down.

Ahsoka inspected it all quickly as Rex and Cody strapped themselves up. A sniper rifle, a belt of smoke bombs and another of actual bombs. There was a set of holsters and blaster pistols. Not quite DC-17’s, but Rex smiled appreciatively at Cody anyway. He made quick work of strapping them to his thighs.

”Where’d you get all of this?” Ahsoka asked.

”The Underworld’s arms dealers finally proved they were good for something.” Cody answered, small smirk uplifting the side of his mouth.

”All of this must’ve cost a fortune,” Rex commented. “How’d you pay?”

”I emptied my funds.” Cody replied, “Which means if headquarters hasn’t realized I’m gone by now, they will soon.”

”Then we should be going.” Ahsoka ascertained. She started for the speeder, straddled it and started it. Rex and Cody saddled in behind her, back to back as she took to the sky. She made sure they were hanging on before she flew them top speed towards the Inquisitors Headquarters.

* * *

It was as stealth as stealth could be, having blown open one side of the building. After Rex had secured the bomb and hit the detonator, Ahsoka sped them away from the blast zone and up to the hangar, had Cody take the handles as she cut open an entrance big enough for them to slip through. Once they were inside, Ahsoka ignored the alarms and tried for the lifts. As she’d suspected, they’d been suspended. Using the Force, she separated the doors, peered through...

”Okay.” Ahsoka said, “I’m headed down. Do you remember where to find the kids?”

”Level 261.” Rex responded, he and Cody prepping their grappling hooks. He nodded at her, reassured, “We’ll be fine. Go.”

Ahsoka nodded, jumped...

... landed after several seconds atop the stalled lift. She cut a hole in its top, jumped down, checked the floor.

Level 92. Still a ways to go to get to Barriss.

Ahsoka cut another hole in the floor of the lift, jumped down, plunged the saber into the wall and used it to slow her descent. She mentally ticked off each floor as she slid down, jumping onto what little ledge existed at the door when she’d made it to level 54. Pushing the doors open, she peered around the wall, looked out...

... found, of all people, Vaneé waiting at the the end of the hall for her.

”Lady Inquisitor.” He greeted when she stepped out, forgoing the usual bow. A sneer twisted his face. The black of his iris had bled into his sclera, and the pupil had turned a vibrantly viscous red. Ahsoka’s breath caught. The only other being she’d seen with eyes like that had been...

”You’re him,” Ahsoka said, grabbing the sword from her belt, letting it extend. She kept the lightsaber ignited in the other. “You’re _The_ _Son_.”

”A reincarnation,” Vaneé corrected.

”How are you here?” Ahsoka asked, taking a defensive stance. Her brow-line lowered considerably as she further regarded him.

”I am here, because the Chosen One is here,” he responded simply. “I know where you’ve been, Tano. I know what she showed you. She did not show you everything. There is more than one way to attach oneself to a mortal. I showed him the future, tried to set for him a different path. But my Father meddled. And so everything I tried to prevent came to pass.”

”You turned him to the dark side,” Ahsoka accused, remembering the cold she’d felt when Obi-Wan had informed her that Anakin had joined with the Son, when she’d had to undo her repairs to their shuttle and cling to the ceiling just to protect herself. “How he got there didn’t matter to you.”

”No,” Vaneé - _The Son_ \- agreed. Voice low and sinister and seething hate, he continued, “But what does matter to me is that he stays there. And so long as you live, you threaten my plans.”


	20. Resurgence

Suddenly, so many things were making sense: Vaneé’s cryptic smiles, the feeling he’d invoked in her whenever she’d been in his presence — the kind that had made her wonder if she’d met his expectations, the kind that had left her cold. Those feelings and reactions were remnants, she suspected, that lingered from her possession. The Son was an influence, just like Sidious. He had killed her once, corrupted her and killed her.

And he planned to kill her again.

Ahsoka readjusted her grip on both blades, her only action that betrayed her uncertainty. The Daughter had retained some semblance of her former abilities, Ahsoka knew, for Morai came and went as she pleased. But what of The Son? What were his capabilities? He was dark side incarnate, and he’d gone this long without being detected by Anakin; she suspected not even Sidious himself knew the attendant’s true identity, for if he did, she felt in no uncertain terms that something would have been done about him.

Vaneé raised his hands, and lightning crackled to life at his fingertips. Ahsoka raised her saber quickly, and red clashed against red. She grunted as the force of his onslaught drove her back. She shifted her feet, readjusted her stance. Gritting her teeth, Ahsoka focused solely on the energy, drew it to her blade until it evaporated. When it released, she panted, stepped away from the lift’s edge. He’d pushed her almost entirely out of the hallway.

”My sister’s life is _wasted_ on you,” Vaneé snarled.

”I didn’t choose this,” Ahsoka huffed, rolling her shoulders. She flipped the blade Shmi had bestowed her around in her hand. “But I can assure you — her life isn’t wasted.”

And with that she charged, using the Force to propel her forward. She plunged the blade into the folds of Vaneé’s dark robes, let it sink with a sickening squelch. Vaneé laughed, the rumble low and chilling and frenzied. Red filled his mouth, coated his teeth. Ahsoka pulled the blade loose, and his blood sprayed across her front. He dropped in a heap to the floor.

He wheezed, a crazy look in his eyes. “My sister would never have done that.”

Ahsoka took a step back. His skin started to ashen, disintegrate...

”I’m not your sister.”

”No...” Vaneé croaked. He coughed, and more blood spilled from the corner of his mouth.

“You are a _survivor_ ,” he continued, the way he said survivor making the word sound vile.

”You may have won this round,” Vaneé spat, “but remember this: so long as Vader serves the darkness, I will regenerate. I will return, and each time I do, I will have regained a bit more of my original strength.”

”You won’t be regenerating,” Ahsoka avowed. “Not if I have anything to say about it.”

And then he was gone, robes sinking around his dissipating form. Ahsoka stomped across the cloth with one foot just to be sure — his ashes plumed like smoke. When she’d confirmed he was really gone, Ahsoka clipped the blades to her belt and moved ahead.

”Barriss!” She called, relying on her knowledge of the buildings layout to direct her. On her level, the hall with her bedroom had been to the left of the lifts. She turned left, hitting the access panel on every door. She was greeted with faces, some sentient, some not — none Barriss.

”Go,” she told each of them with urgency. “You’re free.”

Some scrambled to their feet, taking off instantly. Some eyed her warily, retreated further into their rooms. Others seethed at her, spitting insults. Ahsoka had forgotten — some people believed in the Empire and it’s vision. They’d chosen to be where they were.

”Barriss!” She called again, tearing away. She couldn’t worry about the ones that didn’t want her help. She neared the halls end, hit the second to last access panel, did a double take—

And there Barriss was, in the center of the room, rising slowly from the floor...

... but she wasn’t alone.

” _Well, well, well..._ ” Seventh Sister drawled, smirking. She leaned against the wall in a leisurely manner, arms crossed as she looked Ahsoka up and down. Her little droid buzzed just above her shoulder, snapping its clawed appendages at Ahsoka as Seventh continued, “It looks like my theory about the explosion was correct, Offee. Your little girlfriend came back for you after all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry about the short updates — I’m doing this in part to keep things suspenseful and to keep you all, my lovely readers, on your toes!! lol
> 
> (there is the potential for additional chapters to be added though — however I kindly ask that no one hold me to this. this is just a possibility at this point. it depends on how lengthy (or not lengthy) each new chapter gets)
> 
> thank you all so much for sticking with me thus far. it’s been a wild ride writing this so I imagine it’s been much the same reading it. I appreciate every comment, kudos and bookmark that I get. I love engaging with you all so my hope is that you never feel like you can’t drop in and say something <333


	21. Rescue pt. V

“ _Seventh_ ,” Ahsoka began in a warning tone. She grabbed the saber off her belt, thumb hovering just above the activator. “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll _get_ _out_ of my way.”

Seventh rolled her eyes, but her careful movements — coupled with her anxiety that rippled through the Force — betrayed her outwardly calm demeanor. She peeled herself away from the wall, stood too-still in the center of the room. Around them, the alarms continued to blare incessantly. Without letting her gaze stray from Ahsoka’s own, Seventh motioned her droid forward with her chin. The droid zipped between them, barreled towards Ahsoka...

Ahsoka ignited her saber, held the droid at bay with blade’s end. The droid faltered, flew back an inch and looked between them rapidly.

”What is this?” Ahsoka asked, angry and confused.

“I was _spying_ on you,” Seventh reminded her, tone exasperated. “I know about your conversation with Offee — your plot to bust her out. _And_ I know about the Clones in the crèche.”

Ahsoka bared her teeth, pushed the blades tip to Seventh’s throat. Her droid squawked, went as if to grab Ahsoka’s wrist. Ahsoka shoved them back with the Force — they hit the ground with a clang, deactivated and didn’t get back up. Seventh swallowed hard, tilted her chin up and continued, panic tinging her tone, “ _Relax_. I don’t know how you managed to get them on your side, and I don’t care — you’re getting the children out, right? That’s all that matters to me. I came to help. Tell her, Offee.”

Ahsoka looked at Barriss, bewildered. Barriss shook her head helplessly and said in a rush, “She came here a little after the explosion. I don’t know if she’s telling the truth, but she hasn’t hurt me. She was waiting for you.”

”Search your _feelings_ ,” Seventh implored mockingly. Under her breath she muttered, “Or whatever the Masters used to teach us.”

Ahsoka considered Seventh. She’d yet to make a move for her saber, and she held her hands up in supplication. She seemed scared, impatient... but genuine.

After several moments, Ahsoka retracted her blade.

”If you’re lying...” Ahsoka promised her in a hardened voice, leaning in close to get the point across, “You’ll _regret_ it.”

“I’m not that dim-witted. I know I can’t fight you,” Seventh responded shakily, hand traveling to her throat. She grimaced, unclipped her lightsaber from her belt and slowly held it out. Ahsoka moved around the room, kicked the downed droid out of her way and placed herself between Seventh and Barriss.

”Here.” Seventh extended her arm, offering the lightsaber over. Petulantly she added, “If it would make you _feel better..._ ”

Ahsoka considered it, took it, used one of its blades to cut Barriss free of her inhibitors. She handed it to her a moment after. Barriss took it in trembling hands, swayed a moment on her feet. She clutched her head. Ahsoka held onto her arm until the rush of reconnecting with the Force had passed, and then she turned to Seventh and asked, suspicious and clipped,

”Why are you doing this? Why are you helping us? I’m not foolish enough to believe that you’re on anybody’s side but your own.”

”You let _me_ worry about my motivations,” Seventh said. She reached down for her droid, reactivated them and then gestured them again to go to Ahsoka’s side. Reluctantly, they did. At Ahsoka’s raised brow, Seventh explained, “ID9 has some _very_ incriminating evidence stored away in their memory databanks. You might find it useful later on, if or when you get to wherever it is you’re going. Now, take my seeker and get out of here.”

With that, she started to make her way out the door. Ahsoka stopped her, grabbed her by her arm before she’d so much as taken a full step and asked, lowly, ” _Where_ are you going?”

”To distract the others,” Seventh huffed. She ripped her arm free of Ahsoka’s grasp before disappearing around the lip of the doorway. Ahsoka frowned, turned to face Barriss. She took a deep breath, wrapped Ahsoka in an unexpected arm. Ahsoka stilled, stiffened...

”You’re alive,” Barriss sighed with relief. “I can’t believe it. The Emperor claimed he’d killed you.”

Slowly, Ahsoka disentangled herself from Barriss, stepped back and said, “We need to leave.”

Barriss’s features flashed momentary hurt, but she nodded anyway, readjusted her grip on Seventh’s saber’s hilt and said, determined, “Let’s go.”

* * *

“There’s a ship in the hangar,” Ahsoka explained. She’d spotted it on her way in, before she’d made her way down the building. “I need you to prep it and have it ready to go while I help Rex and Cody secure the children.”

They climbed up the lift, using the Force to propel their movements. They couldn’t take the stairs — not with the risk of that they might run into an Inquisitor looming over them. Or worse. But trouble found them regardless of their care.

”Ahsoka!” Barriss yelled, “Look out!”

Ahsoka barely had time to look up before a body collided with her own. She lost her handhold, went falling, hit the stalled lift they’d crested but moments ago with a terrible thud. Another body followed shortly after. Ahsoka groaned, rolled onto her side. Beside her, the Sixth Brother rose to his feet, ignited his saber...

”Ahsoka!” Barriss yelled again, almost dropping down beside them. Ahsoka pulled herself up and yelled back before she could, “Keep going! I’ll be fine!”

Barriss did so after a reluctant moment, nodding once before she turned and continued to climb. ID9 followed her. Ahsoka ignited her own saber, felt the pull of the ones that resided in Sixth’s saber’s hilt once again. Squaring her jaw, Ahsoka took a defensive stance. Sixth Brother seethed, started to prowl. They shifted around the tight space until—

He fell through the holes she’d cut out of the ceiling and floor from earlier. He screamed as he went, dropped his saber in the process. Ahsoka grabbed it out of the air, leaned over and peered through the openings and into the chasm below. From her level, she couldn’t see through to the bottom of the lift, but she had no doubt if she could, she’d find his still, unmoving body lying at its end.

”... That was easy,” Ahsoka murmured. Standing, she clipped her old saber and her newly acquired saber to her belt, gathered the Force around her and jumped as high as she could up through the lift. She landed just levels away from level 261, swung herself up and caught herself on the floors ledge. The doors were already opened. _Good_ , she thought. _Rex and Cody made it already_. Pulling herself up by her hands, Ahsoka crawled into the hall, took a moment to catch her breath and then hurried toward the crèche.

She stretched her awareness as she rounded the corner. Glass littered the floor — the transparisteel had been blown out. Ahsoka hopped the sill, found the bodies of the Nursemaids smoking and sparking on the floor. One of their masks had shifted, revealing their metal-plated face. _Droids_ , she realized faintly.

Ahsoka made her way swiftly through the crèche, all of the doors in her path being unlocked. She found Rex and Cody around the fifth room — a wide area with no discernible purpose — visibly unharmed and working to place wailing babies and toddlers into hovering prams.

”You haven’t encountered any Inquisitors?” She asked them, hurrying to help. They both startled slightly at her voice, but continued with their tasks.

”Not yet,” Rex responded.

”Don’t jinx us,” Cody reprimanded.

”There’s one more room.” Rex informed Ahsoka, “We haven’t accessed its door yet.”

”I’ll handle it.” Ahsoka said, skidding to a halt in front of said door. She unsheathed one of her sabers, stabbed the access panel through and used the Force to shift the door sideways and into the wall. She entered the darkened room, called out softly,

”Is anyone in here? Come out. We’re here to help you.”

”... Ashla?” Came a tiny voice, followed shortly by a sniffle. Ahsoka’s heart suspended, reanimated only after Hedala had emerged hesitantly from the shadows.

”Hedala,” Ahsoka gasped softly, dropping to her knees. She reached out her arms, too fast — Hedala flinched away from her, fear momentarily filling her eyes...

”Hedala...” Ahsoka whispered, “It’s me. It’s okay. You see?”

Ahsoka sat back on her knees, rested her hands against her lap and resisted the urge to scoop the girl up in her arms and start running. There was no telling what she’d been through, in these walls. Ahsoka didn’t want to scar her anymore than she already had been.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Hedala approached her. She reached up with her little hands, pressed her fingers to Ahsoka’s face. They stared at one another for a moment, Ahsoka barely breathing — and then Hedala was crying, crawling into her lap...

Ahsoka wrapped her in her arms, hugged her gently to her chest. Hedala wept horribly, full-body sobs that tore straight through Ahsoka like blaster bullets. Rising to her feet, Ahsoka checked the room for anymore children. When she found none, she hurried back to Rex and Cody, found an empty pram and tried to lower Hedala into it. Hedala shook her head, began to scream. Her fists curled into the front of Ahsoka’s suit. She clung to the cloth with everything she had.

”Hedala,” Ahsoka soothed, rubbing a hand up and down her back. “It’s okay. No one is going to hurt you anymore.”

”Don’t go!” Hedala sobbed. She buried her face in Ahsoka’s neck. Her tears seeped through the materials. “Please, Ashla. Don’t leave me alone again.”

”I’m not going anywhere,” Ahsoka promised, voice thick. She placed one hand to the crown of Hedala’s head, closed her eyes and concentrated. Slowly, Hedala’s grip began to loosen. Though she fought the suggestion to sleep, Hedala succumbed to it eventually. Only when her hiccuping cries had subsided did Ahsoka set the child gently down into the pram.

”What did you do?” Rex asked.

”Sleep suggestion,” Ahsoka huffed, closing the pram. She leaned against the wall, shook off sudden lightheadedness. “It takes... a lot of focus.”

She surveyed the space, dismayed to find only seven prams — including Hedala’s own — hovering around the room. They were closed, some of the infants within them beating against the encasing, crying out in vain. Ahsoka’s heart _panged_. Sidious had referred to Hedala as patient number nine...

”There aren’t anymore kids?” She asked.

”That was the last room,” Cody confirmed, pointing to the one she’d just pulled Hedala from. Ahsoka lowered her gaze. That meant...

That meant that at least two children had perished in between the time it had taken her to discover the crèche and then return. It had only been a matter of days. Ahsoka screwed her eyes shut. _It had only been a number of days._

”You look like you’re about to pass out on your feet, Commander,” Cody voiced his concern.

”I’ll be fine,” Ahsoka muttered, and she knew it wasn’t convincing. She took a moment to allow her grief and anguish wash over her, and then she refocused her attention and activated the _follow_ key on Hedala’s pram, turned to the next nearest pram and repeated the process. Rex and Cody followed suit, and soon all of the prams were following them out of the crèche and into the hall. Some of the children still cried, but at least now the sounds were muffled. Before they departed the floor, they each took a few explosives, worked to place them up and down the halls.

”We’ll detonate when we’re clear,” Cody said, activating them. He hooked the detonator to his belt and they all hurried to the lift.

”It’s been too quiet for too long,” Rex whispered as he and Cody prepped their grappling hooks. They leaned out of the lift’s door, aimed them and shot them off. When they connected with the ceiling far above, they started working their way up. Ahsoka waited for the prams to follow, then shortly worked her own way out.

”Don’t _jinx_ us,” Cody reprimanded, again.

“I’m just saying...” Rex continued, deep frown settling into his features. “Our missions were never this easy in the past.”

Ahsoka pushed up one of the prams that had started lagging behind and informed,

“We’ve had some inside help.”

When Rex and Cody gave her an incredulous look, Ahsoka waved them off and said, “I’ll explain once we’re out of here. Just focus on climbing for now.”

They fell into silence, but not a moment after she’d spoken did Rex’s rope snap. He plummeted, arms flailing. Ahsoka reached out with the Force, caught him mid-air...

”We’ve got company!” Cody yelled a second later. Ahsoka ground her teeth together, looked back over her shoulder. Far above them, a red blade cut through Cody’s rope. He didn’t fall however, having already found a foot and handhold on the side of the lift’s wall.

”I told you not to jinx us!” Cody shouted at Rex.

”I’m _sorry_ ,” Rex shouted back. “But maybe you can wait and give me grief about it after we escape!”

Ahsoka carried Rex to the wall, held him until he found his leverage and then kicked her way up. As she neared the Inquisitor, she was able to make out their features. It was the Second Sister.

And Second wasted no time on words, baring her teeth as she dived head first and straight for Ahsoka. Ahsoka lowered herself just above one of the doors, opened it with her mind, batted Second’s saber out of her hand and then grabbed her by her suits front and tossed her into the hall. Second went rolling across the floor, hit the wall at the end with a strangled grunt. Ahsoka closed the doors behind her, spared not a second in enveloping Rex and Cody and all the children in the Force. She bit her lip as she raised them up. Rex gave a startled shout, almost threw her concentration, but Ahsoka held on, didn’t let her control slip; she kept them all steady as she brought them ever higher. Ahsoka pushed them up to her level and then past, on and on until her arm shook from the strain...

”We’ve got it!” Rex shouted — and just in time. Ahsoka released them, slumped down, lost her foothold for a split second. She scrambled for the loose wires and pipes, adrenaline kicking her limbs and muscles back into high gear. She grabbed the wall, clung to it like a leach, took a gasping breath...

”Hurry it up!” Came a familiar voice. Ahsoka glowered, looked up to find Seventh peering down at her from two levels above with a scowl.

”I thought you were supposed to be distracting the Inquisitors,” Ahsoka accused.

”I _have been_ ,” Seventh defended, haughty and indignant. “But they’ve caught on to my ruse. Looks like I’ll be joining your escape party.”

Ahsoka said nothing to that, decided she’d deal with that when they reached the hangar. She climbed until she was at Seventh’s level, and then Seventh joined her. Together, they made haste. Once, when Ahsoka slipped, Seventh caught her by the back of her collar and held on until Ahsoka could regain her hold. Ahsoka nodded her gratitude, too tired to do much else. The sudden reminder that she hadn’t slept or eaten in over a day slowed her movements, made them sluggish. Seventh barked at her, “Hurry up!”

Finally, after what felt like too long climbing, they made it to the hangar. Ahsoka pulled herself through the parted lift doors, panting as she crawled her slow way to her feet. Across the cavernous room, Rex and Cody rushed the prams on board an idling ship. It resembled the model Vader had taken with the Inquisitors — sleek, grey and impersonal. Ahsoka started running, and Seventh shortly followed. Almost, almost...

The sound of a spinning blade reached her hearing too late. Ahsoka spun around just in time to watch the Grand Inquisitor — arm outstretched from where he’d thrown his saber — hoist himself up from out of the lift. She barely had time to push Seventh out of the way and then move herself before his blade ripped through her prosthesis, severing it at the calf. Ahsoka dropped, scrambled back. Someone yelled — Seventh rushed to her side, took her under the arms and hauled her up.

”Take off!” Seventh screamed, presumably to Cody and Rex. Seventh helped Ahsoka to stand, wrapped her arm under her shoulders and aided her in limping toward the ship that raised from the floor, started for the hangar doors...

”Ahsoka!” Rex yelled. He stood on the lowered skiff, moved as if to jump off. Ahsoka pushed him back with the Force, and he went skittering across the ramp and back into the hull. Cody emerged a second later, grabbed onto one of the ramp’s descenders with one hand, beckoned at them urgently with his other. Behind them, Ahsoka felt the Grand Inquisitor running full speed toward them, felt him call his saber back into his hand...

 _The children are going to be safe_ , she thought. _Rex and Cody and Barriss are going to be safe. Anakin was safe_. If something happened to her, Anakin would protect Trace and Rafa. She had to believe that.

The ship flew past the hangar’s doors, idled just before it. Seventh ran them to the ledge...

”Catch her!” Was the only warning Seventh gave any of them before she pushed Ahsoka out of the hangar with the Force. No control over her movements, Ahsoka’s stomach swooped. She caught the edge of the skiff with her hands, and then Rex and Cody had her, were pulling her bodily up and onto the ramp. Ahsoka turned around, reached out for Seventh who still stood inside the building. Seventh, who looked back...

”Jump!” Ahsoka yelled, “I’ll catch you!”

Seventh turned away from the Grand Inquisitor, shot her a desperate look. She took a few steps back, crouched low and took off at a sprint to build momentum. But it was too late. Ahsoka saw it coming before it even happened. Seventh was mid-jump when the Grand Inquisitor threw his saber like a javelin. Ahsoka tried to lift Seventh higher, tried to move her out of the sabers path, but the ship lurched, threw her focus. Ties had emerged, had fired upon them...

The Grand Inquisitor’s saber pierced Seventh right through her middle. She gasped on a cry, the sound swallowed by the screech of their assailants fighters. Seventh’s body went taught and then slack. The Grand Inquisitor tore his saber out with the Force, drew it back. Ahsoka reached out with both hands, guided her body down; Cody grabbed her when she was within reaching distance, dragged her into the ship, and Rex picked Ahsoka up not a moment after, carried her in as the ramp closed. Barriss flew them up and away, dodging blaster fire from the incoming ties that tried to blast them out of the sky.

”Get Barriss!” Ahsoka urged Cody. He rolled Seventh out on the floor, grabbed the detonator off his hip and pressed it as he ran for the cockpit. Outside of the ship, Ahsoka heard the explosion, felt the wave it created rock out of the building and into the hull. Rex set Ahsoka down, helped her maneuver Seventh into a more comfortable position. Seventh grunted as they shifted her, cried out in pain...

”Please, stop...” Seventh begged, tears filling her eyes. “It hurts too much.”

”You’re going to be okay,” Ahsoka told her. “Barriss can heal. She’ll help you.”

”She can’t heal this,” Seventh shook her head, breathing already growing shallow. She pressed one of her hands over her wound and sighed, raggedly, “I’m slipping. I can feel it. It’s too late—”

She coughed suddenly, words cutting. Ahsoka took her free hand, clutched it tightly. Seventh’s grip was weak, wasn’t there at all.

”Seventh...” Ahsoka tried.

“My name... isn’t Seventh...” She murmured, eyes fluttering shut. Ahsoka shook her, but she refused to open them again.

”Tell me,” Ahsoka urged softly. She could not give this girl absolution, but she could bury her with her identity — her _true_ identity — still intact.

”Sezja...” Sezja whispered weakly. “Sezja Yocinee.”

”Okay, Sezja...” Ahsoka whispered back, offering the girl what she could of comfort and warmth through the Force. It was the least she could do for her now, after she’d helped them escape.

”You were the only one... who was kind to me back there,” Sezja whispered. Ahsoka almost balked at the implication. She hadn’t been kind at all. She’d been harsh and mean. If she’d been the kindest person Sezja had encountered among the Inquisitors, then Sezja hadn’t encountered kindness at all.

Voice fading with every word, Sezja continued, “Take care of the children. Don’t let them... take any more. And Nur... go to Nur... destroy the fortress under the water. It’s where they take Jedi, make them into Inqusitors. _Promise me_ you’ll destroy it.”

Sezja held on until Ahsoka gave her the assurance that she would, and then her head fell to the side, the arm resting atop her stomach going slack and slipping down. Ahsoka sat back with a heavy sigh after, released Sezja’s hand and met Rex’s eyes. He sat just beside her, reached out for her, moved his arms around her. Ahsoka let him help her up, let him carry her past the prams as the ship jostled from more blaster fire. Barriss came running down the hall a second later, ID9 at her side. Her expression went panicked and distraught at the sight before her.

”It’s too late.” Ahsoka said grimly, “She’s gone.”

”Oh...” Barriss murmured, breathing hard. ID9 flew to their creators side, making low, sad sounds as they nudged her limp arm. Barris tore her gaze away, gulped and said, “I’m returning to the bridge. Someone has to operate the guns.”

Ahsoka nodded. The ship gave another terrible lurch, sustaining further damage. Rex carried her to the nearest room, prams following behind. There was a bed in the wall. He lowered her down atop it.

”What are we going to do?” Rex asked her, referring to the children. Ahsoka frowned. Some of the younglings still cried, confused and entombed...

”First,” she responded hurriedly, “we need to open the prams. Let them see us.”

The ship lurched once again. Ahsoka had to hold onto the lip of the bed to keep from tumbling to the floor. Rex set about the task, and when the prams’ tops parted, Ahsoka guided them to her, attempted to soothe with words and gentle coos. Most of the children were inconsolable however, resisting the feelings of safety and comfort she attempted to ebb their way. But worse than the ones who’d made their faces ruddy and their eyes dry from their tears were the ones that were despondent, eyes void, reacting to nothing...

”I can’t do this right now,” Ahsoka gasped on a sob, the force of it tearing so suddenly through her that it left her shaking. Rex returned to her side, pulled her to his chest. She cried into his shoulder same as how Hedala had cried into hers — Hedala who was thankfully, blissfully, still asleep.

There was too much fear and confusion and unexplainable sadness rolling off the rest of the children, however — all in waves too big to swim beneath. They crashed down upon her one after the next, threatening to drown...

”You can’t help everyone, Ahsoka. And these younglings might be beyond it,” Rex reasoned. He slid his arms under the bend in her knees and the behind of her shoulder blades once more, lifted her up and hauled her out of the room. They left behind the hurting children, left behind Sezja Yocinee’s body — they’d have to move her to a preservation capsule soon, if the ship had any — and ID9 who’d curled up beside her hip, and entered the quiet of a new room right as they entered hyperspace. Ahsoka felt the sudden distancing from Coruscant, from Sidious and the Inquisitors and the dark side. The effect it wrought was almost instantaneous. A great weight seemed to lift from her chest, allowed her to better breathe. Ahsoka slumped against Rex’s shoulder. As her eyes fluttered shut she urged him,

”Take the hologram communicator out of my belt pocket. Contact Trace and Rafa and tell them ‘clearance codes checked out.’”

And then all of her senses fell away. Sleep, finally, had claimed her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, in the active process of writing: YOU get a redemption, and YOU get a redemption and EVERYBODY gets a redemption
> 
> Cody and Rex bickering like siblings is everything I needed and more from tcw so I had to include it here (I imagine their bickering in this moment could be chalked up to them trying to self soothe, though (distract from the chaos around them) which... kind of makes it heart-breaking, now that I think about it. literally everyone in this AU is on the verge of losing their minds)
> 
> \+ unrelated but something I discovered recently and thought was interesting: in the latinoamericano Español dub of tcw, Anakin refers to Ahsoka as “sabihonda” in place of snips. in the Español dub, he refers to her as “chulita.” it’s funny to me the disparity between these terms of endearment, because where Anakin calling her chulita means (in the context of their relationship) “my cute little girl,” (chula meaning “cute girl” and diminutive -ita meaning an affectionate “little”) sabihonda means, essentially, “know-it-all/wise ass.” 😆 I’ve been amused since discovering this and had to share


	22. Reunion pt. II

Rex woke her upon landing, gentle hand on her shoulder rousing her from sleep. Ahsoka blinked to slow awareness, sat up, went to throw her legs over the side of the bed before she remembered.

”I made you something,” Rex said, grabbing what appeared to be a makeshift crutch — finagled together, it seemed, with parts of a chair and other tech — from the floor. He explained as he handed it to her, “The craftsmanship is a bit shoddy, but... I reckon it’ll last you until we can find you a new prosthetic.”

Ahsoka smiled to herself, accepted it with both hands and said, gratefully, quietly, “Thank you, Rex.”

He smiled in return, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Ahsoka shimmied to the floor, took the crutch under her arm and walked to the door. When she stepped into the hall, she found it empty.

”We moved Yocinee’s body to the air-lock,” Rex informed before she could ask. “There’s no med-bay aboard this transport.”

Ahsoka asked, “Her droid?”

”Offee mentioned something about incriminating evidence. Cody’s in the cockpit, pilfering through its memory drive.”

Ahsoka nodded. Noting the stillness that surrounded their ship, she then asked, “Where are we?”

”Seelos. I contacted the Martez sisters. They’ll be here soon. That’s why I woke you. They were pretty insistent you be awake when they land.”

Ahsoka sighed, remembering, “Right, Anakin.”

”Offee is with the kids.” Rex continued, “She found some rations and managed to get most of them to eat, but the oldest one, Hedala...”

”I’ll talk to her.” Ahsoka said, starting for the room where they’d left the children. Inside, Barriss stood near the center, rocking one of the babies back and forth in her arms, trying to get them to sleep. She nodded at Ahsoka and Rex as they entered. Ahsoka kept her movements as quiet as possible as she approached Hedala’s pram, not wanting to disturb the slumbering room.

Hedala lied on her side, curled into the tightest ball she could properly accomplish. Ahsoka set a hand down on the lip of the pram. As she leaned down, her shadow falling over Hedala’s form, Hedala tensed and looked fearfully up — but when their eyes met the fear fell instantly away. Hedala shot up, wrapped her arms around Ahsoka’s neck and held on. Using her free arm, Ahsoka picked Hedala up and cradled her close.

”See?” She asked the child softly, voice nearly hoarse. “I didn’t go anywhere.”

”I missed you, Ashla.”

Ahsoka sighed, readjusted Hedala in her arm and then turned for the door. Rex stayed behind as she ventured back into the other room.

“I missed you, too, Hedala,” Ahsoka whispered when she’d managed to pull them both into the bed. She sat cross-legged, lowered Hedala into her lap and said, very softly but very seriously,

”Hedala, I have to tell you something.”

Hedala looked at her for a moment, eyes unreadable, and nodded.

”My name isn’t Ashla,” Ahsoka explained. “My name is Ahsoka. I had to lie and use a different name when I met you because bad people were after me.”

”The same bad people who took me?”

”Yes,” Ahsoka said, heart turning over in her chest. “Those same bad people. It’s why I disappeared one day and didn’t come back. I was running away from them. But they still managed to find me. They took me to the same place they took you.”

Hedala rested her hand down atop the severed prosthetic and asked, upset, ”Did they hurt you, too?”

Ahsoka closed her eyes, took a deep, shuddering breath. She held Hedala the tiniest bit tighter and murmured, “They won’t hurt you anymore, Hedala.”

Within Hedala, Ahsoka sensed so much confusion and unrest. Too much to wade through any one cause or factor, too much to dissect and disassemble and make sense of. Hedala and the other children needed help Ahsoka couldn’t offer. More than that, they needed help she didn’t feel emotionally equipped enough to give. Their recovery would be years coming.

“Hedala, I’m sorry I lied to you about my name.” Ahsoka apologized, “And I’m sorry I didn’t help you sooner. Please understand, I didn’t know the bad people had you. I had to be careful.”

”... I understand, Ahsoka.”

”Do you trust me, Hedala?”

”Yes,” Hedala nodded instantly, the truth of it so star-shattering. This little girl had lost everything... her family, her home; the feeling of safety attached to them, gone. But here she sat with Ahsoka, turning the truth of Ahsoka’s deception over and deciding it didn’t matter. To her, Ahsoka’s face was a face that could be trusted, her words accepted.

”Then I need you to trust my friends, too.” Ahsoka told her, “The people that were with you, when you woke up. They only want to help you.”

Hedala appeared to mule it over, face taking on a pensive expression. She blinked, moved her eyes to the door. Moments passed in quiet contemplation. Eventually, Ahsoka said,

”I have to go help someone, Hedala. They’ll be here soon. But I promise I’m not leaving you.”

Hedala asked, desperately, “Can I go with you?”

”No,” Ahsoka said softly, but leaving no room for argument. “The one I have to help is very unwell.”

And also, potentially a frightening figure who could send Hedala into a fit of panic. Ahsoka didn’t know if Vader had ever concerned himself with the younglings. Regardless of if Hedala had ever encountered him and equated him to a terrorizing figure... Hedala’s latent abilities in the Force — whatever they may be — would undoubtedly recognize him as someone frightening. One look at Anakin, one moment alone in his presence...

It could spell disaster.

”Okay...” Hedala said, though she clearly wasn’t happy about it. She leaned up in a hug, tucked her chin over Ahsoka’s shoulder and asked,

”Promise you’ll come back?”

”I promise, Hedala.”

* * *

Hedala went easier into the pram, the second time around. Barriss approached her with food and water and was accepted readily, if shyly. With Rex, Ahsoka exited their stolen ship and started for the refurbished AT-TE sitting just feet away atop the salt plain. In the distance, the sun over Seelos began to set.

”I made this my home, for awhile,” Rex told her. He patted the lowered underbelly of the AT-TE, dropped his arm after a moment with a sigh and said, “We never should have split up.”

Ahsoka looked at him, his saddened, regretful expression. It wasn’t a face she’d ever seen him sport, not until near the end of the war. The image of it now only served to remind her of how much had changed for them.

”It’s not your fault,” she reassured him. “If we’d stayed together... if we hadn’t stayed together... I think disaster was bound for us in either scenario. It just... found us a little faster this way, is all.”

”Either way—”

”No. Don’t blame yourself.”

”It was my suggestion we split up.”

”And it was a good one.”

”But look at where it brought us!” Rex protested.

”We can’t afford to dwell on what-ifs.” Ahsoka reasoned with him, “Rex, we made the best decision presented to us, the best decision we could have possibly made in the moment. I don’t regret it, so I can’t let you regret it either.”

Rex pursed his lips, eyes searching her own. After a quiet moment, he opened his mouth to say something more, but the sound of a descending ship reached their hearing. Ahsoka looked up from beneath the shade of the AT-TE, found the _Silver Angel_ lowering itself down but feet away. Ahsoka shielded her eyes as the engines kicked up the salt, sent it swirling. Together, Rex and Ahsoka walked to the ship as it settled down. The skiff lowered a moment later, and Trace and Rafa came bounding out.

”Ahsoka!” Trace called to her, smiling, “You’re okay!”

”Ahsoka!” Rafa fumed, face contorted in anger, “Go tell your friend you’re alive before he wakes up again! We ran out of tranqs.”

”I’m glad to see you both,” Ahsoka said once they stood before her. “Did you have any trouble?”

”Oh, trouble is an _understatement_ ,” Rafa hissed. Ahsoka looked her over, realized that her hair was slightly unkempt, her clothes a little skewed. She pointed to the _Silver Angel_ and nearly shouted, “I turned my back for a _second_ and mister hairless up there is on his feet, breaking his life support in half trying to walk around! I’m _not_ a mechanic, _certainly not_ a medic—!”

Trace interjected, trying and failing to stifle her laughter, “And she has absolutely _no_ bedside manner. Ahsoka, you should’ve seen it. I think I developed muscle in my abdomen from laughing so hard.”

“— Do you understand the kind of tricky dance I had to perform to get him back in bed, tranq him _and_ fix the oxygen mask all while he’s fighting me?” Rafa finished with a huff.

Ahsoka winced and asked, “He didn’t hurt you, did he?”

”No...” Rafa grumbled, blowing some hair that had fallen into her face out of the way. She crossed her arms and added, “Nothing too serious, anyway. He’s all dopey from the drugs.”

”He hurt her pride, mostly,” Trace quipped. Rafa shot her a glare.

”I’ll go talk to him, then.” Ahsoka said, “I can’t thank you both enough for helping me.”

”You owe us,” Rafa informed. “ _Big time_.”

”I know,” Ahsoka said, making her way toward their ship. Rex fell into step beside her and asked, “Do you need me there with you?”

”No,” Ahsoka reassured him. She paused mid-step however, reached down to her two sabers and her sword. “Take these. Keep them somewhere safe until I return.”

Rex seemed ready to protest, but Ahsoka looked at him imploringly. She wasn’t sure what her expression conveyed, but it was enough to make Rex shake his head and hold out his hands wordlessly. Ahsoka handed the items off, and he took all three before escorting Trace and Rafa toward the AT-TE. Ahsoka hobbled up the skiff, made her way down the hall and to the med-bay. When she entered, Anakin was already awake, was struggling to sit up...

”You’re impossible,” she huffed. He startled, turned sluggishly to face her. As she made her way toward him, she caught his gaze as it cut to her severed prosthetic, her right side supported by the crutch. Questions filled his eyes, filled the space between them. Ahsoka reached up with her free hand, pushed him back down on the bed. He went with little resistance, body not quite cooperating from the side-effects of the tranqs.

He managed to gain some control over his limbs however, managed to pull the mask from his face when he was lying once more and asked, in between labored breaths, “Where did you go?”

”I’m going to do a body scan.” Ahsoka informed, ignoring his question. She reached down, activated the rings that would raise up and run down the length of him. He seemed aggravated at her refusal to answer him, but held still for the scan nonetheless. When it was finished, Ahsoka turned to the x-ray hologram on the wall, saw where he’d broken two ribs...

Saw also where, from the elbows and knees down, his bones and sinew gave way to metal and wire. Ahsoka’s lips parted. Did his missing limbs have anything to do with his obviously burnt flesh? Is that why he seemed to have better control over his arm and hands, rather than his core and neck and head?

”You need a bacta tank.” Ahsoka began after a moment. She couldn’t bring herself to look away from the x-ray. “Unfortunately, it doesn’t appear Trace and Rafa have one.”

She felt Anakin’s eyes boring holes into her back. Ahsoka finally turned, met his steely gaze. She had the distinct impression that he was scowling. Though it was difficult to tell, now.

”What happened to you?” She asked him once again. He turned his gaze away. Ahsoka pressed, “Did Palpatine do this?”

Anakin took a deep, shuddering breath. The mask steamed. He shook his head, but said nothing more. Ahsoka’s lips thinned as she considered him.

”We don’t have to discuss it right now,” she relented. “But knowing what happened could help us later, in the healing process.”

Anakin turned his gaze to the ceiling. Ahsoka considered him a moment longer. The urge to ask him more questions was nearly insurmountable. There was so much she didn’t know, so much she needed to understand before she relayed the message she’d received in the world between worlds. But... it could wait. Anakin was in pain. Anakin needed treatment. There was only one place Ahsoka knew she could get it for him, without being discovered by the Empire. Only one person left in the galaxy who had the resources, who would be willing to help her.

”We’ll be leaving soon,” Ahsoka said, making her way back out of the med-bay. “Until then, please just try to rest.”

* * *

They landed the _Silver Angel_ on Alderaan by nightfall, which didn’t bode well for their cover stories of being refugees, but it was the best they could do, on such short notice. After being cleared to enter the space-port, Ahsoka threw the closest thing Trace and Rafa had to a cloak over her head — a bed sheet — and walked with them from the ship and into the port. They were greeted by stormtroopers, harried and annoyed, she sensed, at having to inspect a ship so late at night. When they approached, Ahsoka waved her hand before their helmeted faces and said,

”You don’t need to inspect this ship. Everything checks out.”

”There were a disproportionate amount of life forms that appeared on the scan,” one of them protested. “Step aside.”

”You _don’t need_ to inspect this ship.” Ahsoka pressed, harder than before. She caught the worried looks Trace and Rafa gave each other out of the corner of her eye. The stormtroopers straightened the tiniest bit, succumbing to the mind trick.

”We don’t need to inspect this ship,” one said, monotone.

”You’re right,” the other agreed. “Everything checks out.”

”Wow...” Trace muttered when the stormtroopers had turned on their heel and disappeared back into the port. “Was that what you did to the Pykes?”

”Yes,” Ahsoka replied, making her way through the port and into the streets. They’d landed in Aldera, and the vast lake before the palace stretched placidly in the distance. Ahsoka pointed to the rising, smooth spires of said palace and told the Martez sisters, “See that island? That’s where I’m headed. Don’t forget: I still have my communicator. If something goes wrong while I’m gone, don’t hesitate to contact me.”

”Ahsoka,” Trace began worriedly, stopping her before she could depart any further. “Are you sure this was a good idea? Imperials are running around everywhere. What if someone recognizes you?”

”It’s why I’m going alone to the palace,” Ahsoka informed. “If I’m caught, you all can still escape.”

”I like this plan, Trace.” Rafa grabbed her younger sister by her arm and started pulling her back into the port. “Don’t make Ahsoka overthink it.”

Trace shot Rafa a disapproving look. Ahsoka reassured her, “I’ll be fine, Trace. I’ll be back soon.”

”You better be,” Rafa ordered. “If you aren’t back here before suns up, I’m coming to hunt you down myself.”

Ahsoka disguised her smile behind the brim of her hood, nodded at the sisters before turning and stepping deeper into Aldera. She passed several patrols on her way, had to hide in the shadows as she continued on. An hour passed before she reached the palace. There was no safe entry, no way to infiltrate at the ground level without raising some kind of alarm or garnering attention. So, Ahsoka edged her way around the palace, propped her crutch behind a statue in a garden and used the Force to jump, one-legged, onto a nearby balcony. Using the baluster as a support, Ahsoka made her way to the closed glass doors, used the Force to unlatch their lock and then hopped inside. Darkness greeted her, the only light emitted that from a nearby hall. Ahsoka stepped as soundlessly through the room as she could. From what she could make out, it was one of those meeting areas the likes of which she’d seen when she’d been here with Padmé, protecting the Senator from a perceived threat that, as it would turn out, had been real.

In the hall, the coast was clear. But Ahsoka kept herself close to the shadows regardless. Palace guards had yet to make themselves known, but that didn’t mean they weren’t nearby. Ahsoka could remember the layout of the palace’s interior from her time chasing down Aurra Sing, could remember which halls to turn down and slide through. The only problem was her speed, which had slowed considerably without the aid of her crutch. More than once, Ahsoka had to pull herself up by the arms and remain, suspended across the ceiling, until a patrolling guard had passed.

In the end, she accessed Bail Organa’s office with relative ease. No guards stood at the door, so when she stepped inside, she was not expecting to find him sitting at his desk, nightclothes on, stylus in hand as he turned over pages of flimsi. She’d prepared to wait out the night, let him find her in the morning. Instead, she found him.

”Undana,” Bail began, never looking up as he continued to work. “I thought I told you, take the night off. I’m just finishing up a draft and then I’ll—”

”Senator,” Ahsoka interrupted.

Bail’s head shot up, eyes bleary but alert. Ahsoka shut the door quickly behind her, used the Force to draw the curtain to his office’s balcony shut and then leaned against the closed entrance. The viceroy sprang from his chair, rounded his desk and approached her. Ahsoka couldn’t meet him halfway, her leg severed as it was. Bail stopped short when he noticed it. His eyes went from relieved to worried within a matter of seconds.

” _Is your office bugged?_ ” She mouthed.

He shook his head and answered, plainly, “No.”

Ahsoka nodded. He offered her his hands, helped her down into the nearest arm chair, helped her to sit. He pulled a chair in front of her a second after, searched her face as he sat down atop it and asked,

”Captain Rex found you, then?”

”He did.” Ahsoka confirmed, “He’s waiting on a ship in the spaceport for me.”

”How did you make it here?” He asked.

Ahsoka sighed. That was a long story she didn’t have time to tell right now. In lieu of replying, Ahsoka waggled her fingers in explanation instead.

”I see.” Bail said, “I’m sure I needn’t tell you it’s dangerous, you being here. For many reasons.”

”I know.” Ahsoka said, “But I’ve brought... several people here. Infants, held by the Empire. They need a kind of help I can’t offer. Not by myself, anyway — not right now. I’ve also brought a deceased person. They’ll need a place of burial.”

”... Oh.” Bail said gravely, “Is there anything else I should know?”

“Yes,” Ahsoka responded, trying and failing to conceal her nervous trepidation. “Someone is very badly injured. They need medical attention somewhere discreet. The damage inflicted was... extensive. I don’t have the details.”

Bail raised a single brow and asked, “Might I ask who this someone is, for transparency’s sake?”

”A former Jedi. I was captured by the Empire, and I escaped with them,” Ahsoka said. It wasn’t wholly a lie, but it wasn’t wholly the truth, either.

It would have to suffice.

Bail’s gaze went guarded, considering — as if he’d sensed she’d concealed something. Ahsoka bit her tongue inside her mouth. She was trying to fool a politician, a man who spent a majority if not all of his day gauging the reactions and expressions of his colleagues down to their most banal, minute detail. Bail sat the tiniest bit straighter, the tiniest bit more rigid and asked,

”Are you neglecting to inform me of something?”

Ahsoka held his gaze. There was an appropriate amount of suspicion in his tone, she reminded herself. He had every right to be cautious. She’d been gone for days on end, had shown up in the middle of the night without a right leg. On top of all of that, she wasn’t being very forthcoming in asking for his help. When she took too long to respond, he continued,

“I should tell you that, as of a day ago, it was made widely known within the political arena that Palpatine had lost his most favored enforcer. In addition to that, just a few short hours ago, the holonews broadcasted the destruction of a rather large infrastructure in the Industrialized zone on Coruscant. I don’t think it was a coincidence that you showed up here following these two events.”

Ahsoka regarded him evenly, but inside of herself, she realized he held a knowledge of something she didn’t — perhaps it related to Anakin. Perhaps it did not. Either way, all pretense had been dropped.

”If I tell you, you won’t help me. And right now, I desperately need your help,” Ahsoka said quietly. She didn’t like where this conversation was going, where _she_ herself was taking it. She didn’t want to keep secrets from Bail — and, she reminded herself, this was not going to be a secret for much longer, because there was no way to keep it as such, not forever — but Bail was keeping secrets, too. From the Empire, from her. The reminder that an infant Leia slept soundly somewhere within the walls of this palace was the only reason why Ahsoka held her tongue in revealing Anakin’s identity. For his sake, for Leia’s, for Bail’s and for her own. Bail couldn’t see that, but Ahsoka had no doubt he suspected it. If not the truth exactly, then something akin to it.

”I’ll have you escorted to Polis Massa,” Bail said after a tense moment, eyes moving to her severed limb. “And I’ll meet you there as soon as the sun rises on my world.”

* * *

Bail escorted her to the gardens in hover-chair, guided her to her crutch and watched her walk into moonless night. When she was out of sight, he steered the chair back inside the palace, returned to his office and set about making preparations. He contacted Aldera’s emergency center first, made arrangements with them to retrieve the children. Next, he contacted the Palace’s undertaker, apologized for the lateness of the hour and requested them receive the body that had been escorted to the spaceport. When that was finished, he contacted Raymus Antilles, asked if he would escort Tano’s party to Polis Massa. Raymus agreed without a moment of hesitation, assured discretion.

Finally, Bail closed the doors to his balcony, double checked that the shudders were drawn and then shut off every light. He activated the holo-pedestal that sat in the corner of his study, waited with bated breath as it hailed his desired contact. He hadn’t used this frequency since establishing it. As the line idled, waiting to be revived, Bail remembered — he hadn’t used it at all. Ever. There’d never been reason to, before. The one who existed on the other side of the line and he had both agreed never to make contact, unless under the most dire of circumstances.

 _Well_ , Bail conceded to himself, _this was most definitely dire_.

“Ben,” he said when the holographic finally transmitted, Obi-Wan Kenobi’s small, blue figure blipping to life before his eyes. “There’s been a complication. Current matters require your precedence.”

Obi-Wan Kenobi leaned forward, form flickering across star systems as he asked, grave, “What’s happened?” 

”Travel to Polis Massa.” Bail instructed, “And you will soon find out.”


	23. Respite

Ahsoka stood before the x-ray once more, expanding the holographic and focusing on the disparate damages. Besides Anakin’s broken ribs and his new limbs, his lungs and vocal cords were charred. The skin itself was beyond repair, it seemed. He’d burnt it down to the hair follicle. Likely the nerve endings, too.

Ahsoka took a step back, wanting to look at the whole of the holo again. Her foot caught on something when she moved, made her slip...

... a familiar presence engulfed her, suspended her mid-plummet. Ahsoka blinked, stared at the floor she’d almost hit with wide eyes. Her body moved again after a moment, this time up, rather than down. Righted by the hand of her sudden savior, Ahsoka positioned her crutch back into its correct position. Only when she’d found her balance again did Anakin release her.

She turned her head over her shoulder, found him lowering his arm back to his side. He looked not at her, but at the ground. Ahsoka followed his gaze, discovered he stared at the item she’d tripped upon: his helmet’s discarded face plate. Slowly she bent, retrieved it, inspected it. Needles protruded from the inside, too long to not have penetrated his flesh. Ahsoka grimaced at the thought, wondered, _did you even feel it?_

”We’re headed to a medical center in the outer rim,” she began after another moment. She set his face plate down on a nearby table and approached his side, met and held his gaze. “You’ll be treated there. Please don’t make things difficult.”

Anakin’s curiosity, and wariness, spiked.

”I only want to help you,” she tried to reassure. His incredulity and disbelief permeated the room like a foul stench. Ahsoka shook her head, dismayed by his reaction. What made him think she lied?

”I don’t know what happened to you,” Ahsoka started, voice hardening with her every word. “I don’t know why you turned into this. But if you can believe in anything now, you can believe in me. I stayed for you. I handled everything you threw at me. _For you_. I shouldn’t have forgiven you for anything — in fact, I almost regret it. Because I suspect I know what you’ve done. But you were my Master. My _brother_. My _best friend_. And I _waited_ for you. I’m _still_ waiting for you. I believe in you, Anakin. _Please_ , believe in me, too.”

Anakin blinked up at her. His still blue eyes were unreadable, framed by his seared face. Ahsoka felt such a sharp, visceral pity for him, then. He seemed to recognize it, if the way his brow line dipped was any indication. He scorned her with simple look — she suspected she’d done the same to him, too. But one look was all it had taken. She couldn’t believe it. Suddenly, Ahsoka was angry. Finally, he’d done it — he’d made her angry.

”I don’t understand...” She asked, “What happened? What made you this way?”

Minutely, Anakin’s expression shifted. He reached for the life support, pulled it slowly from his face and let it come to rest beneath his chin. He struggled to breathe as he gathered his words. When he responded, it was to say, hoarse and strained and weak,

”I had a vision.”

Ahsoka stilled.

Shakily he explained, “Padmé was... she was going to die in childbirth.”

Ahsoka’s entire body did something then — went hot and cold all at once. She’d known. She’d always known. So why did it startle her, to hear him reveal that secret in only words that hinted? Because it was a topic they never would’ve breached, she knew. It wasn’t something Anakin would have maybe ever revealed to her. It was, and would have perhaps always been, a secret. Anakin and Padmé had been content to keep it that way — and she would have been content, too. Because they were her friends, because they were happy, because... what harm could it do, really?

That’s what she’d thought, anyway.

Anakin readjusted the mask over his face, took a few lungfuls of air before pulling it away again and continuing, confirming her suspicions,

”I couldn’t stop it. I knew it. I couldn’t stop my mother from dying, and I wouldn’t be able to prevent Padmé from dying. Not without becoming more powerful. Palpatine... offered me a solution. He revealed himself to me, told me he could save her. All I had to do was...”

He screwed his eyes shut.

”Ahsoka,” Anakin whispered brokenly, a single tear slipping free of his eye and cascading slowly down the length of his temple. His throat bobbed when he asked, anguished, “What have I done?”

* * *

“Are you hungry?”

Ahsoka perked up, the smell of warm food wafting her way. She peered from around the arm of the chair she’d curled herself into like a tooka and nodded eagerly, if tiredly. Rex entered the hull that she’d secluded herself away in with bowl in hand, deposited it gently in her waiting palms. Ahsoka sipped slowly at the broth that resided inside, not wanting to upset her stomach after so long going without food. Rex grabbed a nearby crate and propped himself down across from her as she ate.

”How’s the General?” Rex asked after she’d downed half the bowl.

Ahsoka paused.

”I saw him,” Rex explained quietly. “When I went looking for you. He’s...”

Ahsoka set the bowl down in her lap, inhaled and wondered how to phrase it.

”It’s not just his right arm anymore, Rex,” she settled on. “It’s his left arm, and both his legs above the knee as well. His skin is... you saw it. It’s damaged.”

”Do you know why?”

”He won’t say,” Ahsoka shook her head. “But Barriss mentioned to me that the Temple caught fire, the night of Order 66. Maybe he couldn’t escape it in time.”

Rex sighed. Noting she’d stopped eating, he nodded for her to continue. Ahsoka did so, not wanting to be rude. But she’d lost her appetite.

”Captain Antilles says we’ll be arriving in under an hour.” Rex ventured after she’d finished her meal.

”Then I should wake Barriss,” Ahsoka said. Trace and Rafa had retired as soon as they’d entered hyperspace, Barriss right behind them. Cody, presumably, was still looking through ID9’s archival footage. She suspected Rex knew where to find him.

Rex took her now emptied bowl and offered her a hand. She took it, and he pulled her to an upright position, held on until she found her balance. Ahsoka gabbed her crutch and started for the door.

* * *

When the doctors took Anakin, he went willingly. Ahsoka suspected he was in too much pain to do much else. In the Force, he felt... tired, wary, nervous. The advent of those feelings was unusual and unsettling. Even stranger than him feeling them was that he did not try to conceal that he was feeling them. If he’d been anyone else, Ahsoka would have surmised that he wasn’t aware of his projecting. But this was Anakin, careful to the last with what he allowed her to perceive about him. She suspected in the past that he’d always been that way with her so that if there was ever a reason to be anxious, it wasn’t because of him. But now, looking at him in such a vulnerable state...

She understood he was, once more, terrified. The life he’d created for himself, for all of them, had left him with too many uncertainties. Like her in the beginning of the aftermath, he didn’t know what to do, where to go, what was safe.

“I’ll watch over you,” she promised him. “It’s going to be okay.”

He only looked at her, saying nothing. Rex was nearby, and she felt how overwhelmed it made them both to be in each other’s presence again, knowing what they knew — or suspected they knew, in Anakin’s case — about the other.

* * *

Later, when they’d removed his cybernetics and deposited him in the bacta, Ahsoka was approached by a doctor droid inquiring about her leg.

”We are to attach you with a new enhancement,” they informed.

Ahsoka turned to Rex. He’d been by her side since they’d touched down upon the planetoid. Barriss was somewhere else in the facility being treated for malnourishment. Cody was finally resting and Trace and Rafa were hopefully still doing the same. One look, and he seemed to understand what she asked with her eyes, rather than her words.

”I’ll keep an eye on him,” he assured.

”Thank you,” Ahsoka responded. She nodded at the doctor droid, whose assistant approached her with hover chair. Rex took the crutch as she was led away down several halls. Eventually, they came upon the room of operation. The door parted, they moved her inside...

... and she came face to face with one she’d never allowed herself the hope of seeing ever again.

” _Obi-Wan?_ ” Ahsoka asked, voice hardly there. She almost rose to stand. Obi-Wan reached for her before she could, kept her sitting by placing gentle hands atop her shoulders. She gaped up at him, hardly believing her eyes. Ahsoka blinked just to be sure he was truly there.

He was.

”Young one...” Obi-Wan began, the sound of his voice shocking her out of her stupor. She’d never thought she’d see him again, let alone hear him speak. She was horrified to acknowledge she’d almost forgotten the lilt of his speech, the soft way he spoke with her, always. Ahsoka reached up to touch him, hands seeking his arms. She gripped his sleeves covered in grit. He took her in and she in turn did the same to him, leaving no part of his visage unchecked. Heavy bags framed his once mirthful eyes. Streaks of white decorated his temples, his beard and mustache. His once fair skin was weathered, burnt — as if he’d spent too long under one or more suns. When his eyes found her severed leg, they briefly closed. He sighed and murmured,

”There is much to discuss, it would seem.”


	24. Regret pt. I

_Anakin’s room was untouched. Obi-Wan could not place why that fact filled him more with dread than relief._

_Master Yoda said nothing as he stepped into his former apprentice’s room, only looked on with worried, wearied expression. Obi-Wan went to the bed, reached below and pulled out the small, flat chest Anakin had kept since... well, since a year ago. Inside was only one item — a small pouch that housed something very dear._

_”Kept them, he did?” Yoda asked solemnly. Obi-Wan dangled Ahsoka’s padawan beads before him, turning them over to inspect them. They were pristine as the day she’d arrived. Anakin had spent considerable time caring for them, just as he had the child’s lightsabers. The thought of her bore a horrible, wrenching grief._

_There was high chance Ahsoka had not survived — this was likely all he had left of the padawan they’d failed._

_”Anakin had hoped...” Obi-Wan murmured thickly, placing the braid back into the pouch and pocketing it within his belt pocket, “Anakin had hoped, as I had, that Ahsoka would one day return.”_

* * *

“I’ve logged everything I thought could help us,” Cody explained later, after Ahsoka’s fitting and their long, overdue conversation had taken place. They’d emerged from the operating room to find the Commander and Captain waiting for them, ID9 hovering nearby. Cody was shocked, speechless, and soon shaking at the sight of Obi-Wan. He’d stood too fast, grappled. His mouth moved but no words sounded. Obi-Wan laid a palm over his shoulder, conveyed his forgiveness through touch and expression and the Force. It was enough. It had to be.

They had work to do.

”There are several recordings, but out of everything, I thought these were most pertinent,” Cody continued, starting the holo. An image flickered to life. Obi-Wan recognized Ahsoka running forward...

... and Sith lightning shooting through her back.

The concerned look Rex shot his former Commander did not go unnoticed. Ahsoka watched the events she’d suffered relay without expression. They cycled back to the beginning at the end, playing again and again until...

”Incriminating evidence.” Rex intoned, dismayed, “This is what Yocinee meant.”

”She gave us proof,” Cody agreed. “A way to tell the galaxy.”

”Sidious is hooded in this.” Ahsoka reminded them grimly, “Without a clear view of his face, we have nothing.”

”It is still _better_ than nothing.” Obi-Wan assured them. Ahsoka crossed her arms, refused to look his way when he spoke. Obi-Wan studied her a moment. Rex and Cody looked between them worriedly. They’d read the room, recognized the former Jedi’s tense behavior. Obi-Wan turned to Cody after a moment and asked, “What else did you find?”

”This,” Cody responded. He shot Ahsoka an apologetic glance and said, “Sorry, Commander.”

With that, Cody started the holo once more. The new image flickered up, and it was not a pleasant one. Obi-Wan did not realize he’d grabbed the edge of the table they were seated around until his fingers slipped across its top. He sucked in a sharp breath as the recorded scene played out before him.

Ahsoka, fighting for her life against what Anakin had become.

In the operating room, she’d refused to tell him what had happened — but seeing the droid ID9’s archival footage playing out in real time spoke for her. Vader’s blade locked with her own, sparking and screeching, twisted and tore through her flesh and bone...

Obi-Wan had witnessed many horrific things in his life — he’d watched his Master die before his very eyes; he’d watched Maul kill innocent villagers, all to get his attentions; he’d watched Anakin murder their children, the explanation and reason for such violence lost; he’d watched Anakin burn on the bank of a river of lava and Obi-Wan’s heart, hardly able to take it, had turned to stone as he’d turned away — but it still was a fresh split in his soul, every time he witnessed a tragedy. One would think he’d become desensitized. But he had not.

He had not.

Rex, he noted — despite looking aggrieved and angered — did not appear surprised. Perhaps Ahsoka had been more forthcoming with him, at an earlier time. In the holo, all was silent. Ahsoka fell. Obi-Wan’s mouth flattened into a thin, tight line. His posture went rigid. Words escaped him, but feelings abounded.

”He could have killed me,” Ahsoka began quietly. Obi-Wan looked away from the image of Ahsoka on the holo to the image of Ahsoka before him, finally looking at him through the holo, finally meeting his gaze. Her own expression was hard and emotionless. “But he didn’t.”

”Oh, Ahsoka...” Obi-Wan murmured. Her experiences as a captive had changed her. 

She held his gaze, uncompromising until the holo flickered yet again. She returned her attention to the events unfolding between them, watched with gradually widening eyes as her holo-form, still sprawled across the floor, finally fell unconscious. Vader, bending down, extending his arm...

... fingers just barely grazing her own.

And then his arms slipped swiftly beneath her, lifted her up, carried her off to someplace unseen.

* * *

_Beru rode in on third rotation since his arrival, Luke strapped to her front and a vaporator strapped to her Eopie’s side. Obi-Wan helped her dismount, and before he could so much bestow her proper greeting, she had deposited Luke into his arms and set to work unloading all that she’d brought: canned preserves, meat slabs in cooking container, mushrooms and dried herbs, little viles of spices and elixirs._

_”This is too much,” he tried to reason, embarrassed and grateful all at once at her hospitality. He rocked Luke gently in his arms as she worked to bury the vaporator’s spike into the sand beside his homestead._

_”Don’t be ridiculous,” Beru admonished lightly. “You’re an enemy of the Empire. I’m not naive enough to think they’ll leave this backwater alone for long. You won’t be able to work, not in any of the nearby towns or cities, anyway. You’ll work for me — you’ll watch over us.”_

_She gestured at Luke with her head, went back to her task._

_Obi-Wan frowned, puzzling that over, and said,_

_”That’s very gracious of you. But I had plans to do that regardless of compensation.”_

_”One could hardly watch over a family without food on their table, or water on their tongue,” Beru reminded. She gave the vaporator one last final shove, and it stuck. Sighing with satisfaction, Beru stepped back from her handiwork and smirked. As she surveyed the expanse of the Jundland Wastes beyond, however, her smirk faded. She turned to face him, maneuvered her arms. Obi-Wan returned Luke, and she cooed softly at him. He reached up little hand toward her face..._

_The weight of Ahsoka’s padawan beads burned heavily in Obi-Wan’s pocket._

_”Owen is not fond of you,” Beru told him. They moved into his homestead, an abandoned, single bedroom that Beru had alerted him to, on that first day. “He doesn’t like my being here. He doesn’t like my doing much of anything, really.”_

_Obi-Wan remembered then the engraving of the white sun he’d spotted as he’d passed through Mos Espa on his second day, the one inscribed above not just one door, but several others. When he’d inquired about the mark to a local, they’d informed him that the occupants of the homes had all disappeared — and that every home with a white sun inscribed over the doorway shared one thing in common._

_They’d all been the homes of slaves._

_”He’d rather you be careful,” Obi-Wan surmised. “If you were to make an enemy of the Hutts, they would be the last enemy you ever made.”_

_”Whitesun is not a common name.” Beru informed, eyeing him carefully. “I’m but a simple farmer’s wife.”_

_”So you say,” Obi-Wan smiled._

_“I should be going.” Beru said a moment later, watching the twins suns begin their slow descent down the horizon. Obi-Wan helped her with the sling and with mounting Eopie’s back. Before she turned to depart, she looked down at Obi-Wan and said, cradling Luke to her chest,_

_”Thank you for this blessing, amidst a curse.”_

* * *

“There is the question now of how to proceed,” Bail Organa informed over hologram communication. Obi-Wan had contacted him shortly after his meeting with Rex, Cody and Ahsoka. He’d informed the viceroy over all he’d gathered and witnessed, confirming their worst fear — Vader was indeed the one Ahsoka had brought to Polis Massa. He was being treated somewhere within the facility.

”Have you seen him?” Bail asked. He was dressed in the travel attire, on his quick way to convene.

”No,” Obi-Wan responded heavily. “Ahsoka will not say where he is. I believe she doesn’t want me near him, after what I told her. She’s... upset.”

”Are you safe, at least? Should I bring backup?”

”I don’t believe that will be necessary,” Obi-Wan shook his head. “Ahsoka is under the impression that Vader has changed.”

”Do you believe this is so?” Bail asked, skeptical. 

Obi-Wan had parceled over it, but he had not yet had time to meditate on the matter. He knew things to not be so simple, however. Much was unclear.

”I acknowledge that her feelings have clouded her judgement,” Obi-Wan relented. “But she believes what she claims.”

”... Send me the footage.” Bail instructed, bone tired but determined, “I’ll have my intelligence operatives leak it and we’ll go from there, see how the public responds.”

”If you do this,” Obi-Wan warned him, “no matter if it succeeds or fails — you’ll never be able to go back to your role as Senator. The Emperor will start an inquisition.”

”Then we will start a Rebellion.” Bail responded, voice full of conviction and hope. Obi-Wan admired his spirit, the gleam of not yet achieved victory in his eyes, prayed beyond measure that it wasn’t misplaced.

”We’ll see each other again soon, my friend,” Obi-Wan said, and the communication fizzled out.

* * *

_There was a moment he spent alone in the Dune Sea, having stumbled there as if he were half drunk, or half mad. The night was endless and the stars brilliant. He’d fallen to his knees there in the abyss and wept, his tears streaming down his sand covered face. He howled into the wind like a creature of the night. This was not the existence he imagined. This was not the life he’d ever thought possible. His people were gone, wiped from existence by the hands and the blade of the boy he’d raised and loved and left to die._

_”I can’t take this,” he sobbed at the sky._

_And yet he continued to endure it anyway._

* * *

“Ahsoka,” he said gravely, catching her alone in the hall, “I need to see him.”

She whirled on him, viscous, indignant rage in her eyes and in her posture.

”You left him to _die_ ,” Ahsoka hissed. “You put Padmé’s life in jeopardy when you followed her. You approached him with all the hostility you had — and you wonder why you weren’t enough to bring him back.”

”Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan tried to reason, reminding her of what they’d discussed as the doctors had attached her with new leg, “I watched him _kill_ —”

” _Don’t,”_ she commanded, eyes watering. “I don’t need to hear it again.”

”Ahsoka,” he tried once more, reaching out to her. She didn’t move away when his palms came to settle down atop her trembling shoulders, nor did she tense. Instead, she slumped down, fell into his simple embrace. He spoke, serious, “Senator Organa is on his way here. I _must_ see Anakin before he arrives.”

”Not if you’re going to kill him,” Ahsoka shook her head furiously, and her tears spilled. She’d become so wise in such short years, but in that moment, all Obi-Wan could see was the wide-eyed child who’d arrived to meet them on Christophosis what seemed so long ago. Despite everything, she was still so young.

”I only want to see him,” Obi-Wan assured softly. Bile rose high in his throat — he feared whatever he might find. He’d left Anakin to die. He’d let him burn. He’d be scarred beyond a possibility Obi-Wan could dare perceive. If the fire within him had not extinguished, it could very well consume the entire facility. Having Ahsoka there was the only chance Obi-Wan had. She might temper whatever terrible reaction he was certain would ensue.

For it would be terrible — Obi-Wan had no doubt of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t believe this fic has reached over 10,000 hits. Thank you so much!!!!!!!
> 
> (Beru and Obi-Wan’s discussion is a reference to EK Johnston’s Queen’s Shadow — it was implied in the novel that Beru led an abolitionist movement on Tatooine. One of the doors mentioned with the symbol of the whitesun inscribed above it was the former home of the Skywalkers.)


	25. Regret pt. II

The new leg was lighter, easier to maneuver. She stood and never swayed, never faltered. Receptors laid on the surface of the near white metal, giving her the sensation of touch.

Ahsoka walked now with both feet, leading Obi-Wan through the facility, feeling every time her new foot connected with the floor. The sensation was strange — not quite what it had been before, but something that she’d been so used to, hadn’t realized she’d taken for granted until it was gone. As they traversed, she followed Anakin’s feelings as Obi-Wan followed her, allowed them lead them both to the desired room. Ahsoka grappled for the briefest moment before she strengthened her resolve, turned to Obi-Wan and said,

”Give me your lightsaber.”

Obi-Wan frowned only slightly, the expression subtle enough to almost go unnoticed. But Ahsoka was cautious of everything now — including him. _Especially_ him. Slowly did he reach down and unclip his weapon. He deposited it into her waiting palm.

A moment later, Ahsoka accessed the door. She stepped into the room, found that the doctors had already removed Anakin from the bacta. He was laid out across a hover-stretcher, restraints hooked over his biceps and thighs, across his middle. Their was a tense air about him, as if he’d sensed, long before they’d entered, who was present.

Ahsoka stiffened as he craned his neck to face them. Her thumb moved to hover just above the lightsaber’s activator. Anakin’s gaze briefly locked with her own before sliding past, fixing on the one behind her. For one ephemeral moment, the galaxy was still — as if all life and planets and ships had stopped in their motions to witness the scene unfolding in that very room...

And then seething hatred emanated. Anakin’s body went taught across the stretcher. Ahsoka was glad for the restraints, suddenly. She watched, alarmed, as his eyes flickered between them with unmistakable, furious outrage. The oxygen mask sitting against the lower half of his face began to steam from his now short, rapid breaths. A machine attached to his chest, monitoring his heartbeat, began beeping incessantly in warning. Ahsoka’s eyes flickered to the line across the monitor, watched as it plunged and ascended in rapid succession.

”You planned this all along. You’re going to kill me,” Anakin accused, voice slightly muffled but unmistakably guttural. Betrayal in his eyes, he continued, low and enraged, “You turned against me!”

As if it were that simple, in this situation. His declaration was enough to almost set off her anger — if anyone had turned against anyone, it was him — but Ahsoka only sighed, gave no further reaction. Her being, unlike the rest of the universe, didn’t plunge immediately back into motion. Anakin’s response had not startled her — she’d already suffered her galaxy-shattering moment in the form of an expulsion several horrendous steps behind her. She supposed that was why she was one of the only survivors of Anakin’s misdeeds; her life experiences had equipped her for them.

”No, I didn’t,” she responded. She felt Obi-Wan shift nervously behind her, felt the way he kept a cautious distance even as she threw every last of them to the wastes and approached. Anakin’s gaze sharpened, flashed in warning, but Ahsoka didn’t heed it. He was weak and, deep down, she felt he held more fear than real contempt or malice. He recognized the situation he was in — his life balanced on a precipice. To assuage him, she explained, calmly but bitingly,

”And if I’d wanted you dead, I would have already killed you.”

This did not appease him, but it brought a faltering. Still, Anakin fumed — his breath came too quick, vapor fogging the oxygen mask. His accelerating heart rate had finally alerted two droids. They emerged from a side room, one muttering encouragements to find calm in their language, the other one attempting to usher the detriments that had set their patient off, out. Ahsoka didn’t budge, nor did Obi-Wan.

The two men stared at one another, decidedly different emotions in their gazes.

”I’m not your enemy, Anakin,” Obi-Wan said, so sadly, so pained. Ahsoka wondered if that was what he’d wished he’d said, if that was how he’d longed to rewrite their fateful encounter. Perhaps he’d spent countless days and nights on Tatooine, nothing else but to remember those final moments together, wondering what he could have done differently, what he could have said instead. The thought filled her with forlorn. She’d lashed out too quickly, too harshly. She’d judged him for his actions, hadn’t considered what her own course of actions would be, had she been in his position. Would she have made a better choice? Unlikely — not if she’d been faced in the moment with what Obi-Wan had. She knew to be confronted with the knowledge of Anakin’s turn — fresh as Obi-Wan had been, and without explanation as to _why_ — it would have broken her last, most sacred truth about the galaxy; that Anakin Skywalker, the last person she’d ever believed in and the last person who’d ever believed in her, was truly gone.

“I was never your enemy,” Obi-Wan continued solemnly. He took a step forward, and Anakin tensed further, every muscle left of him tightening. Ahsoka felt the Force give quick, sharp warning...

”I’ll kill you,” Anakin spit. His eyes did something horrific then — turned that monstrous, molten gold ringed in red. Ahsoka took a bracing step forward. Obi-Wan’s already crestfallen face fell further. Anakin seethed, “I’ll kill you for what you did to me, old man.”

Ahsoka’s hands curled into fists. Her knuckles whitened across the hilt of Obi-Wan’s lightsaber. Before she knew it, she had the weapon pointed at Anakin, right in his face as she growled, terse and angry,

” _We are all on the same side!_ ”

Silence.

Unsteadily she continued, ”What Obi-Wan did to you is the _least_ of what you deserve.”

Anakin’s eyes were still that terrible sheen, but now they sat round with shock in his face as he regarded her. The doctor droids grew agitated, started physically pushing at her person. She broke Anakin’s gaze first, turned on her heel and marched from the room. Obi-Wan followed shortly behind, rubbed his hand down his face and slumped onto a nearby bench. Ahsoka considered him for a moment before she offered him back his lightsaber.

”That went... better than I’d hoped,” he said, accepting it back. Ahsoka stood, watching him as he cradled the hilt in his hands, and then sat gingerly down beside him.

”What happens now?” She asked him quietly. She stared hard at the floor, unable to deny the pounding of her heart as she waited for Obi-Wan to respond. Her course of action now depended entirely upon his — and she wasn’t sure what she would do, yet. Act with him, or against him? She could not ignore any longer the horrors that her former Master had committed. One righteous act could not right a million wrongs.

But her mind was an edifice, no one of its beliefs as resolute as before. Her heart whispered the words Shmi had spoken to her — _stay on this course, and you will succeed_ — and suffering, fresher and riper than before, surfaced anew.

”That is a question better left to ask Anakin, I think,” Obi-Wan responded. She realized too late that he had suffered — _was_ suffering — the same as her. What must it have taken to do what he’d done? What parts of himself had he left behind, to leave Anakin the way he did? Suddenly, his not responding to her prodding in the Force after the events of Order 66 made sense: he’d died. He’d died during the purge. He’d died right there beside Anakin Skywalker. He was not the same.

None of them were.

“For better or worse...” Obi-Wan continued, voice the gravest chill that she’d ever heard reverberate through his being, “The answer to that question depends entirely upon him.”

* * *

She ran laps in the physical therapy track room. The doctors tested the servos and mechanics of her new prosthetic every few minutes, making minor adjustments as they went. Ahsoka worked until she sweat, didn’t stop or stumble even once. When the doctors were satisfied with the results, they called it time. Ahsoka ignored them, didn’t even hear them. Thoughts rushed through her head, all that had transpired and been revealed. Anakin had been the one who’d lead the assault on the Temple, the one who’d... all those children...

As she raced around the room, these thoughts were the ones that raced around her mind. Suddenly, it was hard to breathe, hard to eradicate all the things her mind imagined. She kept going regardless, unaware that the doctors had summoned another body until it nearly collided with her own.

”Rex,” Ahsoka huffed, winded. He’d shot out an arm to stop her, to pull her off the track and to the side of the room.

”Don’t expend your energy all in one place, kid.” He said, line forming on the skin between his brows. Ahsoka frowned, braced her hands on her knees and hunched over and heaved. Bile rose up her throat before she could stop it, and then everything in her stomach was on the floor between them. Rex moved around her, kneeled beside her until the sick had passed.

”Ahsoka,” he urged, sliding her backwards. “What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

”No,” she grimaced. She clutched her head. Rex took her free arm, helped her slowly to rise back to her feet. The doctors swarmed them, making noises that sounded distressed and concerned. Before Ahsoka knew it, they had her out of the room, sitting across a med-bed and checking her for every ailment known to the galaxy. Ahsoka let them work in silence, one part of her concerned they might actually find something and another part of her already knowing they wouldn’t. When they’d made sense of her body’s reaction, they’d explained it, but Ahsoka only half listened, still too distracted; she didn’t catch much until the tail end, when Obi-Wan and Bail Organa walked into the room at the same time.

”... high levels of anxiety and stress, such as you experienced, can induce vomiting. We recommend talking to a specialist, reducing the risk of experiencing these symptoms, or taking medication.”

”Are you well?” Bail asked, concerned. Ahsoka slipped down from the bed and said,

”I will be. Any progress on the footage’s front?”

* * *

Kaeden sat alone in her and Miara’s new apartment, entire body cold and numb. She’d turned the cleaning droids on, helped them around the rooms as the holonews played in the background. It was a new luxury — most things on Alderaan were. And it kept her informed, allowed her better learn about the galaxy around her. But most of it was propaganda for the Empire, she had quickly come to discover. And so she was learning how to differentiate between what she wanted to know versus what the Empire wanted her to know. Miara was better at differentiating, she begrudgingly admitted, which meant that there was the possibility that what she’d just witnessed — what had snagged her attention and had her abandoning her task — might not have even been real. It couldn’t be. Because that was—

The door to the apartment _swished_ open. Miara came bounding up the short stairs and shouted, breathless, “Kaeden! Did you see the holonews?”

”Yeah...” Kaeden muttered, looking up just in time to see her sister hurry into the living room. She pulled out her datapad, grabbed Kaeden by her wrist and plopped them both down on the sitter. Her hands deftly moved across the screen, called up the video — the same one Kaeden had just watched but minutes ago on the holo — and played it for them both to see.

Ahsoka, getting electrocuted by a cloaked figure. Ahsoka, and that monster who’d taken Kaeden, who’d killed her friends...

That monster, taking Ahsoka’s _leg_.

”So this was real?” Kaeden murmured, horrified. She clamped a hand down over her mouth, afraid she might vomit. Miara stopped the video, nodded shakily her confirmation...

Kaeden did vomit then, ran to the ‘fresher and puked the day’s meal into the vacc tube. Miara was by her side seconds later, rubbing a shaking hand up and down her back. She presented her with a glass of water, once the sick had subsided. Kaeden took it gratefully, sipped slowly and grimaced...

”What if she died?” Kaeden asked, mostly to herself. “What if that thing killed her?”

”She passed out,” Miara attempted to reassure, but her voice lacked conviction. She had nothing to go on but what was evidenced in the holo, could only make assumptions. “And that... that creature carried her away. Based on everything we know and saw, that’s... _abnormal_ behavior. But maybe not for her. Remember that I saw them reach for her arm? Maybe she’s an exception to their rules... whatever they are.”

”It took her leg, Miara!” Kaeden shouted, “Who’s to say it didn’t take her life as well?”

”Don’t yell at me,” Miara gasped, tears springing to the surface of her eyes. They dripped down her cheeks and onto their knees. “I’m just as scared for her as you.”

Kaeden reached for her sister, and Miara reached back in turn. They held one another like that on the floor, trembling and terrified, until their breath and their pulse had synchronized into a calmer current. Miara didn’t retire to her room that night, instead scooting in close beside Kaeden in Kaeden’s bed, relying on the familiarity of the world they’d once known. They’d shared everything growing up — including sleeping space. In the days since leaving Raada, Kaeden found it had been more difficult to enter sleep without her sister by her side. Miara must have felt the same, for her sister was the one who instigated the return to the previous.

”I hope Rex finds her,” Miara whispered. She was drowsy, on the verge of succumbing to the days exhaustion. She closed her eyes, let her head sink fully into the pillow.

Kaeden said nothing, not wanting to rouse her sister from slumber. She turned on her side, stared at the wall on the opposite side of her room and couldn’t help but wonder, disheartened,

_Will he find her? And if he does, will she still be her?_


	26. Rebellion pt. I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apologizing in advance — to all I’d claimed Kaeden and Miara would not be reuniting with Ahsoka until much later, well... as it would turn out, I’d lied (partially, anyway) ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> but on the bright side, we get angst EARLY mwahaha
> 
> \+ updated the last part of this chapter in a MAJOR way because I keep forgetting what characters know/don’t know so sorry about that, if you read before it was fixed

“The Empire, of course, is claiming the footage was doctored,” Bail explained to them, “but enough have drawn conclusions exactly where we’d hoped — that the Emperor is Force sensitive, that his position could be directly tied to the power he displayed against you, Ahsoka.”

Ahsoka considered that. It hadn’t dawned on her, how central she’d be to the plot they had devised. How would the public paint her? The hapless victim? The rogue warrior of darkness? Would anyone remember her from the trial two years prior? If they did, would it change their perceptions of the footage? There were too many scenarios in which Sidious could claim the footage in such a way, Ahsoka knew, that she would end up the villain — perhaps, and most realistically, as a traitorous Jedi they’d apprehended, one who’d attempted to escape to incite chaos, murder what was left of the Senate and the Emperor himself...

That was, if Sidious had not already clearly panicked and written the recording off as a fake. What existed on its own was very implicating as was, but if most would understand their conversation, the weight and gravity of it? That remained to be seen. Certainly, explanations would be in demand. That was all Ahsoka could hope for.

“He’s building his own pyre,” Ahsoka said. She shook her head regretfully and continued, “But he still has all the power. Let’s not lose this momentum. We need to strike... something big enough to send him a message, something that he’ll have to see to personally. It’s the only way to draw him out.”

“Coruscant is too risky,” Obi-Wan warned. “And we don’t have the numbers enough to mount an operation that large.”

”But we can make numbers,” Bail implored. “I just need a bit of time to get into contact with our allies.”

”I’m not talking about Coruscant,” Ahsoka cut in. Both men blinked at her. She continued,

”You’re right, Obi-Wan. Coruscant would be too risky. I was talking about Nur. Sezja Yocinee mentioned it to me right before she died. She said it’s where they take Jedi, where they torture them until they’re corrupted.”

Bail’s gaze turned quizzical, concerned; Obi-Wan’s critical, yet despairing. They briefly consulted with one another through eye contact, the look Obi-Wan gave Bail an assurance that he would explain all Ahsoka had divulged at a later time. With that out of the way, Bail faced her once more to say,

”We’ll investigate all we can about Nur immediately.”

Bail and Obi-Wan stood then, bowed their heads in brief goodbye. Ahsoka and Rex did the same, but lingered a moment longer in the room. Silence descended, a moment enough for the both of them to collect their thoughts. Ahsoka met Rex’s gaze after too long of trying to avoid it. She found him already watching her, concernment clear in the edges of him. She did not want to discuss the things that made her hurt anymore, braced herself for them regardless. If Rex wanted to clear it away now, then—

“I miss my hair,” he blurted. Caught off guard, Ahsoka gaped. He smiled slightly at her reaction, and Ahsoka understood...

This was him offering her a way out.

“I miss my old clothes,” she replied, gesturing to the stinky, Imperial-embedded suit she’d been wearing for the past several days.

“You think this planetoid manufactures any dye?” Rex asked, raising a single brow. The corner of his mouth lifted up in a quiet smirk. Ahsoka snorted, despite herself.

Of all the things to concern themselves with in their situation... and they chose the most banal, vain ones. It was an obvious deflection, of course. But some of the weight on Ahsoka’s shoulders lifted in response. This was the desired result, it seemed, for Rex smiled fondly as she shook her head in amused disbelief. He found it in himself to chuckle in turn. As their laughter faded, Ahsoka made up her mind about a split-second decision, offered him her hand and led him into the hall and toward a supply closet when he took it.

”What are you—” he began, but cut himself off when he saw what she’d reached for on the supply shelf.

” _Shh_ ,” she sounded, winking. “I don’t think they’ll miss just one.”

 _Just one_ in question was a container of cleaning agent, the kind specifically for white surfaces. She knew it wouldn’t give him the results he’d gotten during the war, but it was as good a place as any to start again.

Minutes later found Rex sitting patiently atop a crate in the supply room, stretcher-wrap wound around his chest as Ahsoka ran her now gloved fingers lathered in the cleanser through his curls. Rex cleared his throat as she worked, began almost _teasingly,_ if she weren’t mistaken,

“So... I met a friend of yours when I went looking for you. Two friends, actually. Though I’m thinking one of them might be something more. Their names were Miara and Kaeden La— _ow!_ Ow, ow, Ahsoka— my hair. _My hair,_ Ahsoka, _ow_ —”

Ahsoka released the grip she’d taken on his short locks in her shock, muttered a quick apology before she asked, hurriedly, “You met them? Are they okay?”

”They are,” Rex confirmed, wincing as he’d rubbed the spot where she’d pulled at his scalp in her surprise. Regretfully he continued, “Miara saw what happened to you, though, on Raada. She and Kaeden thought—”

”I have to contact them,” Ahsoka interrupted in a rush. She shucked off the gloves into a waste bin and asked in her haste, “Where did you meet them? Alderaan?”

”Yes...” Rex watched her rapid movements with mild alarm, mild amusement. He stood a second later, expression taking on a more serious tone. Before she could break for the door, he intercepted her and said very softly,

”Ahsoka, there’s high chance they’ve seen the footage.”

That gave her pause, had her hesitating. Rex looked a ridiculous sight, hair full of suds and cling still wrapped around his neck and shoulders. Ahsoka might have laughed at the image he presented if she weren’t suddenly dreading the conversation that would inevitably ensue between the Larte sisters and herself. They’d be worried, and she’d be worried, and would they understand?

”I have to be honest with them,” Ahsoka realized, closing her eyes.

”They’re involved,” Rex affirmed, regret-tinged. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know how else to find you.”

”It’s not your fault,” Ahsoka reminded him. She took a shuddering breath before she nudged him back down atop the crate. “Sit. Let’s finish your hair before we find Bail.”

* * *

Kaeden didn’t know what to think, when the royal emissary arrived at her and Miara’s doorstep. He kept his missive brief and mysterious, claiming the palace was conducting a survey with recent refugees, that she and her sister were needed at their earliest convenience. Having busied her hands to no end since the morning, the image of Ahsoka in those holos seared like a brand in her memory, Kaeden and Miara left with the representative and sailed to the palace, the both of them relieved to be distracted from the horrors they’d witnessed.

It was there they met the Queen Breha Organa, her daughter Leia, the golden protocol droid C-3PO and were also properly introduced to the blue and silver plated astromech R2-D2. The Queen explained the situation in the privacy of her office, offering them food and drink as they listened to her speak,

”Recently, my husband took a trip. Officially, he is managing a relief mission in the outer-rim. He does this often enough that his constant travel doesn’t come under too-heavy scrutiny.”

Breha paused, gaze soft but expectant. Kaeden took it upon herself to nod her understanding, Miara distracted as she was with Leia, the two of them sitting on the floor playing a game of their own creation and letting out intermittent peels of laughter.

”As you’ve been made aware very recently, however, Bail’s relief and mercy missions go beyond what the Empire would deem acceptable courses of action. Realistically, if he were to be caught, he’d be killed.”

Kaeden nodded solemnly; she’d witnessed first hand what the Empire was capable of. She’d lived through it. Breha acknowledged this, sympathy and sorrow lacing her words,

”I don’t tell you this to impart on you the severity of our situation. I know you of all people understand the repercussions for defying the Empire — no matter how small or intention-less they are. But you must be growing anxious, what with all my double-speak. I think you’re very brave for facing all you have.”

”... If I might speak freely, majesty,” Kaeden shuddered out of her system. Breha inclined her head for her to do so.

”I don’t think I’m very brave,” Kaeden started. “I don’t think I would’ve survived under the Empire, if it weren’t for... for the efforts of your husband and Ahsoka and Captain Antilles. I’m scared, but I’m trying to not be. I saw what happened to Ahsoka. Do you know if Rex found her? Is she safe?”

”That’s exactly why I brought you here, today,” Breha responded. Taking this as a cue, the astromech Artoo rolled forward, depositing a small holodisk into her palm. Breha offered her a smile as she offered it out. Kaeden took it with equal parts trepidation and eagerness. Her heart pounded at the prospect of whatever Breha was promising.

”Ahsoka Tano is alive,” Breha said. “She wants to make contact with you.”

* * *

Ahsoka sat aboard Bail’s cruiser, line idling on the holo-pedestal before her. Having had a much needed shower and presented with a change of clothes — white and navy fatigues belonging to a member of Bail’s envoy, Sheltay Retrac — she now felt only slightly less nervous about the conversation she was soon to have...

... and let out the breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding when Kaeden and Miara finally blipped to life before her eyes.

”Ahsoka!” They exclaimed in unison, worry and relief warring for dominance across their expressions.

” _Hi_...” She whispered, looking their holo-images over, sighing with alleviation when she saw they looked relatively fine. On the surface, better than fine, actually. Kaeden’s arm seemed to be in working order again. Her hair was back in its braids, and there were no visible cuts or scars on what expanses of skin were visible.

”Ahsoka, we saw what happened,” Miara spoke first, and rapidly, “Is your leg really—?”

” _Miara!_ ” Kaeden whisper-hissed, shaking her head at her sister as she chastised, “Don’t _just_ —”

”It’s okay,” Ahsoka interjected. “What you saw... it was real.”

”Oh, Ahsoka...” Kaeden murmured, expression falling. Ahsoka looked her horror in the face — she wondered if her own face reflected it.

”I’m so glad you’re both safe,” Ahsoka said, too afraid to broach the subject of the others. They weren’t present. That was telling enough. “I was afraid that when I was taken, that... but seeing you alright is... I’m _so sorry._ ”

”What for?” Kaeden asked softly. “You did all you could... I realize that now. Ahsoka, I was _so wrong_. What I said to you when I was angry... I take it back. If anyone should be apologizing to anyone, it’s me to you.”

“Kaeden...”

”You’re with the Prince now, right? Rex found you?” Miara asked desperately, “That thing can’t hurt you anymore?”

Ahsoka chilled when she realized what Miara had meant by _that thing_.

”Ahsoka?” Kaeden asked, swallowing thickly when she’d grown quiet, “What’s wrong?”

Something must have shown in either her face or her posture, some minor shift she couldn’t control or conceal. Ahsoka met the sisters’ gazes head on, first Miara and then Kaeden. She could not avoid this, she knew. She cared entirely too much. It was as Rex had confirmed — they were involved. And, anyway, Ahsoka found herself wanting to tell them. Kaeden, especially. That much hadn’t changed. She doubted it ever would.

Even if it would hurt.

”He’s not what you think,” Ahsoka began.

Kaeden’s expression did nothing for the first few tense, silent seconds. And then her gaze searched Ahsoka’s own, looking for something. When she found it, she visibly recoiled.

”Ahsoka, _what_...?”

”He was my Jedi Master,” Ahsoka explained somberly. “He saved my life countless times. He made a mistake, he’s made _several_. But he’s... he’s _good_. There’s good in him. I’ve witnessed it first hand. I’ve experienced it. I’ve _felt_ it. What he did to me... I don’t expect you to understand, but—”

”No, I don’t understand,” Kaeden cut her off, shaking her head in terrified denial. “What you’re saying doesn’t make sense. Ahsoka, he _killed_ my friends! He _hurt_ you!”

Ahsoka’s lips slammed shut. There was nothing she could say to that. There was no way to defend him, except...

”Kaeden, he’s changed. He... he _won’t_ hurt me anymore.”

”No... just everyone else!” Miara protested. The younger girl turned away and fled from the hologram. Ahsoka called out her name, heart sinking...

”... He’s with you, isn’t he?” Kaeden asked hollowly. “That nightmare that murders?”

Ahsoka looked momentarily away, tried to gather her thoughts. Kaeden’s expression grew disbelieving, and then, to Ahsoka’s dismay, _repulsed_.

”I can’t pretend to understand you, Ahsoka,” Kaeden murmured, voice flat and inflectionless, “but I thought maybe I was starting to.”

”Kaeden,” Ahsoka tried desperately, “ _Please_ _,_ I—”

”I want to trust you, but... I can’t separate what you say from what I saw,” Kaeden cut her off regretfully. “Your words don’t prove anything. I can’t believe them unless I see the change for myself.”

Ahsoka expected her to end the connection then and there, but Kaeden held on for a moment longer, something akin to desperation in her eyes. When Ahsoka could not respond, and though she struggled to find the words, the look Kaeden gave her morphed into disappointment. With a shake of her head, she looked down...

And the holo fizzled away. Ahsoka was left alone.

* * *

He was unconscious when she found him again, moving to slow awareness as she prodded at him in the Force. The eyes were blue when they opened, and his recollection, she felt, hazy. He parted his lips on an aborted gasp when he realized the mask was missing — and then frowned when the struggle did not present.

”They’ve repaired your lungs, and your vocal chords. And everything else that was damaged, on the inside,” Ahsoka spoke. She sat just beside him, mindful of all the wires still strapped to and within him. “Do you feel a difference?”

”... The pain is less pronounced.”

”You’ve still a ways to go,” Ahsoka informed. She fiddled idly with her hands, which rested in her lap, which she suddenly couldn’t look away from. “They’re working on something for the skin, and the eyes and the prosthetics. They say if all goes well, you’ll be back in working shape within the next two days.”

She turned her head to the side, met his unreadable expression...

”This was all possible a year ago,” Ahsoka told him. “They said the state you were in was tortuous, that it was avoidable. Did you know? Did you have a say? Or did Palpatine force you into it?”

Anakin, infuriatingly, said nothing.

Ahsoka sighed, made to stand when—

“You still haven’t told me where it was you went, when you disappeared.”

Ahsoka sat back down. She didn’t grapple with her words as she had so many times before, having imagined this very scenario in between his surgeries, having planned and prepared for it.

”It was like a limbo, no life but no death... and _portals_. I met... people... there.”

”Were they the ones who gave you that sword?”

”No,” Ahsoka said carefully.

“Then who?”

”I won’t tell you,” Ahsoka decided to be honest with him — even if it aggravated him. Perhaps it would encourage him to be honest with her. “I don’t think you’ll like the answer.”

He took a deep, calming breath...

... but did not protest her decision.

”There is something I _can_ tell you, though,” she continued a moment after. “Something I learned when I listened... voices that came to me. I think I understood what they needed to say, but before I can relay their message, I need to know something: what happened to Padmé?”

On Anakin’s face, nothing. In the Force... _agony_.

”Obi-Wan didn’t tell you?” He asked. Cruelly, “I _killed_ her.”

Ahsoka didn’t let his tone or his demeanor deter her.

”How do you know?”

Anakin’s gaze flickered.

“... _What?_ ”

”How do you know _you_ killed her?”

For the barest, briefest moment, anger swelled around him, spread outward like heat. He thought her line of questioning too casual for the topic of discussion, but Ahsoka battled back against his assumption. This was not her downplaying what happened. This was her trying to relieve him of the burden of misplaced remorse.

”You didn’t kill Padmé,” she whispered. “What you did was devastating but... it didn’t kill her. Obi-Wan said she died... in another way. I know Sidious told you that your anger took her life — I heard him speak those words, in the world I walked into — but he lied. I _know_ he did. He did it to keep you compliant. He did it to keep you by his side.”

Anakin screwed his eyes shut, looked away. But it was too late. His tears had already slipped free.

“How did she die? If I didn’t kill her, then what did?”

Ahsoka faltered. This, she hadn’t prepared for. She tried to think of what to say when—

A door opened. A doctor emerged...

Ahsoka stood, at once reluctantly and too-quickly, and left the room.

It was time for Anakin to undergo another round of surgeries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “he’s building his own pyre,” was my Star Wars idiom equivalent to “he’s digging his own grave”
> 
> if you’ve read my other Kaeden/Ahsoka fic, you might’ve caught a small reference to it in this chapter :)
> 
> I don’t know much about Breha Organa — but I like the idea that she’d be less paranoid than Bail about discussing the Rebellion and riskier moves against the Empire while in the presence of Leia (at least, while her daughter is still an infant and distracted by Miara)
> 
> [sheltay retrac](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Sheltay_Retrac)
> 
> there’s a theory (and a really powerful film analysis to back it up) that the reason Padmé dies is because of Sidious siphoning her life energy to keep Anakin alive. I personally consider this canon and it influenced my approach to this chapter’s final scene. I think the article is an interesting read — I recommend giving it a try, if you’re still skeptical
> 
> source: [article](https://www.retrozap.com/padme-didnt-die-of-a-broken-heart/)
> 
> ironic (and by ironic I mean poetically painful) that the place Padmé died is the same place Anakin’s being treated for his injuries at, right? :/


	27. Rebellion pt. II

In a rare moment of total solitude, Ahsoka isolated herself within the walls of one of the rooms aboard the _Silver Angel_ , took up the lotus and allowed her mind enter with the Force in a way she hadn’t before; not since after the events of Order 66, at least, when her calling echoed infinitely into an abyss named Anakin Skywalker.

 _Anakin_.

He was closer than ever, yet still so far away. More disturbing than the ways in which he felt different were the ways in which he did not. At his core, she sensed he was still the same. But the parts of him that made him who he was had all sharpened, intensified, become _twisted_. That was the dark side, she knew. It manifested one’s fears, weakened their resolve. It showed them the easier path and all the reasons why they should take it.

 _Anakin_.

Ahsoka knew there was no more defending him. She’d brought him as far from the edges of his fall as she could, had mustered all of her strength just to do it. There was no going back. Not for any of them. He knew this as well as she; she _knew_ he did. He’d made his choice at the shrine that sat beneath the Temple. When he’d been tasked with standing aside and allowing Sidious perform his machinations, he’d stepped forward. Ahsoka could remember that, specifically: the way he’d reached out to her, both before and after the twins’ and Ezra’s intervention. When it came down to deciding between Sidious and her, Anakin had chosen _her_.

 _”I waited for you,”_ she longed to tell him. _“When I was all alone, still trying to figure out everything that had happened... I imagined so many settings, so many skies — on any world I wandered — that I’d look to... and there would be a ship, and there’d you’d be on the skiff once it landed. You’d find me, and it wouldn’t matter anymore how alone I’d been, or how scared. Because there you were. There’d you be.”_

But imaging such a thing when she’d known it weren’t possible had threatened to send her off her own deep end.

_”In the end, I suppose you did find me.”_

But it was not in the way she’d expected, nor in the way she’d wanted. Not at all.

Ahsoka opened her eyes, shook her head. She felt a slight tug in the Force, stood slowly and approached the wall in the room she occupied. She ran her hand along the panels, knocked on one...

 _Hollow_.

Pushing with her palm, the panel clicked and sprang forward. Ahsoka peered inside, found her sabers and her sword. _Right_ , she remembered, _Rex hid them for me_. Grabbing them, Ahsoka laid each item out across the floor before her. She then sat once more, closed her eyes and focused on the energies...

The Inquisitor’s saber levitated in the air before her, came apart piece by piece, revealing the crystals within. Ahsoka inhaled slowly, turned her hands palm up...

... and the crystals landed in either one.

Ahsoka exhaled as she wrapped her fingers around the kyber. Light poured over her shut lids, engulfed the room. Ahsoka opened her eyes to find the energy shining through the cracks in her fists. Her breath caught, amazed...

The light dissipated. Ahsoka let out a startled, shaky exhale. When she slowly uncurled her fists, the crystals glowed a faint, luminescent white.

* * *

Ahsoka entered Barriss’s room, quickly looking her over as she drew near. Barriss was laid out across her side on a med-bed, short hair framing a face that appeared slightly less swallow than before. Barriss smiled weakly when Ahsoka approached her side, went to sit up...

”No, don’t,” Ahsoka shook her head. “It’s alright. I just wanted to check on you.”

”I’m feeling much better,” Barriss said, as if sensing that was what Ahsoka would soon ask. She reached out a hand and asked, “Are you?”

Ahsoka let her hand settle into Barriss’s own, allowed her gauge for herself the answer. Barriss closed her eyes in concentration as she reached out in the Force. Her brow furrowed after several moments, the grip of her hand tightening the slightest fraction...

”I felt... _something_... before,” Barriss spoke after another long moment. “When I healed your palm. Something about you felt _different_. I thought maybe it was something to do with whatever had you in the infirmary. But... it’s still there. On Geonosis, I never felt it. When we were on the brink of death, buried beneath the factory, and we touched hands... I felt how near you were to it. But I don’t feel it anymore. You feel altered. I don’t have the words to explain how I mean. Ahsoka, did something happen to you?”

Ahsoka let her hand slip free. Barriss opened her eyes, watched her with concern...

”I’m not what I was,” Ahsoka whispered. She stared at the palm of her hand — unblemished, now, because of Barriss — seemingly unchanged. Indeed, the entirety of her had not changed in any significant way. At least, not on the outside. Her lekku had tapered slightly, in the year since Mandalore. They’d grown a few inches, too, and the markings on her face had elongated marginally, but...

But it was not obvious, what had happened to her; not unless someone were looking in the way Barriss knew how.

Ahsoka began anew, “I didn’t have the memory of this until just recently, but during the war, Anakin, Obi-Wan and I discovered a conduit — we discovered beings there, three who represented a different facet of the Force: the light, the dark and the balance. When they discovered Anakin was the Chosen One, the Son — the dark side — used me to try to turn Anakin. He... corrupted me. He killed me. He also killed his Sister — the light side — in the process. She, her Father — the balance — and Anakin all brought me back to life. But they were ancient beings. When the Daughter used what was left of her life to resurrect me, it changed me. I’m _immortal_ , now, in a way. But... not in others? I’m not sure. I don’t truly understand it.”

She shook her head helplessly, shrugged and finished, “Maybe I never will.”

“... You _died_?” Barriss asked.

Ahsoka scoffed, disbelieving.

 _”That’s_ what you’re hung up on? I just told you I met the three versions of the Force incarnate and all you go back to is the fact that I died?”

Barriss chastised, “Don’t treat the matter so lightly, Ahsoka.”

”Believe me,” Ahsoka whispered. “I’m _not_. I’m _scared_ , Barriss.”

“... If only Master Yoda were here,” Barriss murmured, eyes downcast. “He might be able to impart some wisdom.”

The reminder that Master Yoda was indeed _alive_ spurred Ahsoka into motion. Barriss watched her hurry for the exit with wide eyes.

”What’s wrong?” She called out. Ahsoka threw over her shoulder before she sped down the hall in pursuit of Obi-Wan, wherever he might be, “No time to explain — but Master Yoda is alive. Obi-Wan told me.”

”... _Master Kenobi_ is alive, _too_?” Barriss asked, bewildered, but Ahsoka was already gone.

* * *

“Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan tried to reason, “not even Master Yoda could defeat Sidious.”

”There’s strength in numbers,” Ahsoka insisted. “He went alone before, and the Force was severely out of balance. He could help us, now that he has us. If you’d just tell me where he is, I could contact him and convince him.”

”And then what? Bring him here?” Obi-Wan asked, disbelieving, “With Anakin in the state he is, mind unraveled, believing that everyone save for yourself have betrayed him? How do you imagine that will go?”

Anakin was one operation away from being cleared for release. Ahsoka had no doubt Obi-Wan and Bail had discussed what would be done about him, once that time came. The worst case scenario wouldn’t come to pass — she wouldn’t allow it.

”Anakin’s _changed_ ,” she reminded him.

”So you keep insisting,” Obi-Wan responded. Raising skeptical brow, he asked, “But who are you truly trying to convince? Me, or yourself?”

”I told you already,” she insisted, “when I emerged from the portal, he was buried. He fought Sidious. And you know why, now! He _knows_ he was manipulated.”

Obi-Wan sighed, entire frame slumping from the effort and the strain of it.

”I don’t _understand_ it, though,” he muttered helplessly. “Why didn’t he tell me? I could have... I would have helped. In whatever way I was capable, I _would_ have helped.”

Ahsoka didn’t understand, either. In her eyes, Anakin and Obi-Wan had always seemed the most inseparable of confidants. But Anakin had been nothing if not constant contradictions. He’d sacrifice his life for his friends, his fellow Jedi — in fact, he had, on several occasions — but not his secrets. Maybe it wasn’t all that surprising then that he’d guarded his visions of Padmé from Obi-Wan. But nothing was ever so simple. Had a past incident dissuaded Anakin from seeking his Master’s advice? Had a moment of confiding been brushed aside? She knew Obi-Wan’s love for Anakin was as strong as her own, but love did not always cancel out careless faults, or unintentional mistakes. However, Ahsoka didn’t doubt for a second that Obi-Wan had been willing to avert his gaze same as her, if it meant granting Anakin happiness.

“I’ve realized, these last few days,” Ahsoka started anew, “that I must not have known Anakin as well as I’d thought. Or maybe I knew him too well. Maybe my faith was blind, but he’s here, and he hasn’t totaled the facility yet.”

”He threatened to kill me, Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan deadpanned.

”But has he?” Ahsoka retaliated, not missing a beat.

An exasperated sigh followed her question, courtesy of a supremely tired Obi-Wan. Ahsoka raised a single brow-marking in challenge.

”Yoda is on Dagobah,” Obi-Wan finally relented. “ _Please_ , make haste. I’d prefer you be there and back before Anakin is on his feet again.”

* * *

“Keep an eye on him,” she instructed Rex. She’d commandeered a small, single-seater space craft in the hangar, Rex at the door acting as look out as she prepped it for take-off. _It’s only stealing_ , she reasoned with herself, _if you have no intention of returning it after._ “I should be back in less than a standard rotation.”

”Be safe,” Rex bid her farewell, knowing that trying to convince her to stay would be futile. He’d already attempted persuade her let him tag along and failed. “Contact me as soon as you land.”

”I will,” she promised, and then the ship sealed itself. She took to the stars...

... and far away, on Alderaan, Miara took to the little girl who’d lost her appetite.

”We haven’t been able to get her to eat much of anything,” one of the orphanage workers informed. “Do you think you can help?”

”What’s her name?” Miara asked, observing said child. She was still sitting at the kitchen table, tray of food sitting in front of her, untouched.

”Hedala Fardi,” the orphanage worker explained. “She’s only been here for a few days, but if this keeps up, it could be a detriment to her health.”

”Is she ill?”

”...Not in body. Not that our physicians could find, anyway. It’s an illness of the mind. She was traumatized. We don’t know the details, but she’s been seeing a specialist for it. These things take time, however. Queen Breha recommended you personally. She said you connected with the Princess instantly.”

Miara blushed. Queen Breha had put in good word for her, even though she’d only managed to keep Leia’s attention for a whopping ten standard minutes? Miara couldn’t say if she was truly good with children or not. Leia had been one of the first she’d ever had the joy of entertaining. Though her knowledge was limited, she knew what worked for one child rarely worked for another.

”I’ll see what I can do,” Miara said anyway, and approached the child who looked up shyly with a warm smile.

* * *

Mace Windu twisted his new wrist, listened to the barely audible whir of the servos that resided within. The hand was, thus far, the last in a long list of additions he’d acquired in a little over a galactic year. One of said additions sat just near him, body held in psuedo-rest as _The Mantis_ flew them through hyperspace and towards Bogano.

”You aren’t fooling anyone,” Mace reminded his companion, the teasing in his tone disguised by austerity.

”I’m meditating,” Maul retorted, contrite, but no real bite to his words. Not anymore. Maul opened his eyes, no more the unnatural shade of gold and red they’d been when Mace had found him — now they were brown, dark as space. Mace had asked, the first day he’d woken up and discovered the change, if Maul could remember the way they’d been before Sidious took him.

Maul had claimed he couldn’t remember anything. The tragedy in his tone had kept Mace from inquiring anymore about his past. In time, the former Jedi Master knew, Maul would come to him when or if he was ready.

”About?” Mace asked. Outwardly, he was careful to conceal his concern. Maul considered the sentiment patronizing, on the best days — downright challenge on the worst.

And very rarely did Maul meditate by choice. Mace had discovered quickly that meditation was usually produced by unsolicited vision; it was a happening Maul had no precise control over — it bespoke of his chaotic relationship with the Force, even still.

In the weeks and months it took to gain one another’s trust, Maul had explained his final moments before the rise of the Empire. Slowly but surely, he’d filled in the gaps Ahsoka and the three others in the obsidian realm could not.

Sidious had been grooming Anakin since his adolescence, had been feeding him whatever lies he could conjure for years. All of his scheming had taken as long, but it had payed off in the end. He’d wanted Anakin isolated, wanted him without support. And he’d gotten it.

”A reckoning,” Maul whispered, eyes glossing over. “And soon.”

”For whom?” Mace asked.

Maul shook his head. Sometimes, his visions were highly specific. Other times, vaguely outlined.

”It remains to be seen,” he replied ominously. 

”Master Windu!” Cere Junda called, footfalls bounding down the hall. She skidded to a stop when she reached the door and huffed out, catching herself on the lip of the door, “I just intercepted Imperial transmission concerning Alderaan. Inquisitors are headed there as we speak.”

Mace stood, Maul swiftly behind him. The matter of the vision would have to wait.  
  
“We need to get there immediately, then,” Mace urged. “More than one Inquisitor is a certainty — there’s a Force sensitive there. They’ve made themselves known.”

”And they need our help,” Cere nodded once before turning and hurrying back down the hall as the ship — courtesy their pilot Greez — plunged out of hyperspace. “Way ahead of you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (for those who haven’t read the Ahsoka novel) the section pertaining to what Ahsoka longed to tell Anakin was inspired directly by the Ahsoka novel. Every moment of that book is painful (especially in the beginning) but there’s one part specifically that I refer to. In it, the narrator expresses Ahsoka’s desire for Anakin to show up and find her. Eventually, she let’s go of this fantasy because in the Force, she can’t feel him. She decides he’s really gone. :_(
> 
> to one who’d asked me chapters ago if fallen order characters would appear — I truly hadn’t expected to write them in but now they’re here!


	28. Rebellion pt. III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 02/04/21 - edited a “continuity error” I hadn’t caught when I first published this chapter

Dagobah felt like an epicenter, a starting point. Ahsoka slipped out of her seat, threw her legs over the side of the ship and landed in mud. It splattered up the legs of her suit and prosthetic. It’d be a mess to clean later. Now she understood Artoo’s servo struggles on Tatooine.

After contacting Rex that she’d landed, Ahsoka walked slowly through the marsh, reached out and navigated the dense fog that permeated the space around her. She felt something fairly quickly into her journey, as if a pair of eyes were watching her from the denser part of the jungle just beyond. Ahsoka turned, finding nothing. After a moment of inspection, she decided to continue on. Though she kept her guard considerably more up than before.

Unbeknownst to her, a cluster of twinkling lights carried their way through the mist and trees, all the way from her location to that of the one she sought out. This cluster of lights spoke, too.

”She’s arrived,” the late Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn informed Yoda, who tended to the wood in his fireplace. “You should go out and welcome her.”

* * *

Soon enough, Ahsoka found the one she’d sought. The fog parted like curtains, revealing to her Grand Master Yoda, and his saddened expression. One look at him standing just feet ahead in a clearing revealed to Ahsoka that her speedy discovery might have been the Jedi Master’s doing, not her own. He must have sensed her arrival.

He all but confirmed it when he spoke, solemn,

”Much to discuss we have, it seems.”

* * *

He lived in a half constructed hut of his own design. Ahsoka crouched before a fireplace, accepting the cup of broth Yoda handed her with gratefulness. Meals had been few and far between since the moment she’d escaped. She grimaced when she sipped at it, realizing she hadn’t been looking out for herself as much as Rex had. She owed him a lot.

Yoda limped his way around to the other side of the fire, his cane his only support. Ahsoka was struck by an image she’d seen countless times but had always been blind to: Master Yoda was tired. When she’d met him, he’d hadn’t seemed so. But the war had taken its toll. He was tired and... visibly, he seemed defeated. All of that coupled, no matter Yoda’s ability with a saber or his knowledge in the Force...

She explained the situation anyway, the entirety of it, unable to stop until she had. Now, Yoda knew everything. But he was silent. He had said nothing thus far.

”You won’t help us, will you?” Ahsoka asked quietly, feeling she already knew the answer.

For a long time, Master Yoda was silent. He stared into the flames of his fireplace, working sore knots out of his hands that still rested atop his cane. When he did speak, it was so quiet and so final.

But more than anything, it was a relief, a cool balm on an open sore.

”Help you, I will. But turn the tide, will I? For nothing, all this way you came, perhaps.”

Ahsoka shook her head, dismayed by his words. How could he think that?

”Fought, I have,” he explained, as if she’d asked the question of him. “Failed, I did. Fail again, I will. Sure of this, I am. The one you seek, not me, are they.”

Ahsoka wilted like a dying leaf. There was so much conviction in his voice, leaving her no room for her to argue.

”Wasted,” Yoda said regretfully, pinning her with a solemn look, “was your trip.”

”... Then what can I do?”

Yoda hummed. After taking a moment to seemingly weigh whatever was on his mind, Yoda hobbled to his feet, started for the outside. He gestured Ahsoka along, and she stood without a word, following him into the forest. They walked for some time, Ahsoka pushing branches and hanging vines out of the way as they went. They finally stopped just feet before the entrance of a cave, the innards of which seemed to be whispering.

”This is a well,” Ahsoka realized, surveying the opening. It housed a mysterious energy in the Force. Not darkness, but not light, either...

“Inside, will you go,” Yoda instructed, moving to a rest just feet away atop a log. “Answers, will you find. Show you, it will.”

 _Show me?_ Ahsoka wondered, stepping forward anyway. Yoda stuck his cane out, caught her by the ankle. When she turned back, a question in her gaze, he nodded to her weapons and said,

”Need those, you will not.”

Ahsoka bit the inside of her cheek. Realistically, she knew that he meant the threats she might find in the cave wouldn’t require a weapon, but her hand hesitated just above the sword anyway. Shmi had been adamant she keep it close. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust to leave it behind with Yoda, only that...

... now she questioned if the hands Shmi had warned her not to let the sword fall into were perhaps her own.

“I have to know,” Ahsoka said. “But I’ll leave these.”

Lowering, Ahsoka laid her new sabers side by side on the ground. Yoda shook his head as she walked away, and she pretended his disappointed look didn’t sting.

Sounds became muted, the further she ventured. Her sense in the Force heightened. Anakin emerged from bramble not long after she stepped into a semi-clearing, and though she knew his presence was a mere illusion — it had to be, for he donned the suit they’d discarded the moment the doctors had stripped him of it on Polis Massa — the Force sent her a sharp, visceral warning anyway.

”Join me,” he said, low and sinister and nothing like him at all. Not anymore. It couldn’t be. _This isn’t possible_ , Ahsoka reminded herself.She’d brought him back _._ Despite her denials, despite her wills to wish this form of him away, Anakin did not move, did not dissipate like the figment of the imagination he surely was. The longer she remained motionless in her spot, the more she felt an agitation building up inside him, boiling steadily into a fury. 

_This cannot be real_.

But it felt like it was. And it reminded her of standing in the Council Chambers, Anakin with his arm out, his fingers uncurling to reveal her padawan braid.

 _We’ve been here before_ , Ahsoka realized. She’d rejected him then. She couldn’t accept him now... right? He moved a fraction of an inch closer. Ahsoka gasped, shaking her head. No. This wasn’t right. Not for her, anyway. And on a momentous scale, it wasn’t right for the galaxy. Slowly, the hand Vader had extended began to curl into a fist, began to shake...

“No,” she pleaded, voice wobbling. The thought of him reverting back to this was hurting her beyond comprehension. “ _You_ join _me_.”

The weight of the blade at her hip was never more apparent than as she said those words.

And what she’d said, Ahsoka realized too late, wasn’t what he’d wanted to hear.

* * *

“Show you, did it?” Master Yoda asked her later. She’d emerged from the cave, the phantom pain of a lightsaber’s slash throbbing through her middle. The apparition of him had stabbed her in retaliation. After she’d fallen, it had all disappeared.

Was this her fate? Had it all been for nothing?

Ahsoka unclipped the blade from her belt, studying the hilt. Finally, it dawned on her — the answer. She knew now why Yoda had insisted the weapon was unneeded.

It was never meant for her.

”I understand, now, why you’d asked me to leave this behind. You wanted me to doubt you. You said that so I _would_ take it, so I could make the wrong choice now to make the right one later.” Ahsoka said.

Master Yoda’s smile wasn’t bright nor proud, but rather sad. It told her she’d drawn the right conclusions, though, and that was all that mattered.

Ahsoka retrieved her sabers, reattached them to her sides. She clipped the blade back into place, too, all with the knowledge that it wouldn’t remain with her for much longer. It had been a test, Ahsoka could now ascertain, but certainly not a trick.

”Ready, you are,” Master Yoda said.

Together, they boarded her ship, left Dagobah and zipped through the stars back to Polis Massa.

All the while, the cluster of lights looked on and rejoiced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Tom Kane. May he recover well and recover soon.


	29. Rebellion pt. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made the tiniest error in the last update regarding the fate of Vader’s suit, but as of this update it’s been fixed. Also, apologizes once again about the many, many times I’ve mistakenly updated without proof reading, resulting in my having to go back and update later, after it’s been caught. Thank you all immensely for your patience. Please enjoy the next installment

Finding Master Windu, Master Kenobi, Master Yoda and even Darth Maul conversing amongst themselves aboard Bail Organa’s cruiser was... strange, after the events of the last year, to say the least. Ahsoka didn’t know how Maul and Master Kenobi managed it, being civil after their history. She wondered if that civility would last.

Ahsoka couldn’t say the image of all of them together had exactly crossed her mind, but in hindsight, she surmised, it had been bound to happen eventually, after everything that had occurred in the world between worlds. Such a sight would have presented itself soon enough, given time. A bit surprising was the sight happening so soon, but it wasn’t overtly worrying. Not as worrying as the one they were keeping in force-inhibiting binders below deck. Ahsoka couldn’t find it in herself to face Anakin yet. Though she’d caught a glimpse of his face in their mad dash to flee Polis Massa, she hadn’t yet talked to him since her return. Her mind was too preoccupied with other things, such as the state of mind of the ones sitting before her, only a tables distance between them, the both of them unreadable expressions, feelings a tangle in the Force.

”Miara challenged me to a food-eating contest, it was really fun!” Hedala explained, tucked into Ahsoka’s side, the former Jedi holding her loosely but closely. The young girl was recounting to Ahsoka the events that had led them to one another again. “But then I sensed the shadows were back, so I started running. Miara chased after me. The shadows almost caught us, but then that man with the patterns on his skin saved us.”

She pointed to Maul. Ahsoka reluctantly tore her attention away from the Larte sisters just in time for him to look up. They made wary eye-contact with one another. Ahsoka worked her jaw, held his stare with a meaningful, imploring look. It would be the only thanks he’d get from her. The slight nod of his head indicated he understood that. Bygones, it would seem, would be bygones. Hopefully. Ahsoka, though somewhat cautious of him, had to acknowledge that Master Windu trusted him and he’d saved lives on Alderaan. But was it a means to an end? Were his heroics mere portrayals to perform in front of them, just a way for him to get to Sidious and take his revenge? And then what? Who was to say he’d really and truly changed since Mandalore?

”He took us to his friend’s ship,” Hedala continued, “and then his friend brought Miara’s sister.”

“You were in danger?” Ahsoka asked Kaeden, forcing herself to eradicate the panic behind those words. She tried to backpedal too late, realizing she’d jumped to conclusions. She didn’t need to give Hedala anymore reasons to be scared, nor any more reason for Kaeden to be upset.

Kaeden shifted uncomfortably and responded,

”One of the red-blades found me. But Mace Windu got to me in time. So stop looking me over for bruises and wounds, I’m fine.”

Ahsoka averted her gaze, not conscious of that fact that she had been.

”Ahsoka,” Miara spoke up after several painfully long seconds of silence, not quite able to meet her eyes, “I’m sorry for how I reacted over the holo.”

Ahsoka’s lips parted. Kaeden cut her gaze to her sister, eyes flashing.

”Miara,” Ahsoka whispered, sensing things might escalate, “It’s—”

”Don’t say it’s fine,” Miara snapped, voice hushed. Ahsoka realized why when Miara’s eyes flickered between her and the one she held in her arms. Hedala had drifted off to sleep, the days events exhausting her down. Ahsoka brushed the strands of hair that had fallen into Hedala’s face out of the way. She needed to rest, and Ahsoka needed to finish this conversation. As if sensing her dilemma, Barriss appeared at her side not moments later. She made a grabbing gesture with her hands, and Ahsoka handed her charge off reluctantly. She found all she wanted to do now was keep one eye on the Fardi girl, always worried about her. Barriss carried Hedala off, patting her back gently as she disappeared from the common room to a corner of the ship less occupied and more quiet. Ahsoka watched them until they were out of sight, then turned her attention back to the younger Larte sister.

”We found out about what happened to Hedala on the way here,” Miara confessed. Ahsoka bristled. She didn’t have to imagine what that meant. Hedala had been traumatized. Logically, Hedala needed to talk it out. And Miara had proven to be someone Hedala could trust, encouraging her to eat in a way that distracted her from the events of the last few days, that made it fun. “She told us about you. Her memory is disjointed and I don’t think she’s been able to process everything yet, but...”

Miara trailed off, sighing. When she spoke again, it was clipped and callous but it gave Ahsoka hope.

”She trusts you. And there’s a reason she trusts you. So I’ll trust you, too.”

It was like a weight had grown wings and risen from the surface of Ahsoka’s heart. It beat better then, for some reason. But then Kaeden said, spearing it before it’d had a chance to truly fly,

”It isn’t like we have a choice, Miara. We’re at her mercy, now.”

Ahsoka withdrew after that. Both mentally and physically. Better to let actions speak louder than words, if Kaeden believed such a thing. Deep within her, Ahsoka knew Kaeden probably didn’t — had said what she’d said because she was hurt, and scared. But that didn’t make it any less valid. So Ahsoka stepped away. She found Rex and Cody in a room aboard the cruiser, the two of them finally resting. Ahsoka crawled into the spare, unoccupied bunk opposite the ones they slumbered in and shut her eyes.

When she opened them again, the room was empty, and she was alone.

Ahsoka took a few moments to wake up fully, feeling groggy and disoriented. She sat up, let the events of the previous few hours wash over her. What had happened? She recalled in increments that she’d returned to Polis Massa only to have to leave not mere moments after. Obi-Wan had explained in their rush that Mace Windu had made contact and had _guests_ , as he’d put it. They attached the ship he arrived on to Bail’s cruiser, loaded an unconscious Anakin fresh from his final operation — body entombed in a literal preservation capsule, of all things — onto the ship and took off into light speed, destination hopping until they’d thought they’d shaken their pursuers off their trail. When things had settled down, Ahsoka finally found out that the Inquisitors had come to Alderaan, tipped off by the younglings’ presence. They’d come for Hedala, for the others. Maul, Cere Junda and Mace had taken care of them, rescuing Hedala, Kaeden and Miara in the process. The Inquisitors who’d come to Alderaan had perished.

All except for one.

”I couldn’t bring myself to stop her,” Cere revealed later in the day, recounting her own version of the events. “She was my padawan. I couldn’t... I’d subjected her to that fate. I froze and... she got away.”

The padawan in question, Ahsoka had discovered, was the Second Sister — a former Jedi by the name of Trilla Suduri. She’d been captured following the purge.

”They broke her,” Cere confessed quietly. She held her arms tight to herself and shuddered, “And I _let_ them.”

Ahsoka shifted her weight from one foot to the other, absorbing the new information with everyone else. She sympathized with Cere Junda, sensing there had to be more to the story, but letting the story simmer and settle anyway. The terror of Order 66 had changed them all. Better to come to terms and figure out ones grief on their own. Ahsoka doubted her words — that of a strangers, to Cere Junda — would mean much anyway.

Ahsoka stood near the back of the cruiser’s meeting room, the only other occupants for the time being including Obi-Wan, Junda, Windu, Yoda, Rex, Cody and Maul. After emerging from her room and finding the others, it had gone unspoken that they all needed to talk, and so they’d wandered to where the now resided. After a check in with his wife that the situation on Alderaan had stabilized and that the Force sensitive children had been relocated, the Senator had joined them, too, offering news and intelligence gathered about Nur. That was when Cere had spoken up, informing them of the tight security, how difficult it would be to infiltrate, and her own experiences within its underwater fortress.

Now they deliberated, but every plan someone suggested was shot down. Too many flaws, too many risk factors. No one wanted to address the very obvious advantage they had, so Ahsoka took it upon herself to step up.

”We have Anakin,” she said.

The room instantly quieted. Obi-Wan was the first to meet her gaze. The look he gave her...

”Are you suggesting we unleash the Empire’s rabid dog and set him upon our enemies?” Maul asked, tone bitingly sarcastic. Ahsoka gave him a hardened look. He continued, undeterred, “What makes you think he wouldn’t run right back into the roomier, more familiar cage? We haven’t a treat alluring enough to persuade him back to us, when that happens.”

”... _If_ that happens. Which it _won’t._ ” Ahsoka managed to say, breathing out the worst of the bad temper Maul inspired within her, “I understand where you’re coming from. But you’re wrong about his loyalties.”

”Indeed,” Maul intoned, pointing at her to emphasize what he next spoke. “Loyalty to one, loyalty to none.”

” _Maul_ ,” Mace warned.

”I’m not wrong to be cautious,” Maul fired back.

”And _I_ am?” Ahsoka questioned, leveling with Maul with severe look. “You’re only goal was to defeat Sidious, before. Who’s to say you won’t be guilty of the very thing you suspect Anakin of, now?”

Maul’s lips tapered into a thin line.

”I saved the life of that youngling,” Maul reminded her, not viscously nor lowly, but quietly, calmly. “And I did so without the knowledge that you so share a connection.”

And with that, he stood. His exit was swift. In his wake was only silence until,

”Ahsoka,” Bail began, sympathetic, but stern. “You realize that, once this is all over — once we’ve established a new Republic and reestablished democracy — Anakin will have to pay for his crimes.”

“And Maul?” She asked.

”Yes,” Master Windu replied instantly. “ _And_ Maul.”

”And does he know?” Ahsoka challenged.

”He’s been aware,” Master Windu responded, clipped, “since the day he agreed to be my padawan.”  
  
Ahsoka averted her gaze. She caught the look on Obi-Wan’s face, conflicted, full of remorse and regret...

”If I ask this of Anakin...” Ahsoka started anew, no less certain than before, but more afraid than ever, “He’ll help us.”

For what reasons, she couldn’t say. But she was certain of at least that. He _would_ help them.

”Then go to him, you will,” Master Yoda instructed. “Determine for yourself, his willingness, you shall.”


	30. Reconcile pt. I

The guards flanking his cell let him down from the ray-shielded restraints once she was inside and the access was blocked. Ahsoka set down the tray of food she’d brought for him on a counter that emerged from the wall right before his knees hit the floor. Force-inhibiting braces weighed him down at the wrists, the ankles. His hands that caught himself were covered in synthetic flesh. It was a tad jarring, when he lifted his head, to find the face so different just days ago so familiar again. Looking at him directly like that, only scar still prominent the one that curved along the side of his hairless scalp, Ahsoka suspected she’d have been none the wiser about the before, if only ever presented with the after.

She knelt down beside him.

”I was so sure when I came down here that I knew the answer to the question I have to ask you,” Ahsoka started softly. Anakin pushed himself up, sat back on his bent legs and fisted his hands in his lap. He didn’t look at her as she continued, “But I was wrong about something before. I might be wrong about this, too. Your motivations—”

”What do they matter?” Anakin interrupted, voice gravel, not quite right. She tried not to let it show, how jarring he sounded to her. He probably shouldn’t be speaking, Ahsoka thought dimly. Parts of him healed, still.

”I have nothing left,” he continued. He met her look, nothing in his expression. He was stone, marble, the surface of still water. “Is that not valid enough?”

Ahsoka cast a pebble. Ahsoka created ripples that crested into waves.

”You have children,” she said.

Anakin’s face twisted. He eyed her, assessing. He made a sound akin to a protest, but it died in his throat. His nostrils flared in anger, and then his jaw set rigidly.

”No.” Anakin said vehemently. He shook, less certain, “ _No_...”

”Padmé died in childbirth,” Ahsoka spoke like someone walking through water, sluggish, slightly struggling. “The doctors couldn’t understand why. She had twins.”

“H-how?” Anakin asked, agonized. His eyes pinched, watered, spilled. Ahsoka faltered. The entirety of her apprenticeship, she hadn’t seen him react in such ways to anything as she had these last few days. Not even when Obi-Wan had led them to believe he’d died had Anakin cried. Within Anakin there’d been turmoil, but it had never manifested in the form of physical tears. It said so much that there was no more betraying any of his feelings.

”She gave birth, before she died,” Ahsoka recounted what Obi-Wan had told her, “And she said... she believed in you. She knew there was good still left in you. Your children survived, but Padmé... I’m so sorry, Anakin.”

His face blurred before her. She watched his outline hunch over in pain. He turned away from her.

”I’m not telling you this to hurt you,” she said. “Because it hurts me, too. Padmé was my friend. I’m telling you this because I had a... vision. Voices came to me and imparted on me a message, beckoning me to tell you that... the way Padmé died...”

”You claimed I didn’t kill her,” Anakin said, voice wet and wrecked and utterly resigned. “But didn’t I? I know what you speak of. On some level, I always knew something wasn’t right. I felt it, when he pieced me back together. On that operating table, I was on the brink of death.”

Anakin sat up slowly, staring at his hands in his lap with disgust.

”But _he_ was near, and I felt something I couldn’t explain at first, but I knew I’d felt it before. Because I’d _done it_ before.”

He looked at her then, and the look in his eye told her that they were recalling the same thing. _Mortis_. He referred to the day she died and he brought her back, the events in question occurring just within seconds of each other.

”A transference,” he continued. “To save my life...”

”... he used her own.” Ahsoka finished for him. Anakin swallowed thickly.

”It’s my fault.”

Ahsoka shook her head. The tears in her eyes fell.

”How could you think that?” She asked him. “You wouldn’t have done that to her, not consciously.”

”... What makes you so certain?” Anakin asked coldly.

Ahsoka searched his face, unable to say anything. What could she say, even? She’d said enough.

”I don’t believe that of you,” was what she settled with.

Anakin’s gaze, blood-shot from his tears, intensified.

”You came here for something,” he said. Harshly, “So what is it?”

”Nur,” Ahsoka said, wiping at her face. She decided it wouldn’t do her well to beat around with what she needed. “We’re destroying the facility.”

”And you expect me to help you?” He asked.

”I do,” she said. “Not because I rescued you from Sidious, nor because I helped you break free of that suit, or even because of what I revealed here. Whatever you think, I didn’t tell you this to have you indebted to me. I just... needed you to know.”

His gaze sharpened, but it didn’t fool her.

”I know that deep down, you still care about me, and Obi-Wan, and everyone else you betrayed in your descent. You’re conflicted. You’re in pain. But you...”

Ahsoka sighed, trailing off. She took a moment to gather herself and started anew, “This mission is going to be dangerous. I’m not asking you to go because of what knowledge you have about the fortress — though I know you must have some, and I know it would useful — but because the potential of us failing in our attempt to dismantle it is higher than our succeeding. I could get hurt. You promised me once you’d never let that happen.”

Anakin said nothing, but his face registered familiarity. Did it haunt him? Were his broken promises phantoms now, following him around? _Look at yourself_ , Ahsoka reminded herself.

”I’m going. You should eat, and consider what I ask.” Ahsoka stood and continued, “If not for me, at least think of your children. Is this galaxy the one you want them to live in?”

Anakin went quiet. Ahsoka turned on her heel and made for the door.

”Do you know where they are?” Anakin whispered. Ahsoka stopped in her tracks, compelled by the terror those words invoked alone. What had she done? The children had been a secret for a reason. Why hadn’t she kept them as such?

 _Because you trust him,_ a voice in the back of her mind reminded her. _Despite it all, you trust him._

”If you’re going to ask if you can see them...” Ahsoka sighed, “I’ll be honest with you. I’m as in the dark as you are. I didn’t even know that they existed until a few days ago. I know the location of one of them, not the other. And... as it stands, I don’t have the ability to bring them to you.”

”They are my children!” Anakin roared.

Ahsoka hung her head.

”Are you raising them?” She questioned, “Are you feeding and clothing them? Are _you_ taking care of them?”

”I was lied to, led to believe my child was dead! I didn’t even know Padmé was carrying twins!”

”And is that my fault?” Ahsoka fired back, cutting him off. She turned back to face him. The look in her eye matched his wild one. “I can help you to this extent, Anakin! Don’t ask things of me I have no control over!”

His expression shifted. Hurt. Ahsoka scoffed.

”You don’t have any right to look that way at me,” she spat. “Not after everything you did. You could spend the rest of your life trying to make up for it and you never would!”

 _What are you saying?_ Ahsoka thought too late. There was no taking the words back.

”Then do I have to die to prove myself?” He asked, “Will that fix this?”

” _No_...” Ahsoka breathed, horrified at herself. Shame coursed through her. “Of course not.”

Once more, Anakin lowered his gaze. He looked between the braces fixed to his forearms, raised them slowly and said, defeated,

”Remove these, and I’ll help you.”

There were so many ways in which things could go wrong. Maul’s suspicions snuck up on her, threatening to stray her hand, but the weight of the blade at her hip spurred her into motion. Ahsoka removed all of the inhibitors one by one. Behind her, she heard the guards protest, their relay of the events to Senator Organa. Ahsoka huffed. The others would be arriving soon.

”I’m putting what’s left of my faith in you on the line,” Ahsoka told him. Anakin rose to his full height, towering over her. But Ahsoka didn’t worry, anymore. There was nothing she could do but trust him, now. So she continued, unperturbed, “Don’t make me regret it.”

Footsteps bounded, running. Ahsoka turned just in time to find Maul, Windu and Obi-Wan rush into the foyer.

Behind her, Anakin stiffened.

“Ahsoka,” Mace started, “what have you done?”

”He’s agreed to help us,” she informed him evenly. “Let us out.”

The ray-shield remained intact. The guards looked between them with trepidation and worry.

The ship lurched, just a minute shift. They’d dropped out of hyperspace. Everyone held still, tense as taught rope. Only when the click of a cane sounded did the three outside the cell shift and split apart. Master Yoda appeared, sighed heavily as he waved his hand. The cell’s shield came down, releasing them. He lowered his hand to rest atop the other and spoke,

”Arrived, we have. Plan, have we?”


	31. Resolve

Like Ahsoka, the others pushed away their muddled feelings about Anakin because they had to. Still, it did nothing to cut the tension or dissolve the unsettling atmosphere he brought to the _Mantis’_ common room.

“I’m certain my access code is defunct, by this point,” Anakin surmised. He stood stiffly in the loose circle they’d formed to devise a way to the Fortress, keeping his arms rigidly folded one over the other as he spoke. “Every Imperial deck officer in the regime will have been alerted to either listen for or decimate any craft trying to gain clearance with it. And even if we managed to move past the Star Destroyers stationed above the moon undetected, Fortress Inquisitor’s sensors will detect this ship and blow it to pieces. Nothing save for a craft with explicit access will so much as breech the atmosphere, not without a cloaking device.”

Ahsoka’s lips became a thin, grim line. He’d given every possible scenario a fair bit of thought, which was... more than she’d hoped for. But his conclusions ruled out the use of the escape pods just past the common area, or anything else truly viable.

”So, you’re basically saying there’s nothing to be done,” Cere grit. Anakin met her cold, disbelieving glare with indifference.

”You asked for my help, so here is my suggestion: provoke the fleet enough to have them draw you in without blowing you up. Once inside, it won’t be difficult to take the bridge. We’ll land on the surface via the Star Destroyer.”

”And if, by some off-chance, this _doesn’t_ work?” Obi-Wan asked.

Anakin worked his jaw. When he responded, he looked nowhere else except for directly in front of him. It made his next declaration all the more terrible, but not terribly surprising.

”Destroy the Destroyer,” he suggested stiffly, remorselessly. Ahsoka had a flashback to the day of Order 66. Without having to think about it, she sought out Rex’s face among their tiny crowd. He did the same with her. The haunted look in his expression, she knew without a doubt, was reflected in her own. Anakin continued, oblivious to their shared turmoil, “Send it into a dive.”

“That is certainly _one_ way of reaching the surface,” Maul intoned, perhaps recalling that day as well.

“It’s risky,” Mace reminded.

”A very brutal and perhaps unnecessary way of going about what we’re trying to accomplish,” Obi-Wan agreed. “Many lives would be lost.”

Anakin, strangely, smirked.

”Is something funny?” Ahsoka asked him, standing a little straighter than she had been previously.

Anakin shook his head derisively, faced her...

”You all want to stand here and deliberate about the more morally high choice of the matter. I can promise you, most within the Empire won’t offer you that same courtesy.”

He pointed across the way to one of the Star Destroyers visible beyond the viewport.

”Take the Grand Admiral stationed above that moon, for example. He won’t think twice about ending his and the life of every single one of his crew, should he be compromised. When we successfully board and take control of the bridge, it will only be a matter of time before the ship goes down, one way or another. Besides...”

Anakin trailed off, hand falling to his side.

”... Besides?” Master Yoda ventured, affording him a patience he didn’t deserve.

Anakin’s fingers flexed, a movement so subtle that only Ahsoka’s echolocation caught the shift. She felt the feelings he so desperately tried to conceal, the slivers of a long severed Force-bond working their way through the stream of consciousness that once connected them. He was nervous about something, but it certainly wasn’t their current state of affairs. The confidence in his declaration of _when_ they boarded the Destroyer, and not _if_ , being the biggest indicator.

_It won’t be difficult to take the bridge..._

No, it wouldn’t be. Not for the truly desperate, which they were. And certainly not for Anakin, regardless of his motives now. Ahsoka had no doubt that, even in his current state, Anakin was still the one-man army he’d often held himself back from being during the war, but certainly not during the last year. She’d seen first hand the prowess he displayed when truly pressed.

There was no doubt in her mind they’d succeed.

But at what cost?

Anakin met the eyes of the former Jedi Council’s Grand Master unflinchingly when he responded,

”Fortress Inquisitor, given time, will be the least of your concerns.”

The unwavering certainty of his words chilled Ahsoka to her core.

* * *

Ahsoka stood in the center of an escape pod, securing Hedala into the safety restraints of her seat. Bail’s cruiser was eerily quiet, without the others on board.

“We’ll launch you out,” Ahsoka reminded Hedala, “and my friends will catch you with their ship. They’ll take good care of you until I come back.”

“You told me already,” Hedala pouted.

Ahsoka grappled. She wanted to lengthen what time they had left, but the ship sat idle as far from Mustafar’s moon as possible. It didn’t ensure they’d go undetected, and every moment mattered more than ever.

Ahsoka had contacted Trace and Rafa about taking a few aboard. They’d fled separately from Polis Massa aboard their ship, promising to wait in hiding until Ahsoka gave word. Master Windu and she had agreed sending off their mission’s unnecessary personnel would be in the best of interest of everyone. And while Ahsoka was far from disagreeing...

... she longed, again, for more time.

”Things won’t be like this for much longer,” Ahsoka said, sincerely meaning it, but hoping anyway that her actions would meet the expectations of her words. She brushed Hedala’s hair behind her ears and said, teasing, “When you board the _Silver Angel_ , be good for Trace and terrible for Rafa, okay?”

Hedala cracked a smile, managed a giggle and a nod.

”Eat plenty of food and get plenty of rest. And if in any situation you get a bad feeling, speak up,” Ahsoka continued. “Tell them, you understand?”

”What if they don’t believe me?” Hedala asked.

”They will,” Ahsoka promised. “I told them about your ability already.”

Hedala sighed and slumped against her. Ahsoka hugged her from the side and held her like that for as long as she could.

”One more thing,” Ahsoka asked some moments later, reluctantly pulling away. Hedala gazed up at her, waiting. “Take care of Kaeden and Miara the way they took care of you?”

Hedala agreed, making a criss-cross gesture over her chest with her hand, right above the heart. A vow, Ahsoka knew. She smiled as a result, only a slight tremor in her lips.

”Be brave,” she beckoned Hedala, taking her little hands in her own. The digits were chilled. Space was always cold. Ahsoka remembered it never stopped freezing — one just became accustomed to it. Still, Ahsoka rubbed Hedala’s hands with her own, trying to diffuse some warmth into them that she herself didn’t carry. Ahsoka, shivering or shaking — no more could she tell — continued, “And don’t look back.”

Someone cleared their throat. Ahsoka startled slightly, reluctantly released Hedala. She turned and found Kaeden and Miara standing in the escape pod’s entrance, waiting to board.

”I have to go now,” Ahsoka said. Hedala nodded. She ducked her head as Ahsoka stepped away, sniffing hard. Ahsoka fisted her hands at her sides as she started for the door. She’d already said her goodbyes with Miara, unable to do the same with her older sister, as she’d avoided her at every turn until that very moment. But now there was no avoiding one another. Ahsoka bit her lip when they passed each other, trying and failing to ignore the way her heart felt like it was twisting in her chest.

“ _Ahsoka_!”

She turned just in time to brace her arms, catching Kaeden between them. The force of the other girl’s embrace nearly unbalanced the both of them, but Ahsoka managed to find her footing and keep them upright before they toppled.

”I’m still upset,” Kaeden said, squeezing her so tight. She trembled. Ahsoka’s arms hovered around her, unsure of themselves. “But more than that, I’m worried about you. And I know if I don’t do this I’ll regret if for the rest of my life.”

She pulled back then, and her hands came up. Her calloused fingers splayed themselves on either side of Ahsoka’s face, only the faintest pressure. Ahsoka’s breath hitched in her throat. Kaeden’s gaze captured her own. Tears welled in her eyes. She whispered, so softly,

”If this isn’t okay, you have to let me know.”

And then Kaeden kissed her.

Ahsoka... relaxed. Tension she hadn’t known she’d been carrying since their hologram transmission gradually ebbed away. The kiss was chaste, nothing like the intense, heart pounding rush of the one Lux had initiated all that time ago. But it made her feel calm. It didn’t cause her heart to race nor her pulse to thrum, and yet... something exhilarating settled within her all the same. Because Kaeden’s kiss was unmistakable — it was a confirmation.

Too soon, Ahsoka felt Kaeden pulling away. She closed her eyes, pressed firmly back before they could fully separate, trying desperately to convey at least half of the sentiment that Kaeden had to her.

“It’s okay,” Ahsoka murmured the moment they fell apart. She swallowed thickly and repeated, voice cracking, “It’s _okay_.”

Kaeden turned away without another word, wiping viscously at her face with her hands. Belatedly, Ahsoka felt a wetness on her cheeks, reached up and found tears that did not belong.

The doors sealed and the pod launched not a moment after.

* * *

“I’m not like you, so I can’t pretend that a vision means anything to me,” Rex told her. He contemplated the blade in her hands with a critical eye. “I don’t know the Force; I know _you_. Your judgement is more sound than some energy field. Whatever you think you have to do, whatever decision you make, make sure it’s _your own_.”

Ahsoka contemplated the sword. She sat with Rex exactly where he’d found her, when he’d come looking for her — still aboard Bail Organa’s cruiser. After asking what was on her mind, why she hadn’t re-boarded the _Mantis_ , she’d explained Dagobah and the cave, what she’d witnessed and what she’d learned.

”I’m hesitating,” Ahsoka said. “I agree with you — visions can be tricky. They aren’t always clear. I could be drawing the wrong conclusions. But...”

But that in itself was the hesitation.

”Trust your instincts,” Rex said. Sardonically, “At this point, how much more wrong could we commit?”

It was gallows humor. Ahsoka knew it was meant to lighten the mood, and on some terrible level, it did. But it was also a stark reminder of how violent the last few days — and by extension, years — had been. Anakin had had a point, earlier. Who were they, the lot of them, to weigh their options when they hadn’t the time nor the options themselves? There was only one way they’d make it to Nur. Lives would be lost regardless of how they got there. There were bodies in the ship, below within the Fortress. And a select few might be innocent, working under the Empire to get themselves out of tough situations, unaware of the horrors and atrocities being committed right under their noses...

... but Jesse had been innocent. The 501st had been innocent. All of the clones in her company and in the GAR, used against their own will and dead or still controlled as a result of one man’s quest for power, were innocent. The Jedi who’d been mercilessly slaughtered had been innocent. The Fardi family, Kaeden and Miara, Sezja...

 _Oh, stars, Sezja_.

Ahsoka pressed a hand to her face, screwed her eyes shut. Rex reached out, curled his fingers around her shoulder in support.

Sitting like that, one hand holding the sword and the other holding herself together, Ahsoka steeled her resolve. The image of Sezja’s dying body burned behind her shut eyelids. No one could afford to be ignorant or willfully oblivious. Not anymore. She couldn’t think twice again, and she wouldn’t. The Empire certainly wouldn’t. 

In that at least, Anakin was not wrong.


	32. Rectify

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahsoka’s finally allowed  
> to Lose It™

They sent Bail away. Yoda went with him. When the Senator protested, citing they might require a backup plan, it took Obi-Wan reminding Organa that he needed to do damage control on Alderaan to persuade him to take to hyperspace. _We’ll contact you if we need you,_ Mace had appeased, but Ahsoka knew no one was willing to put the Senator in any further danger. That’s why Yoda had gone with him. There was a chance that the Alderaan Bail had left behind might not be the one he’d return to.

And more to the point — Bail couldn’t be seen conspiring with the people about to destroy Imperial property. There’d be no retreat, no surrender. The Fortress was going to be destroyed, and Ahsoka wouldn’t walk away until it was.

“May the Force be with you,” Organa bid them over holographic transmission.

Ahsoka watched his ship blip to light speed. His hologram fizzled out. Ahsoka turned to find Maul standing but feet away. She managed to scrounge up a rueful smile as she asked,

“Ready to cause some chaos?”

His dark eyes regarded her from the peripheral. Like space itself, so many lights bounced and glittered around the irises. In that way, he held a multitude of stars. Oddly, but maybe not oddly at all, he smirked and responded,

”Lady Tano, you said so yourself — it’s what I’m good at.”

* * *

Ahsoka stood behind the pilot’s chair, arms folded. She felt a shift partway to the fleet amassed above the moon. A shadow fell over the back of her frame. She turned her head over her shoulder to find Anakin staring at one of the Star Destroyers with a look intense enough to unnerve.

”Unathorized craft,” came the crackle of an Imperial over the ships interior comm., “Identify yourself.”

Like they’d rehearsed, Greez kept their pace steady and refrained from responding.

”Unathorized craft,” the Imperial repeated, more sternly, “ _Identify yourself._ ”

Beside her, the Force swelled around Anakin.

“Steady,” Ahsoka advised, though if she was talking to Greez or Anakin, not even she could tell.

”This is your final warning,” the Imperial barked, voice crackling over the speaker.

 _Non-hostile ships get interrogated, not decimated,_ Anakin had mentioned earlier. That thought was what kept Ahsoka calm as the tractor beam encircled them, pulling them into the nearest hangar of the Star Destroyer. It wasn’t, Ahsoka noted, the one that Anakin looked at so ferociously — but if anything, that unsettled her all the more.

 _In theory_ , he’d tacked on in afterthought. But that wasn’t important. Remaining optimistic in the face of their dire straits was.

Her nerves settled when their ship sat down safely on the hangar floor, the Imperial still in their ears, informing them to prepare for boarding. Everyone started for the exit. Anakin hesitated a moment, the Force unwinding around him. Ahsoka exhaled the breath she hadn’t meant to hold. Hadn’t that been too easy?

”What was that?” she asked as he finally turned to face her.

”It was... in case,” he responded.

”In case...?” Ahsoka ventured.

“In case,” he reaffirmed, the look on his face indicating he’d speak no more on the matter.

Reaching down, Ahsoka unclipped one of her sabers from her belt. She offered it to him wordlessly. The sword remained at her side.

” _In case_ ,” she said in response to his questioning, slightly suspicious regard.

He eyed her for a careful moment more before reaching down and accepting it.

* * *

Once they took the hangar, it was to their respective missions: Obi-Wan and Cody to the rear of the ship where the engines resided, Cere, Mace and Maul to the the hyperdrive room, Rex and Barriss staying behind with the ship to act as the _Mantis’s_ last line of defense should things go awry, and Anakin and herself moving up the lifts — until the moment the crew caught on to their schemes, that was, stalling them partway to the bridge. Ahsoka cut a hole in the top. She was first out, using the Force to propel herself wondering if the rest of her life would involve flinging herself up chutes in increasingly ridiculous, life-threatening circumstances. _Things could be worse_ , she figured.

_Anakin could still be in that suit._

She risked a glance at him as they worked their way up the lift. He wore all they’d had on hand on either ship, a grey slim suit with bits and pieces of an Alderaanian guardsmen’s uniform fastened atop.

 _How are you feeling?_ she wondered. _Do you hurt? Are you still healing?_

Nothing about him on the outside betrayed a physical pain. A year of suffering in comparison to now probably meant it wasn’t as difficult as Ahsoka imagined it to be for him, but she also didn’t put it past Anakin to pretend he was fine when he truly wasn’t.

They climbed in silence for another moment before an access opened just a few stories beneath them. Troopers leaned out, shooting at them. Ahsoka dodged the blaster fire as it soared up, but quickly discovered the troopers’ assault was the least of their worries. The lift had been reactivated, was rushing up to meet them. Ahsoka blanched, mind scrambling—

Suddenly, everything beneath them shifted. The chute shook. Pipes popped and wires sprang. Circuits sparked and the four walls beneath them crumbled together like flimsi. It was as if a fist had reached around the outsides and squeezed. A fist had, Ahsoka registered numbly. Beside her, Anakin dangled one handed from the ledge of the nearest access, the hand not hanging on unclenching. The lift soon stalled, caught by his destruction. The troopers that had fired at them were gone, cut off from their vantage point.

Somewhere else in the ship emitted a deep, terrible rumble.

”Something went wrong,” Ahsoka said.

The bridge hadn’t been taken yet. They hadn’t even the opportunity to try.

”There’s nowhere to go but up,” Anakin reminded her. Ahsoka didn’t hesitate a second longer. Summoning the Force around her, she flew. She caught the lip of an access, opened it with a thought and back flipped her way into the hall. She hadn’t even started running when the ship lurched violently, pitching her forward. The lights flickered in the hall, went out. Ahsoka hit the floor and slid, tumbling uncontrollably.

Over the comm. system they’d secured before leaving the _Mantis_ , Ahsoka heard Obi-Wan shout,

” _ID-9, turn on anti-gravity countermeasures!_ ”

Ahsoka wasn’t sure if that was even within the droid’s capabilities. _If only they had an astromech..._

Ahsoka managed to flip herself onto her back and fall into a skid. The wall at the end of the hall was quickly coming to meet her...

She landed on her feet, perfectly balanced. A moment later, Anakin was beside her. But the ship was still turning.

”It’s inverting,” Anakin said.

”Obi-Wan,” Ahsoka tried through the comm. “What happened? Are you alright?”

 _Static_. Her heart thudded.

”We need to hurry,” Ahsoka breathed. Hurry to what, though? It seemed taking the bridge didn’t matter anymore, nor would it maybe even be possible.

Anakin didn’t move. Numbly, Ahsoka realized he was waiting for her to make their decision. Ahsoka reached for the wall, thinking. The Mantis might already be destroyed, and that thought was horrifying, but she had to acknowledge it. _Unless Greez flew out,_ was the next thought. Hopefully they hadn’t tried to wait. Hopefully he, Rex and Barriss had fled.

As the Destroyer continued to turn, Ahsoka and Anakin braced themselves to turn with it. Muffled screaming and shouts echoed from every direction. Ahsoka crouched, crawling toward the ceiling. There was an awful, all encompassing _crack_. By the sounds of it, it was the hull. It was... _breaking_. The ship rattled so hard it shook her bones. Ahsoka was immediately up, running in the opposite direction of where it had sounded.

 _The ship’s split_ , she realized. There was no mistaking it. That crack hadn’t been an explosion, but there were all kinds of explosions now, followed by the biggest bang and buck of them all. Unbeknowst to her at that very moment, the Destroyer on which they resided had crashed into another stationed nearby.

The anti-grav would be useless, now.

”We need to find a way out of here,” Anakin shouted at her above the noise.

”Is anyone there?” Ahsoka asked into her wrist comm. Again, there was nothing but static. No responses.

”They’re jamming the frequency,” Anakin surmised.

”I know!” Ahsoka snapped, panic-tinged.

What was happening to the others?

She rounded a corner, and somewhere, something else exploded. But it was nearer than before. The ship pitched again. Ahsoka hit the wall, heart leaping into her throat. She was pressed there by the force of descent, unable to move. They were _diving_.

That meant they’d entered the moon’s atmosphere.

Ahsoka managed to turn her head to the side, having caught movement in the peripheral. She found Anakin, lips peeled back and teeth bared crawling his slow way toward her. His digits dented the metal walls. When he was within reaching distance, he slid one arm along the wall, extended his fingers—

Ahsoka slung her own arm out, catching his wrist...

After that, everything happened quickly. Something gave, and air whipped around them. Ahsoka hit his chest hard enough to wind them both. Heat blossomed at her back at the same moment Anakin’s arms came around her, their grip an unbreakable vice. Light flooded her vision, but it wasn’t natural. It was concussive and too bright, too hot. By the time Ahsoka realized they were free falling through the air, they were about to hit the surface of a large body of water.

 _This is jumping off the back of the Twilight,_ she thought. _This is leaping from the droid wall on Geonosis,_ she assured herself. But a creeping fear in her tried to parallel what was happening then to what had happened a year ago, but...

... it wasn’t the same. And there was one fundamental reason why — Ahsoka had been scared out of her mind during the events of Order 66, even if she hadn’t shown it, hadn’t believed it herself. But the truth was that, all those times before, every moment she’d ever taken to the sky’s mercy...

The truth was that she’d never feared the fall with Anakin at her side.

And now was no exception.

As they plummeted, Anakin released her just enough to straighten them both, get their arms and legs extended with the moon’s surface. But his grip on her wrist stayed firm and unrelenting. Ahsoka was grateful for it. Summoning the Force, they pushed and then pulled at the water in tandem. A wave lifted, rising to meet them, swallowed them whole. In the depths, it was a race to the shore. Though Anakin had put considerable distance between them and the Destroyer, the wake it would make when it impacted would be violent. And it _was_ violent, rocking them forward and under every time they broke the surface. By the time they made it to shore, Ahsoka’s muscles and lungs were screaming. She collapsed in a heap in the sand, exhausted...

Smoke billowed from the rapidly sinking Destroyer. Faintly, she realized that it wasn’t just the one, but one and a half...

”Up,” came Anakin’s labored voice. He was wheezing, the breath sounding punctured and wet and raspy. He was above her, grabbing her under the arms, hauling her bodily back into the dense forest just beyond the shore. And when she looked up through the dark haze rapidly covering the blue sky, she realized why. Another Destroyer — perfectly intact and whole — was rapidly descending towards the surface.

From its trajectory, it didn’t seem as if it would land near, but that didn’t mean either of them could risk exposure.

”Please, please...” Ahsoka muttered, getting to her feet. She dashed after Anakin deeper into the forest, trying the comm. relentlessly. Worse than static was nothing, but that was exactly what greeted her.

”We can still finish this,” Anakin said when they’d stopped to catch their breath. He wasn’t looking at her or even the wreckage, though. Instead, he watched through the trees for the Destroyer. He was covered in soot, clothes singed. Ahsoka didn’t fare much better. They’d been caught in the edges of a blast, she realized, had narrowly avoided it. Anakin... had saved them both. “It’s why we came here.”

Ahsoka nodded slowly, trying to process it all. What had gone wrong? She didn’t know, and now she might never.

That terrible feeling that coursed through her on the track at Polis Massa returned full force, slamming what little she had in her stomach up her throat and onto the ground. She hunched, shaking from it until it had passed.

When she looked up, Anakin was hovering. His brow drew.

”What-?” he asked, aborted, the audacity to look concerned.

He reached out—

—Ahsoka slapped his hand away.

 _How dare he?_ she thought, pure venom. _How dare he drag her to hell and take her leg, try to turn her to the dark side in some twisted effort to save her?_

How dare he be concerned, now?

”We wouldn’t even be in this situation if it wasn’t for you!” she screamed, something within her snapping.

And she started to laugh. The longer she laughed, the more hysterical it became. _You’re slipping_ , a voice in the back of her head said.

Anakin took a step backward. Ahsoka screwed her eyes shut, pressed her forehead to the moon’s solid ground and gave one terrible, wet sob. She hadn’t sorted out her emotions. She wondered now if she ever would. All of the people she’d come with might be dead, and all she had left was the mission and her former Jedi Master, the man who’d destroyed not just her life but his own.

 _Pull yourself together, just for a little bit longer,_ she begged of herself. Breaking down now wouldn’t do any of them good.

“Take me to the Fortress,” Ahsoka grit, rising slowly back to her feet. She exhaled roughly and met his unreadable expression. They might be the only ones left, but that didn’t mean they could abandon the mission. Cere, having been a prisoner of the Fortress just a few short months ago, had had intimate knowledge of the facility’s inner workings — but Ahsoka knew Anakin did as well. He’d trained the Inquisitors, after all. He _had_ to know where to find the facility from their position — she wouldn’t accept anything less.

Without a word Anakin nodded, turned and led the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “wasn’t it weird how anakin was acting as the tractor beam took them in? didn’t he seem more eager to help than he had previously?”
> 
> if you asked yourself these questions, or questions similar in vein to these, well then you’re smelling what’s been cooking ;)
> 
> 02/25/21 update: cleaned up the relationship tags a bit even though i said i wouldn’t touch the tags anymore because they were certifiably Messy and needed to be downsized


End file.
